I’m going down that same road. I rub my hands over my face again at the realization.
Blake stares at me for a second before he grabs the Gatorade and dumps it.
“No more.”
I nod.
“You need to finish what we started last night. Maisy is still sleeping. It’s just us.”
I sigh. He’s right.
“Here,” he says and hands me a cup of coffee.
“Cheers to day one of being sober,” I chuckle.
“It’s not funny. Now start fucking talking.”
I take a deep breath and exhale slowly before telling Blake my truth. I’ve never really said it out loud. Saying it makes it more real.
“My home life has been shit since I can remember. My saving grace was football and it was my ticket out of my house. I knew Rowen would kick me out the second I committed to Cambria. He’s a Georgia Bulldog and we were all expected to be as well. So when I told him I wasn’t going to Georgia he flipped on me and told me that I wasn’t his son. I think I told you that last night though.”
He nods. “Not the part about school. That’s fucked up. So, who’s your dad?”
“I don’t know. Some guy my mama knew from high school I guess. No one knows.”
“Bro…” he trails off, not knowing what to say that. Can’t blame him. So I continue.
“I’ve never gone back since then night I left Peachberry Park. Rollie got me drunk and high for the time and the pain sort of floated away. I’ve stayed that way ever since. It was just easier than feeling anything at all.”
“What about the girl? Stanzy.”
“Stanzy, was my high school girlfriend. I don’t know exactly why Tori flipped the fuck out. She cheated on me last year and we broke up. Guess she’s upset about that.”
“Tori is a shit show. You’re better off. Continue with this Stanzy person because there’s more.”
Damn it, he knows me too well. I inhale and exhale a deep breath. Just say it.
“She was my best friend growing up. My dad would beat us kids when he got drunk and I’d run to Stanzy’s house. She’d hold me until I fell asleep because Rowen would never let our mother do that. After a few years, she became what you saw at the party.”
“A fucking hot piece of ass?”
I glare at him.
“Sorry, sorry. I’m working on it. I meant she’s beautiful.”
He really is trying to be a better person and it makes me chuckle at how he backtracked so quickly. He really turned a corner when he got back from Cali with Maisy. Well done, Maisy.
“Yeah, she is. She always was, but she was my best friend too and it was weird. I pushed her away in high school before I got my shit together and asked her out. We were together all of senior year and I lost my virginity to her.”
“You lost your virginity at eighteen?”
“That was your takeaway?”
“Well, no, that’s fine, but with how much you fuck around here I thought you’d have lost your v-card when you were like twelve.”
“Actually, that’s another thing,” I pause, wondering if I should tell him my reputation is a lie. Fuck it, we’re out of here in a few shorts weeks and I’m off to Minnesota. “Tori is the only person I’ve fucked on this campus. It’s why I was so pissed she cheated on me and won’t give her another chance. She took something from me and I can’t get that back now.”
“Wait, what?” he asks, stopping to think. “But I’ve seen you with chicks draped all over you, on the couch, you’ve taken chicks to The Office.”
“Did you ever see me with my dick out?”
He thinks about my question. “Fuck, no. There was serious dry humping on that couch though.” He juts his chin toward my favorite spot on our sectional.
“True, but there was no fucking. A lot of blowies and a lot of fingering, but zero sex.”
“Holy shit. You’re a master manipulator. How the fuck did you fool all of us?”
“I don’t know. I did the same thing in high school so the guys in the locker room wouldn’t know I was a virgin and give me hell for it. For some reason, girls just want to say they fucked a football player and I just didn’t deny it.”
Blake is dumbfounded. “The player plays by his own fucking rules. Wow… Just wow.”
I smile because Blake is rarely speechless and I’m grateful he’s not overacting by the news.
“So you fucked Tori after all those years. Why?”
“Stanzy moved on. You saw the rock and the douche who gave it to her. I guess a small piece of me was always waiting for her, numbing the pain of her absence with the booze and weed, biding my time. But then she got engaged and reality sank in. She was never waiting for me, not that I gave her any reason to.”
“So you did too. That’s why you lost your shit on KK and Mac offered to hook you up with Tori. It makes sense now.”
I nod. “Yeah, but Tori wasn’t a one dick kind of girl.”
“Never liked her.”
“I know, you’ve mentioned that before, several times.”
He shrugs and smiles at me which makes me laugh. I love this dude.
“So then what?”
“Then I just went back to being numb. The finality of us sent me over the edge. I fucked six girls the week her ring and stupid hashtag popped up on Instagram.”
“Can’t blame you for that.”
“But it’s my fault, Blake. She sent me hundreds of messages, and called a million times after I left for Cambria. I declined them all. When I got here a couple weeks before you guys moved in I don’t think I was sober a single day.”
“So text her now.”
“I can’t! She’s fucking engaged and this is the first time I’ve seen her in person in four years. And my ex cuts her hair off.” I want to scream, I want my Jessup Juice back. “I need my juice.”
“Like hell you do. No more, Rhodes. You can fix this. Remember what you told me when I lost my shit before New Year’s?”
I shake my head. I don’t. I was tipsy, possibly drunk, at the time. Definitely self-medicated.
“You said, ‘I know there is somebody out there for me. Just need to find her.’ Then you told me to go fucking get my girl and I did. But you know what is wrong about that statement? You already found your girl and you’re too much of a pussy to go get her. If anything from what you said that night rang true, you need to take your own fucking advice, bro.”
Maybe he’s right, but that’s a lot of history to make up for. Blake fucked up, bad, but he did that all in the span of year. My fuck up? It’s been four years and counting. Besides, I can’t go see her until I’m sober.
“Thanks for listening, bro. If you repeat any of this, I’ll fucking cut your balls off.”
Blake laughs. “Get clean, get your girl. Fuck the rest.”
I nod.
Chapter 22: Stanzy
I was livid when we returned to Minnesota. It’s been two weeks since our visit with Mary Lou and the epic disaster that was the Pi Kappa party. I haven’t spoken to Chipper since we returned. The sixteen vases full of white, long stem roses indicates to me that he isn’t taking the hint to leave me the fuck alone.
Jessup wasn’t supposed to be there. It was supposed to be a fun weekend away with my sister, my fiancé, and our best friend.
“Stanz?”
“What?” I snap at the sound of my sister’s voice on the other side of my door.
“Can I come in?”
“Yeah,” I say trying to calm down. She’s not to blame. I’m just on edge.
“Are you going to class?” she asks meekly. Staley is anything but meek.
“Yes, I have to. It’s my final prep and I can’t miss it.”
I’m in my first year of physical therapy school, graduating early from the U of M as a junior and beginning my path to my dream job. We have finals at the end of the semester just like everyone else though and they suck.
Besides, I haven’t been able to focus and we’re supposed to have our
Therapeutic Modalities final on Friday.
I groan.
“Come on, let’s get coffee before you need to be there.”
✽✽✽
I crushed my finals and I’m feeling lighter than I did on Monday. Chipper is relentless with the calling and texting and DMs. Jessup’s Instagram went quiet except for one picture he was tagged in with two guys. One I recognized as Blake. The other I didn’t, but the #endofanera caption leads me to believe he was a football player too.
“Okay, bitches, let’s go,” Harper commands as she walks into the living room. I’m laying spread eagle on the couch, while Cora is reclined in our Lazy Boy, as we watch reruns of Friends on Netflix.
Staley and I are living off campus in a house with our best friends and enjoying our last year at the U of M even if I’m technically not in undergrad any longer. These beautiful women have become like sisters. We’ve shared some epic memories over the years with Harper, Cora and Poppy. After my injury I cheered them all on from the stands as they dominated the Big 10 Conference.
They’ve cheered me on while I was studying my ass off for physical therapy school.
“Where are we going?” Staley asks as she returns from the kitchen with a bottle of water in her hand.
“The Cove has a volleyball tourney. It starts tonight through the weekend. Five hundred dollar cash prize for the winner.”
“I’m in,” Cora says as she pops off the couch. “Let me change quick.”
About thirty minutes later we arrive at The Cove. It’s a warm spring day and this is just what I need to chill out at the end of the semester.
“Did anyone call the guys?” Staley asks, referring to our friends Duke, Evan and Trent. We’ve dominated at The Cove the last four summers in co-ed league. Well, three summers for me, but I cheered them on during my rehab.
“Harps did,” I hear Evan’s voice and turn around.
“Yay!” I squeak and jump into his arms. I’ve missed him. He’s studying for his MCATs and I’m working my tail off too. We don’t see each other much anymore.
“If I didn’t know better I’d say you’re trying to steal my fiancée,” a familiar and unwelcome voice invades my ear.
“What do you want, Chipper?” I ask with a bit of tension in my voice.
“Ugh, buzz kill,” Staley echoes my sentiment. She’s less and less of a fan every time he opens his mouth.
“You’ve been ignoring me.”
“Exactly, so how did you know I was here?”
He opens his phone and shows me Harper’s Instagram feed.
“Seriously?” I glare at her and look back at the picture of our court illuminated by the setting sun. The caption is #thecove with my besties and we’re all tagged in the photo.
“What? It’s a stunning picture. Hashtag no filter,” she replies.
I roll my eyes.
“We need to talk, Stanzy. You can’t just keep avoiding me. The wedding planner said you’ve been avoiding her too. You do know who my family is? We’re expected to be married in September. The announcement is set to be published in all the papers and Forbes is sending someone for an interview next month.”
“I only agreed to a wedding this fast because your mom insisted. I wanted to finish school first. I have two years left before I take my test and who knows where I’ll end up for my residency. What if I’m placed in Washington or Jersey? You’re not leaving Minnesota.”
I have every intention of staying in Minnesota, but I’m trying to prove a point.
“Stanz, I told you. You don’t need to finish school. You can help run the family foundation. Give money to causes you love. That is what other wives have done in our family to pass time. Or don’t work at all. Come with me on work trips and to events. Make other men drool when they see you on my arm. Whatever you want to do. You don’t need to be a doctor. I love you without the title.”
“You think I want to be a doctor for the title to impress you?” The laughter rises out of my chest and I can’t stop it. “You say it’s whatever I want to do, well, I want to be a doctor. I want help rehab athletes so injuries aren’t career ending. It’s what I love.”
“But,” he begins but I cut him off.
“You can’t just dress me up and parade me around to galas, fundraisers, and pop out a few heirs to the throne. I’m not a Barbie.”
“Stanz, I love you.”
“You love my image. I’m not sure you ever really loved me. What’s my favorite color?”
“What?” he asks, surprised.
“What’s my favorite food or place to vacation? What did I have to have with me every night as a child before I could fall asleep?”
“Umm,” he pauses. “Pink. Italian. Paris because we got engaged there. And, um, a blanket?”
“See, you’re guessing. After so much time together you’d think you’d know these intimate details of my life. Like I know your favorite food is deep-fried clams, which is fucking disgusting by the way. You love all things sea foam green which is a really random color, and you used to suck your thumb until you were eleven.”
“She loves purple, her favorite food is steak, she enjoys vacations in the Outer Banks, and she slept with a pig,” Evan pipes up.
“His name was Pucker,” Staley adds with smirk. “I’d say you’re oh-fer on this one, Chip Chip.”
Chipper glares at her.
“Chipper, you’re going to make someone a very happy and very wealthy trophy wife, but it’s not me. I’m not that girl.”
He shakes his head. “Stanzy, please don’t do this.”
“Sorry, but it’s over.” I walk over to our table and open my drawstring bag. “Here.” I hand him the blue velvet box that contains my engagement ring. I didn’t plan to break up with him this way, but he sort of brought it on himself.
He shakes his head again, but he takes the box.
“Goodbye, Chipper.”
He turns and walks away.
“Okay, as fun as that was, let’s get registered,” Staley announces. She looks over at me, but instead of sympathy for my busted relationship she is grinning ear to ear. I narrow my eyes at her, trying to look angry, but I can’t hold. I start to laugh and so does she.
“Finally! FREEEEE-DOMMM!” she shouts and wraps her arms around me.
“You’re an ass.”
“Let’s go win some money. You just dumped a billionaire. You’re gonna need it.”
“Shut up,” I say and elbow her in the ribs.
I’d like to say I did this completely for me. It was what I needed. And part of that is true because Chipper wasn’t supportive of my career and what I wanted to do with my life. Our marriage would have been a disaster.
But, there is a part of me that knows no matter what I do, who I meet, how much I think I’m in love, my heart will only ever belong to one man. The realization hurts me to my core.
Chapter 23: Rhodes
Present Day
“Rhodes!” Trey, our quarterback, shouts at me as I enter the locker room after our latest game. “We missed your sexy ass out there!”
“Yeah, I miss blocking for your skinny ass,” Bennett Grant, one of our linemen, says.
“Hey now, there’s nothing skinny about this ass,” I quip and turn around while grabbing two handfuls of my cheeks.
Everyone laughs.
We’re in Chicago and played the Bears on Sunday Night Football, twenty-seven to six loss. Our only points came from Miles Carson, our kicker.
Trey has said those exact words after every game since I went down. When I was recovering from surgery and not in the locker room, he texted that to me.
It’s December and the season ends next week with our final game at home. We have a solid team, but when you remove one piece of a puzzle it just isn’t complete. That’s how our team is. With me not on the field we’re incomplete and our whole squad has suffered. Not to inflate my ego, but we’ve only won one game since I’ve been out. Trey’s comments are not unwarranted at this point. We went from b
eing pre-season playoff contenders to last in our division with this loss to Chicago.
Road games are hard, and even worse when I’m not playing, but I choose to travel with my teammates. It’s good for the squad. The only downside is that I miss physical therapy with Stanzy. I’ve been making progress on both the knee and the girl so far.
“How’s the rehab going?” Stef asks, nodding towards my knee.
“Yeah, how’s the knee coming along? She going to get you back out there with us by next season?” Trey asks too.
“It’s good. I’m ahead of schedule.”
“Good, we fucking need you,” Bennett reiterates Trey’s feelings.
“You guys getting ready to suck me off right now?” I joke. “Keep those compliments coming. I’m getting hard.”
“Don’t get a big head there, Rhodesy. That kid from Cal is entering the draft. He’s putting up big yards,” Maurice “Ivy” Ives, a cornerback, says with a shrug.
“Fuck off. My knee is strong. I’ll be back and rush for over 2k. Just watch me.”
“Thank fuck for that,” Ivy says as he dries his nuts off with a small white towel that wouldn’t even wrap around his thick ass once if he tried.
“How’s the hot doc?” Trey questions, towel wrapped around his skinny waist and another wrapped around his long blonde hair. If he had cucumber slices on his eyes he’d be having the perfect spa day.
“What the fuck is that, bro?” Stef points at his head. “I thought we told you to knock that shit off.”
“Fuck off. I don’t like wet hair on my face,” Trey retorts.
“Let’s get back to the doctor,” Ivy says as he slips on his underwear. We have no shame in the locker room.
The boys were giving me hell for being so diligent in my rehab, skipping many bro-dates to go to the clinic. I may have told them that I’m going religiously because my doctor was a smokeshow. Not a total lie.
“I did some research,” Stef says while wiggling his eyebrows.
Completion (Cambria University Series Book 3) Page 21
