by L. J. Fine
Adam’s expression grew dark as he leveled Paul with his gaze. It was eerily reminiscent of the fierce expression she had seen on Tyler’s face just as he obliterated his opponent in the ring the other night. From what she had seen of these brothers so far, Emma was willing to bet that Tyler’s ferocious skill as a fighter was a family trait. One not to be trifled with.
“And you know I’m not gonna let you hurt her.” The quiet rumble of Adam’s voice sent shivers down her spine and she prayed she was never on the receiving end of such a challenge. Obviously, Paul came to the same conclusions because he fished his keys out of his pocket and backed toward his truck.
Unfortunately, despite his moment of clarity, he was still a douche bag. “This doesn’t end here, Serano. One way or another, Ben’s gonna see things my way.”
As she watched him climb into his truck and start the engine, Emma had a moment to worry about whether he should be driving right now at all. Douche bag or not.
When she voiced her concern, Adam just shook his head. “He’ll be fine. He only lives about a mile down the road. Not too much traffic right now anyway.” He walked up to stand beside her. “The more important question right now is, are you okay?”
She let out a dry laugh. “Oh yeah, I’m just peachy.” When he just looked at her she continued. “Seriously, I’m fine.” Then on impulse, she went to her tiptoes and pulled him into a hug. “Thank you,” she whispered, the shakiness of her voice belying her statement that she was okay.
Tentatively, he hugged her back before he set her back away from him. “No problem. I’m just glad I happened by when I did.”
“Yeah, speaking of. How’d you manage to be Johnny on the Spot?” There were about a million other questions she wanted to ask him right about now. Questions like: who was Tim and what happened to him? How was Ben involved? But somehow that was the only one that came out.
Was it the poor lighting, or did she actually see a blush creep up onto his face? “I came to visit someone when I heard Paul yelling. Figured I’d better come see what he was doing, knowing that you were staying here.”
Ah, she should have known. Clearing her throat to combat the awkwardness, she said, “Well, thanks again. I really don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t shown up.”
Flipping to the right key on her key ring, she turned to open her door when he spoke up to stop her. “I don’t think it’s a good idea that you stay here tonight.”
Frowning, she turned to face him. “What? Why?”
“You heard the part about Paul only living a mile down the road, right?” The look he gave her suggested she had absolutely no common sense at all and she had to admit he had a point. Paul could come back.
She took a deep breath then blew it back out. “Right. Um, Chloe’s working tonight but I guess I could go hang out at the bookstore until she closes.”
It was Adam’s turn to sigh as he shook his head and dug his phone out of his pocket. “No, don’t do that. Come with me, you can hang at my place until Ben gets there.”
And that implied that she would be going home with Ben. “No, that plan doesn’t work. I can’t stay with Ben.”
“Why?” Adam looked up from his phone, brow lowered over his eyes.
Did she really have to tell him about this? Seemed she didn’t have any other choice. “Because Ben and I got into a fight this morning and I don’t think he wants to see me again. That’s why,” she said quickly, all in one breath to get it out faster.
Adam actually laughed. “Well, good luck trying to get him to let you stay somewhere else after he finds out what happened tonight.” She opened her mouth to protest but he cut her off. “Don’t worry about whatever it was you fought about this morning. I guarantee that it won’t matter in a few minutes. Go pack a bag. I’ll wait for you out here.”
“There’s no point in arguing with you, is there? Or trying to convince you not to call him?”
He flashed her a pearly white grin. “None.”
“Fine,” she said on a sigh. But before she turned to unlock her door, she had to ask. “What happened to Paul’s brother?”
That grin disappeared as quickly as he’d given it. “I’ll let Ben tell you about that when you see him,” he said lifting his phone to his ear, presumably to call his brother to tattle on her.
Chapter Eleven
“Where the hell is she?”
Emma had just been exiting the upstairs bathroom when she heard the front door to Adam’s house slam followed by Ben’s gruff inquiry as to her whereabouts. And he seemed distressed, which was a first. His usual languidly calm and centered voice was anxious and sounded almost harassed.
Why was he so upset? It wasn’t as if she actually meant something to him, she thought derisively.
“Well, hello to you too, brother,” Adam drily replied. From her vantage point at the top of the stairs, Emma couldn’t see them, but she could just imagine Adam’s sarcastic facial expression as he crossed his arms over his chest.
“Quit fucking around. Where is she?” Ben growled. The familiar sound had her shivering impulsively. She could just save them both the trouble by going downstairs and announcing her presence, but it kind of sounded like Adam might be gearing up for a lecture. This might be the only opportunity she got to hear what was actually going on, so she sat down on the top step and listened.
The soft jingle of a dog collar and the little grunts of a small pug caught her attention. The Captain, as Adam called him, nudged at her arm until she lifted it so he could crawl into her lap. He gave a contented snort as he settled down and she felt a smile split her lips.
That was, until she heard Adam speak. “Relax. She’s using the bathroom upstairs. She’s fine.”
Or, you know, instead of a lecture he could just tell Ben where she was and be done with it. Just as she was bracing herself for Ben’s appearance in the hallway, Adam spoke again.
“Are you serious about her?” The question had a small gasp escaping her lips and from the silence below stairs, it seemed it had caught Ben off guard as well. Though she was pretty sure she already knew the answer, she held her breath in anticipation of his response anyway.
But he replied with neither a positive nor a negative, just a, “Why do you care?”
Adam sighed. “Because if you are, you aren’t going to be able to brush off what happened to her tonight. You won’t be able to distract her from the questions that you and I both know are coming. And if you are serious about her, she deserves to know the truth.”
Well, that didn’t sound ominous or anything. Just what was this truth she deserved to know? And did she really want to know it? What if he did turn out to be some sort of a murderer? She didn’t know if she would be able to handle something like that. Then again, every instinct she possessed told her that, in his grief, Paul had been exaggerating the truth. Gruff and intimidating though he may be, Ben would never intentionally hurt someone. She believed that to her marrow.
“I’ll tell her the truth,” he said softly. “I’ll tell her whatever she wants to know.”
His words had her heart pounding in her chest. What did that mean? He was serious about her after all?
As she was wrapping her brain around that little nugget of knowledge, he turned the corner and appeared at the bottom of the stairs. He looked all disheveled with his short dark hair in disarray as though he had driven his fingers through it more than once. Not that the messy look didn’t work for him. God, anything he did worked for him, she thought with an inward groan, and that was part of her problem.
Their eyes connected and she could see the resignation in his dark stare. Immediately, she knew he was aware that she had heard them. Rather than seeming angry with her, his expression turned to one of immense relief.
“You okay, Sugar?” His low rumble vibrated up the stairs and into her body, the sound somehow comforting. Or maybe it was the vulnerability she saw on his face when he asked the question.
“Yeah, I’m good.” Her v
oice cracked so she cleared her throat and sat up a little straighter, careful not to jostle The Captain.
“You sure about that?” There went that hand running through his hair again, and was that her imagination or was it shaking just a little?
“I promise you, I’m okay.” She chewed on her bottom lip, debating whether or not she should continue. There was no getting around the inevitable, so she said, “But I think we need to talk.”
He nodded. “You’re right. We do.”
She was surprised when he started making his way up the stairs. She didn’t think that they would have this conversation here, figuring he would take her back to his place. But maybe it was better this way. She was a lot less likely to get distracted if Adam was just down the stairs.
Stopping on the step below her, he picked the pug up from her lap and set him down beside her. The Captain whined but stepped back when she took Ben’s outstretched hand and let him pull her to her feet. As they walked down the hall to what she was guessing was a spare bedroom, he kept her hand firmly in his. It was almost as if he were afraid she would bolt given the first opportunity.
Yeah right. She was way too desperate to hear what he had to say to take off right now.
He opened the door to the spare room and calmly shut it behind them while she went to take a seat on the bed. He didn’t move from the door, just leaned up against it, eyeing her warily and she again got the impression that this was a tactic to keep her here.
“Where do you wanna start?”
Sitting on the edge of the bed, she crossed her legs and hugged her middle. “How about you start at the beginning. Who was Tim?”
For a second he screwed his eyes tight and she knew this was the last thing in the world he wanted to talk about. Normally, just that look on his face would have her dropping it, but they needed to get this out. Knowing him, he probably hadn’t spoken to anyone about it since it happened and keeping something like this bottled up wasn’t healthy.
Opening his eyes, he slid his back down the door until his ass hit the floor. He propped his elbows up on his knees.
“Tim was my best friend, back in my hoodlum days.” The twinkle in his eyes when he looked at her had a small smile tugging at the corner of her lips. But that twinkle was short lived, as was her smile, when he continued. “Tim was also Paul’s little brother.” He sighed and ran that hand through his hair again. “Look, I’ll save you all the gritty details but I think you can guess by now that Tim and I used to get into a lot of trouble together.”
“Yeah, I gathered that.”
“It was a Saturday night and the two of us decided that we wanted to get wasted.” He shrugged. “Nothing really new there. That was a pretty normal Saturday or hell, weekend, for us. This particular night, we invited some girls over.” His gaze shot to her face then. To gauge her reaction? “Again, not new.”
Ah, yes. Definitely to gauge her reaction and despite the fact that this had happened however-long-ago before they had met, she felt an irritating pang of jealousy. So he hadn’t slept with as many women as she might think—his words—but he had still slept around. Shouldn’t be so surprising. Wanting him to continue, she didn’t give her irrational feelings a visible reaction. Instead, she just went with a nod and an “okay”.
“By this point the story does get new; we were so fucked up I don’t think any of us could see straight. I took one of the girls up to my room and left Tim downstairs with the other one. They were playing a video game or something. I honestly don’t remember. Fuck, I don’t even remember the girls’ names. We’d just met them when we were out the night before and I was so gone that they didn’t register.” His gaze shifted away from her then to focus on the wall behind her. She didn’t mind, just let him do what he needed to do to get it out.
“Apparently, while I was messing around upstairs, they ran out of alcohol. And Tim—” His voice broke and he cleared his throat. “Stupid fucking bastard,” he murmured shaking his head before he sniffed and wiped at the side of his face. He took a deep breath and got the rest out all in a rush. “Tim decided it would be a good idea to run down to the store and get some more liquor. The girl he was with didn’t see a problem with that plan and went with him. When I came back downstairs the fucker had taken my keys and my car was gone.”
Emma gasped then held her breath, already knowing where this story was going as dread and remorse formed a lump in her throat.
“He wrapped the car around a telephone pole, totaled it. Killed himself and the girl.”
“Oh God, Ben. That’s horrible, I’m so sorry.” The tortured look in his eyes made her want to get down on the floor with him and wrap her arms around him. The way he tensed up at her words, however, kept her right where she was.
“So that’s what happened to Tim.” He ran his hand down his face then rested his head back against the door to look at her through the slits of his eyes.
Uncertainty once again had her chewing on her bottom lip. “That’s tragic, Ben. It really is and I’m so sorry for your loss.”
He gave a bitter laugh. “You know, I think that’s the first time anyone’s said that to me. Outside of my brothers anyway.”
Confusion pulled her mouth into a frown. “That doesn’t even make sense. He was your best friend.”
“Yeah well.” He looked down at his hands. “Not a lot of sympathy when people blame you for your best friend’s death.”
Now that pissed her off. “I fail to see how any of that was your fault.”
Maybe it was her words, but she was pretty sure it was the sharp, confident tone with which she delivered them that had his eyes snapping to hers.
“I did tell you what people thought of me before that happened, right?”
“Yeah, so? It doesn’t change the fact that it wasn’t your fault.”
“So Tim was a few years younger than me. Everybody thought I was a bad influence on him.” He dropped his head. “Fuck, maybe I was,” he said softly.
She understood that he felt guilty, she really did. More than likely she would feel the same way. It’s a natural human emotion. But facts were facts and this wasn’t his fault.
“Ben, you didn’t put the keys in his hand. Hell, you weren’t even in the room when he made the decision to leave. You said yourself that this was a typical night for you. You had no way of knowing what he would do.”
“I was still the one that got him so fucked up in the first place, Emma. It was still my car that he took. So, nice as that sentiment is, none of that matters. Not to me, or the people in this town. And especially not to Paul.”
Emma felt her eyes narrow at that asshole’s name. “Okay. Let’s talk about Paul for a minute. He’s such a concerned big brother now, but where the hell was he when all this went down? If you were such a bad influence on Tim, why didn’t Paul intervene? Did he even try?”
A deep frown line formed down the center of Ben’s forehead. “Not really, actually. Paul kind of ignored Tim. Especially when he started getting into trouble on a regular basis. I think he was embarrassed by him.”
The impulse to roll her eyes was so strong she couldn’t repress it. “I’m sure he was such a model citizen even back then. I’ve met the douche bag twice and both times he was thoroughly shit-faced. And let’s not forget the last time I saw him he attacked me in a dark parking lot. Oh, what a great guy.”
Ben’s eyes visibly darkened and his next words came out on a low growl. “That cocksucker better hope I don’t run into him anytime soon. It’s different when he comes at me like that. But you?” He shook his head, the muscle in his jaw getting a workout. The menace in his eyes right then would have been frightening if his words hadn’t triggered something very important.
“Wait. When he comes at you? He’s gone after you before? I mean, aside from just verbally?”
He shot her a level look. “Baby, he blames me for the death of his little brother. Of course he’s come after me before.”
The fact that retaliation for hur
ting a loved one was a given to him was proof positive that Ben wasn’t nearly as worthless as he thought he was. In fact, his worth as a human being was pretty damn immeasurable. But the fact that he felt he deserved that retaliation for something he didn’t do was intolerable.
Then, she didn’t know why, but yet another dot connected in her brain. “That scar on your side. That’s not from falling out of a tree, is it?”
There was a pregnant pause as he shifted his ass uncomfortably against the door. “No, it’s not.” Three simple words. No elaboration or explanation.
“What was it, then? Paul?” Suddenly she was desperate for an answer and knew she wouldn’t drop it, even if he pressed her to.
“Yeah, it was Paul,” he said on a weary sigh. “It was a few months after the accident. Fucker got me with a knife before I knew he was there.”
“Jesus,” she breathed, the exclamation coming out before she could stop herself. She had a moment of shock and mournfulness for all he had been through, before those feelings slid right on down into fury and outrage on his behalf.
“That. Is such. Bullshit.” Her tone was nothing if not emphatic.
The corners of his lips twitched and something akin to tender amusement lit his eyes. “Don’t worry, Sugar. I survived.”
She rolled her eyes again. “Well, let’s all give Paul a fucking medal for being citizen of the year. It’s ridiculous the way these people treat you, Ben. You don’t deserve it. Especially shit like that.” She threw a pointed look to his covered abdomen.
Licking his lips, he shook his head. “But I do, Emma. I really do.” Pushing the fingers of both hands through his hair, he tilted his head down to cradle his forehead in his palms.
Okay. That despondent tone in his voice was it. Abandoning her perch on the edge of the bed, she got down on to her knees in front of him and pulled his hands away from his face. Taking his face in her hands, she forced his gaze to lock with hers. “You. Did not. Kill. Tim.”
