Looking at her face, his steely gaze going from her mouth to her eyes, she thought he’d brush her off the way he had done before.
But he did the unexpected and said, “The reason I quit the CPD is my last case was the murder of a child.”
She felt her mouth drop open. “Oh, Brycen...”
“This murder was brutal, the child about Junior’s age. I just couldn’t do it anymore.” His head lowered and turned aside with what must be a wave of sorrow. When he lifted his head and met her eyes again, she saw the depth of his anguish. “I’ve never told anyone this.”
She put her palm on his cheek, wondering how he could be so profoundly affected by the death of a child he never knew. The murder of a child was horrific, but surely that one hadn’t been his first.
“Did something like that happen in Alaska, too?” she asked.
He put his hand over hers, burdens of the past haunting him.
“You don’t have to tell me.”
“The accident did play a role. Kayla and I were returning from getting married when it happened.”
He dropped another bomb with that statement.
“You married her?” She moved so he stood directly in front of her, resting her hands on his chest.
He put both hands on the counter on each side of her. “She understood how I felt. She agreed to separate if we grew apart.”
Did he feel guilty about that?
“She must have hoped you never would.” She needed to keep calm, to keep from responding to his nearness and the closeness that came from his revelations.
“We had a good relationship.”
Only because she’d gone along with his philosophy on marriage. Did he realize that?
“She must have loved you,” she said.
“I loved her.”
In his own way, but Drury suspected he hadn’t loved her as much as he could love a woman. If he had, he would see how wrong he was about marriage and what it could mean to a man and a woman. It made her reflect on her own marriage with Noah. She had loved him, but could she love another man more?
“Why didn’t you tell anyone?” she asked.
He straightened from the counter, giving her more space. She took a deeper breath.
“Her family was already devastated. Hell, I was devastated. And given that her father didn’t want her to be with me, I didn’t see any point.”
Drury didn’t know what she’d have done. She could agree, what would be the point in telling Kayla’s family that she’d married Brycen that day? She died.
The tragedy tugged at Drury. No wonder he’d left Alaska. And no wonder he’d started his show. He’d left painful memories, and the murder of a child explained so much.
“The accident wasn’t your fault,” she said.
“My line of work led to it,” he admitted with brutal honesty.
Drury didn’t agree. “So you think you shouldn’t have gone into homicide?”
His look stayed locked with hers, but his harsh self-criticism softened and his eyes passed down over her mouth and back into her eyes. “No.”
He sounded as though he hadn’t thought of it that way before, that he hadn’t been wrong to choose to fight crime. Everything that led him to become a detective rang true. He stood on the right side of the law and shouldn’t allow choices criminals made to doubt his integrity.
“It doesn’t mean you should move back to Alaska, although you should face what happened.”
“That’s a little impossible when Kayla’s family is so against me. I did harbor some hope they’d moved on, but I can see that was useless.”
“They’re against you for the wrong reason. And personally I think they need to face what happened even more than you. Your leaving only enabled them to keep blaming you.”
He put on a wry grin, a sure sign he’d rather not talk about this anymore. “Yeah, but if I hadn’t left I wouldn’t have my show.”
She smiled back, unable to resist. “With all that charm, the show would have found you anyway.”
A low, deep and slow, sexy chuckle touched her most intimate senses. She felt the release of tension in him.
“You’re not just smart, Drury. You see things in their natural light. You make everything seem so simple. Maybe it has been...all this time.”
“Yeah...” She sank into his incredible eyes, and his mouth as he spoke. “Maybe.”
Moving closer, he slid his hand into her hair at the base of her neck, bringing his mouth a breath from hers. “Why was it so easy to tell you that? I feel like weight has been lifted off me.”
“Maybe it came naturally.” She didn’t think he’d come full circle in dealing with the way Kayla had died, but he’d just crossed a critical milestone on his path to letting go.
“Yes... Naturally.” He pressed his lips to hers.
“Oh,” she breathed against him, the sensation sweeping her away. She kissed him back.
Just when they both were about to lose control, he stepped back. “The fire.”
Looking there, she saw the flames had dwindled and only the embers glowed red. Of course, they had to stay warm.
She put her hand over her still-tingling lips as he went to stoke the fire.
“If you have to go to the bathroom, I’ll take you to the outhouse,” he said as though needing to redirect urges. “It’s behind the shed.”
More than gunmen could lurk out there. Wildlife posed a danger, too, except not in this storm. If she had to go, she’d hold it until morning.
“Yeah. Sure.” She went back into the living room and moved the coffee table out of the way so she could make the bed.
Brycen finished with the fire and reached for the sofa handle, pulling out the mattress before she did. She went to the trunk and retrieved the pillows, and he lifted out more blankets. There were sheets at the bottom, as well. Drury started with those.
Brycen stood on the other side of the mattress and tucked in the first sheet. Drury kept looking up at him, watching his manly hands smooth out the top sheet. He looked up at her and the connection zinged. Try as she might to minimize the symbolism of the bed between them, it loomed with the night.
She tossed the pillows at the head while he shook out a blanket over the mattress. She helped him straighten that and two more, all the while unable to calm her warm awareness of him. They finished with the bed, now a cozy nest ready for the night.
He stood across from her. Neither moved. She felt awkward and he must, too.
Picking up her book, she removed her boots and climbed into the bed, making a valiant attempt to read.
He went to the fire and poked the burning wood, even though it didn’t need stoking. He put another log on, bringing the fire to a rumble. When he could no longer use the fire as a distraction, he went to the bookshelf. Finding something, he sat on the recliner.
Outside, the wind whipped in a gust, almost shaking the cabin. But they were warm and safe and dry in this blessing of a cabin. In Brycen’s note to the owners, she really would have to add a thank-you. They might not have made it to the village in this storm, which had arrived much sooner than forecasted.
The gust died and a steady wind persisted. She heard snow hitting the windows. Drury managed to read a little, and that made her tired enough to drift off to sleep.
When she next woke, darkness engulfed the cabin. The fire had dwindled to glowing embers. Brycen must have put her book on the side table for her.
Turning her head, she saw him lying beside her. The covers came to his chest, his muscle-sculpted arms on top. His face angled toward her, lashes fanned under his eyes, chiseled cheeks sloping to jawline, lips resting closed and beckoning her for another kiss.
She told herself the chill made her snuggle deeper into the covers and move closer to him.
His eyes opened a sliver and without hesitation, his arm opened for her. She didn’t analyze why she positioned herself against him and put her head on his shoulder. The wind had eased. In fact, she didn’t hear any
blowing or snow hitting the windows.
“Are you warm enough?” he asked in a sleepy, deep voice.
“I am now.” She lifted her head and met his equally sleepy eyes.
They stayed that way awhile, in the quiet, warmed by the chemistry they generated. Then Brycen lifted his hand and brushed her cheek. She closed her eyes briefly, overwhelmed with sensation and incredulous she could feel so much with just a touch. He moved and kissed her, softly, lightly. And then with growing ardor.
She slid her fingers into his thick black hair. This kiss could go on forever. She melted into the movement of his lips, meeting his leashed passion, savoring the promise of what would come. He didn’t rush. Like fine wine, he sipped, tasted and enjoyed each second.
Gliding her hand down from his hair, she reveled in the muscular contours of his shoulder and chest, resting there as he took the kiss to the next level, deeper, more urgent. He’d removed his shirt before coming to bed last night. He rolled farther onto his side and she lay on her back. Rising up a bit, lingering over her mouth, he looked into her eyes while they caught their breath amidst the wonder of such a light, loving sensation.
Then slowly he touched her mouth again. Airy tingles spread with just that. She had never felt so connected to anyone, not intimately. So intangible, so incredible, she flew away, out of her body and into a realm of aweinspiring buoyancy.
Again he took her gradually to the edge of control before ending the kiss. Reaching for the hem of her maroon, body-hugging cotton, polyester and spandex top, he pulled it up and over her head. She raised her arms and he tossed the garment aside. Pausing to admire her black bra embellished with lace, he got up onto his knees and unbuttoned his jeans.
“You do all the work,” she said. “I’ll watch.”
He grinned his approval and pushed down his jeans, sitting to slide them the rest of the way off.
The chill in the cabin didn’t bother her with the racing beat of her heart and the excitement of anticipation as he pulled the covers off her and unbuttoned her jeans. He knelt between her legs and looked up at her as he unzipped the jeans, his face close. He revealed her matching black lace cheeky panties and paused again.
“You’re full of surprises,” he murmured.
“Why? Because I wear sexy underwear?”
“Did you wear them for me?” His hot, light gray eyes lasered her.
She did on occasion wear sexy underwear, sometimes just for the heck of it, because it made her feel good. But lately she’d been wearing them every day. “Yes.”
He pulled her jeans down. Drury lifted her butt to accommodate him. He left her panties in place. Tossing the jeans aside, he removed her thermal socks to reveal her dark pink toenail polish.
“I didn’t think you were into such girly things,” he said, kissing the top of her foot and moving up her leg.
“I look like a boy?”
He chuckled low and deep as he kissed his way up her calf. “No. You’re a hot, sexy woman. I just didn’t think you painted your toenails and wore lingerie.” He stopped to look up at her. “I’m glad you do.”
She smiled as he resumed kissing his way up her leg.
“What surprises do you have for me?” she asked. He still had on his underwear.
“You’re going to have to wait and see.” He kissed her inner thigh and toyed with the hem of the panties. Moving up more, he kissed the lacy material, warm breath penetrating.
“As much as I like these, they have to go.” He slid the panties down, kissing her flesh before taking them off and dropping them onto the jeans.
He came down on his hands, looking at her. She shaved her hair there, leaving only a thin, close-cropped strip.
“Nice and tidy,” he said.
“It’s your turn.” She pointed with her index finger and gave it a playful twirl. “Off with them.” Never had intimacy been so easy. Natural. Playful as much as intense with passion.
He removed his underwear and now she had her chance to admire him. Clean-shaven and ache-worthy.
“All the ladies must love you,” she said.
Without returning her humor, he lowered himself down and kissed her. “You’re the only lady I want right now.”
Right now.
She wouldn’t let the thought take root. Right now was enough for her.
He unfastened her bra and it went the way of the other pieces. As he kissed her again and his hands ran over her breasts, she forgot any reason why she shouldn’t allow this. How could she stop something so beautiful? Brycen had to feel it, too.
She gave in to yearning and felt his statuesque body from his shoulders to the tops of his thighs. She reveled in his weight on her and the first penetration. He moved slowly, touching her body as she touched his, looking into her eyes. Each treasured moment passed with care, not a second wasted. She felt, as he must, too, every sensation to its fullest.
When she could restrain no more, he finally took up a smooth rhythm, building force as sensation mounted, burning to the inevitable eruption.
It took Drury several seconds to float back down to the bed, the cabin, Brycen on top of her breathing beside her head. The real world.
The sound of a helicopter spared them any reflection, any thought on consequences.
Brycen climbed off the bed and dressed.
“How did he find us?” Drury asked, dressing on the other side of the bed.
He went to find his radio, digging it out of his jacket pocket. As he disconnected the wire, the sound of the pilot’s voice filled the cabin.
“Cage. You there? Over.”
“This is Cage. We’re in the cabin.”
“It’s about time you answered my damn calls. I’ve been looking for you for two hours now.”
He looked at Drury. “Sorry. I meant to radio you earlier.”
Luckily the pilot couldn’t see them or know what had transpired over the last two hours.
“There’s enough room for me to land.”
“Give us a few minutes.”
“Roger that.”
They’d dispensed of the formality of saying “Over.”
He helped Drury fold the blankets and left the sheets in a pile on the floor so the owners would know they’d been used. Brycen folded the mattress back in the sofa and replaced the cushions. When Drury had the living room tidied, and books back on the shelf, she met Brycen in the kitchen, where he’d put away the pan and tied a trash bag and put it by the door. He took out a business card and used a pen from a kitchen drawer. After he wrote an explanation on how to get reimbursed for the window, Drury wrote a thank-you note.
Leaving the card on the table, she left the cabin ahead of Brycen, who carried the trash bag to the waiting helicopter. Once inside, Drury found she couldn’t meet his eyes. What had just transpired between them? She no longer felt a connection to Noah. And she didn’t feel safe with the feelings she had for Brycen.
Chapter 10
Back in Anchorage, Brycen drove Drury to pick up Junior. Sitting across from her on the long flight back had twisted him into knots. Last night had felt so great. He clicked with her so...mmm. No words could convey the passion in his mind. Looking at her, with her hair draped down over her breasts, long thighs in jeans and those stunning blue eyes looking at him with such intimacy, made his head swim. At first he’d responded in kind. How could he not? It had taken a while for the fantasy to wear off. But it had.
Then he’d started picturing the future.
He pulled to a stop in front of her parents’ house. “I think we should leave Junior here.”
She turned a surprised look toward him, her hand on the door handle. “No. He won’t like that. Besides, he isn’t any safer here than with us. If the people after us want to go after my family, too, they’ll find my parents and Junior.”
He couldn’t argue with her. And maybe he’d feel better taking on the responsibility of protecting them both. The three of them together just gave him a case of dread. A bad feeling in the pit of
his stomach. Making love with Drury had changed the dynamics for him. He could actually see himself hooking up with her. Practically that made no sense. What about his life in Chicago? Did he really want to leave that behind? Did he want to move back to Alaska? Drury had already said she wouldn’t leave. Her home was in Alaska. Both of Junior’s grandparents were there.
He didn’t want to move back to Alaska. Even if he did, he wouldn’t torment Kayla’s family any more than he had to.
Pulling up to Drury’s parents’ house, he followed her to the door.
Drury knocked and opened the door. “Weird. They usually see me drive up.”
Brycen heard Drury’s mother say, “Your mother is here, Junior. Let go of me!”
“Oh.” Drury rushed through the Victorian-style house, furnished with collectibles that revealed a long marriage and family in the same house for decades. No central color theme, just lots of memories made.
His parents had always kept up with the times. They never saved mementos. Only his school pictures were framed and set out on the bookshelf.
He waited in the living room, not comfortable with interfering in the drama unfolding down the hall.
“I don’t want to go anywhere with you!” Junior shouted.
“Junior...” Drury’s shocked tone drifted off.
“He kept asking where you were last night,” her mother said.
He’d felt they’d abandoned him. His reactions were getting worse, not better. During a time when he needed stability the most, when he’d begun to overcome a terrible tragedy, his mother kept leaving him. Now he feared she’d leave for good—just like his father.
“We were trapped in a snowstorm,” Drury said. “Now come on, you have to come with me.”
“No, I don’t!”
“Go with your mother, Junior. Your grandpa and I need to run some errands this afternoon.”
“I can go, too.”
He saw them as stable. His grandparents didn’t leave him.
“No. You have to go with your mother,” Madeline said.
“I don’t want to go with her!”
Now instead of pushing just Brycen away, he pushed his own mother, lashing out. But that lashing was really a cry for help.
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