by Shayla Black
Still, according to Gus, her brother was trying to move on. Holland liked Augustine Spencer. She was wild and smart and larger than life. She also worked at the White House and had been close to Joy. The three had formed a special friendship, and she still cherished the time Gus spent in New Orleans.
“Maybe the captain simply took the assignment to be close to his mother for a while,” Holland suggested. “I know this mess has been hard on her.”
Gus had offered to turn down the job with the Hayes administration and Dax had offered to leave the Navy, but Judith Spencer had insisted her children continue with their lives. Their mother had been adamant. Still, Holland checked in on her from time to time. She had to be lonely in that huge house.
“I don’t buy it.” Jim shook his head. “He’s been in the Gulf for six months. Lots of action there.”
“Maybe he’s ready for a change.” Holland shrugged.
“Does Captain Spencer strike you as a desk-job sort of man?”
She frowned and bit her lip.
“You know I’m right. He’s not a man who likes peace and quiet. And he didn’t choose a New Orleans training post for the gumbo.”
“You think he’s here to try to get the case reopened?” She really hoped not.
“I think he’s a son who loved his father and can’t handle knowing that the man who raised him wasn’t who he thought. I wouldn’t want to believe it of my own father. It’s got to be doubly hard on a man like the captain, who’s used to getting his way. All that money must have made his life pretty cushy up until now.”
In an instant, Holland remembered him, so handsome and earnest, that day in the library.
Do you know what I like about the Navy? I’m not royalty there. No one gives a crap that my family has money. No one cares what my last name is. I work hard and I’ll continue to do so.
At the time she’d thought he was naive. Having worked NCIS for the last few years, she’d figured out that for all of the captain’s connections, his father had been as much of a negative as a positive. He’d had to work twice as hard to prove he wasn’t moving up the ranks due to nepotism. During the war, he’d served his country valiantly in the Persian Gulf. She’d read reports of his bravery and knew he’d earned his captaincy.
“The Spencer I knew was a hard worker despite the fact that he could have coasted through,” she argued. “He’s honest and loyal. Just because he’s rich doesn’t make him soft. He’s a good man, and you should treat him with respect when he shows up.”
“I’m glad to hear you say that, Holland.”
She stopped, her focus narrowing to that deep voice dredged up from the depths of her memory. Dax Spencer had the sexiest accent, having been raised right here in New Orleans. His father had been career Navy, but Judith Spencer had insisted on a somewhat normal childhood for Dax and Gus. They spent time with their father, but also lived in a big mansion in the Garden District. Dax had gone off to Creighton Academy at the age of twelve, but he’d never lost that thick, molasses-rich NOLA drawl. When he spoke, his tones deep and dark, it did something to Holland she couldn’t explain.
“Speak of the devil. You could have knocked, Captain Spencer.” She turned, and the sight of him was like a punch to the solar plexus. She breathed through the reaction, trying to hide the fact that being this close to him already had her heart pounding.
Damn, but he looked good. The years had been kind to him, turning a beautiful boy into a gorgeous, powerful man. He filled out his khakis in a way most sailors couldn’t. Tall and broad and powerfully built, he was a glorious hunk of masculinity.
He gave her a lopsided grin that threatened to stop her heart. “I didn’t want to interrupt.”
Jim had gone a nice shade of red. “Captain Spencer, it’s good to see you again.”
Dax didn’t seem fazed at all that he’d overheard them talking about him, but then he was likely used to it. He simply gave Jim a friendly grin. “Now I’m absolutely sure that’s a lie. I’m sure I was a pain in the ass and the last couple of months without me have likely been pleasant. How about I promise to be respectful this time around. I wasn’t in a good place the last time we talked.”
“That’s understandable,” Jim allowed, holding out a hand. “Let me know if I can help you, and welcome back to New Orleans.”
Dax shook his hand with a nod. “Thank you, Agent Kellison. I promise I’m not going to make your life hell.” Jim left with a friendly wave, and Dax turned his attention to Holland. “I called him a lowlife cocksucker who deserved to have his entrails eaten by a gator. I might have been in a bad mood at the time.”
“It seems so.” Why did she sound so breathy? She wasn’t the vampy type.
“You look good, Holland,” he said. “Did I ever thank you for coming to my father’s funeral?”
She shot him a startled glance. “I didn’t realize you’d seen me there.”
“Sweetheart, there were so few people I couldn’t have missed you. I truly appreciate it. I know my momma and Gus did as well.”
As Holland’s heart continued to race, she thanked goodness the office door stood open and she could see people moving out in the hallway. She wasn’t sure she could handle being alone with him, knowing the last time she had been she’d kissed him. The press of their bodies and lips had been the single most erotic moment of her life. She’d slept with men and not felt as close to them as she had to Dax Spencer in that one moment.
Sometimes she could still feel the way his tongue had moved against hers, sliding in a silky dance. She could feel his hands on her body. He’d been subtle, but she’d felt the possession in his grip. If Admiral Spencer and Constance Hayes hadn’t barged in, she’d likely have found herself on top of that desk with her legs spread and clinging to Dax Spencer as he drove into her.
“Why are you here, Captain?”
“Can’t you call me Dax? You have dinner with my mother twice a month. You see my sister every time she’s in town. Can’t we at least be on a first-name basis?”
Her reticence sounded ridiculous when he put it that way. They actually did run in the same small circle. She simply avoided him at all costs and had since the moment she realized she wanted him in a way she’d never wanted any man. “All right. Dax, welcome back to New Orleans. What are you doing here?”
He cast her a sidelong glance. “Well, Holland. I’m in the Navy and I was recently stationed at the Joint Reserve Base New Orleans in a training capacity. I’ve been involved in new training methods on modern ships.”
“Yes, because Captain Awesome really wants to spend a month writing training manuals.” That was the moniker the sailors had given him after his wartime bravery. He’d been creative and smart and he’d stood by his men. They loved him. They would lay their lives on the line for him. He was everything the Navy looked for in a captain.
Dax’s eyes widened in surprise. “Captain Awesome? Are you serious?”
As a heart attack. “It’s what everyone calls you. After what you did in Operation Iraqi Freedom, can you doubt it?” In the middle of unexpected enemy fire, he had devised and implemented a battle plan on the fly. He’d used his ship in a way that had shortened the skirmish and saved lives.
His gorgeous mouth turned down. “That was supposed to be classified.”
He wasn’t that naive. “Nothing that cool is classified, Captain. Dax.”
“Captain Awesome might be the worst call sign I’ve ever heard.” He shook his head woefully. “I’m back in New Orleans because I was asked to spend the month providing insight on the new training procedures. Since I implemented them on my ship, I decided to help out.”
She didn’t believe that for a second. “And that’s the only reason you’re here?”
He sent her an unreadable smile. “I have some other things to accomplish while I’m here.”
“You want us to look into your father’s case again.” Nothing else made sense to her.
“I’m
here for numerous reasons. One, my mother’s birthday is soon. Two, Gus is taking a little time off. So I came to be with my family. After everything that happened, family is my priority.”
She understood. “I’m glad. I think your mom is lonely. I’m pretty sure Gus isn’t.”
Dax shuddered, proving he’d heard about Gus’s proclivities. “I do not need to know what my sister is doing. Or who. I came back to make sure my mother is all right . . . and to take care of a few other loose ends.”
Finally they were getting to the point. “Did you come to see Jim or Bill?”
His eyes pinned her. “I came to see you, sweetheart.”
Damn, but she was in trouble. “Why? I can’t help you.”
“Oh, I think you can. Holland, have dinner with me. Give me a chance.”
She shook her head because even if the Spencer name wasn’t as shiny as it had once been, they still came from different worlds. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
Besides, Holland wasn’t entirely sure what he was after. He might be asking for her to reopen his father’s case. Or he might be asking her for a date. Either would be a bad freaking idea.
“Holland, listen. Please. You’re the only one who might give me a shot, the only one who might hear what I have to say.” His jaw hardened to a stubborn line. “Have dinner with me. Let me plead my case.”
“Or?” There was always an “or” in these types of conversations.
“I spend the rest of my life knowing I didn’t do everything I could to honor my father.”
Shit. What was she supposed to do with that plea? He’d given her the one argument that guaranteed she wouldn’t turn him away. “All right. My place. Eight o’clock. Don’t be late.”
He flashed dimples, sending her into a tailspin. “I’ll bring the wine.”
He turned and strode out, leaving her watching his amazingly hot backside and wondering what the hell she’d agreed to. She’d known she couldn’t handle him when he’d done his best to persuade her to give him a shot during Joy and Zack’s reception years ago. Not much had changed. Besides, she’d wanted a career of her own then. She still did. Certainly, she didn’t want to be like her mother, following her father from base to base, always having to make new friends and find a way to fit in. If she’d allowed herself to date Spencer back then, she would be his wife now and she would have had his children, watching him as he rose through the ranks and left her further and further behind.
She wanted more for herself.
Yes, she was stronger now. More mature. She’d had more experience with the opposite sex. Could she handle him? Ready or not, it seemed she was going to find out.
TWO
Dax tried not to stare at Holland as she set a steaming plate in front of him. He was so hungry. Not for the food. Oh, it smelled delicious and he wasn’t surprised that, despite being a tough NCIS investigator, she could also produce what looked like a gourmet meal. Holland Kirk was the kind of woman who would master anything she put her mind to.
Yeah, he wanted the food, but he craved her far more. She was still the most beautiful woman to him. Her blond hair cascaded around her shoulders in waves. When he’d seen her earlier, she’d had it tucked up in a tidy bun that matched her neat but utilitarian clothes. But when she’d opened the door to him not fifteen minutes earlier, she’d looked so pretty and feminine in jeans and a pink shirt that hugged her slender curves.
Years, miles, war, and death stood between their kiss in the library and now. He’d never gotten this woman out of his head.
“This looks amazing. Thank you. You have no idea how long it’s been since someone cooked for me. Well, someone who didn’t learn his skills from the Navy,” Dax admitted. Captaining his own ship had its privileges, but made-from-scratch Cajun food wasn’t one of them.
She sat across from him and lifted her wineglass with an elegant hand. “My mother was a good cook, but after she passed, my dad was still at sea. So I ended up here in New Orleans with my uncle. Now, that man can cook. This is his gumbo recipe. Sorry it’s nothing more exciting.”
“This is the most excitement I’ve had in a while, Holland.” He took a spoonful. The dish was perfectly made with just the right bite of heat. “It’s excellent. And I really do thank you for hearing me out.”
He was going to do his damnedest to be polite with her. He needed her on his side. If this investigation wasn’t between them, he would have walked into her office and finished what they’d started almost seven years before.
The only times he’d seen her since that kiss had all been at funerals. First Zack’s mother had perished in a car accident about a year after the wedding. He’d glimpsed Holland there from a distance. She’d certainly been at Joy’s funeral, but that had been a clusterfuck. So many reporters, so many people mourning the woman who would have been first lady. Then Holland had attended his father’s services. Even though Dax had viewed the whole thing through a filter of disbelief and rage, the one sweet moment had been when he’d scanned the sparsely attended event and seen her sitting in the back pew, silently honoring his father.
Besides his family and best friends, she’d been the only person he knew to show up. Everyone else had run from the scandal and abandoned the Spencer family during their time of tragedy.
Now she was his only hope of seeing any kind of justice done. He’d spent the last week before his return to New Orleans plotting and planning ways to persuade her to do what he needed. He couldn’t get emotional no matter how much she moved him.
“You can’t behave the way you did before,” Holland said, her mouth turned down. “My coworkers gave you a pass because they knew you were hurting. They won’t do it again.”
He’d been a righteous prick and a pain in the ass. He’d battled with anyone who got in his way. NCIS had definitely seemed like one obstacle after another. “I understand. I was running on emotion at the time. I’ve cooled off and I’m coming at the problem logically now.”
Well, with as much logic as he could. It wasn’t easy watching others sling mud and tarnish his father’s reputation. Hell, they’d ripped a dead man to shreds and fed what had been left of his good name to the dogs of the press.
“You’ve been conducting your own investigation?” Holland asked, passing him the cornbread.
He accepted it gratefully. He hadn’t been joking about his last decent meal. It had been months ago, right before Joy Hayes had died. He and the other Perfect Gentlemen had come together for Labor Day in the Hamptons. They’d had a cookout and laughed and joked around about what perverted things they would all do in the White House once Zack was elected.
That had been less than a year ago. Why did he feel a decade older now?
“I hired a couple of private investigators and had some friends look into a few things for me.” It didn’t hurt that his best friend was an analyst with the Central Intelligence Agency. Though Gabe and Mad thought Connor was in deeper than that. Dax often wondered if they were right. “They found some information I thought was disturbing.”
“Do you think Jim and Bill didn’t do their jobs?”
She asked the question politely, her voice soft, but Dax knew a landmine when he heard one.
He shook his head. “I think NCIS did the best they could with the information and resources available at the time. No one was ready for the way the story exploded in the press.”
“No, we weren’t. Any media relations training we have is cursory. I think even the feds would have had trouble with a story of that magnitude,” she admitted. “Normally it would have lasted one news cycle and been over.”
“My father wasn’t news for what he did but because I’m his son and I have powerful friends.” Guilt still twisted his gut over that fact.
Holland was correct. The news would definitely have run the story about the admiral’s disgrace, but the tabloids wouldn’t have covered it. His father hadn’t been a rock star or a celebrity. He’d been old sch
ool money serving in a position of prestige.
Dax was the celebrity. It didn’t matter how hard he tried to stay out of the press, the media associated him with two of the most self-avowed playboys of the Western world, along with the White House chief of staff and the president of the United States. Somehow, Connor managed to duck the news coverage. Probably because he never allowed anyone to take a full-frontal picture of him. And the CIA kept him out of the public eye. Being dragged into the news had never bothered Dax much. It had been fine. He was used to it. But his parents had not been.
“I wish I could have kept them off the story. We tried to keep it quiet.” She reached out, her hand almost touching his before she abruptly pulled back.
Damn it. He wanted her hand in his, wanted any touch she would give him. It had been so long since he’d felt any kind of affection for a woman. From a woman. “I know. They were always
