Thank you for answering my question about the pool. It is funny how finances always got in the way of things growing up when Father ran a mildly successful general store. Yes, I do remember our car trips to the Jersey Shore. It was always the town of Brigantine that we went to, as it was a stone’s throw from the Atlantic City casinos where Father could hopefully win back the gas money he spent getting there. He always ended up losing more, however, and wandered back to the car defeated, telling us all rather angrily to “get in, trip’s over.” And how we cried! And how you remained cold and silent the entire way. Don’t you think, in retrospect, that it would have been much easier had Father only bought us an aboveground pool?
Fawn
P.S. Yes, there was another building collapse, but everyone is okay. It happened way over in Northern Liberties, nowhere near my home. I believe the rain has weakened the underground structures of many of the older buildings.
From: Albert Collins
Sent: Fri, June 7, 2019 at 6:10 AM
To: Fawn Birchill
Subject: Regarding A Visit
Good afternoon,
Though we are very pleased to have received an offer to read in your store as well, we are going to politely decline, as Mr. McEwan has quite a full schedule already. I do hope you will stop by, however, and see him at the Grumpy Mug, as you say your store is just down the street.
Cheers,
Albert Collins
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Fri, Jun 7, 2019 at 6:40 AM
To: Albert Collins
Re: Regarding A Visit
Mr. Collins,
Thank you so much for responding to my query, though it was less than what I had hoped to garner. It seems silly that you are not willing to allow him another brief appearance at a store that is literally steps away from the one he is officially visiting. How about you ask him directly instead of dictating his every move? Perhaps Mr. McEwan would be interested in doing this, and you are so stuck in your ways that you are unable to see this. And I do understand that if he were to go visit every single bookstore in the vicinity, he would never go home. But please rest assured that we are the only two bookstores in the neighborhood, so it would only be two stops.
Please reconsider?
Fawn
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Fri, Jun 7, 2019 at 7:30 AM
To: Jack Grisby
Subject: When you get in
Jack,
Please take the stack of cards I left on the counter by the register and hand them out in front of the Grumpy Mug. They are discount cards for coffee and a book. As I was up on my roof the other night, I realized that people coming from the east are distracted by his store and never make it to mine, so this will be a good way of reminding them of our presence.
I believe Mark can’t be upset if you stay on the sidewalk.
Many thanks,
Fawn, Owner
From: Jack Grisby
Sent: Fri, Jun 7, 2019 at 10:00 AM
To: Fawn Birchill
Re: When you get in
Hi Fawn,
Rainbow and I stood outside and handed out the cards and when it wasn’t working she did magic tricks and put the cards in there pockets for them to find later. She is so talented omg.
Jack
June 10, 2019
I woke up this morning to discover fresh graffiti on the side of my building. This has never happened before, so I can’t help but wonder if it wasn’t Mark or one of his jealous employees. I asked Rainbow about it, but she had her door shut all night while working on an “illusion to go down in history,” so she was no help whatsoever.
The graffiti itself looks pedestrian and amateur, and it does bear the telltale signs of one who does not do this often. It’s really quite a way to wake up on an otherwise beautiful day: get the newspaper, then turn back to your home to see derogatory slang in bold letters sprayed across your siding. To whoever is reading this, please do not judge me. If you have paid any attention to my woes thus far, you would understand that I am at my wit’s end here and honestly knew not what else I was to do. Also, I am not a morning person. So I took a can of red paint from the basement and an old brush and walked over to the Grumpy Mug, still in my bathrobe, and wrote “LOWLIFE” in large, bold letters across his building. As I was halfway through, even at that early-morning hour, a tour bus passed and I immediately regretted choosing such a long word. I simply couldn’t just leave it at “LOWL” so I hastily finished and ran back inside to the safety of my fort.
I cannot believe that it has come to this. After the vandalizing, I tried to read my newspaper in peace but the graffiti, now on both of our buildings, would not leave my thoughts. It was all I could do not to pace around the room and check the windows.
And then, at about 7:30, Mark rode up on his bike. Through the window, I could see the look on his face change from pleasant to livid bafflement. He immediately turned to my store, and I ducked away from the window so quickly that the act of flitting away was almost as obvious as if I had been standing on the front lawn with a megaphone telling him I did it. That said, he must not have seen me and went inside. He emerged about twenty minutes later with a can of white paint.
Honestly, what is the world coming to that people are so vindictive? Why should I have to deal with this kind of jealous, petty behavior when all I want to do is sell books? And why should I have to suffer the slings and arrows of my customers’ judgments on my broken stair, toilet, windows, and floors? Often I feel like John Proctor in The Crucible or Shylock in The Merchant of Venice, desperately trying to make a case for myself before people who have already made up their minds. Selling books used to be such a simple, happy venture for me.
THE CURIOUS CAT BOOK EMPORIUM
Blog Post #5
Employee of the Year
And the winner is . . . Jack Grisby!
This month we looked back on the year and the many achievements and milestones to determine who among Fawn’s employees deserved this illustrious award. It was easy for the committee to decide the winner—not because everyone else is terrible but because Jack is so exemplary, generous, and passionate in his work. He puts everything into the Curious Cat Book Emporium, as if his life depended on it—and we assure you it does not, as Jack is very well-off, with an in-ground pool and an outdoor poolside rum bar, to only name a few of his family’s attributes.
So we reward Jack with a certificate, a ten-dollar gift card to the wine store, and a twenty-five-dollar gift card to the Curious Cat Book Emporium. Spend it wisely!
From: Jack Grisby
Sent: Tue, Jun 11, 2019 at 2:12 PM
To: Fawn Birchill
Subject: Rainbow emergecny
Hi Fawn,
Rainbow was doing contorshin stuff on the staircase and now her head is stuck between the banisters and I don’t know what to do. I tried olive oil and coco-nut cream but it didn’t work. Can you come downstairs to help her.
Jack
From: Jack Grisby
Sent: Tue, Jun 11, 2019 at 2:15 PM
To: Fawn Birchill
Subject: She’s okay
Hi Fawn,
Never mind she got her head out. We are going to clean the oil and lotion off the banister now.
Jack
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Tue, Jun 11, 2019 at 2:40 PM
To: Jack Grisby
Re: She’s okay
Hi Jack,
I’m sorry I missed this, but I’m glad she’s okay. Were there any customers in the store when this happened?
Many thanks,
Fawn, Owner
From: Jack Grisby
Sent: Tue, Jun 11, 2019 at 2:48 PM
To: Fawn Birchill
Re: She’s okay
Hi Fawn,
Yes, there were four I think and one helped to try to pull her head out and that’s when it came unstuck so I thanked him very much and gave him a discount on his book I hope that’s okay.
Jack
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Tue, Jun 11, 2019 at 3:01 PM
To: Jack Grisby
Re: She’s okay
That’s fine, Jack. I would have done the same thing myself.
Many thanks,
Fawn, Owner
June 14, 2019
There is an update on the graffiti. I am embarrassed to write this, but I believe it’s important that I acknowledge (even if I don’t admit it to Mark) that there has been a slew of vandalism this month in West Philadelphia. Authorities are saying that homes are being targeted and the culprits are most likely kids off school, punchy from the heat and bored with nothing to do. Apparently the graffiti itself isn’t gang related but instead, as I previously opined, amateurish and laced with childish profanities, which points to bored high school kids. Luckily for me, Mark has assumed it was one of the kids.
So yes, I made a bad judgment call by immediately accusing Mark. But with all that he has done, is it really so impossible for me to think that it could have been him? Was that really such a great leap in logic? Still, I really can’t believe that I did that.
phillysmallbiz.com
Wed, Jun 19, 2019
Top Review—The Curious Cat Book Emporium
Today when I asked their new employee to help me find A Moveable Feast, he took me to the culinary section. I thought maybe he was messing with me, so I was like, “Okay, where is it really?” And he looks at me with this blank expression and goes, “Well, we can order it for you.” I would have thought I was being punked, but the kid let me leave without buying anything, so I think his dumbness was for real. Do their employees read at all?
—Brittany G.
phillysmallbiz.com
Wed, Jun 19, 2019
Dear Brittany G.,
I apologize profusely that Jack was not able to show you where we keep A Moveable Feast. Please return, and I will be happy to show you. The fact that he took you to the culinary section is perhaps a reflection on the failing education system and not his own lack of interest in literature.
Fawn, Owner, The Curious Cat Book Emporium
phillysmallbiz.com
Wed, Jun 19, 2019
Top Review—The Curious Cat Book Emporium
Um, so their cat scratched me when I tried to remove him from the chair I wanted to sit on. All I did was pick him up by the scruff like a mother cat, and he totally freaked and drew blood! Why are they letting violent animals interact with customers?
—Stefanie C.
phillysmallbiz.com
Wed, Jun 19, 2019
Dear Stefanie C.,
I must ask that you first look to your choice of actions regarding Bert, and do not blame him outright for lashing out at you, as you say. I have known this cat to be nonviolent ever since he came into my life. Sometimes he is found curled up on one of our many chairs, as is his customary habit. If you want to sit in one of those chairs, you have two options: you may either sit in another chair or wait for him to leave the current chair. Pushing him off the chair or grabbing him by the back of the neck and dragging him down are not options. I have never had to ban anyone from my store except the year I opened when an older man came in and regularly slept and urinated on one of the couches (it has since been reupholstered); however, I may need to add another notch to my belt. So that I may sufficiently ensure that you will not come back and harm Bert again, what is your full name, please? Your PSB photo is blurry—perhaps on purpose?
All the best,
Fawn, Owner, The Curious Cat Book Emporium
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Wed, Jun 19, 2019 at 7:24 PM
To: Mark Nilsen
Subject: Warning: Cat Bully
Dear Mark,
A phillysmallbiz.com user that goes by the name of Stefanie C. came into my store, threw Bert off his couch, and then complained that he lashed out at her and scratched her. I know Bert to be harmless except to mice, so I take her story rather skeptically. I wanted to warn you about her and to ask that you watch her closely if she comes into your store and interacts with your cats. She might be cruel to them as well and then act surprised when they defend themselves. Looks like this woman might be running a racket where she goes to stores, gets “hurt” by the animals there, and requests reparations. She hasn’t yet gone that far with me, but I fear she might so I wanted to give you a fair warning.
Best,
Fawn
From: Mark Nilsen
Sent: Wed, Jun 19, 2019 at 8:09 PM
To: Fawn Birchill
Re: Warning: Cat Bully
Hi Fawn,
Thanks so much for the heads up on this. It’s a shame people behave this way.
Best wishes,
Mark
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Tue, Jul 2, 2019 at 4:09 PM
To: Mark Nilsen
Subject: Apologies
Dear Mark,
Though we spoke briefly, I wanted to also express my apologies in writing. In no way did I ask that Jack go into your store and, when the coast was clear, take down your Ian McEwan sign only to put it up in my store window. This preposterous idea is only something that could have come from the—dare I say—simple mind of this young man. He means well, so I ask that you please forgive him. Because his actions do secondarily represent my store, please forgive me as well.
I hope the sign has been returned in a favorable condition.
Best,
Fawn
July 3, 2019
I worry that Jack winning the employee of the year award has inspired him to take extreme measures in the betterment of this store. It’s one thing to go through the garbage to retrieve old unwanted signage, but it’s quite another to go to the Grumpy Mug in the middle of the day and take their posters out of the windows. The saddest thing in all this is that, just like the time he ran the Brillo pad over my wood floors, he has no idea what he did wrong. To reprimand him would be like reprimanding a dog for eating his own vomit—it’s just in his nature. And it is in Jack’s nature to care so greatly about what he is involved in. I believe it is something he inherited from his parents who are nothing but philanthropic.
In a way, Jack did a good thing in that he forced me to face my fears. These many months I have been avoiding that store, refusing to step inside out of fear that I might just love it.
The place simply struck me. I don’t know how else to put it. Stepping inside is like stepping into the comfort of your own home. Virtually everyone is friendly. It is well staffed and well organized, and it smells of coffee and paper. Once in a while, interrupting the jazz or classical music, one can hear the espresso machine brewing. I was lucky enough to see all five cats and found them to be absolutely adorable, calm, and friendly. One cat that, according to her collar, goes by the name of Scooch, came up and sat beside me on one of the sofas. She is a longhaired black cat with a white mark on her chest. She simply sat beside me and stared at me, as if peering into my soul. I pet her for some time while leafing through a coffee-table book on Australia. The other cats—Hero, Captain Flint, Lilly, and Shadow—walked by, their tails swishing with purpose. I didn’t get a chance to meet them all, but one of the employees was kind enough to tell me their names.
I gave this same employee the stolen sign and asked to speak to Mark, who promptly came down from the second floor to greet me.
He said, “Scooch is never so friendly. She must really like you.” It thrilled me to get such a compliment. I immediately apologized for the stolen sign. If he was upset, he didn’t show it.
After finishing my business there, I didn’t want to leave. And when I walked back up the street to my store and looked at it, trying to see it as a customer and not as a biased owner, something overcame me. It was a sense of desolation—as if while everyone else went one way, I had taken a wrong turn and found myself abandoned on a middle-of-nowhere road. Rainbow was performing tricks outside at the time and must have sensed my sadness, because she approached me and prod
uced a bouquet of plastic flowers from her mouth. What a kind, thoughtful gesture. She insisted that I keep them, and so they are sitting with me at my kitchen table as I drink a glass of wine.
Sometimes I can’t help but see the similarities between Mark and me. Like me, he clearly cares deeply for his business, and so how can I blame him? If the circumstances were different—if we weren’t directly down the street from each other, if he didn’t make it so difficult—it’s possible we’d get along, but I’m afraid I’ll never know this for sure. I believe we are kindred spirits, caught on different sides of the battle lines. But alas, battle we must.
THE CURIOUS CAT BOOK EMPORIUM
Blog Post #6
A Tale of Two Kitties!
For our second entry of the month we will compare and contrast the late and beloved Butterscotch and the lively Bert!
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Thu, Jul 4, 2019 at 3:03 PM
To: Tabitha Birchill
Subject: Father
Dear Mother,
I’m sorry I missed your call, though I wish you hadn’t left that message and instead just simply asked that I call you back immediately. And now, after several tries, I cannot seem to get through to you. Can you please tell me when the funeral will be? Will it be Catholic to align with how he was raised, or will it be born-again?
Perhaps we should bury him with his Pendleton blanket? I think he might like that. Call me please.
Fawn
July 4, 2019
My father is dead. My father is dead. My father is dead. My father is dead.
July 4, 2019 (More)
I find it rather humorous and a bit ironic that I am surrounded by books with mostly clean old-fashioned conclusions—where the protagonist struggles against a great burden, is forced against an immovable object, but in the end manages to overcome, to break free and rise above. Or perhaps like in some of my Russian novels (take Nabokov, for example), the protagonist manages to give in to selfishness and childishness and is ultimately crushed under their own hubristic weight. But here, in the real world, we just keep living. Living until we expire. This is the irony: that I live surrounded by these fantasy-filled, tidy ribbon-and-bow stories where all is either figured out or dashed upon the rocks, and here I must continue to idly muddle through. It’s very anticlimactic, being human. Existing not as a grandiose character in a story but as a mere living and breathing animal with veins and gray hair and a bad back.
Confessions of a Curious Bookseller Page 25
