by Kimber White
My eyes widened with doubt. “Tucker. I felt like I was going to die. Physically die if I didn’t have you inside me. I can’t imagine what you must have thought when you came back into the cabin. What I must have looked like.”
His laughter was low, dripping with sin. “God, you looked sexy as hell. It was almost worth it to torture you a little longer just to feast my eyes on you writhing on the ground like that, begging me to fuck you.”
I gave him a playful swat on the chest. “You’re a brute.”
He held me against him and kissed me. “I’m sorry. Truly sorry. I should have prepared you better for what’s happening to you. Let me do it now. There are things you need to understand about what being marked by me really means.”
I sat up, hugging my knees to my chest. Tucker propped himself up on one elbow then leaned forward to kiss me on the shoulder. “From now on, your need to couple will be as powerful an urge as breathing or eating.”
I smiled, and felt a slow blush creep into my cheeks. It was odd to feel shy all of a sudden after the show I’d just given him. I’d never been a prude, but sex just hadn’t been an important part of my life until now. I’d had half a dozen partners and while it had been good, it was nothing like this. Tucker had coaxed pleasure out of me in ways I’d never thought possible.
“And it won’t turn me? I won’t become a wolf, like you?”
Tucker shook his head. “No. Not unless you have were blood in you already. Do you? I mean, I don’t sense any.”
“Were blood? Me? Um . . . that would be a no. My dad said I had a great great something grandfather that was some kind of Mohawk tribal elder. But werewolf? No. I think I would have heard about that.”
“Mahican huh?” Tucker raised a brow and looked lost in thought for a moment, but came back and shot me a devastating wink. “But what we’ve done will change you. The longer you stay with me, with the pack, the more you’ll become a part of us. You’ll sense us when we’re not with you. And we’ll sense you.”
“So what happens now?”
Tucker smiled. God, those sexy full lips. I wanted them on me all the time.
“Now, we teach you how to run with the pack.” He raised and lowered his brows and gave me a sinful wink.
“Like actually run? Is that all you do out here? Ride around in patrol cars, rescuing stranded, helpless women?”
Tucker leaned over and kissed the space between my neck and earlobe, making me shiver in delight. “Jake’s the only one who rides around in a patrol car. He’s not a real deputy. He’s private security. Hidden Forest is a private park. I own it.”
“You own the whole forest?”
Tucker nodded. It seemed my wild man was also a man of means.
“We own a sort of wilderness store up north in the northernmost part of the state. That’s where I really call home. I don’t have much to do with the day to day operations anymore, but I’ve wanted to expand and open a location down here. We’ve been scouting out property.”
“A wilderness store?”
Tucker reached behind him and grabbed a hoodie off a chair near the fireplace. He tossed it to me. I turned it over. It was from Wild Lake Outfitters.
“This is you? This is your definition of a wilderness store?” Wild Lake Outfitters was a national brand. Practically every kid I knew had a fleece hoodie bearing this logo. They also sold hunting and fishing gear. My father had been a bow hunter and used to rave about their products.
“It’s done pretty well,” Tucker said, shrugging.
“Wow, I’m impressed.” I ran my hand over the raised white lettering and the familiar pine cone logo.
“You sure you’re really okay with all of this?” he asked, peering into my face. “Taking me on is one thing. But, you’re connection to the rest of the pack is going to grow stronger. Do you have questions?”
I nodded. “I feel that already, Tucker. Even with the others.” My voice dropped. Something happened when the rest of the pack came into the room. I didn’t want to admit it to myself, and I sure as hell didn’t want to admit it to Tucker. What would he think of me?
“You wanted them,” Tucker said. I couldn’t tell if it was a question or a statement. There was no accusation in his tone.
“I don’t know,” I answered. “I felt something.”
He smiled and brushed his hand down my arm. “It’s natural, Neve. The pack and I are connected. You’re connected to me. You’re connected to the pack. We belong to you now. And you . . . belong to us.”
My breath hitched. It was like I couldn’t draw air. Spots swam in front of my eyes as Tucker’s words sank in. I struggled with twin emotions and understood neither of them. You belong to us.
I stumbled out of the bed. It was like I couldn’t get my legs to work as I staggered back into the living room, clutching the wall for support.
You belong to us.
Things the others said slammed into my brain. Mal’s voice. Does she know what this means for all of us? Jake’s. I knew you were the one.
Oh God. Oh God!
“Neve,” Tucker called from the bedroom. I wanted to go to him and I wanted to run away.
You belong to all of us.
I knew what it meant. The need I had. The rising desire. As each of Tucker’s pack walked into the room, I had wanted them. All of them. My head warred with my heart. It was Tucker. I belonged to Tucker. He filled my thoughts, my dreams. And yet, I craved the others too. Even Mal. The way his eyes raked over me with cold menace and lust–it was my lust too.
Chapter Thirteen
I ran to the door, not knowing what I wanted or where I needed to go. Just somewhere. Anywhere. I stood in the open doorframe, a cool breeze skittering over my naked flesh, although I wasn’t cold. Far from it. I burned with heat from the inside out. I heard a wolf’s howl in the distance and it vibrated through me, making me shudder. It was Barrett. Tucker had been right. I could already sense the others. Reed’s howl rose to join it and soon the woods erupted in chorus of high wails that set my hair on end.
Their song was a welcome. To me, about me. I had the urge to run out to greet them. And yet the pull of Tucker kept me rooted to my spot.
“Neve.” His voice was soft as he came to stand behind me, pressing against my body in a solid wall of muscle. “Come inside. We still have a lot to talk about.”
I turned to him. The night cast him in blue shadows, but I could see the moon reflected in his eyes. “I’m afraid.”
His expression softened and filled with unspeakable tenderness. “I’ll never hurt you. None of us will ever hurt you. Each one of us would die for you now.”
I barked out a laugh. “Even Mal?”
Tucker smiled. “Even Mal. Maybe especially Mal. He’s my second in command. It’s his place to challenge me. It keeps me stronger. And what strengthens me strengthens the pack.”
I went back inside with Tucker. The steady beat of his heart calmed my own as I took a seat on the couch nearest the fireplace. “What do you mean, I belong to all of you?” I shuddered as I waited for him to answer, afraid of what he’d say, even though my heart already knew.
“It means what I said. Every member of this pack is sworn to protect you now.”
“But that’s only part of it. Tell me the truth, Tucker. What do you expect of me?”
He smiled. “There will be times . . . many times when I’ll need you to obey me without question. But I swear, I’ll never hurt you, and anything I ask of you will be for your own safety, or the good of the pack, even if you don’t understand why. And I hope that you can love me as much as I love you.”
A tear slipped from the corner of my eye and my heart ached. “I do. Tucker, I don’t understand it, but I do. I love you so much. How is that possible? I’ve only known you for a few days. This isn’t what was supposed to happen. I’m supposed to be at college. I promised my father...”
At just the thought of my father, my grief took over. I’d kept it at bay for so long. First with my plans to
leave for U. of M., now with everything that had happened with Tucker and the pack. I hadn’t let myself feel any of that pain. Now, I sat naked before Tucker in both body and mind. He had laid me bare. A crushing wave of grief choked my heart.
Tucker came to me and enveloped me in his arms. And I cried. For the first time since my father’s funeral, I let myself sob as Tucker held me and rocked me through it.
He peppered soft kisses across the top of my head. He said sweet words and held me close. The pain washed through me and over me. I don’t know how long we sat like that, but when I finally cried myself dry, there was nothing left but me and Tucker. And peace. Somehow, he’d made me face my fears and I felt stronger. Strong enough to ask the question that tormented me the most at the same time it woke something powerful within me.
“You said you expect me to obey you. You said I belong to the pack. That means you expect me to mate with the rest of them, don’t you?”
My heart thundered behind my rib cage in a wild mixture of fear and desire. God help me, I wanted him to say yes, though it terrified me. Tucker’s eyes blazed, hot and feral. He straightened his back, his grip tightened around my shoulders.
“You will never mate with anyone but me. But mating is one thing. Fucking is something else altogether.”
Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit.
Tucker smiled, and some of that devilish playfulness came back into his eyes. Somehow, it didn’t make me feel any better. I realized then he was enjoying this. So much so that his erection began to throb against my leg. My own answering heat threatened to make me lose focus.
“Tucker.” I made my voice sharp.
He smiled again. “Neve, some alphas would make you couple with anyone and everyone at their whim to prove your submission. I’m not one of them. As far as that goes, you always have the right to choose. I told you, part of the change you’re going through will make your need for sex as important as breathing. Sometimes I have to hunt for days or weeks at a time and I won’t be able to take you with me.”
I shuddered. The idea of not having Tucker nearby for even an hour made cold fingers of panic crawl up my spine.
“But you are mine,” he said. “The pack knows that.”
“And you’re not answering my question.”
He kissed the top of my head again. “I have. You’re just trying to understand the answer. I told you, you get to choose. You’re my mate, but you’re free to take your pleasures from the rest of the pack too.”
I pulled away from him, my heart racing. I felt naked, cold, and terrified. I struggled to reconcile the woman I was before Tucker came into my life with this new person I had become in just the span of a few days. The old me would be horrified at even thinking about giving myself to relative strangers like that. Now, though? Something deep and powerful stirred within me, shaking me to my core.
“Neve?”
I crossed the room, pulled on my t-shirt, and found my crumpled jeans where I’d cast them aside hours ago in my frenzied lust.
“Neve?”
Tucker came to me but I put a hand up to stop him. I felt his pulse quicken and my own rose to match it. “Neve?” There was hurt and doubt in his eyes, and it tore at me. As much as I wanted to go to him, I had to figure out how much of myself I was willing to change. I needed to think.
“Tucker,” I said. My throat felt raw. “I just need some air. I have to think.”
His shoulders dropped. The pain in his eyes stabbed through me. I wanted to run to him and kiss it away. But, if I was going to do this, if I was going to stay with him and the pack, I needed to do it with my eyes open and my head clear. I couldn’t think straight when Tucker was near me.
“There’s still time,” he said. “For you. I told you I could take away the mark if that’s your choice.”
My hand flew to the back of my neck. The fresh scar pulsed beneath my fingers. It was mine. It was part of me. The idea of asking him to take it away felt as horrifying as asking him to cut off my arm. But even that emotion scared me. Was it real? Did I want it? Or was Tucker’s power over me like some kind of drug? I had to be sure.
“I can’t think straight,” I said again. My voice sounded so thin in my own ears. My heart raced, and I couldn’t tell if it was my emotion or Tucker’s making me feel this panic and uncertainty.
I pressed my hands against my ears as if I could drive Tucker’s power away. It overwhelmed me. I was a moth and he was a bright, burning flame. The urge to go to him was almost too strong.
“Go,” he said quietly. “I won’t follow you. Take the trail to the north. If you stay on park lands, you’ll be safe. Ash’s pack wouldn’t dare cross the boundaries. There’s another cabin about two miles up. Take the jeep.”
He grabbed a set of keys from a hook on the wall, and tossed them to me. His expression was grave as I caught them one-handed. It tore at me to turn my back and walk out of the cabin. But I had to. I had to know whether these feelings I had were real. I couldn’t commit to Tucker, let alone the rest of the pack, until I was sure.
“Just . . .” I turned to him. “A day, Tucker. Just give me a day to think. I need to be sure.”
His face was grim, but he nodded. His dark hair fell over his eye and I wanted to go to him, smooth it back and kiss him. But, I knew if I didn’t take this chance to clear my head, I’d never leave. And I couldn’t truly be Tucker’s unless I understood what was left of myself.
I closed the cabin door behind me, and walked to the jeep. I hesitated for a fraction of a second as I slid the key into the ignition. There was movement at the tree line, and twin pairs of golden eyes flickered. Reed and Barrett. I knew them now instinctively. My heart fluttered at the sight of them, too.
I took a breath, and started the car. The sun rose high over the tree line as I turned the wheel and took the northern trail.
I chanced a look in the rear view mirror just before I followed the curve in the trail. I saw Tucker at the edge of the clearing. He had shifted. He rose tall and strong on his powerful back legs, his silver fur shimmering in the noon sun. He reared his great domed head back, pressing his ears flat. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end as the sound of Tucker’s howl rose behind me, and seemed to fill me from the inside out.
Chapter Fourteen
The cabin was just where Tucker said. I could still hear Tucker’s plaintive howl as I pulled into the short driveway of the log cabin that was a twin to Tucker’s. I parked the car, and stepped out. A breeze kicked up, rustling the tall maples surrounding the cabin as if they were waving hello.
The cabin was made of dark hickory and I sensed Tucker’s presence even several miles away. I knew at once that he’d probably built this place with his bare hands. He and the rest of the pack. I stepped inside. It had sparse furnishings. Just an armchair and couch in the living room. No television. No phone that I could see. It was quiet, tucked away, and solitary. It was exactly what I needed. There was a small eat-in kitchen, and one bedroom in the back. The fridge and pantry were stocked. I could stay here for days, maybe weeks if I needed to. Even though I was just a few miles away from Tucker, his presence faded a bit from my mind, even though I could still feel him with me with every beat of my heart. But even this short distance let me clear my head. I felt like me again already, though I can’t say I wasn’t changed.
Tucker had said he and the pack would always be able to sense me now. For the first time, I understood it to be true. It was hard to describe, but I felt a new warmth that radiated from the inside out. Like I was alone, and yet somehow not. I drew comfort from it.
I walked into the bedroom. There was just a queen sized bed, covered in a red and blue crocheted bedspread. I sat on the edge of it, and took out my phone from my back pocket. If I was going to decide what I wanted to do with the rest of my life, it was time I had a concrete understanding of my options. I had three missed calls, all from my counselor at Michigan. One from just an hour ago. I hit the callback button.
April Ryan, my a
dvisor in the Music Department answered on the first ring. “Ms. Ryan? This is Neve Dalton.”
“Neve!” Her voice was bright and welcoming. “I’ve been so worried about you. We expected you to check in two days ago. Is everything all right?”
I smiled. She sounded so far away, like Ann Arbor was on another continent, rather than just a couple hundred miles across the freeway. “I’m good. I’ve just had some things come up that have sidetracked me a bit. I’m sorry I didn’t check in sooner.”
“Nothing serious, I hope. You’re not ill are you?”
I looked down at my tennis shoes. My laces were covered in dirt and twigs, and I absently picked at them. “I’m not ill. But, I was wondering if there’s an option to defer my admission for a little while longer. Until the winter semester maybe? Would I lose my spot?”
Ms. Ryan let out a deep sigh on the other end of the phone. “That’s disappointing, Neve. I was afraid you were going to ask me this when you didn’t show for orientation. I really do hope you aren’t ill. I know how difficult the last year has been for you. You’ve suffered through so much for someone so young. And I wish I could tell you what you want to hear. But your deferment from last year was conditional on your enrollment in the fall semester. If you can’t make it, I’m afraid your scholarship will have to go to someone else.”
I closed my eyes and let out a breath. This was bad news. Everything I had worked for was about to slip through my fingers. Without the scholarship, I wouldn’t be able to afford U. of M. on my own. The house money would only last so long.
“What is my drop dead limit,” I said. “The fall semester doesn’t start until next week. Can I have a few days to decide?”
I could sense the irritation in Ms. Ryan from the change in her breathing. “Technically, yes,” she said. “But, Neve, you’re reaching a point where you’re not being fair to another student. The longer you wait, the less time that other person will have to prepare. The next student on the list will probably have already enrolled in another program. And this is Michigan we’re talking about, Neve. Obviously I have some bias here, but we are the best.”
