Knox thought she was trouble, and he had it absolutely right. If the man really knew what she’d done to her own family, he’d probably take out a restraining order to keep him away from his brothers. Well, he wouldn’t have to. Amanda would be gracious and leave, right after she made her confession to Cody. That alone should be enough to prove she didn’t belong here.
Defeated and alone, she let the crowd expel her, work around her until she slowly ended up at the edge, finally free from notice. Amanda lifted her head and looked around. She’d only been to the ranch once, last weekend, and then only into the house. Other than stepping out on the back porch for Cody to point out all the barns, silos, corrals and pastures, she’d gotten no other tour of the property.
Now she found herself at an angle with the barns way across the field and the house on the opposite stretch. At the base of the tree-lined slope, Amanda could see way out into the pasture as it seamlessly stretched out for miles, but it was what was tucked into the other side of the hill that drew her attention.
Protected from the ranch by a thin barrier of trees and tucked into the protective overhang of the hill lay a Garden of Eden. Surrounded by the stretch of chain links, the garden grew lush and full. It stretched out so far it had room in the center to hold a towering greenhouse.
The lush foliage and the sweet scents emanating out of the garden beckoned her forward until her hands curved around the edges of the sign hanging from the gate. No entrance allowed.
Feeling much like Mary in the secret garden, she entered not a ruin but the mythical embrace of life all around her. In awe at the variety and health of so many strange-looking plants, she moved slowly through the raised beds, touching and admiring the beautiful blossoms of flowers and the strange veins of the thick shrubbery.
Somebody obviously loves this garden.
Amanda ran right into somebody as she rounded a corner. Her eyes watered as pain shot up her nose when it mashed into hard, warm muscle. Stumbling backward, she felt her feet tilt. She’d have landed on her ass if a set of strong hands hadn’t gripped her arms and pulled her back upright.
“Amanda?” Jace’s tone sounded as shocked as she felt. “What are you doing here?”
* * * *
Jace stared at the woman before him, unable to comprehend she was really there. He escaped into his garden nearly at the break of day. His brothers no doubt thought he fled the party they’d been planning all week due to his normal objection to oversized gatherings. Normally, they’d have been right.
This morning, though, Jace fled from more than just the mayhem consuming the ranch. He was fleeing the nightmares that butchered his sleep into sparse chunks. With very little sleep and feeling tense, Jace wasn’t in the mood for a party. Actually, the last thing he needed was to be staring down into Amanda’s beautiful face.
All day Jace labored in the garden. Barely drinking and sparing no time for food, he punished himself beneath the sweltering sun. Starving, dehydrated, completely worn down, Jace couldn’t help but wonder if his mind somehow manifested the very person who drove him to such insanity.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude. I just…couldn’t help myself once I saw this.” She gestured around to the garden. “It’s quite impressive. Is it yours?”
“Yeah,” he answered slowly, slightly defensive.
Jace couldn’t help it. He dreamt of this woman, but such beautiful dreams always faded to the haunting horror of how deeply he had betrayed Sharon. He could hear Sharon’s tears through the darkness, murmuring with the whisper of the leaves in this garden, the garden where Jace went down on one knee and swore to Sharon to love only her.
If those dreams had only happened after she died, then maybe he wouldn’t hate himself so much for having them. They hadn’t. They came to him while he slept with Sharon in his arms. They lingered during the morning while he sat beside her at the breakfast table. They haunted his days, his nights, his years, and now, finally, here Amanda stood—the other woman. The one Jace had been denied.
“It’s very lovely.”
He could sense her distress. It weighed on him. Jace didn’t need to hear the words to know something bothered Amanda today. He could feel it in his very own soul. She’d been hurt, weakened. Jace bet the answer began with a K and ended with his asshole of an older brother.
“I mean it, Jace.” Amanda repeated herself, looking so very earnest. “I’d have never thought you could garden so well.”
“I got a degree.” He finally managed a response.
Jace guessed it didn’t matter what he said. Amanda relaxed slightly at the first sound of his voice. “A degree?”
“A botany degree. Graduated with honors.” He released his hold on her, turning as he muttered. “Knox didn’t go to college, I got my botany degree, and I assume you know Cody got a degree in history.”
“Actually, I didn’t know.”
Amanda said it softly, almost like she’d just been defeated by something. He sure wasn’t helping the situation. Jace took a deep breath and told himself to get over it. It wasn’t Amanda’s fault he couldn’t get her out of his head. She certainly didn’t try to make him betray Sharon.
That was all him.
“So,” Jace straightened up and forced himself to relax, “my humble garden pulled you away from all the excitement of the party?”
“I guess I just needed a break.” Amanda’s nose wrinkled slightly. “It’s awfully loud and crowded.”
For some strange reason, it comforted Jace to know Amanda shared his views on parties. Still, it didn’t explain how she ended up here in his garden. “I’m surprised Cody didn’t take you up to the main house.”
There. It happened. The light in her eyes dimmed.
“I haven’t found him yet.” Amanda offered him a slight smile. “I’ve been looking for him for over an hour now. You wouldn’t happen to have any suggestions?”
“Sorry. I’ve been here all day. All I can tell you is he isn’t here.” Jace shrugged, trying to brush her concern off as nothing. Truth was he believed it was nothing. Amanda may worry about the why, but Jace knew Cody well enough to know the answer wasn’t another woman.
Amanda would just have to learn. Right now, she was at the sighing and looking lost stage. “Oh, well. That’s sort of the story of the day.”
“Not a good day, huh?” Jace could see the answer on her face, so he didn’t bother waiting to hear it from her lips. “So, you want to tell me what Knox did to rattle you so bad?”
Amanda froze, telling Jace his lightly teasing tone hadn’t helped make the question go down easy. The flash of humiliation and fear in her eyes told Jace Knox had really stepped over the line. He should have figured. Amanda wasn’t acting like her normal fearless, mouthy self.
“You heard about it already?” She looked like she didn’t have enough hope left to wish for a no.
“Heard what?” Jace retorted. “I haven’t heard anything. Like I said, I’ve been here since the sun came up.”
“Oh.” Amanda chewed her lower lip in a gesture Jace found endearingly vulnerable. “So, how did you—?”
“It was a guess and not a hard one to make. Want to talk about it?”
“No.”
“Sure?”
“Absolutely.”
Jace smiled, accepting her answer. Amanda didn’t need the absolution of a confession. She needed the distraction of a very large garden. “Well, then how about a tour?”
“A what? Of the garden?”
“I prefer agricultural experiment.” Jace looped an arm over her shoulders and turned her down the aisle. “Sounds more manly, doesn’t it?”
Chapter 17
Amanda didn’t know how Jace did it, but somehow he magically managed to suspend the whole world and make it stop just for her. Perhaps there were more secrets to his garden than just its hidden location. Or maybe it was the man himself and the silly, contented way he made her feel just by being near.
She didn’t know and hones
tly didn’t care. His tour took the whole afternoon. Filled with laughter and stories, with the simple peace of being with somebody who just fit, it had been a wonderful day. Like a fairy tale, it even ended with them snuggling up to each other under the cool shade of a fruit tree.
The lower branches drooped under the weight of ripe apples. Jace picked one before settling down along her side. A true boy scout at heart, he had a pocket knife at the ready to carve up the plump apple. Amanda watched his hands, so big and strong, work with controlled precision to cut a perfect wedge. Spearing it with his knife, he offered her the bite from the tip of his knife.
Amanda didn’t hesitate to eat directly from the blade. The cool edge pulled free without even a whisper of a nick. The slightly sweet, crunchy treat filled her with more than contentment. This was it, one of those moments in life when every sense in her body felt relaxed and at peace. Too many times in life Amanda wished she could freeze time and live suspended only within the moment.
No amount of wishing could stop the sun from dipping lower and lower on the horizon. As if to mock Amanda, it waved farewell to the day in a vibrant fan of deep reds, succulent oranges, and sizzling yellows. The good-bye was only made more obnoxious by its beauty, so striking it polished off Amanda’s moment perfectly.
“The fireworks will be starting soon,” Jace commented. His slow drawl thickened the sweet tension around her, and Amanda sighed.
“You guys really go all out when you throw a party, huh?”
“It was Knox’s idea.”
“This make-out fest was his idea?”
“Make-out fest?” Jace chuckled. “It’s a Fourth of July party.”
Amanda rolled her eyes. “It’s a hook-up party. Don’t think I didn’t notice how the women outnumbered the men.”
“Can’t help if the invitation list was written by men.”
“Oh? Men, is it? And did you invite any pretty little thing for yourself?” Amanda meant it as a joke, but even as the words moved through her, her throat tightened down with anger at the very idea.
“Nah,” Jace drawled, “I let Cody invite her for me.”
Amanda couldn’t stop a laugh from escaping. He said just what she wanted to hear, but then Jace had already proven how good he was at that.
“Well, I guess I know where Cody is now. You two swapped dates, huh?”
“Actually, we prefer to share.”
The dark promise in Jace’s soft statement dried up her laughter. It happened. They came full circle back to the problem that drove her into the lush depths of Jace’s exotic agricultural experiment. Was it all a joke?
And if it is, Mr. Wonderful here is actually the biggest asshole I’ve ever met.
Amanda didn’t want to learn this moment, the whole day, had been nothing more than elaborate fabrication. Not with Jace. With Cody, though, she could give him both barrels of her temper and leave him to a slow death in the middle of the road, but Jace was her sweetheart.
“It really is a big party.” Amanda turned her gaze up to the sky, intentionally ignoring Jace’s comments. “It will be the talk of the town for weeks.”
“Yeah.” She felt Jace’s attention shift back to the apple and felt the slight hurt in his withdrawal. “I guess Knox wanted to make a statement. It’s the first party we’ve had since…”
Sharon. The answer popped into her head, leaving a sick, heavy feeling in her stomach. Cody’s Sharon. It had been three years, and as Amanda taxed her memory, no old rumor surfaced of any of the Reese brothers being involved with anybody since her death.
Cody’s Sharon…Jace’s Sharon? Knox? Her heart leapt over the rising moon at the very idea. It was insane and completely ridiculous to even think. There was no way three brothers shared one woman. Well, maybe for a night, but a fiancée?
No. She had to be stuck in a nightmare, deluded into believing she was awake by the realistic details of the dream, because this could not be real. Yet, it somehow fit. Amanda didn’t deserve the fantasy, but the darkness was where she’d lived most of her life. Even if she managed to smile and perform through most days, none of it ever stopped the sadness, the loneliness from filling her nights.
“It’s just been a long time since we enjoyed ourselves.”
Jace shrugged beside her, seeming completely unaware of her mental breakdown. He’d been perfectly in tune with her all day, but now, suddenly, the bond snapped. He was too perfect. Too perfect for her, at least.
Of course, there was Knox. He was probably just what she deserved. For as close as she felt to Jace all day, the sensation paled in comparison to what she felt when she looked at Knox. He saw her, the real her.
“Besides, Knox doesn’t know how to do anything with subtlety. You should see this place at Christmas.”
This whole day was just some cruel and twisted backlash fate had planned for all the wicked things she let Cody do to her over the past weeks. All his teasing and joking wormed its way into some deep part of her head and concocted this entire fantasy that it meant something more. What a stupid thing to think—that she could take a bit of the forbidden fruit and still live in the Garden of Eden.
“It’s all right, Amanda.” A piece of apple waved in front of her vision. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”
Her head jerked up to meet Jace’s gaze. The light blue shards in his eyes glimmered in the light of the pale moon. He knew, knew about the panic seizing her heart. She watched the tips of his lips lift in a gentle smile that warmed through her soul and stilled the wildness beating through her.
“It’s gonna be all right, Amanda.” Soft and rough, his palm curled around her chin, lifting her closer and closer to the murmurs falling from those lips. “I promise you, it’s gonna be better than all right.”
The words whispered against her lips in a teasing caress as everything inside Amanda stilled in anticipation for the next second when, finally, he brushed his mouth against hers. Within the stillness, she could feel a bolt of uncontrolled panic strike right through her. Even as the words sped past her throat, it tried to tighten down and choke them out.
“I almost fucked Knox under the carport.”
Boom!
The sky exploded into a magnificent shower of lights. Twinkling with a vibrancy that outshone the stars, the little droplets scattered and dripped downward in colorful symmetry. Amanda leapt up with the impact, stumbling backwards in horror at her own revelation.
Jace shot to his feet. With the clap of another firework, the world lit up bright enough for her to see the anger etching into lines of fury on his face. The dream spiraled out of control into a nightmare. The path to her descent into total humiliation was her own irrational behavior.
Nothing left to do but flee.
Her feet stumbled over the turn and the first few steps. Quickly, they found the rapid beat of retreat only to come to a tumbling stop, pitching her forward into Cody’s shadowed silhouette. He stepped out into the aisle, appearing suddenly not five feet from where she’d been cuddling with Jace.
He heard. The truth showed itself on Cody’s harsh features as another thunderclap rolled through the sky, lighting it up almost as bright as day. The panic in her seized, solidifying into true fear as she felt Cody’s eyes focus over her shoulder on Jace. That look told it all. He was joking. Cody didn’t share. Now there would be repercussions for this whole twisted day.
Amanda didn’t have the voice to say anything, let alone struggle, when Cody latched on to her. Without a word to Jace or her, he dragged her off into the night.
* * * *
Cody looked high and low for Amanda all day. All damn day!
Yeah, he ’d heard about the rumors of a skirmish up at the main house. Something about Amanda Johnson making a scene and Knox having to deal with her. He wasted a lot of time finding Knox just to get the jackass treatment from his older brother.
Knox might have been tightlipped when Cody caught up to him, but the ranch hands weren’t. Cody got enough pieces to figure Knox either moles
ted or mauled Amanda under the carport.
Either way, Knox’s brutish behavior meant little in comparison to Amanda and Jace’s snuggle fest. Cody had seen it. Standing there as the sun had set, it was obvious to him what happened.
Somehow Amanda found her way into Jace’s secret world. It was Jace’s magical world where he mesmerized women, seducing them not out of their clothes but into lowering their defenses. His brother charmed women into falling at his feet with such ease it made Cody sick.
Cody was the stupid bastard who put in two weeks’ worth of work to get Amanda just to relax around him. Then came Jace, and in one afternoon, he had Amanda curled up at his side like a contented lover. Cody had seen the look Amanda gave Jace. She stared up his older brother like a woman in love. Entranced, Jace lured her slowly into something deeper, more intimate than sex.
It lit Cody up like nothing else could. The feral aggression blinding him from rational thought needed a physical outlet. Despite laying all the blame on his older brother, Cody intended to take his retribution out on Amanda.
This is all her fault, anyway. She did this to him. Every night she gave him everything he asked of her body but never anything he wanted from her heart. It hurt him more than he cared to recognize, making him feel an insecurity he would never admit to. Instead of dealing with either emotion, Cody went for the easy out and just let his anger and lust take control.
Pushing through the door to the old barn, he felt a certain peevish justice in dragging Amanda into Knox’s domain. He was about to dirty big brother’s workshop up with some wicked sex. Set away from all the new structures, it lingered behind the party. They’d draw no notice from the crowd or anybody else. Way out here, he could do a lot more than fuck. Cody had the time and the silence to dominate and brand Amanda in such a way that when he’d finished riding her tonight, he’d leave a permanent mark on her soul.
Kansas Heat Page 15
