by Vivian Lux
The noise I made startled me. But it sounded exactly like the sound my heart was making inside of my chest. A rumbling, possessive fury that was like nothing I had ever felt. Feeling her, pressed up against the wall, underneath me, had me completely outside of my head. What was this? Who was I? Why did I like the way I had her, pinned like this?
Was it because I knew I finally had her and she couldn't get away?
I moved my finger over the tight little bud of her clit, watching her as her eyes widened and the rolled back in her head. She sagged against my chest, relying on my strength to keep from falling over as she dissolved into a puddle in my arms. "Liv," I breathed into her hair, "Liv, aw fuck, that's right, right here, I told you I would show you what I was going to do, this is it, right here. This is what I would do. This and more, baby, there's so much more. I've got you, I've got you right here, ah, shit, you're cumming yes, I want to feel you, let go, let go for me, I've got you, I'm not letting go. I swear to fucking Christ I'm never fucking letting you go."
She buried her face into my neck and fucking screamed against me, shattering from the inside out. My fingers inside of her were nearly crushed by the force of the orgasm that tore through her like wildfire. But I wasn't done. I wasn't done at all.
"Brad," she said, and all at once, my name was the only thing she seemed capable of saying. "Brad, Brad, fuck, Brad," over and over, like a chant. Like a prayer. Driven mad by my name on her lips, I yanked my jeans down. My cock sprang free, already achingly hard for her.
Her chanting became more wild, more savage, my name twisting around until she wasn't saying "Brad" anymore.
She was saying yes.
I didn't have a condom. Fuck, I didn't think I was going to do this in a fucking alleyway behind the bar. "Yes!" Olivia, whisper-screamed, closing her long fingers around my length. "Please," she begged.
Goddamn.
She said please.
I was fucking done for.
"Oh. Oh, fuck." Sliding into her raw, bare, skin against skin like this... I could feel everything... everything.... "Olivia...fuck!" I was babbling. I was surprised I was even still capable of speech.
Olivia moaned, arching up against me. "More," she pleaded.
"Say it again for me."
"Say what?"
"Say please." I needed it. Needed it.
"Fuck you, Brad."
I drove into her, hard, and her eyes rolled back in her head. "Say it."
"Unh...," she moaned against me.
I was an animal. I could only take what I wanted. I drove into her, higher and harder. She blinked, and then a ragged, gasping shriek tore from her throat.
"Brad," she cried, and it was either ecstasy or tears in her voice. "Yes. Please, Christ, please fuck me, Brad."
Something exploded in my chest. I crushed her against me. I believed - in that one, white-hot moment - that I could fuse with her, that we could actually become one, and that belief was so powerful because she wanted me.
No.
She needed me.
She needed me the way I needed her. I could feel her shatter, that last wall between us falling. I sought her mouth, crushing it against mine, letting her scream out her orgasm against me even as I came so fucking hard I almost blacked out.
I came inside of her.
"Shit," I whispered, hot tendrils still snaking through my body and making me shudder.
"It's okay," she whispered, kissing me. "I'm on the pill. It's fine. It's so fine."
Chapter 17
Olivia
My face was wet. I touched my cheek and was startled to see that I was crying.
Was I happy? Or sad? I had no idea. Emotions I had never felt, never let myself feel, tumbled around in my chest, swirling like water down the drain. They spun around so that the water became muddy and unclear and I had no idea what I was feeling anymore.
All I felt was ache. Hurt. A hole opened up inside of me that I wasn't aware of until a second ago.
Now it gaped open like a chasm
I leaned against Brad and cried.
He held me against him, quiet as anything, the only sound the muted shushing of the cars snaking by and his own slowing heartbeat.
What the hell was this? Sex was supposed to be fun. Sex with Brad was supposed to be my frivolous escape.
I pulled back from his chest and sniffled. My tears had soaked through his t-shirt, making it translucent. My cheeks burned.
"Hey." Brad bent down, pressing his forehead against mine. "You want to talk about it?"
I tried to gather up the shards of my dignity. "We don't talk, Brad."
He blinked. "We can."
"You weren't supposed to be here tonight," I heard myself saying. It sounded like an accusation.
"But I was." He wiped away the tear that hung at the edge of my nose. "And I've missed you."
"You said that," I sniffled. "A few times."
He waited a beat. "Did you miss me?"
His image swam in front of me, I blinked and the tears fell even harder.
And all at once, I just... gave up.
A dam burst in my chest and the muddy, swirling water poured out in a flood, and I suddenly felt everything at once.
He was supposed to leave. He was supposed to be an unreliable, undependable man, someone I could use and discard before he discarded me. He wasn't supposed to be here, making me feel things and holding me quietly while I did.
He wasn't supposed to be placing tender kisses along my hairline with an intimacy that made me shudder. He wasn't supposed to be so tender right now. He wasn't supposed to be smoothing my hair and murmuring soothing words. He wasn't supposed to comfort me, dammit, I was a grown-ass woman and I didn't need him to do this for me. I could take care of myself. I didn't need him to take care of me.
He was supposed to leave.
I put my hands on his chest, wanting like hell to push him away but I only grabbed his shirt and clung to him because he had stayed, even though I had tried so hard to drive him away. He hadn't left and he was here, here, here....
"I'm going to take you home," he whispered against my cheek.
I nodded and let him slip his hand around my waist, holding me upright, and I leaned against him.
He was really strong.
Strong enough to carry us both.
"Keys?" He held out his hand and I mutely fished around in my purse and handed them over. No one had ever driven my car before, but I just held them out and plopped my keys into his outstretched palm. Then I sagged into the passenger seat and let Brad drive me home.
"Your car?" I asked.
"Don't worry about it."
"Did you drive here?"
"I said," he turned to me, and his face was stern, "don't worry about it." But then he closed my fingers in his hand and lifted them to his mouth, kissing me so tenderly that he almost made me cry again.
He pulled into the underground garage below my building and found a spot within minutes, a feat I wouldn't have believed possible before this evening.
Now? I sort of believed anything was possible.
He parked the car quietly, walked around to the passenger side quietly, and then quietly opened the door and leaned in.
"I'm going to carry you inside now," he informed me.
"You don't have to do that."
"I know. But I'm going to anyway."
When a fire burns savagely hot, there is a certain shade of blue that dances in the flames. His eyes were that exact same color.
"I'm not done with you yet," he said.
A shiver went down my spine, freezing me in place, and I let him pick me up. I let him carry me - something he did with surprising ease - cradling me in his arms like a baby. And not once did I think that this was crazy. Not once did I worry about whether I had the upper hand, whether I was the one in charge here.
I knew that I wasn't.
And that was profoundly, deeply, okay.
"Brad," I whispered, as he laid me out on my bed.
/> "Shush," he replied. My breath quickened as he lifted my skirt. "It was too fast in the alley," he murmured, his warm breath across my thigh. I felt completely hollowed out, but desire surged in to fill that empty space. I fell back, as boneless and yielding as a ragdoll and let Brad take control.
He paused for a moment and lifted his head to look me in the eye. He felt it. Me yielding to him. He had never felt it before and his face broke out into such a perfect, beautiful smile that I almost started crying again.
Then he pressed the flat of his tongue against my slit and began to lick.
Heat spilled into that empty, hollow, space in my chest and began to fill it. The warmth radiated out from my chest, spreading down my limbs until I swear I could shoot lightning out from my fingertips. With each tiny, perfect jab of Brad's tongue, my body pulsed. I was a liquid, spilling over the sheets, ready to dissolve into him. He brought me right to the edge of sanity...
And then pulled back.
"Tell me," he growled.
I sat up, bewildered and more than a little irritated. "What?"
"Tell me," he paused and stammered a second like his brain was moving faster than his tongue. Though his tongue could move pretty damn fast. "Tell me what you're feeling."
"Can't you tell?"
"Yes. But, can you?"
I blinked at him, arching up. "Brad, stop fucking around with me." I wanted to beg him for the release he'd denied me. Make me come, Brad. Please.
"I'm not. I'm not fucking around at all. And I want to make sure, before I go any further, that you're not fucking around anymore either." He looked me square in the eye. "I'm done with your games, Olivia. We do this, we're doing it right."
"With me as your girlfriend?" I teased.
He didn't smile at all. "Exactly that, yes."
But I couldn't help scoffing. "And you'll be my big boyfriend?"
"I'd actually like that, yeah."
"But..." In spite of everything that had just happened, in spite of the undammed emotions that were now coursing through me, completely unchecked, in spite of all of the feelings I had and how I knew they were all for him... in spite of all of that, I was still trying to twist this - whatever it was - into the shape that already existed in my head. "You're a fucking hockey star," I explained patiently, like this was just something he hadn't considered up until now. "You're on the road, with all the fans, all those puck bunnies flinging themselves at you. You really want to be tied down?"
His eyes gleamed for a second. "Yes."
"And you want to tie me down?" I swallowed.
"Actually?" That blue fire in his eyes burned hotter. "That sounds like a hell of a lot of fun."
He disappeared from the room.
"Wait," I called, "What the hell?" I paused, waited. My skirt was coiled up around my waist and the cool air hit the heat between my legs and made me shiver. I felt suddenly bereft and alone. And I wanted him to come back.
After a moment, he did. And in his hand was a length of...
"Is that...rope?"
"It is."
"Where the hell did you find rope in my apartment?"
He shrugged. "You had it in the closet in your front hall."
"How did you know this?"
"I left it there."
"What?"
He shrugged again, but the tiniest smirk quirked the side of his mouth.
"Wait, what do you want to do with that?"
He walked over to the edge of the bed and let a few feet dangle down from his outstretched hand. It was surprisingly silky against the bare skin of my thigh and raised a trail of goosebumps in its wake.
"How long have you been thinking about this?" I gasped.
"A long time. But I needed to wait until you were ready."
I bit my lip, heart already racing before I even realized what he was going to do.
Because I knew that I was going to let him.
"You're ready," he growled, moving over me. "So now I'm gonna tie you down."
Chapter 18
Brad
Her eyes widened. For a moment, I thought she might hit me. Anger flickered across her face, as did laughter, then disbelief.
She was wide open to me right now. Her last wall had fallen down and she was letting me see everything. And it was so fucking beautiful that I needed more, and I knew, on instinct, that I would have to push her to get it. Nudge her over past the last boundary she had erected between us. And that meant taking complete control.
I leaned over her and took her bottom lip between my teeth. I bit down, making her gasp and then hiss, before I took it between my lips and sucked greedily. She moaned into my mouth and in that moan, I heard it.
Surrender.
"You ready?"
She nodded once, her eyes closed.
"I'm taking off your clothes now."
She nodded again.
I lifted her shirt over her head, nearly tearing it in my eagerness but trying to go slowly. She was trusting me, for maybe the first time ever, and I would be damned if I took that lightly. So I tamped my desire down and took my time, lavishing her now naked breasts with attention, kissing and suckling them until her dark nipples were tight and erect.
"Unh, you're going to leave a mark," Olivia groaned.
"Sorry."
"Don't be." She twisted from side to side, her eyes shut tightly. "Mark me, Brad. Make me feel it."
"You will," I promised, leaning over and kissing her full mouth. She parted her lips, letting me in eagerly.
Then I sucked in my breath and got to work.
She opened her eyes and watched me, and her eyes shone so brightly that I could see myself in the reflection as I snaked the rope around the headboard and trailed it down in equal lengths along her body. I could see the concentration on my face as I tied her, not so tight that it would hurt her, but tight enough that she would feel it.
"Do you like this?" she wondered.
I leaned back and looked at her. The rope bound her wrists to the headboard, then twisted down in a crisscrossing pattern that put her breasts on display. I had finished with a complicated knot, centered right over her breastbone.
"Yes," I breathed, letting my eyes rake over the sight of her. "Yes. I really fucking like this."
Her lips parted and her breathing came faster. She was nearly panting now and I hadn't even begun to touch her. "You like it too," I said, smiling. "You really do."
She licked her lips. She still didn't want to admit to me how much she wanted to give in.
I wasn't worried. That would come next.
"You look, amazing," I declared. I wanted her to hear it, how beautiful she was, how much she fucking meant to me. But, also, this was Olivia I had naked and tied up underneath me. I couldn't resist a little bit of dirty talk too. "You look good enough to eat."
Her eyes flashed and a little bit of the nervousness in them drained away. "You gonna eat me, Brad?"
"No. I'm going to devour you."
Chapter 19
Olivia
Just before his tongue touched me, he groaned. It was a small noise and I could tell I wasn't supposed to hear it. And it nearly shattered me.
Then his tongue found my center and I lost all capability of thinking.
His mouth was searingly hot on my skin. He didn't nibble or tease. He grabbed ahold of the knot at the center of my breastbone and pulled me to him, using the leverage he gained to thrust his tongue deep into the secret spaces inside of me. I wiggled against him, feeling the way the rope slid against my skin and I knew it was going to mark me, probably everywhere, but I didn't fucking care because it was marking me as his.
I was his and I wasn't going anywhere.
And neither was he.
My skin felt electric, my body blazing hot with the fire he'd ignited. Brad was always good at oral, precise and diligent, but right now he was losing it and that made it so much more real than anything we had done before. I heard his grunts and sighs down there and I knew he was loving this as
much as I was, maybe even more.
And though I had always known him to be a good lover, this was the first time I had considered that the word 'lover' meant someone who loves.
That thought broke open above me and suddenly it was all I could do to keep myself from crying again.
I wriggled, pinned and somehow the fact that I couldn't maneuver myself to meet him, that my pleasure was all in his hands made it break over me all the sooner. All at once I cried out because I was cumming so hard that it blinded me, and I swore that my eyes were open but there were only white flashes in my vision.
And then, so fast, so fast that I hadn't even stopped crying out, he slipped inside of me and I hit that peak yet again. I squirmed and bucked, riding the frenzy. It was good, so good, that I was tied down because it was the only thing keeping me from flying away.
"Holy shit," Brad breathed, looking down at where we were connected. "Jesus Olivia, look at you."
But I looked at him instead, this man I thought I had figured out, and I was so, so glad I had gotten him all wrong.
*****
"Leave it," I sighed sleepily. "I want you to keep me like this."
I barely knew what I was saying anymore. All I could think was that if he untied me, I might fall apart. This rope was the only thing keeping me together.
But Brad's eyes narrowed. "Liv, it's going to hurt you. You can't sleep with your arms up like that."
"Can I at least try?" I pleaded.
He chuckled. "You liked it that much, huh?"
"Yeah," I said softly. "I did."
"Then we'll do it again," Brad said, just as matter-of-fact as can be, like he didn't just blow my mind by casually mentioning a next time.
"Here," he whispered. "This might hurt a little."
The rope had cut deep dents into my skin and they stung more than I was prepared for. I hissed at the burn.
Brad leaned over and kissed the mark.
I exhaled sharply as he did it again. Laying a feathery trail up my torso, he soothed the burn, alternating kisses with little laps of his tongue then blowing a cooling breath over my skin. "If you keep doing that, I might cum again," I groaned, "I'm warning you."
