Still, she was glad Sydney wasn’t at his desk. He was too damn observant and would ask too many questions. Alexa didn’t have all the answers to her own yet.
Chapter 4
“You asked Jenna’s mother to dinner?” Seth looked at Casey as if he had lost his mind. “Why? I could have gotten you a real date if I’d known you wanted one.”
Casey looked at Seth and shook his head sadly from side to side.
“See, this is why Jenna is no longer in your life. You need your testosterone checked. Have you ever looked at Alexa Ranger? She’s the kind of woman men fight wars over.”
“Fight wars over?” Seth wrinkled his face. “Oh, that’s a military euphemism for sex. I get it. Wait, you’re planning to date Jenna’s mother for sex? Why? Couldn’t you find someone younger?”
Seth dipped his finger in the bowl of chocolate frosting. “I mean I agree she looks great and all, but she’s probably forty-five at least.”
Casey smacked Seth’s hand with the icing spoon. “Actually, she’s fifty.”
Seth made a face and rolled his eyes. “Fifty?”
Casey pointed the spoon at him. “I want to get to know her. I have my own reasons. You should be thanking me for this golden opportunity to talk to her. She might actually put in a good word with Jenna for you.”
Seth looked hopeful for a moment, and then the phone rang. He raced off to answer, leaving Casey to ponder the insanity of his plan to include Seth. The younger man would probably blow it. Casey hoped he could handle his personal interest in Alexa better.
When the doorbell rang fifteen minutes later, he heard Seth answer.
Moments later, Alexa walked into the kitchen carrying a bottle of red wine. She looked like a taller, slightly older, and much more interesting version of Jenna in her loose white shirt and jeans.
She looked liked the first time Casey saw her and was every bit as appealing to him.
“Hi,” she said. “I came straight from work, but I brought wine.”
Casey stopped chopping the vegetables for the salad. He wiped his hands on his apron and walked over to take the wine. Alexa was almost as tall as he was and looked into his eyes as she handed him the bottle.
She smelled like peaches and ginger. When Casey got a good whiff of her, every muscle in his body went on instant alert. His reaction to her was going to be obvious sooner or later. There was only one way to find out how she was going to feel about it.
“What are you wearing? I’m usually allergic to perfume,” Casey admitted, holding her gaze. “I really like what you’re wearing—maybe a little too much.”
Alexa smiled at him, her laugh lines crinkling. “It’s my favorite of the three organic scents I’m looking to start selling soon. Lauren calls this one Revelation.”
“Apt name,” he said. “I think I’m having one myself.”
A knot of need twisted inside Casey, instinctual and insistent on being met. He started to step into Alexa, fully intending to put his mouth on hers. She pushed the wine more firmly into his hands and laughed at the look of shock on his face as he backed up a little.
“Thanks,” Alexa said, reaching out and tugging on a pocket of his apron. “It’s good to know you’re not allergic to me.”
She wasn’t ready to kiss him, but she didn’t want to totally reject him either. The man had her heart beating hard in her ears by just staring at her. She wanted the safe emotional distance between them, but she wasn’t a hypocrite.
Alexa saw Seth walk into the kitchen just in time to witness the end of their exchange. Casey gave him a deadly look.
Well, there’s the Marine, Alexa thought. She found herself intrigued with the menacing glint in Casey’s eyes and clenched jaw.
Alexa could see Seth was oblivious to both the intimacy of their conversation and Casey’s glare about being interrupted. It was easy to see why Casey was so irritated, but Alexa was glad for the reprieve.
“What made you think you were allergic to Alexa’s perfume?” Seth asked. “Maybe you need to get an allergy test. I get a newsfeed from a health site and they say allergies can be deadly.”
Seth picked up a carrot and crunched.
Casey looked at Seth with near disgust.
Alexa wanted to laugh out loud, but thought it was too impolite. She settled for sending Casey a knowing look.
Casey saw the amusement in Alexa’s gaze, and it deflated some of his anger.
“You know, Seth, there are other sources of information than the Internet. You should try paying attention to the people around you for starters,” Casey said, return to his task of viciously chopping the stack of vegetables he had been working on earlier.
“What did I say?” Seth asked, confused at Casey’s anger, looking between Casey and Alexa.
Alexa shrugged, her blue eyes twinkling with amusement. No way was she getting in the middle of two verbally sparring males.
Casey’s mouth lifted in a snarl as he continued to chop the vegetables. “Why don’t you show Alexa the patio and get her a glass of wine? I thought we’d eat outside tonight.”
Casey turned his back as they left the kitchen. Hopeless, Casey decided. Seth was just hopelessly distracted by the wrong things.
Throughout dinner, Casey tried unsuccessfully to get Seth to engage Alexa in some genuine conversation. All Seth could talk about was the latest business trends. Never once did he ask about Jenna or how she was doing. No wonder Jenna dumped him.
Casey frowned at the table, not liking proof Seth was as disconnected from reality as he feared. Though Seth did redeem himself slightly with Casey later by offering to do the dishes. When Seth had removed the last of the dishes and left for good, Alexa reached over and patted Casey on the hand.
“Come on, Marine. The mission was not a total waste,” Alexa told him.
“Mission?” Casey was surprised at first, and then resigned when he saw Alexa was grinning. “That obvious, huh?”
“The only thing obvious to me is how very proud of Seth you are. And well you should be—top of his class at Harvard? That’s pretty impressive.”
Alexa was relieved when Casey sighed and got more comfortable in his chair. She smiled at him in approval.
“Dinner was great, by the way. You really can cook,” she told Casey, lifting her wine glass.
It was very clear how much Casey loved Seth and wanted him to be happy, as any parent would want their child to be. Setting down her wine, Alexa smiled at Casey, trying to communicate a level of understanding she hoped he would find one day. Maybe the big five-o birthday had brought some wisdom after all.
“Look, have you ever considered Seth is just being the person Seth needs to be right now? He’s driven to succeed. Some would say that kind of ambition is a positive trait.”
“Not Jenna,” Casey said bitterly. “Not me—I know how short life is.”
“Well, my daughter is just as focused. She’s entering the prime of her life. Right now Jenna’s hormones are driving her every bit as hard as Seth’s ambition is driving him.” Alexa shrugged. There was little to be done about her daughter bending to mother nature. Her twenties and thirties had been just as challenging.
Casey sighed. “Would you believe Seth is actually the fun-loving one in our family?”
“No. I will never believe such a thing. You are a lot more fun,” Alexa said easily.
“It’s the truth,” Casey’s protested, even at Alexa’s choked laugh.
She leaned her elbow on the table and put her chin in her hand, “So tell me about your life, Casey Carter. I have a policy never to conspire with men I don’t know.”
Looking at her, Casey wondered if Alexa had any idea how appealing she was leaning forward to listen, all her attention focused on him. He drank a bit of wine and shifted his leg into a more comfortable position.
“For years, I was every bit as focused on the military as Seth is right now on his business. Both Seth’s parents died in a car accident when he was twelve. Susan and I were in Japan.
Both my parents were killed in a boating accident a few years before his. Seth and I ended up being only children of only children. We were the only family he had left. So Seth came to live with us.”
Casey paused his story, remembering for a moment how it had begun. “Susan and I didn’t have children of our own. For a long time, we didn’t know what to do with Seth or how to deal with him. Somehow we managed. Susan was great. We probably didn’t do much parenting, but we gave him love and support as best we could. He turned out okay in most ways.”
When Casey paused a second time, Alexa could see good memories of his wife and Seth softening his face. She felt an admiration for Casey and envy for the woman who had shared his life. She couldn’t help wondering what it was like to be loved so much.
“You and your wife did a great job, Casey. Seth is a good man, just self-absorbed, as many men tend to be at his age,” Alexa said, validating his success even as she dismissed his concerns. “What happened to your wife? Divorce?”
“Death. Cancer,” Casey answered flatly. “When we got Susan’s diagnosis, they gave her less than two years. I had severely injured my leg while on embassy duty. I was medically discharged right after we found out. Susan lasted less than six months. Cancer’s a vicious disease. Worst combat I ever engaged in and worst fight I ever lost.”
“I’m really sorry,” Alexa told him, all laughter gone. She couldn’t even imagine watching someone she loved die.
“Me too,” Casey admitted, genuinely realizing how sorry and that he hadn’t said those words before to anyone quite as honestly. He missed his wife, missed the military, and in fact missed the entire life he gave up. He knew he was still coming to terms with losing all of it in such a short period of time.
For some reason he couldn’t yet explain, receiving genuine sympathy from the woman across the table was helping tremendously in easing the pain.
There was a comfortable silence between them while they sipped their wine.
“So how about you?” Casey finally asked.
Alexa sighed and laughed at the question.
“Come on now. I’ve spilled my guts. What’s the story for Alexa Ranger? I need to know if you are friend or foe in my campaign,” Casey said, teasing.
Alexa leaned back and stretched her legs out under the patio table. Had she ever been this comfortable just talking to man? Had she ever been this interested in one?
Surprisingly, she found she wanted to tell Casey her story, which really was far more worrisome than merely wanting him sexually. It meant she liked him. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d genuinely liked a man other than Paul or Sydney.
“You want to hear about my business or the other stuff?” Alexa asked at last.
“We’ll save the business for another time,” Casey told her.
Alexa nodded, feeling a little buzz at thinking Casey really did seem interested in hearing her story. “Well, the personal and business stories are kind of linked anyway. I was a model at seventeen and did well at it. I gave up modeling a few years into it when I got pregnant at twenty-three with Jenna.”
Alexa noticed Casey’s gaze stayed on her as she talked.
“Her father and I married shortly after I discovered the pregnancy. He left me for someone else a couple months before Jenna was born. We divorced before Jenna was a year old. Sounds bad, but really it was for the best. We’ve been good parents together, but are much better friends than we ever were lovers,” Alexa assured him.
Casey nodded. “Jenna is great, too. You and her father did good work.”
“Thanks. After Jenna was born, I took some of my modeling money and opened a lingerie store. I brought Jenna to work with me everyday. It was a very good life for a single mother.”
“Did you ever marry again?” Casey asked.
“No.”
Alexa looked at him while she wondered how honest she dared be. The older she got, the less she wanted to play the “good woman” role for a man. She sighed heavily before continuing what she considered to be the crux of her life’s story.
“Throughout my twenties and my thirties, I kept looking for one man who would love me madly and who I would want in my life all the time. In my thirties, I developed quite a reputation for my search because I dated so much.”
Alexa sighed and shook back her hair. “During my most active dating period, I was an up-and-coming businesswoman often in the public’s eye. When Jenna hit her teenage years, she and I had some problems because of my dating. I was not always discreet and saw no reason why I should be. A friend sent me to see Dr. Regina Logan.”
“I think I saw her on TV once. Isn’t she a . . .” Casey hesitated as he remembered the two women he’d seen her with in the bar. It suddenly dawned on him Dr. Logan had been one of them.
“Sex therapist? Yes.” Alexa lifted her chin and met his gaze dead on. “Frankly, Regina told me I was using men to make me feel better about myself. I spat at her, yelled at her, and we’ve been friends ever since. She was right of course. I don’t think Regina is wrong very often about anything or anyone.
Alexa drained the last of her wine for courage, not looking to see if Casey was shocked or not. She decided to just spill it all to him.
“By the time I hit my forties, I was dating less. In the last few years, I haven’t cared about dating. With the exception of my ex-husband, whose company I still like, most men my age are boring to be around. I have more fun with my friends,” she concluded.
“Don’t you miss the sex?” Casey was shocked at the boldness of his own question, and relieved when Alexa only laughed. “Sorry. I meant to say—don’t you miss the companionship.”
“No, you didn’t. And yes, sometimes I miss the companionship,” Alexa admitted laughing, using his euphemism. “How about you?”
“Hell, yes,” Casey stated firmly, crossing his arms over his chest. “Susan died two years ago. I’m still trying to figure out what to do with myself. Walking is a challenge some days. My retirement is meager in this economy and I don’t have a new job yet. Up until just recently, it seemed like kind of a minor thing to worry about a lack of companionship.”
“I hear you,” Alexa told him, smiling in sympathy. “Sometimes it’s just all about timing, isn’t it? That becomes more obvious to me with every passing year.”
Casey believed Alexa Ranger really did hear him, and that she somehow understood the hurt of his life, accepted how he dealt with it, and thought well of him. His small conversation with her made him feel a hell of a lot better than the weeks of therapy he’d endured through the veteran’s center. Alexa Ranger looked at him with more approval than Casey had received from a woman in a very long time.
Alexa smiled warmly at Casey. “You seem to be a good man, Casey Carter. There are a lot of women out there looking for a good man. I have a feeling companionship is just right around the corner for you.”
“What about you? Are you still looking?” Casey asked, the question just coming out of his mouth on its own.
Instead of answering, Alexa laughed softly and got up to leave.
Casey started to stand as well, but was afraid he’d be too slow. In a panic to detain her, he reached out and grabbed her wrist, practically pulling her across the patio table. It was another reminder of when they first met. He could see in her expression it reminded her, too. This time he wasn’t letting her go without letting her know how it affected him.
Alexa tried to pull away, but Casey wouldn’t let her. She felt his firm grip on her wrist pretty much everywhere. She sighed and swore softly. She didn’t know whether to thank Casey for making her feel excitement again or run like hell from him because he was too young to be making a move on her.
She tugged her wrist trying to break free.
“No. Don’t run away this time,” Casey said, moving to stand in front of her. “Are you still looking? I would really like to know, Alexa.”
“Find a younger woman, Casey Carter. Have a happy life. I wish my daughter was interested
in you instead of your cousin,” Alexa said.
He knew better. Casey smiled wickedly and tightened his hold on her wrist. “That’s bullshit. I was married to a sexy, strong-willed woman for a long time. I can tell you want me. Can’t you tell the feeling is mutual?”
“Look, check your ego, okay? I didn’t say you weren’t great, Casey. I’m just telling you in the nicest way I can—I’m too old for you,” Alexa said sternly.
He kept his grip on her as he stood, and then Casey tugged her toward him until his nose was only inches from hers.
“If you’re too old for me, then why do I want to kiss you so badly right now it hurts to leave these few inches between us?”
Alexa hissed, annoyed with herself for underestimating Casey, or at least for underestimating their attraction. It didn’t mean it was a smart thing to indulge it, but she had seriously messed up not acknowledging it.
“Fine. I am attracted to you, but I’m not interested in pursuing it, so I’ll answer your question. No, I’m not looking any longer. Okay? I gave up looking long before you came along. Frankly, I wasn’t ever looking for a man as young as you. I don’t date younger men.”
“Too bad. I’m not buying the age difference bullshit either,” Casey said easily, letting go of her wrist. “Whatever the real reason is you’re ignoring the attraction between us, you can tell me. I know I’m not exactly in a position at the moment to be super competitive with the type of men you usually date.”
“Oh, bloody hell,” Alexa said, exasperated with Casey’s mood shifts, which were worse than her own. One minute he was humble, the next he was bossy, the next he was the nicest man she’d ever met. It was simply driving her crazy trying to keep up.
Alexa rubbed her wrist, trying to minimize the feel of his grip.
“Do not use your physical limitation as an emotional weapon with me. There are two really good reasons I’m not climbing all over you. The first is you’re related to Seth, and I do not need that kind of drama. The second is I’m twelve years older than you, and I prefer men my own age. None of my reasons have anything to do with your injury or your cane.”
Dating A Cougar Page 5
