by Xyla Turner
“Officer McFadden, what time should I pick the boys up?” he asked.
“Oh, I can drop them off.” I wanted to see D’asia.
“No offense, but it’s not a good look to see them getting out of a cops car.” He raised an eyebrow.
“True, I was going to drive my car.”
“Getting out of any white man’s car is not a good look either.”
He was right again.
“Boys, go over there.” Mr. Henry directed the boys to the stairs.
“You looking for something in particular, Officer McFadden,” He asked knowingly. “Before you lie, let me be clear in that I know the look you were giving to D’asia. I’ve had that same look with my wife before she was my wife.”
“What’s it to you?” I asked.
“It’s everything to me. She’s like family and you know as well as I do. That shit won’t work.”
“What the fuck is it with everyone telling me what won’t work and what will? If we make it work, it’ll work.”
“I’m not sure where you live, McFadden. Thinking you got some connection with Captain McFadden, but if you know like I know, you’d steer clear of D’asia Carey. However, if you were warned away like I was when it came to my Nita. You’ll tell me to fuck off and pursue what you believe is yours.” He laughed. “I know that look in your eyes. Know it well. First time I saw Nita walk to her seat when I was in the ring, I knew she was mine. Nobody could tell me different. That ended my career, cause she was the commissioner’s daughter, but that’s my Nita and always will be. So, this is what I’ll say knowing you are an officer of the law and shit. Are you serious about D’asia, fine? But keep her clear of that bullshit that’s going to come her way as a result. While, she may not get it from you, she’ll most definitely get it from her people and yours. She can handle her people, but yours are the ones I’m worried about, specifically - your mama.”
“My mother has nothing to do with this,” I hissed.
“Not now she doesn't. Move in on someone that she don’t approve of, you better believe those ugly shoes, she will.” He raised his hands like he was surrendering, “Just don’t say you weren’t warned.”
Mr. Henry raised his hand to his head, then saluted me and said, “I should be back around here, when?”
“Six,” I replied.
“Good.” He looked passed me and yelled, “Behave. See you later.”
Byes were issued back to him, as I watched him get in his car while his words whirled through my head. How was it that everybody had a thought about my non-relationship with a woman who would probably slap me silly and had not even called me? With all those warnings, I should probably leave it alone. I told myself that every night as I grabbed my cock and thought of her mouth sucking on my tongue, kissing my chest, taking me fully between her pouty lips. Undressing her to see every angle and curve of her gorgeous body.
There was no way I was going to leave that alone. She was raising her brother because her mother was strung out, trying to provide for a teenager and she was only twenty-three. So young, but taking on the responsibility of a mother and at such a young age. There was no way I was leaving that alone. Honestly, I don’t think I could stop even if I tried.
“Hey darling,” Captain McFadden greeted me with a kiss on the cheek.
“Hey, Mom.” I kissed her back.
“Just in time, as always.” She led me back to the dining room.
Dinner was prepared as always and it was me, my cousin, Jesse, my mom, and uncles just like it was every Sunday. All of them in some way was employed by the police department. Either as an officer, clerk or school safety. My younger cousin, Jesse, was not sure what he wanted to do. It was a toss-up between a teacher, lawyer or an officer. He chose school safety to try it out and see if that would help his decision. While he did that, he also took criminal justice classes at BMCC.
“So, I had to fire one of the guys in my division,” my Mom said, completely off subject.
“What? Another unlawful shooting?” My uncle rolled his eyes. “These lowlifes have the nerve to say we are unlawful when they break the law for a living.”
“No, he was in a relationship with a perp.”
“He didn’t disclose it to the department?” My other uncle asked.
“No, he did not. Stupid bastard. Good cop, too. However, when it came out, it was too late. I had to let him go. The union will probably have him back, but the rest of the force will shame him enough to leave.” She shook her head.
“Ryan,” Jesse called to me.
“Yeah, what’s up?” I replied, glad to get out of the other conversation.
“I was wondering if you aren’t busy on Tuesday, can I go on a ride-along with you after my class?”
“What time does your class end?”
“Eight-o’clock.”
“Sure, my shift won’t end until eleven. That’s fine. Text me the address.”
“Great,” he beamed.
Jesse was as tall as I was, same build and everything. He just graduated from college and was still trying to figure life out. He was twenty-one and his dad, surprisingly, did not pressure him to join the force. My mom, on the other hand, always sent the pressure. Even had other cops in her division encourage him to join. Giving him special treatment and all of that. He didn’t want it and neither did I. Specifically, why I changed my district so I was not under her reign. The good captain did not like that, but I also did not care.
When Tuesday rolled around, Jesse had texted me the information to get him from class. He was outside waiting in front of Myers Hall. The streets were filled with people going to their designated homes and probably coming from class. The vibe of a college campus was always one that I enjoyed. It was like fresh air, a newness, and openness that hovered over all the possibilities that awaited each person that partook.
I missed that.
Jesse and Sal greeted, as he climbed into the back of the patrol car. Sal continued to eat his burger while I buckled up.
“Where we off to?” Jesse asked.
“Well, we are following up on a lead about a murder that happened a month ago.”
“No,” Sal interjected with a mouth full of beef. “Cowboy over here is doing that. The detectives are supposed to do this, but do Ryan listen? Nope. So, I warned him, but he don’t listen to me either.”
As I started to drive away, I saw a woman that looked like D’asia. Her hair was braided back, she had a messenger bag, tight jeans, white and navy Puma’s, and a small jacket. It was March, but it was still cold.
My mind was playing tricks on me. As of late, I thought I saw her everywhere.
“That’s D’asia,” Ryan must have seen me looking. “She’s in my criminal justice class.”
I hit the break, causing a loud screech. I turned to him and said, “You know her?”
Jesse’s eyes were wide with surprise, “Uh, no. She’s just in my class.”
I pressed the ‘woop’ button and hit the lights once to signal for her to stop. Then as I opened the door, I could hear Sal mutter, “Like I said, don’t listen to me.”
Marching over to her, she had panic in her eyes. Probably from the police car and not me, so I hoped.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” she snapped.
Attitude.
She had the nerve to give me attitude.
I grabbed her by the arm and moved her near a corner so we could talk in private without prying eyes.
“Did you forget something?” I asked.
“’No,” she jerked her arm from mine.
“Oh, you forgot something.” I stepped closer to her.
“Back up,” she warned.
“Not until you tell me what you forgot?” I leaned down.
She tried to turn her head and say, “I didn’t forget anything.”
“Oh, you did, sweetness.” I pulled her ponytail that was hanging over her shoulder.
She smacked my hand away, just in time for me to capture it and put
it against the wall. Leaning further down so I could nip her ear, then I whispered, “Now what did you forget?”
My lips pressed against her smooth, warm neck. I kept pecking until I reached her ear again.
“Tell me,” I asked, “What did you forget?”
She sighed, then said, “To call.”
I pulled back, letting her go and begin to pat her down. Once I found my treasure, I pulled out her phone and unlocked it to plug my number in there. Holding it up to her, I said, “See, Ryan McFadden.”
Her lips were parted, displaying a peek of her white teeth and pink tongue. I pressed the call button so I would have the number, then hung up. She snatched the phone from me and put it in her pocket.
“What do you want?” Her lip was turned up.
“A chance.”
“That’ll never happen.”
I shook my head, then said, “No, it could. The grocery store refrigerator, you told me it could.”
“No, I didn’t!” She exclaimed.
“Oh, yes you did.” I got back in her space again, “Your mouth, that tongue, and those fingers told me everything I needed to know.”
She inhaled, “No.”
“Oh, sweetness. You did. Told you. One taste got me hooked.”
Her lips were still parted and her chest was rising and falling rapidly. She was as hot as I was. Damn, the consequences, I went in and took her mouth. She did not fight me at all. Instead, her hands went straight for my hair. My body pressed into hers as I rocked my hips into her. A moan escaped her mouth and I swallowed it, taking more of her. Grabbing her ass, I squeezed tighter, pressing her center into me. Her hips started to move against me and goddamn, I was getting hard.
I pulled away.
We were both panting with wide eyes, staring at the other.
“Fuck.” I sighed as I regained my composure. “Why are you fighting this?”
“You know why,” she breathed and readjusted her bag.
“Stop.”
“You don’t…”
“I said, stop.” Putting my finger to her mouth. “Thursday night. What are you doing?”
She grabbed my finger and moved it down between her breasts again. “I have class.”
“Saturday night?”
She looked at me with squinted eyes.
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
WOOP.
We both turned to see the patrol car ride up.
“Let’s go, lover boy, got a call,” Sal yelled out of the car.
“Fuck,” she gasped and looked the other way.
“Let’s go.” I grabbed her hand.
“I’m not going anywhere with you.”
“Oh, yes the fuck you are. You’re not going home this late. You live on the other side of town. It’s too late for you to be traveling by yourself.”
“Excuse me, Officer, but I’ve been traveling by myself for longer than you’ve been in that uniform. I can take care of myself. Thank you.”
“Well, not on my watch. You’re not.”
I went to pull her, but she pulled back
“I am not getting in that car with you.” She shook her head, fear evident in her eyes.
“Fine, I’ll drop you off at a corner of the subway station.” I exhaled at the absurdity of these fucking unspoken rules.
“I can get there. I don’t need your help.” She remained adamant.
“D’asia,” I walked her back up against the wall. “You are going to get your ass in that car, even if I need to carry you. I will not, in good conscience, let you leave me and wonder about whether you got home or not. So which way will it be? Walk or be carried?”
She snatched her hand away from mine and walked ahead of me. Murmuring something about, bossy policemen with badges and kicking my ass.
“Howdy,” Sal turned to smile at her.
“Howdy,” she replied in a bored tone.
“Hey, D’asia.” Jesse said when she closed the door.
“Hey, Jess, you in trouble?” She asked in concern.
“Naw, Ryan is my cousin. I am going on a ride along. I’m thinking of being a police officer.”
“Hmm,” she replied. “I see. So you got into this car willingly?”
Sal burst out laughing as I pulled into traffic. I shook my head.
“Yeah,” Jesse chuckled. “You didn’t.”
“Nope,” She emphasized.
“You got a live one, partner.” Sal hit me.
I shook my head again.
“I can take care of myself.” She banged on the window.
Sal continued to laugh, until he was choking.
“Simmer down back there,” I yelled through the thick glass.
“No.” she yelled back.
Sal was bent over with his hands on the dashboard, coughing and laughing at the same time. I eventually had to laugh myself. The entire situation was ridiculous.
“Glad y’all find something funny.” She then turned towards Jesse and said, “I do not like your cousin. I’m sorry he’s related to you. You come off as a nice guy. He’s not.”
“Aww, Ryan is cool. You just got to get to know him. He’s one of the good ones.” She was shaking her head. “Seriously, he’s solid. The only one on the force of cops, I actually trust. Plus, it seems he likes you and he don’t like everybody, so that says a lot.”
She stared at Jesse and then turned around in the seat to glare at me through the mirror. I smiled at her and she rolled her eyes.
When we reached the station closest to her house, I stopped and opened the door for her. I wanted to touch her or kiss her, but I knew eyes were on us and not the ones in the car.
“Saturday,” I called.
“Whatever,” D’asia called back as she power-walked across the street.
“Don’t have me come looking for your ass.”
She flipped me her middle finger and I laughed out loud. When I got back to the car, Sal looked at me for a beat, then burst out laughing again. Once he calmed down, he said, “I take it back. I’m all team D’asia. You should see your face. Smitten.”
“Shut the fuck up.” I shook my head.
D’asia
The man was infuriating beyond all concepts of frustration. A bully is what he was and a sexy one at that. It was three in the morning and I could not sleep due to the nagging thoughts that clouded my mind. My nipples were erect, my panties wet and I was feverishly hot with naughty thoughts of his lips on my breast and between my legs kissing my other lips. Desperately having that taste that he keeps talking about.
Goddamn.
He had not called or texted and I’d be damned if I would be the first. It was juvenile, oh, I knew, but I still would not call. Yeah, he knew some key history about Malcolm X, he actually volunteered his time on Saturdays to help out the boys and educate them on Harlem, New York and all that. That all gave him points, but the thing that trumped all of that was the fact that he was a white cop and this was the real world and I lived in The Trap. There would be no climbing up my fire escape to rescue me. He’d get shanked before he made it to the third floor. We would be targeted as snitches and possibly something worse could happen. I had no intentions of bringing that storm into Zee’s life. This was another reason why I had not had a boyfriend in over five years. This was life and it was mine.
On Friday, around seven o’clock, he called. My heart was beating a mile a minute. I couldn’t answer as I was so nervous. He called right back, but I still did not answer. Then a text from him came through.
Pick up the phone.
It was like he was in my head or something. The phone rang again, so I answered.
“Yes.”
“Smart woman,” he laughed. “I can feel you rolling your eyes.”
I snickered because I was rolling my eyes.
“What are you doing?” He asked.
“Getting ready to eat dinner.”
“You have enough for me?”
“No.”
“Is Zee there?”
>
“No, spending the night, so the boys can get to the precinct on time tomorrow.”
“Ahhh, the Henrys.”
“Yeah.”
“So you’re alone tonight?”
“Not really.”
“What does that mean?” He questioned.
“What I said.”
“D’asia.” He warned, “You don’t want to rattle me, sweetness.”
For some reasons, I did not want to rattle him. Well, maybe a little I did.
“I’m not alone, well I won’t be for long. So, what’s the plan for tomorrow?”
“D’asia?” He growled.
I loved the way he said my name.
“Yes,” I cooed.
“I’m headed over.”
“No, no. I was just kidding.” Panic rose in me.
“You’re lucky. My shift doesn’t end until eleven. I want to see you though.”
“You’ll see me tomorrow, right. What are the plans? Where am I meeting you?”
“I’ll tell you tonight, after my shift.”
“What?” I asked.
“Ready, partner.” A voice said in the background.
“Yeah, gotta go. Talk to you later.” He said and the phone hung up.
Did he just say he was coming over after his shift? No, he probably meant calling after shift. I’d have to make sure I was sleep, so I couldn’t answer the phone. The man was crazy.
The clock read 11:30 PM. I was in bed, watching SVU, when the knock came to my door. Dread seeped into my body as I remembered our conversation. I slowly made my way to the door, trying not to make any noises, so I could pretend I was sleep or something. Then my phone rang. The screen showed, Ryan McFadden calling.
Shit.
I unlocked all three locks, but kept the latch on.
“Yes,” I asked.
“Open the door.” He raised an eyebrow at me.
The man was dressed in a leather jacket, jeans and Timberland boots.
Interesting.
“Do you need me to yell Police, for you to open it?”
“No, that’s not necessary.” I closed the door and slid the nob to the left.
Exhaling, I opened the door while holding the table, knowing that as soon as I made the decision, there would be no turning back. Allowing this man to enter my life was bound to come with its own set of hurdles. More shit I didn’t need, but really I don’t think I could help it, even if I tried. He was pulling me under and I swear I fought the good fight, but I was losing to him.
