It might be rather fun to have a small house so far away – the air is lovely, and one looks at Orkney from the drawing room! The only sad thing is that part of the roof was blown off in the great gale last January, and I shall have to put in electric light of course. The grid runs past the door luckily.
Do you think me mad?
ER
Tuesday undated [?early August 1952] to Queen Elizabeth II
Buckingham Palace
Darling, I do hope that you don’t think me too temperamental for words, I don’t often give way, but somehow it all comes welling up when I talk to you & Margaret, & I long for the day when I shall feel alright again. You must bear with me for a bit – I am sure that I shall regain iron control again very soon. The thought of going to dear Birkhall is very extraordinary. If you can imagine yourself going there without Philip, without Charles, without Anne, or Nanny (!) or Bobo you can imagine my feelings! Your very loving Mummy
6 August 1952 to the Marchioness of Salisbury
Buckingham Palace
My dearest Betty,
Owing to various unforeseen complications, I have had to put off my visit to Holyrood in September, which is very sad. But, please will you come next year instead, & we will have all the things we want to see & hear. I am terribly disappointed as I long to see you & Bobbety.
If you feel very strong for the simple life, do come & stay austerely with me at Birkhall after you leave Balmoral. You know how small & uncomfortable the house is, but the welcome would be ENORMOUS, and it would give me such real pleasure to feel that you were coming dearest Betty. Bobbety could have his Australian to lunch.
What fun your party was on Friday. Winston was so angelic about the King – he has such tender understanding, & I was so touched & helped.
With my fond love,
ever your loving friend
Elizabeth R
31 August 1952 to Queen Mary
Birkhall
Darling Mama
It was so very kind of you to reply so quickly, and I am indeed delighted to hear about the silver dishes and sauce boats. They will be very useful and I am deeply grateful to you for lending me these things.
It is so difficult nowadays to collect enough for running a house, and your kindness will ease the situation greatly.
I wonder if you saw in the paper about the old Castle in Caithness? When I was staying with the Vyners I saw this small castle, & heard that it was going to be allowed to crumble away. It belongs to a nice old man called Imbert-Terry, and I felt that it was such a wrong thing to happen to an interesting old place, that I said I would try & keep it going, anyway for the moment.
It is near the sea, with lovely views, & might be nice for a change sometimes, and perhaps one could lend it to tired people, for a rest. It will only need a housekeeper, and will be rather fun to do up gradually.
I am sure that dear Sandringham is looking attractive now, and I do hope that the ‘open garden’ days do not disturb you too much.
With again my loving thanks for your kindness about the silver,
I am your devoted daughter in law
Elizabeth
15 September 1952 to Edith Sitwell
Birkhall
My dear Miss Sitwell
It was so very kind of you to send me a copy of your lovely book.* It is giving me the greatest pleasure, and I took it out with me, and I started to read it, sitting by the river, & it was a day when one felt engulfed by great black clouds of unhappiness & misery, and I found a sort of peace stealing round my heart as I read such lovely poems & heavenly words.
I found a hope in George Herbert’s† poem, ‘Who could have thought my shrivel’d heart, could have recovered greennesse? It was gone quite underground.’ And I thought how small and selfish is sorrow. But it bangs one about until one is senseless and I can never thank you enough for giving me such a delicious book wherein I found so much beauty & hope – quite suddenly one day by the river.
It is such an entrancing collection of beautiful & unusual things, & must have taken a lot of digging & delving to find so much variety. I am deeply touched by your thought of me, I love being given books, and I send you my warmest thanks.
I am, yours very sincerely,
Elizabeth R
3 October 1952 to the Marquess of Salisbury
Birkhall
My dear Bobbety
Thank you so much for your kind letter.
I must admit that I had to screw myself up a good deal to finally say that I would go to S. Rhodesia, but I do admire [Cecil] Rhodes, & I hope very much that Federation will ultimately prove a success, and if a visit would help in any way of course I am glad to go. […]*
It has been rather cold & windy here, but I have not been very conscious of the weather, & I can’t quite remember what has happened, except that Lochnagar has twice been glittering with snow. I went to Beaufort for two days, where the Lovats live a beautifully feudal existence, surrounded by a mass of glorious children. It is obviously a happy life, lots of cream & butter and faded tartan and local leadership. A useful life, as well as an enjoyable one.
I had a very nice visit from Winston yesterday.† He was absolutely charming & very interesting, and I realised suddenly how very much I am now cut off from ‘inside’ information. He is truly a remarkable man, & with great delicacy of feeling too.
Please give Betty much love, & I hope so much to meet later on.
Yours very sincerely,
Elizabeth R
29 November 1952 to Sir Alan Lascelles
Sandringham
My dear Tommy
Thank you so much for your letter about Mr Wheeler-Bennett,‡ and for sending me his book about Hindenburg.
From what you say, I do feel that he sounds a suitable person to undertake a life of the King, especially if he really wants to do it.
I have the greatest confidence in your choice, as I know that you, more than anybody understands what is needed, and if you like him personally, I expect that we shall too. I would very much like to meet him, and perhaps this could be arranged when I come back to London.
It will not be an easy book to write – so many years taken up with war, and such a short political life after the War.
If only the King had been allowed a few years of comparative peace – he would have had a chance to ease down a bit, & do all the things he had planned, or some of them anyway.
There can be very few Kings of England whose reigns were so harried & harassed by troubles & worries & anxieties on such an immense scale. First the abdication, & all the agony of mind – I doubt if people realize how horrible it all was to the King & me – to feel unwanted, & to undertake such a job for such a dreadful reason, it was a terrible experience.
Then the War with all its agony, & then ‘after the War’, which was a dreadful strain on the King. I suppose that we have been through a revolution and, as usual, people hardly realized what was happening to them.
All this crammed into 15 short years – it is a dizzy thought.
But you are the important person as regards the book. You will probably have to write a good deal of it yourself, in notes etc, as nobody else can do it. I will do all I can to help, tho’ it is difficult.
I suppose that one will never feel the same again. I talk & laugh & listen, but one lives in a dream & I expect that one’s real self dies when one’s husband dies, and only a ghost remains. The only things that rouse me to anger are when people look at me in a penetrating way, & say ‘are you feeling BETTER’ and the other people who say ‘but what a wonderful death for the King – how that must comfort you’. If only they knew!
I shall hope to see you next week in London, here we have had cold pure days, with blue skies, & such kind welcomes from all the old friends.
Yours
Elizabeth R
29 November 1952 to Sir D’Arcy Osborne
Buckingham Palace
My dear D’Arcy,
I was so glad to hear from you,
tho’ very sad to think that with all our confabulations & discussions your friends cannot save you from liquidation – I am sure that a ring, or just one jewel might help, but you were adamant. I can’t tell you how much I enjoyed having you at Birkhall – perhaps you realised how agonizing life was to me, & how one could not bear seeing people, and how you were one of the very few friends I wanted to see – you were so kind & understanding, and I was so very grateful to you. Next year I hope to be more brave.
I was so very touched by the letter written by your Swiss friend – he must be charming & kind. I enclose a little note, & wonder whether you would send it on to him when you next write. I hope that I have addressed it right?
Charles & Anne are very well, & Charles is a great love of mine. He is such a darling & so like his mother when she was a small child.
With all wishes for a happy Xmas from your friend,
Elizabeth R
5 January 1953 [misdated 1952] to Prince Paul of Yugoslavia
Sandringham
My dear Paul,
The chocolates that you kindly sent me are too excellent for words, and I send you my warmest thanks for your charming thought. The extraordinary thing is, that they are all so good. I have never had a box of chocolates before which didn’t have pink flavoured with bath salts, or nougat made of iron filings & sand, and it is so exciting to know that yours are all delicious.
Thank you a thousand times.
I rather love being here, because every stick & stone & every corner reminds me of Bertie. He was always so happy here, and adored the estate & the people, and in his short time did so much to improve and beautify the place. I feel that he is so close to me here.
As the time goes on I miss him more & more – he was always so good & loving & thoughtful, & so much fun to be with – you knew him well, & of course he had developed and strengthened his already strong character through those long years of war, and life is immensely dreary without him.
We were hardly ever apart during our married life – except when he was abroad visiting troops etc, so Paul, you can imagine how horrid life is. This sounds rather complaining, but I don’t mean it like that, & only write freely because I know that you were fond of Bertie.
It was so delightful seeing you again, & I do hope that we shall meet again before too long. It is delicious seeing Olga occasionally and hearing your news.
David is staying here for the shooting, & is very well.
With again all my thanks for the chocolates, & with my fond love to Olga,
Ever yours affect.
Elizabeth
3 February 1953 to Queen Elizabeth II
Buckingham Palace
My Darling Lilibet,
It was so lovely being at Sandringham with you & Philip & Margaret, and I felt very set up by the end of January. I can’t quite believe that it has come to an end and that delicious time of skies & keepers & clear (or foggy) cold air is over. You were so angelic, & kind, & thoughtful, and I did so adore being with you.
It is so difficult to try & carry on, having lost all one’s interests – the gardens, farming, pictures etc, and I am so thankful to still have the horses. It is so much more amusing to have them at Sandringham, & I should hate to have them anywhere else, as I always connect them with you!
I do hope that I shall be able to keep them going – perhaps someday I shall win a race, & that would help!
I went down to Canvey Island* yesterday – it was terribly like the war all over again, the same defiance, the same ‘I don’t care’ & I felt quite shattered & exhausted by memories, & the sad reality of the present tragedy. Poor little homes – poor dogs & cats, kind policemen & St Johns – oh it is so horrible.
Your loving Mummy
2 March 1953 to Queen Mary
Buckingham Palace
My Darling Mama,
I cannot begin even to tell you how touched & grateful I am by your very kind suggestion that I might wear your robe at the Coronation. This has greatly eased my mind, because I know that it would have been very difficult to shorten my own Coronation robe, & I was beginning to wonder what would happen.
I do think it so dear and kind of you, and I shall see that your beautiful robe is taken great care of, and I send you my very warmest thanks.
I am so terribly sad that you have had such a horrid time, & felt so unwell for the last week,* and I do so hope that you will soon feel better.
It is so miserable for you, & all our thoughts are with you all the time.
With my love, and more thanks – ever your devoted daughter in law
Elizabeth
13 April 1953 to Lady Doris Vyner
Birkhall
My Darling Doris,
So often we have shared moments of great sorrow & suffering, & I was so afraid that last week might have been one of intolerable anguish to you & Clare. But you were both so wonderful & so composed & brave, that one would never have known how deeply you must have felt, both before, during and after that lovely dedication of the Memorial.* It was so wonderful that you both wished me to be there, and I can never tell you how touched I was at being asked.
The whole conception of the memorial is so perfect, these two young, brave hopeful figures, so deeply moving – how terribly proud you must be through all the suffering and torture of mind.
It was so heavenly being with you & Clare, & once again I subsided into a delicious feeling of ‘being with friends’. There is nothing like it to heal wounds – so often one’s own silly mind which doesn’t rest makes them worse, and I am so very grateful for all your loving Kindness.
The DINNER PARTY was so splendid. So smooth & sophisticated, those just right cocktails, the wonderful food & drink, the ROLLS in their NAPKINS, the sparkling conversation – it was so right, & such a good idea to have it then.
Thank you again & again, darling Doris, from your ever loving,
Elizabeth R
27 May 1953 to Queen Elizabeth II
Clarence House
Darling Angel, I don’t want to bother you when you are so busy, but I must somehow borrow a row of diamonds for the Coronation, & if I don’t hear from you I will get hold of one of Granny’s† – O.K.? Your loving Mummy
12 June 1953 to Sir Alan Lascelles
Clarence House
My dear Tommy,
Thank you so much for your kind letter.
I have really felt quite shattered by the whole thing,* and cannot help feeling that it would never have happened if the King had been here.
I have not mentioned it to anyone except the Queen, but I would like to talk to you, soon, please. I have nobody I can talk to about such dreadful things. Have you mentioned it to anybody belonging to me? I wondered today if Arthur knew.
It is a great comfort that you understand the human side of such tragedies – for so they are to the young.
Yours very sincerely
Elizabeth R
7 July 1953 to Queen Elizabeth II
In the Train [visiting Southern Rhodesia]
My Darling Lilibet
We have just finished a day in the train stopping at places like Gwelo, Que Que, Gatooma, Hartley etc, & it seems a very short time since we were all alighting at the same places, & being urged back into the train by Papa!
They have all doubled in population since we were there, new factories springing up, & lots of young people, especially men, looking very tough & happy & prosperous. I am sure that this country has a great future, tho’ it will have to go through the teething troubles of Federation. […]
The stewards on the train are all South Africans – one was with us in 1947 – very nice, & for our first dinner on board we had eight courses! I sent for the menus & pruned!
It is rather difficult not having anyone who has ever been on a tour, and I do miss Peter [Townsend] very much.* He had experience, & I find that alas! this only comes through silly mistakes. One was terribly spoilt having Tommy [Lascelles] & Michael [Adeane]† I suppose.
Th
e Comet flight was very successful, and we were lucky enough to have good weather. Khartoum is the bugbear. But my goodness, we all felt ghastly for at least 5 days – but now the heart has stopped bumping, & the knees are stiffening and apart from Margaret complaining dreadfully of the cold in her sleeping cabin, & coughing rather ostentaciously (can’t spell it) on the platforms, we are feeling restored. […]
Your very loving Mummy
9 July 1953 to Sir Osbert Sitwell
Royal Tour
Southern Rhodesia
My dear Sir Osbert,
I have been meaning to write to you for many weeks, and this is the first opportunity I have had to thank you for 2 letters & the delightful book of short stories. I read one story between Beirut & Khartoum as the Comet magic-carpeted us through the sky, one in Salisbury, & now I am spending 2 nights at a hotel called Leopard Rock and I have been reading more stories in between gazing at the most glorious mountains. It really is such very beautiful country, range after range of blue mysterious hills, fading away into far far away, and a great plain stretching away for ever between the mountains. The light is exquisite, the sun bright & hot & the air cool. I love the immensity of Africa, one feels a great rhythm all the time, but how much more beautiful England is.
I do hope to see you when I return.
This country is very cheerful, hardworking & loyal & English, full of young, eager people who are going to make a great country of it and NO DEATH DUTIES!
Yours very sincerely,
Elizabeth R
23 August 1953 to Queen Elizabeth II and the Duke of Edinburgh
Birkhall
Darling Lilibet & Philip,
Being at Balmoral with you was HEAVEN. Thank you both, darlings, for being so angelic, it all means so much to me, and it was such fun being with my children & grandchildren and laughing & talking & being a family, which is the only thing worth living for.
Your very loving Mummy
Counting One's Blessings Page 51
