by Ines Saint
On Monday, they ran into a huge snag. The kids and their parents were devastated, but many of the parents wouldn’t allow their kids to be interviewed or seen on TV. It took Marissa only a moment to understand why, and an hour to get over feeling like an idiot. The families whose legal status in the country was questionable didn’t want to call attention to their children. Performing far away in a fair was one thing, but being interviewed and photographed by local media outlets was quite another.
“I feel like the nation’s dumbest ELL teacher,” Marissa said when the staff gathered behind closed doors. “I was picturing their inspirational story moving people into donating, but they’re right to be wary.”
Johnny scrubbed his face. “You’re not alone. But let’s try not to beat ourselves up. We leave politics at the door here, and so we forget, but there’s another world outside these walls.”
“We can still hold the musical at Star Springs Park, we’ll just need to promote it by word of mouth,” Amy said.
Friday rolled around and they had a full house. Or rather, a full park. The kids were fantastic. They’d grown not only in their language skills, but in their confidence. They received a standing ovation.
But the donations had been counted, and it still wasn’t enough. They were four thousand, six hundred dollars short. What else could she do? There was only one thing more she could think of...
Amy went on to the stage then, and the smile on her face was so big, it gave Marissa pause. “We have an announcement to make. Thanks to all your donations, and two very generous, anonymous donations, we’ve met our goal!”
A loud, screeching whoop went out, and it took Marissa a moment to notice it had come from her own mouth. Everyone turned to look her way, but for once, Marissa didn’t care that all eyes were on her. Then everyone began shouting, yelling, and jumping, and Marissa ran around hugging everyone she could find, whether she knew them or not. In five days, they’d be on their way!
Johnny found her then, and he picked her up and spun her around in circles. Marissa laughed. “We did it!” he shouted. Something had shifted between her and Johnny ever since the wedding. But right now, they were happy and free.
Until a voice called to them from a distance. “Hey, put my fiancée down,” Brian shouted, his tone friendly. But Johnny immediately set her down.
“I’m sorry I’m late. I left as soon as I could. I gather you have good news?” Brian looked down at her. His eyes were shining so bright, and he looked so happy and relieved. Marissa nodded. “Will I meet the kids today?”
Marissa nodded again and led him over to where the kids were. The excited chatter stopped and they all eyed Brian, looks of intense curiosity in their eyes. “Hey, kids, this is Brian. Brian, these are the kids!” Marissa forced a smile. She felt like a game show hostess. Brian smiled and shook hands and said all the right things, but he wasn’t really interested in getting to know the kids . . . and the kids knew it. Marissa saw it all.
Her two worlds had collided, but they didn’t fit. They never would.
The introductions and pleasantries were over with, and everyone knew there was nothing much to say. Amy and her husband, Frank, greeted Brian, and they spoke for a while about this and that. Chitchat. Small talk. Brian looked over at her, said, “Well,” and Marissa knew it was over. That was usually the signal between couples, to say it was time to go. She did it, too, whenever she was with Brian’s friends and coworkers.
“This is the last time I have to drive down.” Brian kissed her head as he began leading her away. “We’ll be moving into our new home next Sunday, and I’ll always be here for you.”
“Did you like the kids?”
“Yeah, they’re great. You can tell they’re enjoying themselves.”
Marissa looked down at the ground as they walked. “You did seem really happy we met our goal.”
“Of course I am, Marissa.” He stopped and made her look up at him. There was a questioning look in his eyes. “When people truly want something, they make it happen. I never doubted you would reach your goal. You know that, right? I knew you’d find a way.” His gaze was earnest and sincere, as if he needed her to understand.
Johnny was searching the crowd for his brothers when he caught a charged, tender moment between Brian and Marissa. The loaded moment knocked him off guard. Feeling someone’s eyes on him, he looked up and locked gazes with Amy, who gave him a soft, sad smile that told him she knew.
His mom’s voice interrupted the moment and Johnny was grateful. He needed some tough love, and his mom dished it out better than most. “I enjoyed that very much, Johnny,” his mom said, then sighed a little sigh.
“Then why do you sound so disappointed?”
“I’m not. I’m proud. I just see how it’s going to be. This is the life you want . . .”
Johnny hooked his arm around her shoulder and smiled despite himself. “But it’s not the life you wanted for me,” he finished.
His mom adjusted his arm so it wouldn’t mess up her hair, but she didn’t remove it. “Of course not. But it helps to be able to share in, and enjoy your work. It happens once in a while with Sam, too. I wanted him to be a big-shot architect. He has it in him, you know. But he wanted to stay here and save the town, thirty-four houses at a time.” Another sigh. “When I see his houses, though, I feel more at peace with his choices.”
“So you felt at peace with my choice tonight?”
Marianne shrugged and he knew she was close to coming to terms with it. But a moment later, she frowned and said, “Here comes Marty. He and his family always take you away from me.”
Johnny laughed at that. His mom used to always say that about any family that invited him or Sam anywhere. He hadn’t heard it in a while. But he thought of the look he’d caught between Marissa and Brian again. “No one can take anyone away from you. If someone doesn’t want to be with you, it’s their choice, and you have to accept it.” His mom looked up, surprised, and Johnny realized what he’d said. He felt his own eyes widen.
He wasn’t talking about them, but the words fit. Sam and Johnny had never liked being at home because Dan didn’t feel welcome there by their mom. The three of them spent their days running all over town, getting up to fun, and sometimes, no good. But he hadn’t meant to hurt his mom’s feelings.
Marty reached them then, and Marianne put on her indifferent face.
“Congratulations, man. You guys reached your goal.” He slapped Johnny’s arm. “And the kids are awesome. They did a great job. It makes me wish I was going with you all.”
Marianne raised an eyebrow. “You’d like to be stuck on a bus with thirty-something teenagers and their raging hormones for days on end?”
Marty laughed. “When you put it that way . . .” He looked at Johnny again then, and his laughter died away. “Listen, I, uh, I don’t mean to be a jerk, but the party for Marissa and Brian is in a week and I haven’t heard from either of you”—his gaze flickered to Marianne before settling on Johnny again—“or your brothers. It’s pretty casual, but I’m knee-deep in it now and I need a head count.”
“I can’t speak for my brothers, but I’m not going.” Johnny looked him in the eye. No more beating around the bush or softening blows. Marty and Marissa had taught him that. So if the truth made Marty uncomfortable, so be it. “It would be too hard.”
Marty nodded and his eyes flickered from Marianne to Johnny. “Hey, I understand. And if you, uh, ever want to talk about it . . .”
Johnny grinned. “Seriously?”
“Yeah.” Marty smiled, too, and then shook his head and left.
Marianne frowned. “What am I missing?” she asked, but Johnny began to walk away. “Is there something going on besides your pitiful salary, the godforsaken house, and the bus trip from hell?” she asked, trailing after him. “Johnny!”
Johnny stopped. He wasn’t in the mood for a tirade. But when he turned to tell his mom he had to go, the look he saw on her face wasn’t what he expected. She looked vul
nerable and open. “I heard what you said.”
“I said a lot of things . . .”
“About you and Sam choosing not to be with me.” It wasn’t exactly what he’d said, and it wasn’t what he’d meant at the moment, but the way she’d interpreted it was true enough. “I’ve always considered myself a good mom, but I guess if my own sons didn’t even want to be at home . . .”
Johnny swallowed a sigh. Here came the guilt trip. But his mother must’ve seen it in his face because she said, “No, let me finish.” She licked her lips. “I must’ve been doing something wrong if you didn’t want to be at home. And I know what it is. I know you didn’t like that Dan and I couldn’t get along.”
Johnny looked around. Star Springs Park was full. People were laughing and chatting all around them, and this was where his mom finally wanted to have this conversation? “That’s one way of putting it.”
Marianne’s throat worked. “Did you see how he and Holly seated me up front at the wedding and reception? Part of me wonders if he did it to show you and Sam he’s the better person, but lately, part of me wonders if—if maybe now he is the better person.” She drew in a long breath and put a hand to her chest. “I just can’t help how I feel. I’ve never been able to help it. It’s in here.” She pressed her fingers to her chest.
“Maybe not. But you can help how you act, and you can control the words that come out of your mouth.” A lesson Johnny was only fully learning now himself.
Marianne looked away, and Johnny felt as if he were in the twilight zone. “Is Dan the reason you chose to become a school psychologist?” she asked, her voice lifeless.
Not entirely. But he was a huge part of the equation. Him and Ana Maria . . . “Everything that happened at home is a part of it. But I’m sorry, Mom. I can’t do this right now. I need to go congratulate the kids. They’re having their moment.”
He squeezed her arm to show her he was glad she was finally trying to think things through, but he wasn’t going to stay to try to make her feel better. It was no longer his job to defuse difficult situations. It never should have been in the first place.
Brian squeezed Marissa’s hands. “I need to change. Do you want to meet back at your house when you’re done here?”
Marissa nodded. Brian left and she began to make her way back to the celebrating kids when a frazzled Amy stopped her. “We need to talk,” she said, before pacing this way and that. “You swore me to secrecy, Johnny swore me to secrecy. Too much secrecy! But it’s not fair. I shouldn’t be the only one to know. Johnny needs to know, you need to know—”
“Amy. Stop.” Marissa put her hands on her friend’s shoulders to stop her incessant pacing. “What do I need to know?”
Later that evening, Marissa was the one who was pacing. Brian watched her from the porch wing. He did not look happy. “Johnny’s always been a dumbass.”
Marissa started at him. “I don’t get it. Why are you so mad?”
“We’re supposed to sign a lease on a house tomorrow, but now you want to gather this loco brigade to go to his house and help fix it up.”
“It’s the right thing to do. Can’t you see that?”
“What a pair the two of you would make,” he grumbled.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You don’t think I see the way he looks at you?”
Marissa remained silent.
Brian set his mouth in a hard line. “I’ve never been the jealous type. And so far, you haven’t given me cause. But now you’re acting like he’s some kind of saint, when all he’s doing is being the same impulsive and irresponsible kid he’s always been.”
“How can you say that? He donated three thousand six hundred dollars! Because of him, the kids get to go on the trip. And he did it anonymously. He didn’t even want the credit.”
“And you’re the second anonymous donator. You gave them the thousand you had left in your savings, didn’t you?”
Marissa stopped pacing and lifted her chin defiantly. “Yes.”
Brian scrubbed his face. “Don’t look at me like that. I’m not saying you were wrong. I get to spend money on things I like and you get to spend money on things you like. That’s fine. It’s why we both contribute to a joint account, to save for a down payment and take care of the things we need to care of together.” He shook his head. “But if you hadn’t been contributing to our joint account, you would’ve donated more. Like Johnny did. He doesn’t think. What happens when he gets married and has the house full of kids he’s always talked about? Is he going to have them living in a moldy shack with a pack of dogs ’cause he can’t say no to anyone in need?”
Marissa stared. “I still don’t see why you’re so mad.”
He sighed. “I’m not mad, and I’m not saying he’s a bad person. Obviously, he isn’t. But he doesn’t think ahead. He never has. Can’t you see that? And he’s a bad influence on you. The two of you would run yourselves to the ground if nobody stopped you, and cheer each other on while doing it.”
Marissa breathed in a painful breath. She didn’t want to hurt him, didn’t even know where to start. “You and I . . . we’re not getting each other anymore, Brian,” she said in a strangled voice.
Brian stopped pacing and closed his eyes a moment before opening them and looking around. “This is killing us. All of it. The distance, your living situation, the endless things we need to take care of... I’m so friggin’ tired of it all.” He sighed and shook his head. “I can’t do this right now, Marissa. Let’s pick this up tomorrow, after we’ve both had some rest.”
Marissa gulped and nodded.
Chapter 17
Sam, Cassie, and Marissa met at Amador Construction later that night, where Marissa explained what Johnny had done. She hoped Johnny wouldn’t get mad at her, but she needed help figuring out what to do. Sam shook his head. “I’m not surprised.”
Cassie sent him a knowing look. “Like you didn’t know it was him the moment they said ‘anonymous donor.’”
“I guess I did.” Sam sighed.
Cassie turned to Marissa. “You don’t have to feel bad, though. You know Johnny. It’ll mean a lot to him that he was able to do it, and he’ll never regret it.”
“I know, but I have an idea of how to make it up to him. Something that’ll be great for everyone involved,” Marissa explained. “But I need your help.”
Cassie’s sky-blue eyes took on a new glow. “We’re in! Tell us the plan.”
Sam looked up the ceiling, as if asking heaven to help him, and Marissa bit her lip. “First, I need to know what Johnny was planning on doing with the money.”
“He was going to buy paint and quartz countertops for the kitchen. I guess now he’ll have to take leftover paint from other projects and use cheaper countertops.” He looked Marissa in the eye then. “I’d buy him the quartz, you know, but I can tell you right now he won’t accept it. He can be real stubborn.”
Marissa’s eyes flitted over to Cassie and the two women shared a secret smile. Everyone knew the main thing all Amadors had in common was how stubborn they were. A memory of Jacob Amador came to Marissa then, and a new idea popped into her head . . . but she’d have to ask Johnny how he felt about it.
Sam led them out back to a big barn, where he kept everything he salvaged from the construction sites he worked on. He flipped a switch and glaring, fluorescent lights made them all wince. “Ta-da!” Cassie exclaimed.
Marissa smiled at her. Picking through everything with Cassie was going to be fun. “What paint colors did he want?” Cassie asked Sam.
Sam thought about it for a moment. “He mentioned yellow for the outside, but that’s all he’s said on the subject.”
“Yellow . . .” Marissa smiled and picked her way over to the paint to get a closer look. “That’s my favorite color!” Each container had an identifying spot of paint up top. “This one,” she exclaimed, when a happy, sunny yellow caught her eye. “It will look so pretty with the red roof, and the house will really
stand out against the blue sky and all the greenery . . .” But then all the arguments she and Brian had had over houses came to mind. “But that’s presumptuous of me. He might hate it. It’s his house, of course he should pick it out himself.”
“But then it wouldn’t be a surprise,” Cassie reasoned. “And Johnny’s not picky. He always leaves that stuff up to Sam when they work on houses.”
Sam nodded. “How about you pick everything out, including color for the all the trim and interior walls, and I’ll let you know if I think he’d approve. Cassie and I have some contracts to go through, and we’ll be in the office for a while. Come get us when you’re done gathering everything and I’ll load it up.”
“That sounds like a plan.” Marissa beamed at them, then took another look around. “And I have another idea. Johnny would have to approve, but if you don’t mind, can I pick out some of those, too?” she asked, pointing to a pile in a corner.
Sam looked at her for a moment, as if he was trying to figure out what she was up to, but he shrugged and said, “Sure. Help yourself.”
Marissa dove in. Every once in a while, she’d look out and up to the house, to make sure Cassie and Sam were still there. She could see them sitting at a conference table, their heads bent over it. Once she caught them gazing into each other’s eyes, and twice she caught them kissing, and she’d quickly ducked back in. It seemed they were well-entertained and she wasn’t imposing on them by taking so long.
It had dawned on her early on that picking out colors and special ideas for Johnny’s imperfect house was a lot more enjoyable than looking for the perfect house with Brian. She knew, deep down, that Johnny would love the idea she had for the countertops, and it filled her with anticipation that bordered on something she couldn’t yet allow herself to examine too closely. Not until she was on the other side of the Mosaic Fair.
