“In simple terms.” He shrugged.
“You got this.” I told him, “I mean look at you. You’re gorgeous, smart, funny, loving and kind and he’s just, well, he’s just Vinnie. You two are perfect for each other. You’re going to be so good together.”
“Yeah, well don’t go planning our wedding or anything just yet hot stuff.” He joked.
“Red, you know wedding planning is Dana’s thing, not mine.” I shoved him playfully.
“She can never know about this!” He stage whispered, eyes wide with horror.
“Never.” I crossed my heart and mimed locking my lips and throwing away the key.
“So, tell me about hot cop.” Jared changed the subject. I shook my head frantically and pointed to my sealed lips.
“Ah no!” he laughed. “You don’t get off that easily. I told you mine now you tell me yours. Mick informs me there’s quite the story there gorgeous and I want it all. Spill!”
“Mick’s full of shit.” I huffed.
“Not where you’re concerned, you’re his number one girl Cal, you know that. If it’s caught his attention then it’s big news, so I need to make sure this fella is worthy.” Jared told me.
“Ugh, alright.” I caved and gave him a quick summary of the car crash that was Adam and me. “Adam is my friend, except friend isn’t really a big enough word. He’s been there for me. A lot. He wants more, but I’m scared shitless Red, a bit like you and V except I have all these fucked up feelings for Jase getting in the way too. I don’t want him back, and I know what I feel for him isn’t love in the way it used to be, but I can’t just turn off my feelings for him overnight.”
“So, basically Adam is in love with you and you’re still in love with Jase then?” He said, a gleam in his eye.
“What? No. I’m not in love with Jase anymore. But I do still care about him.” I protested, “And as for Adam being in love with me, it’s nothing that serious.”
“So what was that this morning when he saw you and me together and ran out of here like a jealous lover?” He teased. “Have you seen yourself woman? You do realise there’s a reason I call you beautiful and hot stuff and gorgeous, right?”
“You call all the women you know those things Red.” I told him.
“Irrelevant. You need to let Jase go and let Adam in girl, that man can put the light back in your eyes.” He winked at me. I raised my eyebrows at him. “Ah Callie girl, it’s obvious that man is head over heels for you. And he doesn’t seem like a fella you’d want to be walking away from.”
“That’s what Mick says. Stupid know it all O’Rourke brothers.” I grumbled, walking down the bar to serve Ethan and Nate who had just taken seats there.
“Hey, you’ve still got time for breakfast if you’re quick.” I told them, knowing Nate liked his bacon in the mornings.
“Nah, we’re here for the cake today. Little bird tells me you made coffee cake, that’s what I want.” Nate said grinning at me then peering down the bar at Jared. “Is that Red?”
“Yup.” I nodded, cutting Nate a large slice of the cake and putting it by his spot at the bar while he went to say hello to Jared. “How about you Ethan?”
“I’ll take one or two of those chocolate muffins.” He grinned at me; the boy had a serious chocolate habit. “Unless you’ve got brownies hidden away somewhere?”
“Not today, but I can make some for after dinner tomorrow night. You’re coming aren’t you?” I asked him.
He nodded, “Wouldn’t miss it. Dan will be in heaven if you make brownies. No vodka though, I’m still hung over from the last time!” I laughed with him.
*****
Me: Hey, how’s work?
Adam: Quiet. It’s 3am Angel, are you okay?
Me: Fine.
Adam: Nightmare?
Me: Hmmm...
Adam: Wanna tell me about it?
Me: Same shit different night.
Adam: Need my arms?
Me: They’re not here.
Adam: They can be.
Me: No. I don’t want to disturb you at work just for a hug.
Adam: Angel you can always have a hug, it’s never a disturbance.
Me: Ha! If it were a disturbance you’d have to arrest me.
Adam: And now my head is full of innuendos about you in handcuffs. I’ll be there in 10
Me: I’ll make coffee. You can tell me handcuff jokes.
Ten minutes later, true to his word, I was pulled into Adam’s arms when he let himself into my house. Adam had come into the pub later in the day for the cake I’d saved him, but it was busy with lunchtime customers by then. We hadn’t hired a new chef since Kat because we were still hoping she was coming back to us, so we had reduced the menu and Kaden and I were taking turns in the kitchen. That’s where I had been when Adam came back in and we hadn’t had chance to talk much. Instead Jared had cornered him and given him the third degree. Adam told me about it, saying Jared wasn’t the first person who had demanded to know his intentions towards me. I knew Mick and he had had that conversation, but I wondered who else. Cam was probably a good bet, maybe Nick, but Adam wasn’t telling.
We sat on the stools in the kitchen and shared our cup of coffee as we talked, in hushed voices so as not to wake Cameron, about nothing and everything. I loved these late night conversations with Adam, we were slowly finding out everything about each other. Yet, although Adam had told me he was happy to wait for me, I couldn’t help but feel as though I was leading him on. With my feelings for him getting stronger, but my feelings for Jase not waning, I felt as though I was running around in circles. I knew I couldn’t move forward with Adam until I had completely gotten over Jase and that, I reminded myself, wasn’t going to happen overnight. And I felt terrible for running hot and cold with Adam all the time, poor man probably didn’t know whether he was coming or going with me. It never seemed to bother him, but he was a man after all, it must be getting to him. I sighed heavily.
“I can hear you thinking over there. What’s wrong Angel?” he questioned me.
“We can’t keep doing this Adam.” I decided, not willing to mess with his feelings any longer.
“Doing what exactly?” he frowned and it bothered me that I was once again the reason for his frown.
“This. Us, Adam. I don’t want you to think I’m leading you on. I feel like such a bitch.” I sighed again. “I’m messing you around.”
“Angel...” He began.
“No Adam, seriously. We have to stop. It’s not like this can ever go anywhere.” I blurted.
“What?” He frowned.
“Adam, the probability of me even being alive this time next year is slim. I won’t bring you into that. I can’t allow this to go any further, whether I want it to or not. Adam I...”
“Stop! Stop right now!” His voice was harsh and made my eyes go wide. He had never spoken to me that way before.
“You can’t think that way Angel, I won’t let you. And as for this leading me on shit, unless that’s your way of telling me to get lost you can stop that too. You’re not leading me on Angel. If you hadn’t been completely honest with me about the way you feel, then yes, that would be leading me on. But I know you’re not ready for us to be more than friends and I’m not going anywhere in spite of that. I’m under no illusions about where I stand with you Angel and I’m choosing to be here anyway. I’m choosing you. Every time Angel. It’s always going to be you.” He reached out, pulling me off my stool and closer to him, resting his hands on my hips as I stood between his outstretched legs. “I know it annoyed you that I had a jealous tantrum over Jared, it wasn’t the first time and I’m not proud of it. I’m sorry, I should have trusted you and got the full story, sometimes I lose my head a little bit where you’re concerned. But you need to know there is absolutely no fucking way I am giving up our time together. So stop pushing me away Angel and trust that I am exactly where I want to be. Okay?”
“Okay.” I whispered and leaned into his embrace. I still didn’t
feel completely comfortable with our situation, but he had made it perfectly clear he wasn’t about to let anything change and if I was honest with myself, I didn’t want it to, so I didn’t argue.
*****
Adam: Morning Angel.
Me: Afternoon. ;p
Adam: Comedian. Night shift remember? ;)
Me: How could I forget? Good sleep?
Adam: I dreamt about you.
Me: Do I want to know?
Adam: It was a good dream. Maybe I’ll show you one day.
Me: Maybe I’ll let you one day. You working tonight?
Adam: No, dinner with Greg and Dana to look forward to.
Me: Is Dana cooking?
Adam: I hope not. Pub later?
Me: Doubt it. Cooking for Nick and the boys.
Adam: Call me if you need my arms again.
Me: I always need your arms. They’re the best.
Adam: They are pretty awesome.
*****
Nick, Cam, Ethan and I were sitting around our dining table after eating dinner together with Nick’s brothers. Danny and Heath had moved into the living room to play on the games console and were sprawled across the sofa, Danny having been thoroughly satisfied with the brownies I had made them. He and I had spent some time together while I was cooking dinner, discussing how it was actually ok that neither of us had our lives figured out yet and he seemed brighter for it. Both Nick and Ethan had always known what they wanted to do and Heath had a pretty strong calling to the military, yet Danny had no idea what he wanted out of life and that bothered him. I told him if push came to shove there would always be work at the pub for him until he figured it out. I knew Mick would take him on, especially now it looked like the two of us might be busy with other plans.
I’d always spent a lot of time with the Warren boys growing up, and had been there for them when their Mum died and Nick had to work. I’d often picked them up from school and taken them to my place and made them dinner, that kind of thing. I hadn’t realised just how much they’d come to rely on me in that respect, Danny in particular, and I silently vowed to make more time for them as I watched the youngest two brothers from the dining table. Danny confessed to being the one Mick had seen giving Jase a talking to, I couldn’t be angry with him when he told me I was basically his big sister and he was just taking care of me. I loved those Warren boys.
I cooked pork chops at Nick’s request- his favourite, and now Cam and Nick were arguing their case for not clearing up. Apparently they were both of the opinion that whoever made the mess should clean it. I knew they were ganging up together to wind me up, it was what they did. I was simply getting ready to bang their heads together.
“Thought we were going to the pub anyway?” Nick asked, “Ethan said he’ll take Dan and Heath home for me. I’m a free man!” Nick had no problem allowing the younger two to be home alone during the day, coming and going from school and what not, but he never left them alone at night. Either he or Ethan or one of the rest of us was always there.
“Yep, you should go out.” Ethan encouraged.
“We are going to the pub.” Cam said, clapping his hands together. “And the boys can clean the kitchen up!”
“I’m not going.” I told them, “I spend enough time there as it is.”
“Behind the bar, not in front of it, that’s the point. You need to spend time with us Moonbeam.” Nick argued, downing the remainder of his beer.
“What are we doing now then, if not spending time together?” I argued.
“You’re coming.” Cam told me, “You are not staying here alone and I want to have a drink with my sister. Adam will be there.”
“So?” I raised my eyebrows at him. I knew full well Adam was going to be there but despite his assurances I was still feeling a little odd about seeing him. Something had shifted in our relationship since our 3am talk. I couldn’t shake that feeling of leading him on and I was in complete confusion over the whole thing. I needed time to sort my messy head out.
“So, you know you want to see him. Don’t deny it twin.” Cam winked at me from across the table.
“Why would I give a fuck if Adam is in the pub or not?” I said, a little too sharply, which of course didn’t go un-noticed.
“You give so many fucks they’re visible from space Cal.” Cameron laughed, shaking his head at me.
“You’ve got a whole Great Wall of China made of fucks given for Adam.” Nick joined in and Ethan laughed with them.
“Why do I keep you two around?” I sighed, going back to my plan to bang their heads together.
“You’d never manage without us.” Cam stated simply with a shrug.
“Yep, we’re awesome and you need us for life stuff.” Nick backed him up.
“And besides, Adam always wants to see you.” Cam pushed, that evil glint that he got when he was winding me up had appeared in his eye.
“And?” I was exasperated.
“And you love him!” Nick sang at me.
I bit. “What? Don’t start all that again Nick. There’s enough of that shit going on around here. My own brother is even conspiring against me now, don’t think I haven’t noticed all your whispered conversations with Adam, Cam. What’s that about?”
“Rambling Cal.” Nick reached out and put a finger on my lips to shush me.
“Don’t you shush me!” I mumbled around his finger. He laughed. So I opened my mouth and sucked that finger of his. Hard.
“Had that hand wrapped around my dick before I came over here.” he said, straight faced.
I gagged.
“Although having felt the power of that suck I’m thinking your mouth could do a better job than my hand.” he joked.
“Shut up! Shut Up! Shut up!” Cam put his hands over his ears and moaned. “That’s my sister dude. Fuck, she’s practically your sister!”
“You’re sick. That’s what I’m calling you from now on, sick Nick!” I told him, pushing him off his chair onto the wooden floor.
“I thought we were getting married? I see what’s going on here. You’re dumping me for Adam. Don’t leave me darlin’, you’re my life. Who will wash my dirty underwear if you leave me? How will I ever get over the power of that suck? My hand just won’t cut it now! We can work it out. I love you so much Moonbeam, give me another chance!” He managed to spout between guffaws, while rolling around on the floor.
*****
Jared was working behind the bar that night. He served us our drinks and we joined Luke, Nate, Liv and Vinnie at a table. There was a definite stand-off happening between Vinnie and Jared and I eyed Vinnie as I sat down, letting him know that we would be having a chat about it soon.
“You’re going to come aren’t you Cal?” Liv jumped down my throat as soon as we were seated.
“Where?” I asked, curling my legs up underneath me in my chair.
“Dana’s having a sleep over party next weekend. She invited Sally and Natalie. Girls only.” She explained, pushing her glasses back up her nose.
“Aren’t we a bit old for that?” My brow furrowed, I knew exactly how a sleepover at Dana’s would go. It would be an alcohol fuelled group counselling session with nail painting and facemasks. Nope, not entering that hell dimension thank you very much. “And, we’re not allowed to do anything girls only anymore. Actually I’m not allowed to do anything without my own personal bodyguard anymore.”
“Callie!” Cam whined and we shared a look that let him know I was only joking and let me know he just wanted me safe.
“It’s on Saturday and your own personal bodyguard will be in residence. Greg and Adam are both off work and will be upstairs in Adam’s place.” Liv said and glared at me in a way that told me without words that I had better get my arse there or she’d never speak to me again.
“Which is exactly where I will be if I get my way.” Nat announced as she and Sally joined us, sitting either side of Liv on a sofa. Cam and Nick both looked expectantly to me for a reaction. I just raised my eyebrows a
t them. Nat took a sip of her vodka and coke and looked at me. “Come on Cal, I mean I know you had Jase, who is sex on a stick but even you have to have noticed, Adam is hotness personified!”
“Oh, she’s noticed.” Vinnie confirmed with a sly smile.
“And he has definitely noticed her!” Liv giggled.
“He hasn’t noticed anyone but her.” Vinnie agreed.
“Are you and Adam?” Luke started as he leant forward in his seat to look at me.
“Friends!” I interrupted and Luke held his hands up in surrender.
“Oh, you are so much more than friends.” Liv shook her head.
“Talk of the devil.” Nate nodded towards the bar where Greg, Dana and Adam were ordering drinks.
“Well, if you’re not going to make a move on him, I will.” Nat said, standing and walking towards the bar.
“Say something!” Liv shot forward in her seat and ordered me through gritted teeth. I shrugged and watched with interest as Natalie sidled up beside Adam and spoke to him. He turned, looked down at her and nodded once before seeking my eyes out with his own and making a beeline for me. Sally snorted into her drink. Nat caught my eye and we both burst out laughing.
“Witch, that man is like your own personal heat seeking missile.” Vinnie fanned himself dramatically. I had to admit, Adam’s reaction made me feel a little bit warm and tingly inside.
“Angel.” Adam greeted me with eyes only for me and an intimate smile as he sat down on the arm rest of the over sized chair I was curled up in. He put an arm around the back of the chair and planted a kiss the top of my head before greeting the others. He obviously wasn’t going to be hiding his feelings anymore, more like he was putting his claim on me. And nope, not thinking about it now, it’s all good, nothing to panic about. Nat reached across him and fist bumped me as she re-joined us and sat down with Greg and Dana.
“A sleepover?” I asked Dana, a hint of accusation in my voice. I mean really, were we ten?
“Yeps!” She nodded and her curls bounced.
Nopes!” I countered. Cam couldn’t contain his choked laughter.
“Oh don’t be such a negative Nelly. It’ll be fun. They won’t let us have a girl’s night out, so we’ll have to have to improvise.” She chirruped excitedly. I blinked. What did she just call me? Adam squeezed my shoulder but failed to hide the smirk when I looked up at him.
Educating Callie Page 21
