by R. M. Lynn
“Shit, guys,” I mumble. “What if she does suck?”
Oliver grins at me and says, “Then let Dylan be the one to break the news.”
“I got your back, man,” Dylan says before finishing his own beer.
I roll my eyes. It’s only another minute or so later when Alivia’s name is called by the deejay, and she’s making her way up onto the stage. Mackenzie has now seated herself between Noah and Oliver, and she screams and cheers wildly from her seat. I can tell the attention only makes Alivia blush harder. She runs a hand through her hair as the music begins. I know the words are flashing on the screen to her right, but she’s not looking at them. Her voice is smaller than it should be as she begins to sing, and I take note that she probably isn’t used to hearing her own voice through the speakers.
Her eyes meet mine, and I mouth, “Relax."
I give her a wink, and I can see the smile behind the microphone. Forty seconds into the song, her voice relaxes with the rest of her body, and suddenly she’s a completely different person. She belts out the chorus of Ariana Grande’s Dangerous Woman, and I think all of our jaws drop. The girl can fucking sing. Her eyes are closed, her head tipped back as she holds every note with ease. The way she sings turns me on. She puts her whole body into it, her hips moving to the beat, her free hand running down the side of her.
“She’s hot,” Dylan blurts out.
I’d punch him if I wasn’t focusing so hard on what she was doing on stage. The guys mumble their agreements. When she finishes her song, the crowd roars with cheers. She hands the microphone off to the next person and hurries back over to the table. I stand, and she immediately slams into my chest, her arms wrapping around my waist. I hug her back and dip my head so she can hear me.
“You were fucking incredible,” I tell her.
“My heart is beating so fast,” she says in response.
She looks up at me, huge smile on her face. I wish I could kiss her, wish she was mine so I could. I swear my heart stops when her lips press to my jaw in a quick kiss. The next moment she’s out of my arms and taking praise from the rest of the group. I watch her smiling wide and chatting enthusiastically with Mackenzie and Ayden. She’s so fucking cute. I like her a lot, but I’ll probably never admit it out loud. Her being with someone else was starting to get to me more than it ever did before. She feels something with me, I know she does. There’s no way she doesn’t. If she doesn’t figure out what she really wants soon, I don’t know what it’ll do to us.
◆◆◆
Two weeks pass after Alivia’s first night of karaoke. During the two weeks, we see each other a couple days out of the week, but not as much as we did before. I don’t press her. Saturday night comes, and after our gig at Taps, Dylan decides he wants to go to a house party. Tanner invites us to one every week, and I think he finally is able to convince Dylan to come. Personally, I think it’s because he knows Dylan will attract more women to the house. I know once word spreads that the entire band is showing up, the house will be crawling with girls.
We arrive at the house later than everyone else, and Noah thankfully agrees to be DD. Our first stop is to the backyard to get ourselves a drink. Within the next hour or so, I have a nice buzz going on. I’m heading into the kitchen from the backyard when a blonde girl bumps into my arm, spilling my drink onto the ground.
“Shit, I’m so sorry,” she cries. “It didn’t get on you, did it?”
I smile and shake my head. “No, you’re good.”
“Let me get you a new one, okay?”
I don’t argue with her. She hurries off inside and returns with a new red solo cup. It’s definitely not filled with the same beer I had in it beforehand.
“My brother lives here,” she tells me. “I know where he hides the good liquor.”
“Thanks,” I reply and look her over.
Her blonde hair is straight and hits the top of her shoulders. She’s wearing blue jeans and brown boots. Her top is white and tight fitting, with a v-shaped neckline that shows off a fantastic pair of tits.
“I’m Stella,” she informs me and puts her hand in mine. “My brother is Lucas.”
I don’t really know him, but I know of him, so I give her a nod and say, “I’m Kyler.”
We chat for a bit, and she laughs at my jokes. Her hand sometimes goes to my forearm as she speaks to me. We’re only interrupted when Dylan comes out onto the back porch to smoke. He lets me take a few hits of his joint before telling me he thinks he saw Alivia inside with her friend Alice.
“Stella, will you excuse us for a second?” I say with a smile her way. “I have a friend here I want to say hi to.”
“For sure,” she replies. “I’ll be out here if you’d like some company later on.”
It’s been a month and a half since I’ve hooked up with anyone. The last time was only a day or so before I met Alivia. Since then, she’s all I’ve been able to think about. Looking over Stella, I take her innuendo and push it to the back of my head for now. I follow Dylan inside, but just as I enter the threshold of the kitchen, he turns and pushes back on my chest gently.
“I think we should go back outside,” he says quietly.
“What? Why?” I question.
He swallows and mutters, “Kyler, c’mon, man, let’s just go outside. That girl seemed into you. We should work on that.”
“She can wait,” I insist. “If Liv’s here, I want to see her.”
“Kyler,” he warns lowly.
I shove his chest as gently as I can despite my annoyance growing. Once I’m past him, my eyes immediately hit the couple in the corner of the kitchen. Scott stands between her legs, while Alivia sits on the edge of the countertop. His hands are on her ass, hers in his hair. My jaw clenches hard, but I can’t pull my eyes away from them making out like sixteen year olds. I want to fucking rip him off of her and tell him she’s mine. I don’t have a single right, but my body tenses, ready to do it.
“Kyler, c’mon,” Dylan mumbles.
“I’m fine,” I declare.
“Let’s just go home,” he replies.
“I said I’m fine.”
I turn back to the backyard and down the dark liquor in my cup on the way out. Stella smiles when she sees me.
“Hey, your friend not show?” she asks sweetly.
I shake my head. “No, but what do you think about sharing that bottle?”
She grabs my hand and starts pulling us inside. “I’ll go get it. Let’s go to the living room. I want to sit.”
Right before I hit the doorway, Dylan puts a hand on my chest to stop me. My jaw clenches, and I glare at him.
“You guys chat,” Stella says. “I’ll get the whiskey, and you meet me in the living room, okay?”
I give her a nod and watch her disappear inside before I look back to Dylan and brush his hand off of me.
“Kyler, man, you’ve drank a lot already,” he chastises. “We should just go.”
“Since when are you Mr. Responsible? Get the fuck out of my way,” I snap.
“You’re not fine,” he retorts. “Let me just get Noah and the others, and we can go.”
“Dylan, if you tell me we need to leave one more time, I’ll knock your fucking teeth out.”
“You’re being fucking stupid!”
“You know what’s stupid? Sitting around waiting for her to fucking choose me,” I bite back angrily. “I fucking waited, I was patient. I’m not doing it anymore, man. Okay? Let me go. If she wants him, she can have him, and I’ll find someone else to give me what I need.”
Dylan lets out a sigh and says, “I’m sorry, Kyler.”
He steps out of my way then. I push my way inside, not bothering to look at Scott and Alivia. I’m just about out of the kitchen when I hear her call my name. I freeze, shut my eyes, and let out a breath. Then I keep going. I don’t look back, I don’t respond, I don’t do anything. I head into the living room and sit on the couch next to Stella. She passes me a joint before taking a swig from the
whiskey bottle. We trade after a moment.
The whiskey burns my throat, but I relish in the warmth that spreads through my body. From the couch, I can see Ayden bring a brunette up the stairs, probably looking for an empty bedroom to escape into. I have no idea where Noah or Oliver are, but as I take another swig of the whiskey, I can’t say that I care. Dylan stands in the corner of the room with a cup in his hand. He’s talking to a girl, but he faces me on the couch so he can continuously look at me as he talks.
It’s not long before the joint is finished between me and Stella. We finish the bottle of whiskey shortly after that. Dylan’s still keeping a watchful eye on me. Sick of it, I stand from the couch and pull Stella up with me. Hand in hand, we move toward the stairs. We get to the second floor, and before we can even get into a room, Stella pushes me into a door, pulling me down and crashing her lips to mine. My hands grip her hips as hers move down to my chest. Our tongues dance and our breathing is the only thing I can hear.
“Do you think my brother will kill me if he finds out I fucked you in his bed?” she breathes out when our mouths separate.
“One way to find out,”
She grins and begins to lead me to the bedroom at the end of the hall. We’re walking past the bathroom, when the door opens. Alivia’s eyes widen slightly when she takes in the situation.
“Kyler,” she exhales. “I, um, I saw you downstairs. You might not have heard me.”
“I heard you,” I retort.
“Kyler,” Stella says, her eyes hungry. “Are we going?”
“Are you mad at me?” Alivia asks, her eyes glancing down at my hand that’s intertwined with Stella’s.
I shake my head once. “Why would I be mad?”
“You’re acting weird,” she insists.
“Weird? As in what? As in I’m not sitting around and waiting for you anymore?”
“I’ll just wait for you in the bedroom, Kyler, okay?” Stella says, completely ignoring Alivia.
She walks off and Alivia says, “What’re you talking about? I think I’ve been pretty honest about what this is.”
“And what is it, Liv? Tell me.”
“You’re drunk.”
I clench my jaw, biting my tongue so I don’t say anything I’ll regret. I’m not that drunk.
“We can talk about it when you’re sober,” Alivia adds quietly. “I don’t want to argue.”
“Argue about what?” I snap and run my hands through my hair. “You’re the only one fucking arguing. I just want to go, okay? So, move.”
“Tell me what I did,” she begs. “We’re friends, and I value that.”
I roll my eyes. “Friends? I don’t want to be friends. I’ve made that pretty fucking clear to you, Liv. I want so much more than that and you fucking know it. You want it, too.”
“Kyler, I’m with Scott.”
I throw my hands up and bark, “I fucking know you’re with Scott, Alivia. I know! Okay? You only tell me every damn day. It fucking kills me every time you say it. I want you, and you don’t want me. So, now, I’m moving on. Just let me move on.”
“Okay,” she mutters, her eyes teary.
“Don’t cry,” I order lowly as a tear slips down her cheek. “Liv, don’t.”
“I just don’t want you to hate me.”
I run my hands through my hair and again. “I could never hate you, Livy. I just need some time, okay?”
“Can I at least give you a hug?” she asks tearfully.
I shake my head. “I should go.”
She finally steps aside. I walk past her and to the bedroom. I don’t look back. Stella’s on the bed in just her panties. My eyes skim over her tits first and finally land on her face. She smiles coyly at me and crooks her finger at me, telling me to come to her. I pull my shirt over my head, unbutton my jeans, and put a knee to the bed. Stella leans up, kisses me hard, and runs her hands down my abs, one dipping further into my pants. I’m hard and ready as she kisses me deeper, and my hand goes to her panties and tears them down her legs.
“Flip over,” I order lowly.
She flips onto her stomach eagerly. On her elbows and knees, I run a hand over her ass. I free myself from my pants with one hand and pull her back into me. In one swift motion, I’m inside her. She’s fucking warm, tight, and all the relief I need. I fuck her hard, and she takes every inch of it, moaning and panting. And for the first time since I met her, I don’t think about Alivia.
◆◆◆
Chapter Seven
Alivia
There’s only a few weeks left until our performance for Professor Fields’s class. I only ever really see Kyler when we’re practicing for it or when we’re actually in the lecture room. He doesn’t sit next to me anymore, though, his space often being taken up by Noah. He had told me a couple weeks ago that Kyler is actively dating someone. I’m still unsure how I feel about the whole thing.
That night, I’m sitting on the couch at Kyler’s apartment. Dylan sits on the floor with his guitar, Noah in the armchair with his laptop, and Kyler sitting a seat away from me with his own guitar. Ayden has a study group, so he isn’t able to practice tonight. I have my notebook open with a handwritten song. We’ve been sitting in the living room for at least an hour, barely getting anything done.
“Can we get this going?” Kyler asks us. “I have shit to do.”
“No, you don’t,” Noah retorts. “Relax, man.”
I sigh heavily. “If you don’t like the song, then we can do something you wrote."
Kyler doesn’t look at me as he says, “It’s not that I don’t like it. I just don’t understand your story.”
I can’t exactly tell him that the song is about him, about losing him. Instead, I say “It’s about… It’s about losing something and not realizing what you had until it’s too late.”
He looks at me then, eyes blazing. Suddenly, he stands with his guitar in his hand at his side.
“I’m done with this,” he says lowly.
“Kyler,” Dylan warns. “C’mon, don’t be like that.”
“I said I’m done.”
He storms off to his bedroom, the door slamming closed behind him. I close my eyes to hide the tears that are forming. I hear Noah let out a sigh, and I finally look over at him and begin packing my backpack up.
“You don’t have to leave, Liv,” Noah says softly. “I don’t know what his problem is.”
“I know what his problem is,” I insist. “It’s me. And I don’t want to make anything worse.”
“Maybe you should talk to him,” Dylan tells me. “He’s with someone, but sometimes I think he just needs a little bit of closure. I know you were just friends, and he valued that just like you. Maybe a conversation will help.”
“I don’t even know what I’d say,” I mumble.
“Please, Liv,” Dylan begs. “I need him to get it together. Our gigs are suffering, he’s a fucking asshole to work with lately. Please, talk to him.”
Seeing Dylan like this, vulnerable and pleading, I can’t say no. He’s asking me to help, and it is the mess I made. Finally, I nod, and shift my backpack so it’s just wrapped around one of my shoulders.
“I’ll go talk to him,” I mutter.
“Thank you,” Dylan replies sincerely.
Noah gives me a reassuring nod. I let out a breath and head to his room. I lift my hand to knock, pause, but finally complete the action.
“Fuck off,” Kyler barks from the other side of the door.
I knock again, more forceful this time.
“I said fuck off, Noah, okay?” I hear.
This time, instead of knocking, I open the door. The small speaker on his nightstand is playing Wish You Were Here by Incubus. He tosses his notebook and pen to the end of the bed when he sees it’s me, not Noah. I close the door behind me and drop my backpack next to it.
“What do you want?” he asks quietly.
“You to be my friend,” I whisper in response.
He gives me a shake of his head. �
�I can’t. Not right now.”
“What does that even mean?” I cry and move to sit at the edge of his bed. “I’m not trying to ruin anything for you, Kyler. Things are good with you and your girlfriend. And I’m good with my boyfriend. There’s no reason we can’t be friends.”
“Livy, you don’t understand.”
“Then help me understand.”
Kyler shakes his head and stands up from his bed. He runs his hands through his hair. “My feelings don’t go away after a couple of weeks, Livy. When I’m with Stella, all I can feel is relief. I’m so fucking relieved that for once I can forget all about you. When I’m with her, you’re nothing but a person. Then, the minute I’m alone, all I think about is you.”
Tears prick my eyes; a couple slip down my cheeks. He sighs and sits next to me, his arm wrapping around my shoulders and pulling me tightly against him. His forehead presses against my temple.
“Please, don’t cry,” he whispers. “I hate when you cry.”
“I don’t want you to forget all about me, Kyler,” I cry out softly and wipe away the tears that continue to fall.
He lets out a ragged breath. His arm tightens around me. I look up at him, his hazel eyes gazing into mine.
“I’ll always be your friend, Liv. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I developed feelings when I shouldn’t have. That’s my problem, and I’m sorry for making it yours,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry. I respect you so fucking much, and I’m sorry I haven’t been treating you like I should be.”
“Can I hug you now?” I ask in a whisper.
He gives me a small smile, and hugs me to him. His face dips into my neck. My arms go around him, and I close my eyes. We’d be okay. Or at least I could hope.
◆◆◆
Two weeks later and we were days away from the showcase. I’m headed to meet Mackenzie for a quick lunch on campus when I run into them. Them, as in Kyler and his girlfriend. I honestly had never seen her any other time after that night at the party. Seeing them together in a normal setting, walking across campus, laughing and bantering, gave me the worst feeling in the world. She’s so pretty, exactly someone who you would expect Kyler to be with.
