by Kimber White
My stomach growled in protest. “Don’t I get breakfast?” I pouted.
Jake held up a box of donuts and waved it under my nose. “We hunted last night. You can have all these to yourself. But, we’ve got to motor.”
I tried to act casual as I took the donuts from him, but my own wild side flared. I grabbed those things out of his hand as if I hadn’t eaten in my whole life. The pack erupted in good natured laughter and Mal swatted me on the ass again. We left everything else behind and headed for the vehicles. Mal and I climbed into one Jeep; Jake, Reed, and Barrett got into the other. Mal’s tires squealed as he pulled out and headed for the main road.
The weather blessed us and we made good time. I held my breath as we approached the Michigan border as afternoon approached. We’d sensed no activity from other packs the entire way through Ohio. With any luck, Asher’s hold on me had shattered. But, I didn’t need it to sense whether he approached. I could feel everything Mal felt. Mile after mile, the only wolves I sensed came from my own pack.
“The last of the Ohio packs died out decades ago,” Mal said, echoing my thoughts. “Most of the packs in the lower forty-eight were decimated in the Great Pack Wars of the late nineteenth century. Those of us that are left have been fighting to hold on to territory ever since. We’ve had smaller wars since then. But, things had come to at least an uneasy peace when Luke McGraw settled us in Wild Lake. That’s been almost fifty years.”
“Where do the Kentucky packs fit in? I didn’t think there were any natural wolf populations there.”
Mal shook his head. “There aren’t. Any wolf you see in Kentucky is were and there by permission of the Chief Pack. No one outside of the Kentucky packs even knows where the Chief Pack’s sanctuary is.”
I swallowed hard. I think I knew. I had always sensed other weres besides Asher’s pack. He said the caves where he took me stretched for hundreds of uncharted miles. I wanted to tell Mal, but hesitated. If they came after us, if Asher intended to pursue this war, then I would tell the Wild Lake packs what I knew. Until then, I prayed all of the packs could abide by some sort of truce. I’d seen enough bloodshed to last me a lifetime.
Mal sensed my emotions there too. He reached over and put an arm around my shoulder, drawing my head down to him. He kissed me. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you again, Neve. I swore it and I meant it. Now, you have the entire Wild Lake contingent behind you. What’s happening with you is something special. I mean, it would have been anyway, but I need you to prepare yourself.”
“For what?” I stiffened and lifted my head off Mal’s shoulder. I placed a hand over my stomach and looked out at the road. My breath caught as Mal finally crossed the border into Michigan.
“No one’s ever had a human mate come into heat as fast as you did. Let alone become . . . pregnant.”
“We have to be sure,” I said. “Right now it’s just a sixth sense we both have, Mal. That’s not exactly scientific.”
Mal nodded. “I know. But, I know. Do you understand?”
I did.
“There’s a doctor I trust,” he said. “She’s mated to one of the Canadian pack Alphas. She’s human. I’ve asked Bas to get a message to her as soon as he gets home. She’ll come down to Wild Lake if I ask her to. It’s safer than sending you to a regular doctor.”
I nodded and let out a breath. I hadn’t even thought about prenatal care if that’s what I needed. Warmth spread from my fingers where I held them over my abdomen and the tiny life I believed had started to grow there. It almost seemed like he or she could hear me and if so, approved.
“I trust you,” I finally said. “If you say that’s what we need to do, then let’s do it.”
Mal reached over and squeezed my knee. We traveled on. With the sunset came a sharp dip in the temperature. A snow squall kicked up as we neared Ann Arbor. I pressed my forehead against the window as I saw the exit signs leading to the University of Michigan. Barely six months ago I thought my life would start by taking one of those exits. Now, that seemed like it had happened to another girl.
Mal ran a thumb over my knee. That too took some getting used to. He couldn’t hear my detailed thoughts. But, he read my emotions clearly. He had the power to convey a message to me telepathically if he focused and his own emotions ran high. It went both ways, though I sensed he was far better at masking. He’d had more practice. He’d been able to communicate with his own pack that way since the day he was born.
I answered the question I knew he had. “No regrets,” I said. “I made that decision a long time ago when Tucker asked it of me. I know I belong in Wild Lake.”
Mal smiled and focused on the road ahead. It grew easier between us then. I felt the weight of the day settle over my shoulders and I grew drowsy. I rested my head against Mal’s shoulder and let sleep come, sensing we’d have another long night together once we reached our destination.
I woke hours later. The sun had set and a thick blanket of snow covered the world outside. We’d left the highway far behind. Mal deftly navigated the back country roads. I sat up. Mal didn’t have to tell me where we were. I felt it in my bones, my nerve endings, my blood.
He made the lazy turn up one last gravel driveway. Pat and Harold’s charming yellow farmhouse sat at the top of the hill, looking like a Christmas card surrounded by snow covered pines and the big red barn behind it.
Home. I’d finally come back to Wild Lake.
Chapter Fifty-Five
Mal held me close as we stepped out of the Jeep and trudged through the snow up to the main house. Before we got to the porch, Harold threw the door open and nearly went down to his knees. His sightless eyes seemed to search the air around me, then something told him what he wanted to know, whether it was the sound of my footsteps or the scent of the pack.
“Oh my goodness!” Pat’s cry from within brought tears stabbing behind my eyes. When she pushed her way past Harold and bounded down the porch steps wearing nothing but her housecoat and slippers, I lost it.
At barely five feet tall and wide, Pat still had no trouble shoving Mal out of her way either. She threw her arms around me. For two months, through Tucker’s death, my abduction by Asher, and everything that had happened in between, I kept my shit together. But, when Pat cried softly against my shoulder, my tough exterior evaporated. I dissolved into sobs as I brought my arms up and squeezed her tight.
“I thought you were dead, honey. We all thought you were dead.”
Pat reared back and shot out a hand, catching Mal square in the chest. “Your phone works. Why didn’t you call me?”
She pulled away and shot a withering glare at Reed, Barrett and Jake. For the first time since I met him, Mal was rendered just about speechless. He opened and closed his mouth. Finally, he straightened his shoulders and shot Pat his most menacing Alpha stare.
“Let’s go inside. Neve’s exhausted and it’s cold as hell out here.”
We piled into Pat’s house. I grabbed Harold and hugged him when I got to him. He squeezed me tight enough to hurt me, but I let him. He smelled like pine varnish and soap. He’d aged in the weeks since I last saw him and I knew my fate and Tucker’s had caused that. New wrinkles lined his vacant eyes. He seemed strong and frail all at once. Though he held me with a bone-crushing grip, his skin hung off him from the weight he’d lost.
“It’s okay now,” I said. “We’re all going to make it.”
He smoothed my hair back from my face and pulled me close to him again. “You stay put, Missy. My heart can’t take any more of this.”
I made him a promise to do just that, then he led me into the kitchen arm in arm. Pat, being Pat, already had a huge pot of chicken noodle soup warming on the stove. It made me laugh. She made enough to feed an army, but I knew I’d be the only one to eat it. I sensed the tension in Mal and the others the second we stepped foot on Wild Lake lands. They needed to shift and hunt before the next sunrise.
I shot a smile and a wink to Mal over Harold’s head. Go. I�
��ll be fine.
He nodded and he and the rest of the pack hung back as Pat and Harold ushered me into the kitchen. Mal made a jerking gesture with his chin to let me know he was ready to go. I smiled and nodded. They wouldn’t be gone long, but if they didn’t go now, they were liable to shift right here in the middle of Pat’s kitchen. Then we’d spend the rest of the night mending their ripped clothing.
“Scram,” Pat said. She might not be bonded to Mal like I was, but she’d spent her life around weres. She knew what they needed. “Wipe your feet when you get back. I just washed the floors. And you,” she pointed to Mal. “This girl is going to get a solid eight hours of sleep tonight. She looks like she needs it. You sleep out in the barn.”
I burst into laughter at Mal’s expression. He was about to lay into Pat about what he would or wouldn’t do but one look at my face and he backed off. He settled for an irritated chuff, then he and the rest of the pack headed back out the front door, leaving me alone with Pat, Harold, and a heaping bowl of chicken noodle soup.
Chapter Fifty-Six
Later, we settled in the living room in front of the hearth. Harold stoked the fire and gave a knowing look to his sister. I settled in the plush green recliner closest to the hearth and Pat sat across from me.
“Welp,” Harold said, his knees creaked when he rose. “I’m about done for. You ladies add another log to that in a couple hours if you’re going to stay up late gabbing.”
“Got it,” I said, saluting toward Harold. My hand froze at my forehead and I set it awkwardly in my lap. It was an odd habit to break when communicating with Harold. He couldn’t see the gesture, but I always had the sense he picked up on the sentiment.
He smiled and left us. I did a silent three count. There came a great clamoring of metal as Harold ran into the tins Pat kept hanging along the wall near the kitchen stairwell. I clamped a hand over my mouth to hold in my laughter as Harold swore up and down, as was his nightly ritual.
Pat shook her head. When she turned back to me, a shadow crossed her face. She had questions. So did I. She waited while I tried to think of what to say. In the end, I settled for simple.
“I was with Luke,” I said. “He’s well.”
Pat’s hands shook and she placed them in her lap. She nodded as slow tears streamed down her face.
“Why didn’t you ever tell me about him?”
She took a trembling breath and finally met my eyes. “I don’t know. It’s the kind of thing that once you start talking about it, it gets harder to hold certain things in.”
I understood, probably more than anyone.
“Asher’s going to get him killed,” she said. I wanted to protest, tell her pretty things to make her feel better. But Pat understood what Asher had done as well as I did. As long as he stayed Alpha, his pack could never come home to Wild Lake. And they would always face threats from the Kentucky packs. I wished I had something of comfort to tell her. I told her the only thing that mattered.
“Pat, he’s alive. Luke is alive. He’s found a way to survive in the life he chose. The day may come when he can challenge Asher.”
Pat’s eyes went wide. “He can’t win. You know he can’t. Asher is stronger, ruthless. Luke isn’t built that way. He’s too kind to challenge an Alpha.”
“And you haven’t seen him in ten years. I don’t know what he was like at twenty when he left here, but I’ve seen a fire burn within him. I know his soul. Asher might not get to choose. If the Kentucky packs want him out, they’ll take him out. Then, either Luke will rise or he’ll lead that pack back to Wild Lake where they belong. I know that’s what he wants.”
Her body folded in on itself as she exhaled like she’d just set down a heavy burden. Tears came to my own eyes and I bridged the space between us, putting my hand on her knee. “He hasn’t forgotten where he came from. He wants to find a way back.”
I spoke the truth, but of course I wondered exactly what might happen if the Kentucky packs did decide to banish Asher after what had happened. But, there was nothing I could do about it now. Now, I had to find a way to make a new life for myself here with Mal.
Pat must have seen something change in my face. Her posture shifted and she sat back against her chair. I took a breath and asked her the thing that had been on my mind since we came back to Wild Lake.
“Where did you bury him?” I asked. My throat went dry and I swallowed fresh tears. “I’d like to go to him in the morning if the snow lets up.”
Pat wouldn’t meet my eyes; the question caused her fresh pain and I regretted that. But I’d never had the chance to say goodbye to Tucker. If I meant to start over with Mal, I needed to.
“It’s not supposed to let up anytime soon, this storm,” she said. “Harold can predict it better than the weather man, you know. We’re in for a hell of a squall through tomorrow morning. It’s a lucky thing Mal got you up here when he did.”
“He saved me,” I said. “If he hadn’t come for me when he did, things would have gotten complicated.”
Pat’s mouth formed a grim line and she nodded. “I imagine you had to make some difficult choices to find a way to survive what you did. But you did, honey. You came back home. That’s the only thing that matters. Those boys weren’t going to rest until they found you. For a while, I thought I’d lost them all. But they never doubted. They left here right after. Went north to rally Sebastian’s pack for help. They’ve been fighting their way south ever since.”
“I just hope everyone still thinks I was worth it,” I laughed, but Pat didn’t take the bait.
“You are,” she said. She slapped her hands on the armrests of her chair and heaved herself up. She stood beside me and pushed my hair back from my face. “You’re more than worth it. You’ve given new life to this pack in a time when things were gettin’ pretty dark around here.” She leaned down and kissed the top of my head.
“Now you need to get some sleep,” she said. “A good night’s rest and my bacon pancakes in your belly tomorrow morning will do wonders to start putting some color back into those cheeks. Mal and the others will be gone probably until midday. And as far as I’m concerned they can stay out in the barn until the next morning. I’m not letting that boy wear you out.”
A slow blush crept into my cheeks. I hadn’t realized my physical state was that obvious. Pat gave me a knowing glance but moved away and headed up the stairs. She cocked her head to the side and for a moment, it felt like she could see right through me. Could she sense I might be pregnant? Surely not. Still, Pat Bonner had a sixth sense when it came to the Wild Lake packs. But, she didn’t press the matter. Instead, she held her hand out and jutted her chin in my direction. It was past my bedtime as far as she was concerned and she wouldn’t take no for an answer.
She was also right. I could barely make my legs move up the stairs as I made my way to my own bed. It felt like fluffy heaven as I crawled under the covers and rested my head on the pillow. For the first time in months, I let sleep take me without worrying about what could happen when I woke.
***
He flicked an expert tongue over the smooth skin of my thighs, parting them with strong hands as he went. I moaned and arched my back, giving into the heavenly sensation. He knew just when to suck, when to stroke to bring me to the edge of ecstasy and hold me there so that I would do anything and everything he wanted. He made me a slave to his tongue and rough fingers as they played across the slope of my breasts and found my pebbled nipples.
I moaned and carved my fingers through his dark hair. He brought his head up, his silver wolf eyes flashed. Silver. Not gold.
Tucker. My Tucker.
He turned me gently, nudging me to my hands and knees as he kept up the delicious torture of his tongue across my swollen clit. I knew he was nothing more than a fantasy. An intense dream born of exhaustion and the end of everything I’d been through. If I couldn’t say goodbye to him the day I lost him, I still had this. I could still find him in the ether between deep sleep and rising co
nsciousness.
Then he had me on my back again. I reached up, wanting to run my hands along the solid muscles of his back and draw him down to me. His full lips parted in a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. Those stayed haunted as if he also knew the dream wouldn’t last.
I tried to call to him, but no words would come. It’s like that sometimes in dreams. The more I tried, the more distant Tucker became. Then he had no more substance than billowing smoke. Finally, only his silver wolf eyes hovered above me. When I reached up, even those faded into nothingness and I was alone.
I sat bolt upright, my body covered in sweat as a chorus of howling pierced the darkness. Wolves. Many of them. Crying out in battle. My heart thundered in my chest. I threw off the covers and ran to the window.
When the howling rose again, I realized it was only the winter wind whipping through the valley. I pressed my forehead against the cold window glass, looking toward the line of pine trees past the red barn. I closed my eyes and strained my ears, trying to listen for Mal and the rest of the pack. I felt a distant, answering beat that started in my chest and spread warmth through my body. My pack was safe. They were miles away, but all was well.
Pat had laid a shawl over a chair in the corner of my bedroom. I grabbed it and pulled it tight around my shoulders. Though I woke sweating, my skin felt cold. My body temperature swung between extremes all the time now. I suspected it had to do with newly raging hormones and the Heat making things haywire.
Just as I was about to crawl back into bed, movement caught my eye near the barn. The door creaked open and a shadowy figure emerged, leading Ladybug, one of Pat and Harold’s sturdiest mares. I took an end of the shawl and cleared a circle in the frost of the window glass to get a better look.
