'I'm so sorry, Fitzwilliam, to have hurt you so badly. And all this time you were a totally different man than I thought.'
They'd had that discussion before, Elizabeth convinced he had been merely reticent, that his bad manners had been the result of an unacknowledged love, but Darcy knowing better, part of his suffering had been wholly deserved, and to have Elizabeth in his arms, here and now, and whenever and wherever he might want to, totally made up for whatever he had suffered.
'You'll help us, won't you Elizabeth?' Georgiana didn't hesitate to break the introspective mood, this had to bother her more than she admitted.
'Help you with what, Georgiana?' Elizabeth didn't quite understand the trouble they would have facing Wickham, with his superior people-skills against their respectability.
'George Wickham of course! What if he asks me to dance?'
Chapter 26
Now she understood, very endearing to see it finally dawn on her, Jane had apparently reminded her but Elizabeth just didn't see a problem in the situation. She wouldn't, she could handle Wickham any day, she'd give him a pert retort and watch him slink off to lick his wounds. But Georgie and himself just weren't made that way.
'I'm sorry once more,' Elizabeth addressed first Georgie, then himself, 'I didn't think Fitzwilliam would expect any trouble facing him, ignoring him worked just fine in the past, didn't it, love? And you must have spent hours with him, arranging his marriage? How did that go about? You had to speak to him then, didn't you?'
That was true, but it was different, there were no other people present and Wickham was clearly the scoundrel, even Mrs Younge had been disgusted with his behaviour. But most people in Hertfordshire still believed what Elizabeth once believed, that Darcy had ruined George Wickham just for the fun of it.
'You've seen me in company in Hertfordshire, Elizabeth. I handled Wickham easily enough when we were by ourselves, I had a mission and I was going to bring it to a successful conclusion, no room for niceties. But a wedding is all about social graces, and heaven knows I'm not liberally endowed with those, especially not among people who have such a dislike against me, whereas Wickham has nothing but social graces, and is especially popular with the good people of Hertfordshire.'
He even managed to say 'good people' without sounding sarcastic.
'If that is your problem, Fitzwilliam,' Elizabeth said with great conviction,
'rest assured that your marriage to a local girl will have softened most of the neighbouring families towards you, as well as your friend's marriage to my sister. And don't forget that Bingley is still at Netherfield, making friends with everyone for miles around, as his friend and my husband you will be
more than welcome. Besides, Wickham left a lot of debts behind, and do you for a moment entertain the illusion that one of the neighbouring families doesn't know that Wickham seduced a sixteen-year-old girl to elope with him and live with him in sin for several weeks? No matter how shameful that is for our family, it reflects on Wickham most of all. He undoubtedly still doesn't feel the shame, but don't think the Hertfordshire people will ever fall for his charms again. They will be ready to receive you as one of their own, and shun Wickham. Of course that doesn't help Georgiana, no-one knows what happened within your family but my sister Jane, whom I couldn't help confiding in. But Georgiana, she's the most thoughtful and discrete person in the world, no-one will ever hear anything from her.'
'Never mind, Elizabeth,' Georgie observed, 'I'm kind of glad she knows, so thoughtful of her to think of me and remind you. If Miss Bingley knew I'd be horrified. Or Mrs Wickham, and Wickham probably told her, they're married.'
'My sister Lydia lived in sin for weeks, Georgiana, until your brother forced her to marry. If he hadn't, she would have continued as she was and enjoyed it until Wickham left her, with child probably. I blush to even think of it.
Imagine what it would have cost us, her sisters. But the memory of having lived in sin doesn't cause my sister any shame, so reminding her of it will not bother her. Should she bug you, tactfully inform her you have a fortune of your own, that'll shut her up.
What if you should make friends with Kitty, Georgiana? If you join the young girls you need not listen to anyone, you can just ignore the adults, dance as much as you like and never stop to talk politely to anyone unless you want to. Can you stand her company at all? If we promise her a few weeks in London with Maria Lucas she'll be your best friend forever and you'll not be burdened with her all the time. I'll be expected to invite her over anyway, you may as well profit by it. I wonder that she hasn't written yet, and that my father hasn't called on us before now. Though he dislikes town, he says there is too much dumb folk there, but I suspect him of feeling rustic. Not being able to look down on everyone would bother him a lot.'
'I hope you don't talk about me in such a way, Elizabeth,' Darcy couldn't help commenting, though he knew she'd rub it in.
'Of course not, Fitzwilliam, I wouldn't dare. People would censure, slight and despise me.'
Her cheeky face was worth millions, and she added, 'Besides, while I had
months to consider spending my life with you, no-one ever gave me a choice about my family.
Anyway, I guess I'm just happy to see them again so soon to rattle away like that, even Lydia, I wonder how being married agrees with her.'
'I suppose I would like to join the young crowd if your sister helps me, it would be a total novelty but maybe a good experience, I've never been with girls my age. You think they'd let me?'
'Sure, Kitty and Maria are very nice girls, and they merely dance with the young men, they don't flirt. Do you expect any young bachelors of name and fortune, Fitzwilliam?'
Darcy tried to recall Bingley's acquaintance but he didn't come up with anyone in particular, which didn't mean there would not be any, one never knew.
'Not off the top of my head, no. You aren't planning to marry Georgie off, are you?'
Of course that was said with a smile, for Darcy knew Elizabeth was planning no such thing.
'Certainly not, poor girls go first, they need to marry to secure their future, Georgiana need have no fears of becoming destitute so she can wait until she actually wants to marry.'
Though Elizabeth said this in a droll way, it was clear she was deadly serious, marrying well was important to girls who were of gentle breeding but poor, like Elizabeth herself when she had still been a miss. And she was not done explaining.
'If there are eligible young men to be impressed, young, unmarried girls are less likely to welcome a richer, more accomplished girl with better connections in their midst. But I suppose Kitty is not that conniving, and Maria certainly isn't, she's singularly sweet. Do you remember her from Hunsford, Fitzwilliam?'
'You mean Mrs Collins' younger sister? I cannot say I got to know her, but I suppose that is your whole point, she's sweet and inconspicuous. I have nothing improper to accuse her of, she seemed perfectly polite and unassuming. But let's still take this up with Simon,' Darcy finally offered,
'maybe he has some improvements. I know where I stand now, so I'll be perfectly ready to meet George Wickham, even if he asks either of you to dance with him. And Georgie, we'll take good care of you of course. I
suppose you'll want to be at the piano part of the night anyway, since hearing anyone else play will grate on your ears and nerves.'
They had long since arrived in the dining-room, where Elizabeth showed them several sketches Mrs Annesley had made of their ideas for a centrepiece. One sketch immediately caught Darcy's attention.
'That one, that should be present in this house as well as Pemberley, and the colours will be magnificent in embroidery. Do you really think anyone, even Mrs Annesley, can capture that with needle and thread?'
'She assures me she can. I'm glad you like it best, I did, too. What do you think, Georgiana?'
'It's grandmother, isn't it? On the horse, like the painting in the gallery. It's gorgeous, Mrs Annesley draws well, she never told me. Though I m
ight have guessed, with her needlework so exquisite. Do you think she drew that from memory? I'm amazed.'
'Do you think we should have that image in this house as well, embroidered by Mrs Annesley?'
'I think it is very fitting, Fitzwilliam, and with the border made in blues and purples I think it will fit very nicely in this room. Or were you planning to have it in another room, Elizabeth?'
'No, somehow both dining-rooms seem perfect to place these works, we've adapted the colour scheme to the décor. She has also made some of these sketches for Pemberley, but we are to take them with us and look at them there before deciding. She must have an incredible memory of what the room looks like. You were planning on keeping it exactly as it is, aren't you, love?'
'If you want it as it is, it will stay that way. We'll stun viewers with our most opulent room so they will continue their travels unable to admire the landscape, having been blinded by our wealth.'
'Never mind, Fitzwilliam,' Georgiana observed, 'if I were to visit a great house I would want to see riches, preferably old treasures, not like aunt Catherine's opulence, that's just bragging. But why keep it all hidden? It's not as if you bought all that stuff, you merely inherited it, and a lot of it has history attached to it, years and years of history. Frankly, I like the old dining-room, I wouldn't want the whole house to look like that, but I agree with Elizabeth that we should keep it and even add a few riches of our own, Mrs Annesley's amazing needlework being a perfect example. It's the one
thing I was never any good at.'
'Do you regret that, Georgiana?' Elizabeth asked in a friendly tone.
'Sometimes it does bother me, yes,' Georgie replied, 'for needlework is about the only activity one can busy oneself with in company without being offensive. Playing is not done unless the mood turns to music, drawing is not acceptable, reading is absolutely prohibited, but sitting and talking would be so much more endurable if my hands were occupied.'
'When did you last try?'
Laughing, Georgie replied, 'That must be years ago, I gave up even before Mrs Younge told me embroidering was for meek little housewives, offering to teach me drawing and decorating instead. Then when Mrs Annesley's work showed me Mrs Younge hadn't been altogether right, I was disheartened by the level of her skill. I knew I'd never reach those heights, and by then I had acquired quite some drawing skills.'
'Will you let me teach you? I know some decorative techniques that will sharpen your proficiency without looking like little girls' work. When you've mastered those we'll ask Mrs Annesley for tricks of the trade and improve together. Deal?'
'Deal. I'll be expected to behave in company more and more, so I'd better learn some respectable occupation to keep my attention to what is said. But, if you teach me needlework, I want you to let me help you start playing again, Elizabeth. Fitzwilliam says you haven't played at all since you two got married.'
'I never play the piano unless forced to, either because there is no other person available who can play and there is a need for music, or because someone asks whom I cannot refuse. No-one did, so I didn't play. Which is also the main reason why I'll never be any good as a pianist, I just don't play on my own initiative.'
'And we thought you didn't dare to play because Georgiana is so proficient at it,' Darcy observed.
Now Elizabeth laughed and admitted, 'That too, of course. But Georgiana rarely plays folk music or simple tunes, and I really like those, so sooner or later I think I would have sat down and played me some.'
'Let's do so now, Elizabeth,' Georgie urged, as if she hadn't just played the piano for nearly two hours, 'I like folk music, truly, especially to sing along with. Let's just play together for half an hour, and then you can go out with
my brother all afternoon.
They indeed sat down at the instrument together, and though Darcy really had some letters of business that needed his attention, he could not seem to leave the room.
Having heard a real master play just this morning, and really appreciative of Mr Fielding's qualities and Georgie's superior playing, he still melted as soon as he heard Elizabeth play and sing. Of course she was not a virtuoso, she even made little mistakes here and there, but her voice was so clear and sweet and the songs she chose were so poignant and feeling, it really moved him to hear her play again. It had been such a long time ago, at his aunt's house in Kent, and he had been so very much in love then, and so very unaware of what he was going to suffer for that love very shortly.
The memories were still so vivid, it really took some time for him to realise that was all they were, memories. Elizabeth was his forever, he could ask her to play for him whenever he wanted to. And if he were to stand close to the piano and watch her as she played, she would look at him with love instead of what he now knew had been sincere irritation, not the invitation he held it for.
As soon as the memory was dealt with and Darcy was once again aware of his surroundings, he noticed that Georgie had Elizabeth teach her one of the songs she had played, but was giving her sound advice on her application at the same time, playing little bits of the song as they should be played, showing the correct fingering and posture. She was very subtle, and seriously eager to learn the song, which made her doting brother think she had to be a born teacher. Soon both sisters played the song together, and already Elizabeth's playing sounded much firmer and more assured.
'I like this music,' Georgie said enthusiastically, 'Eric will have a cat should he hear it, but I'm going to order some sheet music, and study it for evenings at home and for parties. I'm sure your sisters used to love these songs to dance to.'
And as Darcy indignantly realised that his sister just called Mr Fielding by his first name,
Elizabeth laughed and said, 'They did, they'll probably force Mary to play them now, though her taste runs towards what you usually play. I'm afraid you'll hear plenty of it once we're in Hertfordshire.'
'I'll just have to get over it. At least the piano will be in tune.'
At least his sister was planning to do something she thought her teacher would not agree with, which was quite a miracle, she used to be so eager to please everyone. Personally, Darcy thought Mr Fielding would not mind Georgie playing folk music at all, her teacher truly loved music, most music, not just the kind he heard in his own mind. Eric.
To test his theory on his beloved's reaction to his presence he got up and walked towards the piano with deliberation, watching his beloved and his sister play together, and sing together. At first, Elizabeth was so caught up in the action that she didn't even see him, but Georgie did, and despite having no clue of the past she gave him a big wink. When Elizabeth finally did look up and saw her husband standing there, she actually blushed and said impulsively, 'Oh Fitzwilliam, my love, you're such a handsome man, and I never even noticed. I merely thought you very impressive then, but not in a good way, it truly felt as if you were trying to disconcert me by looming over me.'
The sweetness of her gaze and her obvious admiration almost overcame the memory of the love he had felt for her even then. But Elizabeth now included Georgie in the conversation by radically changing the mood to humorous.
'Although, maybe the difference is just knowing you are ticklish.'
'Is he?' Georgie asked, ignoring the reminiscences going on around her all day, of situations she had never witnessed or even known of.
'Decidedly so,' was his beloved's answer, 'I've noticed it gives a girl a real advantage when dealing with a tall and strong man. If you ever find a man impressive, just imagine him breaking down in giggles when you tickle him.
I'm certain you'll find instant courage to face him.'
'As a person who did his share of roughhousing in his schooldays, let me advise you that most men are in fact totally insensitive to tickling. Your new sister may be so fortunate as to be able to render me totally helpless with a mere touch of her finger, it only works on the most sensitive of our gender.
Of course those are the most desirable specimens an
yway....'
'I'll keep them in mind, both insights. I suppose Wickham is not ticklish, being the most insensitive person I know. Too bad, for it'd make me feel safer around him to know he has a weakness like that.'
'Actually, Georgie, Wickham used to be very ticklish as a boy, he may still be. He was very sensitive, during his first years at school I really had to
stand up for him, he lost his composure really quickly and was put upon a lot because of that. My father asked me to take care of him so I did, I was a tall, strong boy two years his senior and very fond of little George. I suppose that changed when mother passed away, and you still so young, father called me into his study and asked me to take up part of my duties as his heir, to make sure the estate wouldn't be left without guidance should something happen to him as well.
From that moment on my life was very busy, I spent all my spare time on learning how to run an estate, and my holidays with my father and Georgie, and I'm afraid I may have neglected George. He started to slide towards his later behaviour more and more, but I no longer had influence over him, and when I mentioned Wickham's extravagance to my father one time when it first started to show, he merely said very fondly, 'Yes, George certainly likes the little comforts of life, doesn't he? He gets that from his mother, dear Victoria, she used to enjoy life so much.'
That was all he said and I never dared mention it again, not even when it got out of hand, he was so fond of Wickham and as indulgent towards him as if he were my younger brother. I guess I was a bit jealous, too; all my father and I did together was work hard and mind Georgie, while Wickham got to spend my father's leisure time with him, and I suppose I was ashamed to feel jealous. I was the heir after all, and Wickham had no inheritance to look forward to. When father fell ill he did tell me he had made provisions for Wickham, and he made me promise to keep a watchful eye on him. Well, you both know how that turned out. In a way I feel responsible for George Wickham's downfall, though I guess my influence on his was less than my father's, and father either didn't know, or didn't want to know the truth about his favourite.'
Revelations Page 33
