by Layla Pierce
Stephen has already hopped to the ground and throws open the door, but I hold up my hand to silence him. Cole looks away and I purse my lips together. "Stephen, back up top at your station. Things are just as they should be."
"Yes, m'lady." He gives me a curious look, and I nod my head toward Cole. My blond guard seems more insightful than others and gives me a nod in return as he climbs back up top and calls for the driver to move.
The carriage lurches for a few paces until the horses find their rhythm and the ride smooths out. I turn to Cole and reach out for his chin. He doesn't flinch but he does go stiff giving me the distinct impression I'm making him uncomfortable. "Why would I want Stephen when you always ride with me to keep me safe?"
"Well..." He stammers and I shake my head.
"Because you heard about him sharing my bed?"
"Well-- I mean, yeah and..."
"And Aiden and Graham in the garden?"
"Yes, my queen."
"And you think I don't enjoy your company?"
He looks over at me and there is darkness in those eyes that I've never seen before. "I know what I am, m'lady. I don't expect--"
"You know what you are? Cole, what does that even mean?"
"It's just that." He looks away and then I see where his eyes settle at. Deep scars cover the backs of his hand and I reach out to lightly caress them. He does flinch this time and I pull back.
"I don't know what you assume I think of you Cole, but I can assure you I don't think any less of you. Not for any reason."
My heart breaks for him. Of all my guards, he has the most reason to be cold and hard. And yet he maintains that innocent glow. I don't understand why he would think of himself as anything less than amazing. That is how I see him. Anyone who could survive what he did and come out of it with their sanity intact is worthy of respect and admiration.
The carriage slows again and comes to a stop. "We're here your highness." The driver calls out.
Before I can finish my conversation with Cole the door opens and Stephen stands with his hand extended for me. I pat Cole's hand and whisper, "We will finish this later."
He nods and smiles. It's not a real smile but I appreciate the fact that he tried. "As you wish, my queen."
Cole stays behind. His job will be scouting for any threats from a distance as Stephen escorts me through the village. We make our way through the streets quickly, it's my job to inspect each town to ensure that their food stores are filled and they are prepared for the coming winter. This is the last village of the day, and just like the others before them, they are more than ready for the winter months ahead.
After an hour and with our job done I start to head back to the carriage with Stephen pulls me to a stop. "Yes?"
He smiles. "How about a pint?"
I arch a brow. "I can't very well just walk into a pub and throw back a pint like a normal person."
He grins. "One of these days, I'm going to steal you away for a day and treat you to a bit of pleasure."
I frown. "Just a bit?"
His hand pulls mine against his crotch and I feel his rigid cock. "Maybe more than a bit." He nods his head toward a small house. "I could give you a taste right now, my queen."
I absently rub my hand over him and ask, "Whose house is this?"
"My sisters, she's gone for the day. Don't worry."
I shake my head. Stephen groans and I stiffen. "What?" I manage to whisper.
He drags my hand to his crotch and shifts his cock in my palm. "You do such things to me, my queen." I smile while keeping my hand exactly where it is. He chuckles and asks. "Does that please you?"
I nod and let out a soft moan as he tugs me closer. We are exposed here in the open street but no one seems to be out, so I let him draw me against him.
Stephen shutters. "I want you... Sophie."
He says my name cautiously, as if not sure if he should dare speak it. I dart my tongue out to taste his salty skin of his neck. I've not taken that amount of initiative with Graham, but today I have a bit more courage to seek out what I want. "I like it when you say my name."
There's a rumble in his chest and I smile bigger. I'm finding way too much fun in teasing my poor guard. I can't help but rub my hand over his cock again and grin from ear to ear when he presses himself harder against me and warns with a shaky voice. "Don't tease me."
I lean up to whisper against his ear. "I'm the queen, I can tease you all I want."
I hear him swallow and it gives me the push to accentuate my point with my tongue as I run it over his earlobe and finish with a soft bite.
"God damn, I want you." He mutters.
I slip out of his grip and motion toward the carriage. "Come on, it's time we head home."
"To bed?" His eyes dance with humor and I laugh while shaking my head.
"Me to bed. You to your post," I pause and add, "outside of my room."
Stephen adjusts his hard cock in his pants and groans. "And what am I supposed to do about this?"
I shrug and saunter to the door. "You have two hands and an imagination. Use it."
He remains quiet on our walk to the carriage but when I step up on the stairs he leans in and treats me to a mental image that makes me wet. "I'll be sure to do that tonight, my queen, and I'll be imagining you on your knees sucking my cock as I come."
I close my eyes for a moment, willing my body to calm down. I don't say a word as I climb back into the carriage and Stephen closes the door behind me.
I crawl into my seat and fan myself with my hand to cool the fire in my cheeks. Cole appears at my side and helps me stretch out on the soft bench of the carriage. "A bit too much to drink, m'lady?"
I laugh. "No, we didn’t have time to stop at a pub.” His smile is alight when I answer. My smile fades into a yawn as the wear of the day starts to weigh on me. "I think I’ll need a nap after all the traveling today."
"Rest, m’lady.”
As I struggle to get comfortable there is no denying that my staff spoils me with comfort in the castle. While the bench is soft, the lack of pillows kinks my neck. "May I use you?" I whimper to Cole.
He coughs. "Pardon?"
I point to his thigh. "Pillow."
"Oh." He grins and scoots closer, unlatching the metal thigh guard on the leg closest to me. Gently he lifts my head and rests it on his thigh and I let out a sigh of relief. The elevation is just enough to release the pinch in my neck and I settle in for the long ride home.
My hand rests on his leg next to my cheek and I feel the raised area of a scar. As I lay there absently stroking the length of it I'm vaguely aware of Cole's stillness. In my exhaustion it doesn't register but as I hit a second wind of alertness I become acutely aware of the tension rolling off him. "Cole?"
He gives me an absent, "Hmmm?" but I know I don't have his attention.
"Cole." I reassert myself and he looks down at me.
"Yes?"
"What's bothering you?"
He shakes his head, and I start to move my hand away when another scar catches my attention. He stiffens again and I sit up. "Does it bother you to have me laying on you?"
"No, m'lady."
"Then what is wrong?"
"My scars, most people find them..." He stops and takes a breath. "Off-putting."
There is nothing off-putting about him. He is tall and handsome and loyal to a fault. As evident from the scars he bears. I know the stories, I know what his parents did to him before Graham's father rescued him and tried his parents for their crimes. But I hadn't realized the effect his childhood had on him now as an adult. I reach out and purposely rub his leg feeling the raised wounds. "There's nothing off-putting about them or you."
He smiles but it's forced and I settle back down on the bench, placing my head in his lap once more. "Do they hurt?"
Cole forces a laugh, I can hear the strain in it. "No, they stopped hurting a long time ago."
"I wish the guard had found out sooner and you wouldn't have had to endure
that."
His hand slips to my hair and lightly strokes the strands that have laid over my ear. "It all worked out, m'lady."
"But you were hurt." I protest.
"Everyone gets hurt, you can't stop it." He stops touching my hair and pulls his hand back. "You can't save everyone."
"Well, if I'm a good queen I can certainly try."
Cole laughs a little more naturally this time. "Well, you don't have to save me. I'm good right where I am."
"I liked it when you played with my hair." I muse.
"I think that's the exhaustion talking."
I glance up at him and he's looking at me with such intensity I shudder. "No, it's not."
I see his hand tremble a bit as he reaches back out and finds a strand of hair to wrap around his finger. "I could have Stephen come in here for you."
There's that offer again. I frown and sit up, this time giving myself a bit of a head rush and glare at him. "Alright, enough of this. What is it with you wanting Stephen to come in here?"
"I just thought you might like some comfort and I'm not--"
"Oh." My eyes go wide. "You're not into women. Why didn't you say so?"
He cocks his head to the side and arches a brow. "What?"
"I get it, you don't fancy women. I'm okay with that, I mean, you've seen my husband. Don't worry, I won't try to seduce you, Cole. I just enjoy your company."
"I'm not--" He stammers. "I like women just fine."
My brow draws tight as I look him up and down. "Then what is it? Why keep offering to switch places with Stephen. You know, I'm not making a move on you, I would never do anything to make you uncomfortable."
"I know you'd never make a move on me. That's why I offered to get Stephen. In case you did want some comfort."
I feel like something is getting lost between us and for the life of me I can't figure it out. "I don't need comfort from anyone. And for the record, I didn't say I'd never make a move on you. I mean look at you, you are gorgeous, I'm just not trying to jump you right this very minute."
His smile pulls tight at the edges of his lips. "Funny. Real funny."
"What?" I'm so confused by the conversation and frustrated that my temper is starting to boil over. "Out with whatever you are accusing me of."
"You would never want someone like me." My mouth falls open and all I can do it blink. "Like all the others, the minute you saw the damage done to me you'd change your mind. I'd rather things just stay how they've always been, it hurts too much to be--" he stops short and refuses to say anymore.
I'm still reeling from his confession and for several minutes I stay silent. There's a wall of tension between us now and it's something I'm not familiar with. Especially not with my innocent kind guard. "Cole, I--"
When I reach for him he pulls away and I can feel the hurt rolling off of him, but at the same time I'm angry that he'd categorize me with other women who've rejected him. I ball my fists and square my shoulders. "You must not know me very well, Cole. I am not one to say things I do not mean and when I say you are gorgeous I mean it. Your scars don't distract from that, it shows how strong you are. It shows how much power you have to endure all of that and still keep going.
He snorts and shakes his head. "That's because you haven't seen them."
Point taken. I nod and lean back in my seat, I motion for him to stand and demand, "Remove your clothes then. Let me look at you and form my own opinion."
"That's crazy." Cole protests.
"Is it? You seem to think you know my mind better than I do. So, if your entire argument hinges on what other women have said or done, then at least do me the courtesy of letting me have a mind of my own." He stares at me and I lean forward. "Now, disrobe." He blinks and I clear my throat. "Do you need me to repeat the order?"
"Please don't make me do this." He whispers.
I soften the minute he pleads and slump back in my seat, all the angry drains from my face and I look up at him with sorrowful eyes. "I don't want to humiliate you, Cole. I just wanted to make a point. I am not turned off by your scars. I think you are beautiful. Please trust me that I am telling you the truth."
He sits back down and lulls his head to the side to look at me. "I don't doubt that you think I'm handsome, but no one wants to have relations with a cripple, m'lady."
The word strikes me as odd and I can't quite wrap my head around it. "Scars don't make you--"
"It's not the scars, Sophie."
There's a softness in his voice and I'm caught off guard by him using my name. I open my mouth but no words come out. As if sensing my confusion, my guard removes the metal plates strapped to his other thigh and calve. He hesitates for a moment before lifting up his pant leg to reveal an artificial leg. It's intricate in its design, made of metal and wood. My hand moves but I stop and look over at him. "I had no idea."
"I function just fine and I didn't want anyone to know, especially not you. Graham agreed that as long as it never interfered with my duties that he'd keep it secret. And the royal engineers have kept it private on Graham’s orders."
"Why didn't you want me to know?"
His eyes dart away and focus on the floor. "I didn't want to be removed from your service."
"You're not going anywhere, ever, do you understand me." He nods but still refuses to look at me. "May I?"
His gaze snaps to mine and I motion to his leg. He nods and pulls the fabric up higher. I reach over and run my fingertips over the smooth wooden finish. "How did it happen?" Cole swallows and I feel like an idiot for asking such a blunt question. "I'm sorry, you don't have to answer."
"It was an infection from one of my wounds after I was rescued. It was spreading and the only way to save my life was to take my leg. The doctor said I was lucky to only lose it from the knee down." He seems to relax a bit and taps a spot at his knee that gives a very distinct metal sound. "It's a pretty ingenious device the engineers have made for me. After all these years I've adjusted well, they've improved their design over time, and no one is the wiser."
I lean back and he rolls down his pant leg. "Including me."
"I'm sorry, my queen."
I shake my head. "Don't you dare apologize, you have nothing to be sorry for." I offer him a soft smile. "And I prefer when you call me, Sophie."
His grin spread and this time it is genuine, I feel a flutter in my stomach but also a tingle of heat spreading in my core. "I'll try to remember that, Sophie."
My name sounds exquisite on his lips and I bite my lip. "Can I ask you something?"
He nods. "I think we're past asking permission for questions at this point."
"These women who you said have..." my words trail off, I'm not even sure what I want to ask or how to word it.
Cole finishes my thought. "Turned me down?"
"They were wrong to do that."
He chuckles. "That's not really a question."
Blowing out a breath I shrug. "I know. I don't know what I wanted to ask really, I just want you to know that not all women are like that. Haven't you found anyone who--"
"No." He cuts me off and looks away. "They get one look at me and either laugh or run away."
"That's horrible."
He looks at me and I feel the weight of tension in the air. "I can't blame them,"
"I can." I pause and look him up and down. "So does that mean you're a virgin?"
His head sort of lulls back and forth, like a nod of the head to answer yes while shaking it to say no. "It's a little more complicated than all that."
I frown. "I don't understand."
"I haven't had sex, so yes, I'm a virgin. It doesn't mean I haven't had some experience. Some somethings can be done that don't require the full removal of clothes."
My cheeks heat up and I glance down at his lap. "Ooooh."
"Yeah." He grins and leans his head back. "So you don't have to feel too sorry for me. It's not all bad."
"I would never feel sorry for you, but I do think you're missing out."
> Cole looks at me, staring at my lips and licks his own. "I'd ask if you'd like to help me with that, but I know you and Stephen and the others have something going."
It's my turn to laugh and I shake my head. "Then you definitely don't know the whole truth, do you?"
He's still focusing on my mouth when he absently asks, "What's the whole truth?"
I blush. "Graham is...Um." I twist my hands in my lap and look away. I don't know how to explain to him what has happened when I can’t figure it out myself. And even more importantly I can't put mine and Graham's relationship into words. It's always been a difficult task.
"Oh, you and Graham? I thought--"
I look up at him with pleading eyes. I don't want him to think less of me or judge me but something in the way he looks at me tells me he won't do either. "I was cold one night and Graham and Stephen kept me warm." I wave my hand. "All in all, that was very innocent."
"But?" He urges.
I sigh and as much as I hate anyone knowing how Leo treats me in private I decide to confide in Cole. "Leo is up to something." He nods in agreement so I continue. "The other day he undermined me and when I confronted him he was very cruel. Graham and Aiden were there and after Leo left they both… Well," I look away and whisper, "They both comforted me." I don't dare meet his gaze right now, so I just continue. "Stephen was with me today in town, there was a sort of intimate moment, but--"
Cole moves closer and takes my hand and his skin is so warm it makes me shiver. "They've all had you?"
There wasn't condemnation in his voice, more like curiosity. I glance up to see him so close to me. "No, nothing like that."
"Does the king know?"
"The king basically told me to have as much sex as I want because I won't be having any with him."
Cole makes a growling sound deep in his chest. "What a fool."
I smile. "That's nice, but Leo's not really to blame."
"Maybe not, but he doesn't have to be an ass about it." He intertwines his fingers with mine and raises my hand to his mouth to place a chaste kiss against the back of my hand. "But you are right, he is up to something."
"You were following him that day, did you see anything?"
"Not as much as I wanted, he and the Duke took their meeting to a private room and I couldn't get to a hidden chamber to spy on them in time. I'm sorry."
