Move on. I guess some people don't know how to do that. No matter how much moving on we tried, something just wasn't right. I knew something was going on. I knew someone had her eye. Late nights at the office. Erased texts, secret phone calls, and she always seemed on guard.
Did I do it? Did I do something to make her not want me anymore?
Fuck it.
Fuck the thinking.
I will never understand what went on in her mind to give up all we had together. What we shared. What we still share. She will always be a part of life whether I like it or not. I just hope I can stand to be cordial with her. John on the other hand, well, he's a whole different story. Almost thirty years of knowing each other, and he just fucks me over like that? Best friend, my ass. No best friend does shit like that. Of all the fucked up pussy in the world, he chose my wife to heal. What the fuck?
And Carolyn - how could she? I just don't understand. I gave her my heart and soul. I gave her everything. I made her my everything. I wanted no one else. Just her. It was always just her. High school sweethearts. Does that ever work out? I think it’s rare. No one ever ends up staying together for that long, and those that do are the lucky ones. Life challenges you so much. We were. We were challenged, over and over again. Every time we were stronger together, until we weren't anymore. I don't know when it changed. Maybe when I made Captain? The nights and days seemed longer, and I was so tired. So tired of the yelling when I got home. So tired of the disappointment in her eyes. So tired of trying to make things up to her and it never being good enough.
I guess John was there when I wasn't. He said the things that I couldn't. And gave her the things I wouldn't. He was the man I could no longer be for her. He was her one, and I was the asshole that let it all happen. I was blinded. Well, I say that, but I'm sure it’s not fully the truth. I'm sure I could have done more, said more, and tried more. There could have just been so much more. But I gave up and so did she. We lost what we had.
Ugh, listen to yourself. Stop thinking about them. Stop wasting your moments on figuring them out.
I tried to make my mind forget. The pain she caused I wish to never feel again. I only wish to feel pleasure with Phoenix. I only wish to give pleasure with Phoenix. But, I also question the feelings I feel for her. She's irresistible to me. Not just sexually. No. There's so much more to her than just that. I just have to find it.
I have to give her the trust and freedom to give in to me in all ways.
I only hope I can do the same for her.
I hope I can change her. Jacobs started that. I wish to finish. I wish to learn all I can about her. To treat her better than any other man could. To take what I learned with Carolyn and hope to never repeat it with her. To show her relationships can be worth it to try. That it doesn't always just have to be hook ups and hang ups. That it can be something more. Something worthy, with someone worthy...me.
Twenty minutes. It seems like the longest fucking twenty minutes of my life.
Hm, the thoughts of what I will do to her. I have to keep the first time as something she wants to come back to. Play it right, Jaxson. Don't give her everything just yet. Hold back a bit. Make her want more. Make her beg for more. Make her ache for you in every way possible, just like you have ached for her for three years.
You have watched her with the men of your unit. All giving her just enough to mark her off as another notch. Not one has given her something to come back to. Well Blaine of course. But that was something else. He opened up the gates for me. He allowed her to trust in someone. To break her rules. To break the hold the rules had on her. To allow for her to jump at the chance of something.
Now, prove to her you have something for her to jump at.
Prove to her, you have something she wants.
Something she needs.
You are hers. And she is yours.
Prove it.
Chapter Ten
-Phoenix-
Knock, knock, knock. I awaited the Captain’s approval of my entrance. All the while, my heart rate danced as the arousal and anxiety of this moment fought within my mind and body.
“Come in," he paused, "and lock the door,” his mumbled voice said from the other side of the door.
I did just that, unaware of his naked body exposed for me to view. An early tease of what I would have to wait for. The smell of his cologne lingered within the walls. I breathed in it deep. It was intoxicating to me; just like he was.
As I turned and noticed what was in front of me, I took it all in. His chest was chiseled, with a six pack to accompany its perfect physique. Damn, all this time, and that’s what’s been hiding behind his uniform.
His cock was covered by the wooden desk in front of him, but I crept slowly towards him hoping for a glance.
“Come," he gestured. His voice was raspy.
I walked to him. His cock was hard and ready to fuck.
“Do you like what you see?”
I nodded.
“This is all yours. But first, you’re mine.” He lifted my body atop of the desk before him. Without hesitation, he stripped my shorts quickly. Next was the tank top covering my breasts which he couldn’t wait to suck. My body expanded as my breathing escalated. He had me hot and bothered already.
A light kiss up my thigh was all I needed to shiver from his touch. His mouth inched closer and closer and found their way between my legs. The material of my panties rubbed his cheek as he slipped his tongue behind it and lightly licked my clit. The heat from his tongue, mixed with his soft touch, sent me into overload. He’s barely touched me and he already had me feeling crazy. I wanted him to plunge his face between my legs and take advantage of the pussy before him.
It took everything in me not to grab his hair and push him with force to eat me out. I was afraid my punishment from it would be for him to pull away and after the other day, I couldn’t go another night without knowing what it felt like to fuck him. Plus, I really wished for some more material to discuss and droll over with Roxy while she was here.
“Now, let’s strip you naked. I want our bodies to share the comfort of being free.”
His hands were warm as they unclasped my bra. The material straddled my breasts momentarily as he kissed my shoulders, then moved to my neck. His touch was soft yet dominant. It was as if he was marking his territory with every touch.
As he removed my bra from my breasts he stared at me, bare for him to view. I was fully exposed for him to take in. “Now there’s the body I envision fucking. Are you ready for it?”
“Yes,” I pleaded. I've never experienced a man providing the sexual power. I was always the alpha in the relationship. It was nice to give in to another’s pleasures for once. It felt empowering to give up the power, if you could understand that.
He knelt to his knees, as he grabbed my hips and pushed his tongue deep within my pussy lips. The feeling I dreamt about was now a reality I was ready to be apart of.
The swirls of his tongue drove me wild. His face against me, I squirmed at his touch. I couldn't help it. The thought of fucking him finally had me in a rare sexual mode. I wanted to pounce on him. I grasped his hair as I pulled him to my clit. He sucked it with pressure. I squirmed more upon his desk, which felt cold beneath my naked body.
My head arched towards the comfort of the furniture's surface below me as his slight touch of his tongue left me hot. My clit burned as he licked me up and down.
His hands moved to my breasts, all the while his tongue, never stopped paying attention to my pussy that ached for him. Literally, I ached.
He rubbed my clit as he devoured me. Fast swirls pinned my body back.
"Oh," I screamed aloud. I felt clammy. Mhm, my whole body heated up from the pleasure he was providing.
Oh God, that tongue.
My call left him to look up at me as he swallowed my clit within his mouth once more. He smirked and winked as he sucked harder. He pulled his lips from my clit and grabbed my chin. He reeled me in close to his body, hi
s erected cock pressed against my leg. Our lips finally touched.
I had fantasied about what they would be like pressed together.
Electric.
That's the only way I could describe it. It was electric.
He kissed me with a fire behind his lips. Damn. Those lips. I wanted them all over me. I wanted him to kiss me and never stop. I wanted more. I wanted to give him more.
The tip of his cock touched my midriff as he kissed my neck hard and fast. The light feeling of lubrication from the head traced a small line upon my stomach. I had him just as wild as he had me.
"I want you in me." I begged. I hoped he would listen to my plea. My pussy was so wet. I needed to feel him slide within me.
"Are you ready for me?"
I was. I was ready for everything he was ready to give me.
Chapter Eleven
-Captain Michaels-
Have you ever longed for something so much before, and then, that moment - that special moment - when you finally got to indulged in what you wanted for so long, what you fantasized about, was perfect? That was her. She was perfect. Her pussy, her lips, her tongue, the smell of her body. Everything. Perfect.
We were electric together. Everything clicked perfectly. It was as if we both knew what the other wanted. What the other longed for.
Her pussy felt amazing between my lips. I breathed in deep her scent upon my upper lip. I was ready to put my cock within her, and she was finally ready for me.
I had her begging.
I have what I want before me.
My cock yearned for the touch of her warm, wet pussy around it.
Slowly, I pulled from her body and pulled my drawer open next to us. I ripped open the wrapper of a condom I stored in there for this moment and spit the excess on the ground below me. I grabbed my erection with my hand while I flexed it slowly back and forth upon her clit. I pushed her body lightly back against the desk for her back to hit the coldness of the wood below her. I teased her pussy just a bit more before I allowed her to feel the penetration of what I've wanted for so long to be inside of her. Soft moans and squirms showed me how much I affected her. She affected me too.
Her head arched back as the foreplay between the two of us built up to what we both wanted.
One last external stroke, and her pussy willingly welcomed me within.
Instantaneously, we both reacted from the feeling. Moans escaped both our mouths and I pushed my cock deep with her.
Fast thrusts.
I've wanted this for so long. My cock couldn't hold back what it wanted anymore.
With each thrust her body flexed back and forth upon the desk before me. It felt cold against my warm body which needed her.
Her legs spread in the air, I grabbed her thighs to pull her close to me. Faster and faster. Her mouth was open, moans escaped within the silence of the office. Her face and chest were red as I fucked her. The feel of her thighs were smooth. Oh, so smooth. She was soft and silky. I wanted to lick every inch of her smooth skin.
No more kissing. I couldn't. Not just yet. I needed her to get to that level with me first. I will have her reach that element. Until then, I only wanted to fuck her brains out. I wanted the sound of my balls smacking against her ass as I pounded her pussy and the moans that escaped her mouth be apart of her memory.
My desk flexed back and forth, as if it was going to break from the rapidness of my pounding.
I needed to switch positions. I wanted her to know who was in control of that pussy of hers. Swiftly I grabbed her waist and pulled her towards me and off the desk. I pushed her lightly for her to face the opposite direction and licked my lips as I played with her pussy once more. I pushed my cock within her again. A loud moan escaped both our mouths from the feeling. I grasped her neck lightly, as I pulled her close to me once again. The sound of our fucking was music to my ears.
The feel of her hips within my hands was powerful to me. I had the power.
I had her.
I needed her and I finally got her.
"You like that my little firecracker? You like when I take control of your pussy like that?"
"Yes," she moaned for me.
I had her where I wanted her. She let go of her walls for me.
For me.
Only me.
Deep thrusts my cock pushed faster and further within her wet self. She welcomed me each time as she begged for more. Her pants echoed within my ears. Her body clenched me close. I pulled her in as I grabbed her breasts, so plump, so perfect.
With each feel of my penetrated cock within her, her pussy tightened for me. She was close. I was ready to make Phoenix Williams cum for me - for me.
I grabbed her hips and thrusted. More and more. I didn't want to stop and I knew she didn't want me to either. My ass tightened with each pump.
"You like that baby?"
Soft moans escaped her sweet lips in response. Her head leaned forward as her pussy clenched me within her.
Just a minute or so more and she would climax. Oh, I'm almost there too.
"Mhm, you feel so good. Cum with me Phoenix," I whispered within her ear.
Not a minute later, did I feel her pussy walls collapse before me. Her body shook as she hollared out a loud moan. My cock felt the friction and tension and I released. One loud moan on my end, and we both hit our max together. As our bodies bent with one another in climax, I smirked knowing how much affect I just had on.
"You like that?" I asked as I pulled myself from within her.
Her body still laid still before me as she took her time to compose herself.
"Wow," was the only word that escaped the beautiful, rosy lips of hers.
Knock, knock, knock.
"Captain? Are you in there? It's Holly, I have a message from the Mayor. It's urgent."
"Shit, shit, shit!" I whispered.
We both scrambled quickly to gather our clothing and re-dress ourselves to look as if nothing happened. It would be hard to completely mask our pleasure however; both our cheeks were rosy and our breathing still escalated.
"Give me a minute. Just finishing talking with Miss Williams. I'll be right out." I hollered, and hoped my words were convincing to her naive ears.
"Yes, sir."
"Holy shit, that was close," Phoenix huffed while she tried to quickly cloth her half naked body.
"Yes it was. So, was I worth it?" I stopped and looked to her. I really questioned her answer. I hoped it would be what my ears wished to hear.
"Yes, every minute of it," she smirked looking up, one pant leg up her thigh.
"Good," I smiled back.
I did it.
She will be mine. Now, it's only a matter of time.
Chapter Twelve
-Phoenix-
What the fuck just happened?
Thoughts piled my mind. I tried to gather my composure as I left the department and walked to my car. Images of the Captain flooded my memory as I tried to think of anything else in those moments after, but I couldn't. I didn't want to. I wanted to think of only him.
I hated doggie style, yet for some reason with him, it was amazing. It was perfect. It was what I needed and could have never imagined - not with him at least.
What has he done with me? I thought Blaine had me wrapped up. This is worse. This is something more, much more.
I had to keep my composure. Roxy would be here sometime soon and I had enough dirt to spill with her to keep a night of conversation between the two of us entertaining.
“Phoenix,” I heard my named called out.
I looked to see who was asking for me.
“Hey, wait up,” he called again.
Captain Michael’s stood outside my window. I rolled it down as his bright eyes stared back at me.
“Here,” he handed me a scrap paper. “This is my number. I know you have the next few days off, but I wish to hear from you. I hope you feel the same about me,” he winked. He was easy to read in that moment. He wanted me. All of me. Once again I h
eld the power.
“Ok,” I grabbed the paper and shoved it in my purse. “I’ll see what I can do,” I smirked. “I may have some free time for a text or something,” I laughed back.
“How about a photo?” his eyes lit up as he asked.
I giggled at his request. “Maybe if you’re lucky. Bye, Captain Michaels,” I waved.
I pulled away, and watched in the rear view as his eyes followed my movement off the property. Could I have him hooked already? Does he just want to play or do I have a whole different reign over him?
My mind was bombarded with different thoughts of what could be going on. I was confused, and intrigued all at the same time. I questioned the morality of our actions and then praised the awkwardness of our relationship all at the same time. He had me spell bound, and the feeling was definitely mutual. What was I going to do with this situation?
Questions intrigued my mind while I drove, until my phone rang. The ring tone was bubbly and energetic just like its caller; Roxy.
“Roxy! Hey girl,” I picked up quickly. She never informed me of her flight details, so I awaited her call desperately. I couldn’t wait for her arrival.
“Nixxx! Hey girl, heyy!”
“Hey, you never called me back with details. When you coming in?”
“Coming in? Girl, I’m calling to tell you I’m here!” she screamed from the other end.
“What? You’re here? When the hell did you get here? Wait, when the hell did you leave?”
Punishment (Light My Fire Series Book #2) Page 4
