by Cora Brent
“They’re never burnt,” Cord boomed, entering the backyard twirling a grilling utensil and wearing an absurd white chef’s hat. “Just well done.”
Cassie put her hand to the side of the mouth and loudly whispered, “They’re burnt.”
“Thanks for the support, Cassidy,” Cord sighed and fired up the grill.
Cassie grinned and kissed her father on the cheek. “Love you, Daddy.”
“I know. That’s why you’re allowed to get away with insulting my grilling skills.”
Cassie and her sister opted to return to the house. I noticed the way Dalton stared at his girlfriend with a goofy grin as she walked away. I didn’t know much about this Dalton dude but the boy was smitten, that was for sure.
“I never burn the damn burgers,” Cord grumbled as he tossed some slabs on meat on the grill.
Dalton threw me a look and nodded. I smothered a laugh.
Brecken came outside with the ancient mutt known as Angus the Dog. Angus still had some life left in him and would retrieve a ball if thrown but then it seemed he would lose interest and drop it under a bush somewhere. After a few minutes Brecken got bored and left Angus to go pant in the shade.
My brother approached Dalton rather shyly. “I heard you used to play baseball,” he said.
“Sure did,” Dalton said cheerfully. “You like baseball?”
“Yeah. I watch the D-Backs games sometimes.”
Dalton smiled. “You ever play any yourself.”
Brecken scrunched up his face. “Not really. I’m not very good at it.”
“Maybe we could toss a few balls sometime. I could give you some pointers.”
Brecken’s face was hopeful. “Really?”
“Sure. I run a kids’ baseball camp a few miles from here. How old are you?”
“Thirteen,” answered Brecken in a soft voice. He was sensitive about the fact that he looked a few years younger.
Dalton was kind enough to just nod and say, “That’s the perfect age to start playing baseball.”
Somehow it was still a surprise to me that everyone in the Gentry family went out of their way to be kind. Apparently it was a prerequisite that even extended to significant others because Dalton immediately starting schooling Brecken on the finer points of throwing a ball. Brecken eagerly soaked up every word.
He’d never been the center of attention the way he had ever since Saylor brought him home. She found out what his favorite foods were and immediately purchased them all. She insisted on buying him an entirely new wardrobe despite my weak objections. Saylor just winked and said she loved to shop and anyway the boy had outgrown most of his old clothes. It wasn’t really true. Brecken hadn’t grown much at all these past six months. Some of Cassie’s teenage cousins who were also on summer break came over to help tutor him with math. I still took him to summer school every morning but instead of wandering over to the youth center afterwards he would get picked up by Saylor and they would have lunch. No wonder why the kid was ecstatic these days. He even looked healthier with a ruddy glow on his cheeks. The only cloud hanging over the current situation was Tristan. He hadn’t been in touch. I’d left word with the motel management in case he turned up there looking for us but I wasn’t optimistic the toothless hood-eyed manager would pass the information along even though I spotted him a twenty. I wished I had better news for Brecken when he would ask me at the end of every day if I’d heard from our brother. I also wished I knew if Tristan was out there in the world confronting all kinds of horrors and temptations. I constantly hoped he’d found a safe refuge. Deck Gentry had pulled me aside this afternoon to give me the bad news that he hadn’t had any luck tracking Tristan’s whereabouts. The Phoenix metropolitan area was immense and crowded. If a seventeen year old kid wanted to disappear into its depths he wouldn’t have to try very hard.
I’d drifted over to the corner of the yard and become lost in thought, watching Dalton instruct Brecken while Cord flipped the burgers and waved away clouds of smoke. I didn’t know Cassie had returned to the backyard until I heard her voice right beside me.
“Mom actually asked me if we should eat outside,” Cassie said. She roped her mane of thick hair into a knot at the base of her neck and fanned herself with one hand. “I told her she was crazy. It’s got to be a hundred and ten out here.”
“It’s Arizona in the summer,” I said. “Probably a few degrees north of the temperature of hell.”
Cassie picked off a tiny purple flower from a nearby sage bush. “I guess it’s as hot or hotter down in Emblem.”
“Just about.”
Cassie twirled the flower under her chin. “My grandpa still lives down there but he prefers to come up here rather than have us visit him. He says there are too many dangerous parts of town now. I know my mom was trying to talk him into moving up here now that he’s retired from the prison but he says he was born in Emblem and he plans to die there.”
“That’s a common sentiment in Emblem.”
Cassie was watching me. “Do you still know people down there? In Emblem?”
I thought about them, the people I knew who were still there. A handful of decent folks mixed in with the burnouts and the criminals. And of course there was the huge population of inmates behind the fences of the state prison. Can’t forget about them. Some of them had been Emblem kids once.
“Not many,” I told her. “Most of the people I knew down there are not the kind you ought to keep in your life if you want to avoid wearing an orange jumpsuit.”
“What?” She was confused.
“The prison uniform.”
“Oh.” Cassie held her flower in the palm of her hand. It was wilting already. She let it fall to the ground and then fastened me with a frank expression. “You’re lonely, aren’t you, Curtis? I mean, I know you’ve been busy working and trying to keep your brothers together but there are some things even family can’t help you with, right?”
I’d never thought about it that way. Being lonely. It seemed like I hadn’t been alone in many months. But that wasn’t what Cassie meant. And she wasn’t just talking about me. Strangely enough, it seemed like she was talking about herself too.
“some things even family can’t help you with…”
“Yes,” I said.
She nodded. “I get it.”
I didn’t see how she could. Cassie was beautiful and sweet and adored by her family and probably everyone who crossed her path. She ought to have the world at her feet.
“How could a girl like you be lonely?” I asked. I was honestly curious.
The question annoyed her. “What does that mean?”
I hadn’t meant to say anything wrong. “Nothing.”
“Is this about Parker?”
“Who?” It took me a moment to realize she was talking about the douchebag who’d slithered into Scratch one day, the same one she’d been smiling at in the coffee shop afterwards. “Oh, that asshole.”
“He’s not an asshole.”
I shrugged. “If you say so.”
Cassie didn’t appear convinced herself. She tugged at her lip. “At least not anymore. I used to hate him. But people can change for the better, don’t you think?”
“Not that fucking guy,” I said tersely. I didn’t know why I was suddenly fuming over the memory of Cassie smiling at Parker what’s-his-face. Or why I was so fucking sure that he was up to no good.
Cassie glared at me. “You don’t know everything about people,” she said and stalked back to the house.
When I glanced around the yard I saw that Cord was still actively blackening the hamburgers, Dalton was still instructing Brecken and Angus the Dog had fallen asleep in the shade. No one had been paying the slightest attention to the brief interaction between Cassie and me except one person.
Cami Gentry kept her eyes on me as her twin sister left the backyard.
She did not look pleased.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Before Cami left with Dalton she grabbed me by the
elbow and pulled me into the bedroom we’d shared for most of our lives.
“Explain,” she demanded, crossing her arms and blocking the door.
“Huh?”
My sister rolled her eyes. “Don’t forget who you’re talking to. We shared a womb. I know everything about you.”
I rolled my eyes right back and sat on my bed. “Then by all means, proceed with the interrogation, Madame Reporter.”
Cami sat beside me and searched my face. “You never mentioned you were into him.”
I was a bad liar. “Who?”
She smirked. “The Bad Boy from Emblem, Arizona. Hell, I thought you might jump on him right there in the backyard.”
“That’s crazy. You’re crazy.”
“No I’m not.”
I couldn’t keep up the façade under Cami’s scrutiny. “Nothing has happened,” I said. “Nothing’s going to happen.”
“Does Curtis know that? He’s good at playing it cool but I bet he jacks off while thinking about you every night.”
“Camille!” I squeaked, glancing at the closed door. “He sleeps on the couch every night.”
“Oh yeah.” She made a face. “Remind me not to sit there again anytime soon.”
“He’s not jacking off on our damn couch every night. He wouldn’t do that. This is a stupid conversation.”
Cami studied me. “You hardly know him, Cass.”
“And you do?”
“No. From what Mom and Dad say, he’s a decent guy. But he’s also got a past.” My sister sighed and hugged my pillow to her chest. “Never mind, I’m just feeling protective. It’s just that you deserve a prince, Cassidy.”
I was touched in spite of my irritation. “Princes are tough to come by,” I reminded her.
She smiled. “I found one.”
“I know.”
“You will too.”
I wasn’t sure about that. “Maybe someday.”
She hugged me. “Just don’t accept anything less.”
Our mother knocked on the door and asked Cami if she and Dalton would like to take home any of the leftover grilled hamburgers.
“Ooh, hard pass,” Cami whispered. Then she said out loud, “No thanks, Mom. You guys keep them. Enjoy.” Then she grew serious as she rose from the bed. “Remember, Cass. Nothing less.”
“See you soon, Cams,” I said, giving my sister’s hand one final squeeze before I followed her out of the room. This bedroom had been the scene of ten thousand dreams and whispers between two little girls who were born being the best of friends. Sometimes Cadence would hang out in here too but she’d always possessed a streak of independence a mile wide. She never seemed to need us the way Cami and I needed each other.
About two minutes after Cami and Dalton left my mother had the impulsive idea to go out for frozen yogurt.
“Come with us,” she urged, pulling on my arm in the kitchen. “It’ll be fun.”
I didn’t want to go. I wanted to stay home and brood over the things Cami had said about Curtis. He wasn’t around, having gone to the store to get some groceries or something. Even though my folks kept insisting he didn’t need to restock the cupboards he was stubborn about it.
“I think I’m going to stay here,” I told my mother.
“Do me a favor and let the dog out,” my dad said. “He peed on the floor a little while ago.”
“Poor Angus. He’s getting old.”
My dad touched the area near his temples where the hair was beginning to turn gray. “He’s not the only one.”
“Well, I hope you don’t start pissing on the floor. I don’t think I can handle that.”
“I think I’m at least a few years away from that possibility,” my father said. “You want us to bring you back anything?”
“No thanks. It would just melt in this heat by the time you got home anyway.”
“Okay. See you in a little while.”
Once everyone was gone Angus the Dog padded into the kitchen, panting the whole time, and stopped to look at his water bowl expectantly. I refilled it and patted him on the head while he drank. His tail moved slowly from side to side and I had a melancholy flashback to Angus as a puppy, this relentlessly wiggling, black shaggy creature with infinite energy.
While petting Angus I noticed that there was a ketchup stain the size of a quarter on my shirt, courtesy of the burnt hamburger dinner. I dashed to my room for a quick change of clothes while Angus was lapping up his water. I planned to slip into my usual pajamas of loose shorts and a shapeless t-shirt but then I remembered a nightie that was hanging at the back of my closet. It wasn’t all sex and laciness but instead made of comfortable cotton and fell to my knees. Still, it hugged my body in all the right places and even though I wished it were a color other than a tame, virginal white, I knew I looked good in it.
And who are you trying to look good for, Cassidy?
I told myself it didn’t matter either way. He wasn’t even here right now and I was already yawning enough to justify an early bedtime. He probably wouldn’t be back by the time I shut my door for the night.
Angus was already waiting at the backdoor and whimpering to be let out. The second I slid the sliding glass doors open he galloped into the darkness. The back patio lights were off and I decided not to turn them back on. Instead I stepped outside into the stillness of a desert summer night punctuated by the music of crickets and alight with stars. The stars weren’t as bright here in the middle of a major metropolitan area. They would be brighter and far more numerous away from the city lights, down in Emblem. At least I thought they would. I’d never been to Emblem at night. My father would be able to tell me whether the stars were brighter there. So would Curtis.
“Where did everyone go?” Curtis’s voice startled me. I hadn’t heard the sliding glass doors open but suddenly there he was beside me in the backyard. Angus trotted over to him, licked his outstretched hand and then returned to the darkest corner of the yard.
I cleared my throat, ignoring the way my pulse began to race. There was something intimate and a little dangerous about being out here alone with Curtis in the darkness.
“Cami and Dalton left. My parents took Brecken out for some frozen yogurt.” A piece of hair fell in my face. Earlier I’d tied it all back in a knot because I was hot but now I pulled it free and let it cascade past my shoulders. There wasn’t much light since I hadn’t turned on the patio lights. I could hardly see Curtis. I assumed he could hardly see me. But I sensed the way his eyes raked me over so he must have seen enough. He was close now, close enough for me to smell the musky scent of his aftershave and hear the way his breathing quickened. A primitive feeling of sexual power brought a smile to my lips. Let him stand there and stare and lust. I was still a little irritated with him for implying earlier that I had everything so easy.
“A girl like you…”
That was what he’d called me. As if I couldn’t possibly have known a moment of hurt in all my pretty, privileged life. I knew hurt. I was far more intimate with the feeling than I’d like to be.
“I made you mad today,” he said. “Didn’t I?”
I wasn’t in the mood to flirt and deny it. “Yes. You did.”
He sighed and raked a hand through his hair. “I didn’t mean to. I have a bad habit of saying all the wrong things to you, Cassidy.”
I pivoted to face him. “You’ve never called me that before.”
“What?”
“Cassidy.”
He shrugged. “That’s your full name, isn’t it?”
“Yes. Usually no one but my family ever uses it though.” I scanned the sky above. “There’s no moon tonight. My Uncle Chase can point out every constellation and every star. I never learned.”
He was now looking up too. “Neither did I.”
“Curtis?”
“Yeah?”
I took a deep breath. Something would happen here and now. I wanted it to happen. “I like that you called me by my full name,” I said softly.
&nb
sp; His voice was gruff, almost pained. “You’re too fucking beautiful.”
It started because I touched his hand. Just gently, tentatively, in the darkness.
Curtis sucked in a sharp breath and took a bolder step, circling both hands around my waist and turning me around so that my back was against his chest. He was all muscles and primitive male power. My body responded instantly, my breasts tingling, my breathing accelerating. But nothing could match the excruciating ache between my legs as his hands gripped my hips and then moved across my belly.
I moaned a little and pressed into him, wanting more, ready to beg for it. I hadn’t let anyone get this close to me in so long. Now I wondered how I’d managed to make do with only battery operated relief all this time. I wanted everything and I wanted it right now.
He knew. His hands traveled up to my breasts and I heard him groan a fevered curse when he realized I wasn’t wearing a bra. I pressed against him as he kneaded my breasts. He pushed himself against my back it and I felt him, what he needed. He could have it. The clothes we wore were such a nuisance. They were in our way and I wanted them gone. I wanted him to carry me to my room and do everything I’d been fantasizing about.
I gasped when he abruptly reached low, cupping between my legs. I didn’t have time to think about the fact that we were in the backyard or that my parents would be home soon. There was only the rough bristle of his jaw against my cheek and the fact that the straps of my nightie had already fallen when I reached my arms up and hooked them around his neck so I could arch my body against him more completely. His hands were working overtime to conduct a magnificent kind of torture between my legs and I was throbbing, aching, on fire as I strained against him.
“Yeah,” I breathed, moving in time to the stroke of his hand. “Yeah.”
All my inhibitions had fallen away with one touch. And Curtis obliged by getting his fingers inside my panties and then with an insanely delicious shock I realized they were inside of me. It was too much, too soon. I’d been thinking about him far too often and I’d gone without this feeling for far too long.
I broke, climaxing with his fingers deep inside of me, stifling my own cries of ecstasy while biting my lip as wave after agonizingly beautiful wave of pleasure rocked me. I nearly cried when Curtis finally pulled his hand away, hating the feel of him leaving me. I was ready for so much more. I was ready right now.
