Queen of My Heart
By
Jordan Silver
Copyright © 2014 Alison Jordan
All Rights Reserved
Table of Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Epilogue
Chapter 1
"The king has renounced you. You must leave the palace at once."
Shame, I'm sent home in shame. My people, my family, my father's subjects; they all know and have heard by now. I am now known far and wide as the unwanted bride, the cast out. How had this happened, what had I done? I've searched my soul these many days but still no answer would come.
My heart which had barley awakened has withered and died within me. The king, that most beautiful of men of his land and the surrounding kingdoms, he who was the envy of all who knew or had ever heard of him. The youngest to have ever sat on the throne in any known kingdom to this day had rejected me.
His prowess on the battlefield was legendary, but no more so than his legendary acts of kindness. So of course in this world ruled by men, the fault will automatically fall upon me; one who was innocent.
Why had he come into my life to destroy it? Why had he not left me to my small kingdom hidden away beneath the care of my loving sire? I would’ve gladly lived out my days there unwed and without prospect of children, rather than to face this shame.
He had conquered the surrounding lands in no time when so many others had failed before him. The ancients had sworn fealty in a bid to save themselves and their people. Fearful of the man they called the young lion. He had shown mercy where he bid, and none where he so desired. It was said that he had no fear of death, a worthy adversary who would stop at nothing to achieve his gains.
And when it had been decided by him that instead of warring with our kingdom which was the nearest to his own lands but to take my father's only child's hand in marriage, namely me, I had run and hid. I knew nothing of marriage and men more acquainted with the ways of fencing than that of needlework.
I saw married life, as little more than servitude, always to be at your husband’s beck and call, living according to his will. No, that was not for me. I longed to roam the hillsides of my father’s kingdom freely, to rule my days as I saw fit. With an indulgent parent who doted on me that was never too hard.
Father had soothed my fears with stories of this young king's kindness, a little known fact he said. This king Shane of the Dales was bandied about in every circle of the kingdoms far and wide. And when first I laid eyes upon him, my young foolish heart had sung within my chest, and now this. Cast aside like refuge, with nary a word of warning, not even a goodbye.
"Daughter, you must eat, it is not good that you have gone these many days without sustenance; come you must eat something lest you perish." He hovered even as he wrung his hands in despair. The very sight of him hurt the heart, for how could I face him? The father I’d disappointed so gravely. The one to whom I’d brought such shame.
"Let me die father. What use am I to you? I've brought shame upon your head. I've tarnished your throne. I would that you banish me to some abandoned castle afar off so I may wallow in peace." My heart was pierced even now at the thought of never seeing my king’s face again. If I die, he will be lost to me forever, but what difference that? He was lost to me now anyway.
"Nonsense girl, have you no faith? If I know one thing it is this, whatever foul deed was done to bring this about will be brought to light. And this I know as well, that when that young king gazed upon you at the first he was smitten. How could he not be? Your beauty is renown far and wide as much as his might with a sword. I daresay that is why he put the question of marriage to me instead of the sword.” He laughed. How could he laugh at such a time as this? And where did he get the notion that the king would ever stoop so low as to go back on his edict?
“I’m afraid you’re misleading yourself father. It’s your own love for me that has blinded you to the truth.” The words were like bitter gall on my tongue. If only what he said were true. And why do you care? Haven’t you taught yourself in these last days to despise the one who has treated you so carelessly? Who have trampled the love you offered beneath his feet as though it were nothing?
“I watched him that night and the following days of your ceremony. He's very taken with you. I would not have so easily given you over to him had I not seen that tender way he beheld you. No, I will hold out hope that he will come to his senses and replace you on the throne where you belong. I can't help but think that there was some jealousy at play here. Remember his people would've wanted him to wed a noble woman of their own peerage. These political things are always full of intrigue...."
"Yes father, but tell me, has there ever been a case such as mine? Where a wife had been cast out like offal, no words spoken, no explanation? I was treated worst than a dog."
"Yes, and you shall make him pay when he comes begging on bended knee."
"Never, my Shane is too proud." Dratted tongue; I hung my head to hide my flaming cheeks from his all too knowing gaze.
"Ah, so you still hold a tender for your king yes."
"I do not wish to speak of him, my foolish heart knows nothing. I should take my trusty dagger and plunge it into the stupid thing so I could find some solace at last."
"Such drivel, hush now and let me think."
I left him to his pondering as I walked atop the parapet, it's the only place I found any respite these days. Even my maids glanced upon me with pity it was most humbling.
Not even the birds in their plumage brought the joy they once did. They only served to remind me of the days I spent with Shane walking in the palace gardens as we got to know each other. Or the beautiful parrot he'd had brought to me as my very own. Even he was lost to me now, everything taken, but why? Oh will the pain never end? Why hadn't I the strength to throw myself down from here, why couldn't I end my own sorrow? Coward, spineless fool.
Chapter2
Shane
"Shane, what have you done, where is Rhiannon?"
"Not now mother, do not mention that female's name to me."
"What has gone on here? Your father and I go to our lands in the north and come back to this madness. My new daughter in law banished and no one would tell me why. My son is in his cups and it's not even half a day yet, no my son, you will tell me and you will tell me now."
"Elizabeta..."
"No Cassius, I will not leave it, I know my children and I know when my son gave his heart. I will not rest until I know who broke it and why."
"She betrayed me with another man." I spat the words out in haste for even now they still burned. I should’ve beheaded her instead of sending her back to her father. No doubt she was now free to carry on with her lover. The two of them were probably laughing at my expense even now, the very thought enraged me. But alas my foolish heart would not allow me to bring harm to her, no matter that she had brought be low. Cuckolded me in front of my people.
"Never."
"Mother..."
NEVER...princess Rhiannon did not cheat on you; have you gone mad?"
"I saw her...."
"You saw what?"
"I saw her meet with him in secret they passed time together, I cannot..."
"This cannot be; with whom did she meet?"
This was a hard blow I’m sure for mother, she’d taken the…my queen under her wing and
the two had spent many an afternoon passing the time together. No doubt she had begun to see the girl as a daughter, only to be betrayed like we all were.
"There's a note, here." I gave her the damaging missive that had been given to me the filth that had turned my days of sunshine into ash. I had fallen in love with a girl at first sight, given her my heart before an exchange of words, only to be played for a fool. Me, Shane of the Dales, the most fearsome warrior in the kingdom and beyond had been brought low by a deceiving serpent. I was a laughingstock now, though no one dared to my face. I had my pick of women, why then had I chosen one that turned out to be my undoing? My people had begged me not to wed her, but for the sake of the alliance and tiring of war I had forged ahead. Then with one sight I had lost my heart. Thank heavens I hadn’t been stupid enough to confess my love to her.
"Who gave this to you?" Mother held out the damaging note to me, I wished never to see the thing again but like a homing rod I’m ever drawn to it. Reading the words of her betrayal. They were a great reminder of my folly, something I will never have befall again in this lifetime.
"Does it matter? You see what it says."
"And I will explain but first I will have the name of the one who gave it."
Explain, what could she possibly mean by that? I watched her questioningly as I gave her the answer she was after.
"Ella Stefano."
"Ah, so the scum is rising to the top of the pot, do you know how she came by this?"
"No, I didn't think to ask, what difference does it make?" I was beginning to get a very bad feeling here. I know my mother and the love she bears her children. Instead of anger and outrage at her supposed daughter in law’s betrayal, she seemed more incited at the bearer of the note. Why was that?
"Jason is Rhiannon's childhood friend Shane. The young man is impaired he was born with one leg shorter than the other. When others shunned and scorned him our Rhiannon took him under her wing. He's a few summers younger than she, though to hear her tell it her adopted brother of the heart is a giant."
"How..."
"How do I know? Because she shared this with me, this letter is about a promise she made to him when she wed you, that she would gain your permission to bring him here. We spoke of it many times and I pressed her to bring the matter to you. But she wanted to wait until things were more stable between you two.
"But I saw them, they embraced." And had both come to within an inch of dying. The young man would’ve had me or my men caught up with him but at my cry of rage that night he’d been forewarned and had taken off on his steed.
"As they should, do you not greet Mara and Sabrina the same after a long absence?"
"But why didn't she tell me, why didn't she defend herself?" This cannot be true, had she been innocent she would’ve told me. She would’ve defended her honor, her good name.
"Did you even give her a chance? If I know you son you did not. You have a cool head only on the battlefield, in everything else you're as hotheaded as some we will not mention." She glared over at my father who held up his hands in supplication.
"Leave me out of it woman." My father joked as he reclined on the divan in my private rooms which my mother had barged into unannounced, as was her way. I looked back and forth between them trying to make sense of my mother’s words. There was a tumult going on inside me, there was also hope.
"If this is true I...oh my...fuck...excuse me mother, I didn't mean...How can this be? How could I have fouled things up like this?”
“Son you spend much time studying the ways of war, you’ve never had much time for affairs of the heart. But didn’t you learn anything about your wife in the time she was here? Couldn’t you see her heart? Rhian would never so what you’ve accused her of, the girl has a code of honor to rival your own.”
“I thought this as well mother but…seeing that missive you must admit there was room for doubt. It’s so incriminating, makes her look guilty as hell.” As I spoke the words I saw her face in my minds’ eye; that beauty that transcends all others that grace with which she carried herself. She was the last thing I saw at night before I closed my eyes even now.
“There are those who would seek to destroy her because of the love you bore her Shane; those who sought that love and more so your throne for themselves. It’s not too hard to see what has gone on here.”
“Ella? No.”
“Not she, but the other one.”
I saw the look of distaste that crossed her face at the mere mention of the girl; like most women mother is into palace intrigue where as I have no time for such things. My days are better spent securing my kingdom than involving myself in the daily gossip mill.
At least they had been before this debacle. I looked down at the cup in my hand; how many was this now?
I thought of the one of whom she spoke but I could not get my mind around her implication. “That cannot be mother, Dante has been my loyal friend and ally these many years. The Stefanos are a family of great standing.” But what if there were some truth to her words? What if all the smiles and soft touches over the years had been hiding something more? Something I saw as the innocent adoration of a young subject for her king? No I won’t believe it, and besides there was the letter. Like me the one who found it might just have easily misunderstood as I had.
“I cannot think of these things now, first I have to figure out how to undo the wrong I’ve done.” And hope to the heavens that it was not too late; that I hadn’t caused such harm as to be irreparable. Has she spent her days as I have? I think not, the lady Rhiannon wouldn’t bury her woes in wine I daresay. But how has she dealt with what must now seem to her like my betrayal? My gut churned at the thought of the things I’d done since reading that letter.
I have spent everyday since trying to drown the memory of her from my being. I no longer found solace on the training field and had turned everything over to my second in command when it became evident that my head wasn’t in it. Thankfully my enemies to the south had waited until just this day to rear their ugly heads. There was still time yet to put down their minor rebellion.
“I have but a fortnight to take care of this matter before I have to turn my attention to the Torcs, they remain ever a pain in my arse but at least I can keep them at bay for that long. I’ve wasted precious time wallowing in my cups as you can see.” I lifted the tankard, which I still held and she scoffed before coming over to kiss my brow.
"Totally understandable son, now what are you going to do about this mess?"
"I'm going to get my wife." I was out the door in a hurry until I reached the stables and realized I was in my dressing gown and barefoot to boot. No wonder my servants had given me a wide birth I probably looked like a lunatic, heaven knows I've been acting like one these last few weeks.
I ran back to my rooms where my mother stood holding out my clothing with a smirk on her face.
"I think I'd better come with you son, you might muck things up again."
"Thanks mother, greatly appreciated."
“Will you tell your advisers what you’re about?”
I could tell from her tone that she didn’t like that idea very much, but I had no intent on divulging this information. Not yet, if there was treason against the queen afoot I will know soon enough when I brought her back home.
“I think not mother, I will take only a contingent of a few trusted men and that is all.”
I'm coming for you my queen; I hope her kind-heartedness extended to idiot husbands who made a spectacle of her. For fuck's sake I'd made her a laughingstock throughout the kingdoms. I'm so sorry Rhiannon I'll make it up to you I promise.
Chapter 3
Rhiannon
"Queen Rhiannon, your king has arrived, you must come." My maids were all in a flurry around me as I sat quietly among them. The day had started like any other in the last few weeks dreary and never ending. I had consoled myself with the fact that this was to be my life now. A shunned wife had not many prospects and no one would dare e
ven approach the cast off wife of the vaunted king Shane of the Dales. Not that I had any interest in men, but I had come to yearn for children, his children. The thought was too harsh to bear. Now this.
"I am no queen, I have no king." My heart raced so loudly within my chest it was a wonder the maids couldn't hear it.
"You must get dressed mistress, please come." How soon they forget, could they not recall the broken shell of a woman I had been when I first returned here? How can they be so excited at the prospect of seeing the one who had done their own mistress such grievous harm? It was another testament to the charm and charisma of Shane. All who knew him fell for his outward manner, but only I knew the true beast that dwelt within. For hadn’t I been the one to feel the sting from the dragon’s tail?
"No, leave me." Fortified with renewed thoughts of the wrong done to me I held fast my position. I knew not why he had shown up here. Maybe it was to annul our union once and for all. The thought was like a piercing sword through the heart and caused me to lash out even farther at my ladies in waiting. “Be gone from me you traitors, go bow and scrape before your king, I shall not lay eyes upon that man unless it is to run him through with my sword.”
They knew better than to bother with me after that, no doubt they'd rush off to father to tell him that I was being difficult again. It has been three weeks since I've been home, and even father has given up trying to talk to me. I find comfort only in my own company and my memories, memories of a love so short lived and never consummated.
My thoughtful king or so I thought at the time had sought to give me time to get to know him before bedding me. Now I knew there was something more at play, that viper Tamar Stefano had whispered it in my ears often enough. But I'd chosen not to believe her, instead I'd put my trust in my stupid heart and his foul lies, if I had the chance I would cut them from his throat with a rusted knife.
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