by Imogen Rose
I nodded, he was obviously right. Something had changed. How would I ever begin to explain it all when even I didn’t understand any of it? All I knew for certain is that Kellan was everything to me.
I had to find a way to make him understand that at least.
He touched my fingers waiting for a response. I looked up at him.
“Kellan, you’re right. I do need to talk to you too, to try to explain. I don’t know how. I’m afraid that you’re going to think I’ve lost my mind.”
He looked at me reassuringly, nodding for me to go on.
“Kellan, it’s a bit of a long story. Can I tell you tonight?”
He smiled, “Putting it off again?”
“No, I will. I promise.”
“I guess I can wait.”
I pulled back into the traffic and headed to school. We were late. The car park was empty of other students, just rows of parked cars and bikes. We walked over to the office for our late passes.
Dr. Lee was already in class, deep in lecture mode and didn’t look pleased with us interrupting. As we handed him our passes, I looked over to Maria and froze as I spotted Justin in the seat behind mine. I had totally forgotten that he sat there next to Kellan, right behind me. Kellan could feel my body stiffening and followed my gaze. Justin glared back at me with a challenging snarl. Kellan shot him a warning look as we walked silently to our seats. I had a hard time concentrating, acutely aware of Justin’s presence behind me. I kept my eyes on Dr. Lee, pretending to drink in every word he said. I breathed a sigh of relief when the bell finally rang and the longest physics class in history was over.
Kellan was over at my side before I had time to even put my books back in my bag. He got between Justin and me as Justin passed my desk on his way out. I didn’t look up but heard Justin whisper, “Her bodyguard now?”
I looked up at him and hissed, “No, yours!” as I stormed out.
I could hear Justin laughing as Maria, Ariele and Kellan ran up after me. Kellan grabbed my shoulders and turned me around.
“You promised!”
I shrugged apologetically.
Ariele exploded, “What do you expect her to do? She can totally take Justin, has before!”
Maria and Kellan stared at her, as did I in total shock!
“What do you mean?” they demanded in unison looking at her expectantly.
I interrupted, “Nothing!”
“Kellan, you know that I said that I would explain all this to you tonight? Please bear with me. Maria, we better get to class. See you at lunch, Ariele?”
Ariele nodded apologetically and hurried off. Kellan followed us to computer lab and said to Maria, “Look after Fight Club girl, will you?”
She nodded as we headed in.
Computer lab was a welcome relief. Mrs. Goldner was sweet and easy going and messing around on the computer is second nature to me. It was over way too soon for my liking. I was not looking forward to lunch. I thought about skipping it and going for a walk to clear my head instead. The save the insane fight club girl group would, no doubt, insist on coming with me. Just imagine it, mother goose and her ducklings out for a walk. I decided to go to lunch.
Maria walked me over to the cheer table. They all looked ready to pounce. She whispered, “I’ll get you some lunch, good luck!”
I imagined getting up on the table with a song and dance routine to totally freak them out, but it would probably mean a full psych exam and missing the next hockey tryout. So I sat down and waited for the onslaught.
Julia first: “Arizona Darley, have you gone completely mad! You can’t give up cheerleading! We won’t let you!”
The others joined in:
“You tried out for hockey? Ice hockey!”
“You kissed Kellan?”
“You hit Justin?”
I started to laugh, “Girls, yes, I’ve gone totally insane! So, who’s coming to cheer me on at hockey tonight? I need my girls there. May need you to help me fight Justin and his posse, too!”
The girls (well, apart from Ariel) looked at me in horror.
“I’m ok. Really!” I quickly reassured them.
Ali spoke up, “Remember when Cassidy decided to try out for the lacrosse team? This is the same. We should support Arizona. I watched her tryout last night; she’s awesome! Justin’s just jealous.”
Julia looked at me. I nodded at her.
“Arizona, if this is something you really want to do, why didn’t you talk to us about it first? We need you on the squad.”
“Julia, you’re too sweet. I love being on the squad but you don’t need me. Ali took over when you were ill. She’s great, much better than me as vice captain.”
Ali shook her head but I continued.
“I really want to give this a go. It’s not going to be easy. The boys are having a hard time accepting a cheerleader as a player.”
A murmur of anger went through the group.
“So, I think we should show them, right girls?”
Julia and Ali looked at each other. Ali said, “Jules, she’s one of us, will always be even if she’s not cheering. Let’s go watch her play tonight.”
Julia nodded, “Ok, Arizona. Show us why you are giving up cheering. And is it true about Kellan?”
I wasn’t sure how to respond so I got up and said that I needed to use the restroom. Maria, Ali and Ariele got up to come with me.
“You’re kidding, right?” I asked in dismay. “Sit back down, I’m just going to the restroom. Be back in five.”
They looked at each other hesitantly but sat back down. I sauntered over to the restrooms keeping a look out for Justin. There were no signs of him so I slipped into the girl’s restroom. I could hear someone come in when I was in the far stall. I peered under the stall door, just some girl. I waited for her to enter a stall before I exited mine to wash my hands. As I was watching the water drip into my hands and then into the basin making random patterns, the stall door opened and Simla came out.
“Hi, Simla! How’s it going?”
“I thought we were friends, Arizona,” she growled at me with her eyes blazing.
I took a step back, she looked insanely furious.
“We are.”
“Not any more. How dare you threaten Justin?”
“He started it!” I said, sounding like a four year old.
“I’ve warned you before. I know all about your little family. I am sick of you treating us like this. Time someone teaches you a little lesson.”
She took a step toward me and I backed up against the basin losing my balance. As I tried to steady myself, she launched herself at me taking me completely by surprise. She grabbed my throat with her hands and squeezed my neck until I could no longer breathe.
~
“Where is Arizona, Maria?” asked Harry.
“She just went to use the rest room, she’ll be back in a second.”
“Who went with her?”
“No one, Harry. She wanted to go on her own. For goodness sake, she has to have some privacy!”
Kellan came in to the cafeteria and bumped into Harry as he was rushing out with the girls on his heels. He turned and joined them as they ran along the corridor.
“What’s going on? Where is Arizona, Harry?”
“In the restroom. By herself.”
They reached the restroom in seconds.
“Maria, go in and check, will you? Harry asked.
Maria gingerly entered the restroom. Her eyes were immediately drawn to the floor by the sinks. Arizona lay on the floor, her hands on her neck, writhing in pain. Maria froze and then screamed.
“Harry!”
The door flung open and everyone rushed in all at once. Kellan reached Arizona first and cradled her to him.
~
I had pretended to pass out when Simla grabbed my neck. I was taken so by surprise that I had not reacted in time to fight her off. I was disgusted with myself. She left as soon as I hit the ground. I couldn’t get back up. Something hu
rt. I couldn’t pin point what though. I was still trying to get my breath back, my neck stung.
I heard Maria’s scream! At least that meant some help would be on its way. I just needed to keep this from Harry and Kellan. They would be furious. I felt someone pull me in gently – Kellan. I nuzzled into his warm body. My body started shaking. This was just too embarrassing; I had to stop! They more I tried, the more I shook. Kellan held me firmer trying to steady my shakes but they wouldn’t stop.
“We’ve got to get an ambulance, she is shaking.”
An ambulance? No way! I opened my eyes and looked at Kellan pleadingly.
“Please, Kellan, no ambulance. Just take me outside. I need fresh air. It’s so stuffy in here, my neck really hurts,” I whispered hoarsely.
Harry peered over at me and said, “Shrimp, you have to see a doctor. I can take you if you don’t want an ambulance. I’m scared to lift you though. What if your neck is broken or something else?”
“I’m fine, nothing is broken. I’m just a bit bruised and out of breath.”
“You’re shaking, Arizona. You have to see a doctor,” Kellan said firmly.
“Harry, Kellan, please,” I pleaded, tears now streaming down my face.
“Let me get her outside, Harry,” suggested Kellan wearily. “She’s getting really upset. It’s not helping.”
Harry nodded and cleared the room so Kellan had space to carry me out.
“Harry, I’ll take her outside and sit with her. I’ll call you on your cell in about five minutes to give you an update.”
I could hear Harry’s disgruntlement, but as I started shaking even more, he relented.
Kellan sat down in the grass, cradling me in his arms. I was still shaking. Maybe thinking about something calm would stop the shakes. However, my thoughts inadvertently moved to images in the restroom. Simla’s furious eyes as she told me that she knew everything about my family. What ever had she meant? I started shaking even more. I could feel Kellan’s muscles tighten as he tried to steady me. This was beyond humiliating. I didn’t want Kellan to see me like this. I really needed to relax. I tried to concentrate on Kellan touch. It was so warm and comfortable. I felt safe. I tried to enjoy the feeling and could sense my body relaxing. The shaking turned to occasional trembles. I nuzzled into his shoulders and Kellan started stroking my hair. He ran his fingers across my face rubbing away the tears. As the trembling stopped, I became more aware of my burning throat. I needed something to drink. I opened by eyes to gaze into Kellan’s. He looked like he was in more pain than me. I tried to talk but the words came out in whispers, “Water, please.” I closed my eyes again as Kellan reached for his phone.
“Harry, she needs some water, can you bring some out? We’re by the Jeep.”
“Arizona, can you open your eyes again?”
I opened them and gazed back into his.
“Can you move your neck? Where does it hurt? How did this happen? Did you fall? Was it Justin?” I saw his expression change to fury with the last question. I knew it was best not to say anything about Simla, not yet anyway.
I whispered, “Not Justin.” No point in him and Harry going after Justin.
“Then who, Arizona? You have to tell me, I have to take care of him.”
“Later, Kellan. I need some water, my throat burns.”
“Of course you do. I shouldn’t push you. Sorry, Shrimp.” He drew me close again and I buried my head back into his chest.
“Hey, Kellan, how is she doing?” Harry asked, coming up to us.
“She’s been asking for water. Look at her neck. It’s got red blotches. From finger marks, no doubt.”
“Here’s some water, Arizona.”
I felt Harry move my head upright and I opened my eyes to see a water drop fall from Harry’s finger to my lips. I opened my mouth and Harry brought the straw to my lips and I sipped the water contently. The coldness of it felt good despite the burning when I tried to swallow.
“Thanks, Harry, that felt good,” I whispered gratefully.
“Arizona, I need to have a good look at you. Try to stay still and not freak out.” Harry started with my neck. He was being as gentle as he could, but I flinched as soon as he touched it. It was so painful that tears started streaming down my face again.
“Who did this, Arizona? These are clearly finger marks.”
Kellan said, “She’s already told me that it wasn’t Justin but she’s not saying any more. I guess it could’ve been one of the others from his group. We need to know. In fact, the cops are going to need to know.”
The cops? Why did they have to be involved? I would take care of this myself.
“We better get her to the hospital now that she has calmed down a bit. I’ll drive her,” said Kellan.
“Ali, can I take your car? It’s got more room at the back.”
“Sure, Kellan, we’ll follow you in the Jeep.”
I looked around and saw that Ali, Maria and Ariele were there as well.
Kellan picked me up and tried to get me into Ali’s back seat, but I was glued tight to him and wouldn’t let go.
“Kellan, I’ll drive. Try to get in with her, she’s not going to let go of you without injuring herself,” said Harry exasperated.
Kellan nodded and squeezed into the car, not letting go of me. Harry tried to get the seat belt around the two of us. It was not going to work so he let go and got into the driver’s seat to drive us to the hospital. The drive was long and uncomfortable. The bumps felt like stabs to my throat. Kellan had his hand behind my head, trying to steady my head against his chest.
“Arizona, tell me who did this to you.”
I looked at him, “I can’t Kellan. I have so many other things I need to tell you first. But my throat hurts too much.”
He looked at me frustrated, “Arizona, you could have died, just give me a name.”
“Kellan, I can’t. I’m fine.” With that I closed my eyes and fell asleep.
I awoke to someone slapping me!
“Will you stop that!” I screeched as my throat nearly ripped open. I opened my eyes and glared into a set of glasses. I tried to focus, but the glare from glasses made it impossible.
“Kellan, where are you?” I whispered desperately.
“I’m right here,” said Kellan squeezing my hand.
“Hello, Arizona. I’m Dr. Everton. Sorry about the wake up,” he smiled. He proceeded to shine a light in my eyes and poke at my throat.
“Ouch, that really hurts!”
“My apologies, Arizona. I need to check to see if anything is broken. I’m going to send you up for an x-ray.
“Oh, I don’t need that, besides I have to be at tryouts soon.”
I could hear Harry chortling, “Arizona, you’ve got to be kidding. You can’t play hockey today.”
“I’ll get cut!”
“You’ll be ok, Shrimp. Coach will understand,” said Kellan reassuringly.
“Mom and Dad are on their way with Ella, they should be here any minute.”
Great! There was really no need to have told them! I could feel my bed starting to move.
“Taking you up to x-ray. It won’t hurt.”
I clung on to the hand I hoped was Kellan’s as we moved along the corridor. It was strange being moved in this position, hard to get my bearings. Mom and Rupert had clearly arrived. I could hear Harry updating them. Thankfully we couldn’t all fit into the elevator and they had to take the next one. I tried to think of a plausible story that would keep them from annoying me with endless questions. They caught up with me outside the x-ray unit.
“What happened, Arizona?” Mom looked worried and angry.
Rupert took my free hand, “Arizona, you have to tell us. The cops are waiting outside to speak with you once we are done here, but we would like to know as well.”
I could hear Ella crying. She was sitting on Harry’s arm looking down at me.
“I’m ok, Ella. Really, don’t worry.”
“You don’t look ok. Y
ou’re all red and look at your clothes!”
Mom nudged me for answers again; I turned to her impatiently.
“Look, I don’t remember what happened.” I knew it sounded lame, but temporary amnesia was the best I could come up with at short notice. I closed my eyes hoping that they would all leave me alone.
“She looks tired,” said Mom. “Let’s give her some time, if she can’t remember, there is nothing we can do. Stressing her out isn’t going to help.”
I heard a male voice, “Ok folks, it is time for her x- rays. You can’t come in. Please stay here.” Kellan tried to let go of my hand, but I dug my fingers into his until I could feel my nails tearing through his skin. My body started to tremble again.
“I guess you’re coming with us, she is not going to let go,” and with that I was wheeled in for my x-rays.
A whole load of waste of time, as I had told them. Nothing broken. Just bruises around my neck and back where I had fallen. I was forced to speak to the cops briefly before I was allowed to go. I gave them the same story as I had given Mom.
Kellan brought me to my bed and put me down, and I drifted straight off to a thankfully dreamless slumber. I woke, what seemed hours later, in a cold sweat. I felt Simla’s hands around my neck, unable to breathe or scream. I opened my eyes in terror and gazed into Kellan’s face.
His head lay next to mine fast asleep, making heavy comforting sounds. I couldn’t help myself; I touched his hair and the back of his neck and traced the contours of his face until I reached his mouth. I moved closer to his face so his every breath warmed my lips. I gently pressed mine against his. I felt him stir and move against me. Gently at first with the movements becoming more and more frantic. I put my hand under his shirt and against his chest. I could feel him suddenly stop moving and taking hold of both my hands.
“Arizona, what are you doing?”
“I need you.”
“I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. We can’t be doing this though. Not here, not now.”
He was right. I closed my eyes and nuzzled into his warm chest and fell back to sleep.
