by Carré White
“Will you marry me?”
I tried not to smile, pleased by his forthright approach. “Most men ask to court a woman first. You’ve jumped straight to the finish.”
“I’ve no need to court you to know my own mind, Saffron. I adore you. I have from the moment we met. I want nothing but your happiness, and I’m prepared to lay down my life to give it to you. I’d do whatever you want me to, if you agree to marry me.”
“Oh, gracious.”
“Is that a yes?” He looked hopeful.
“My father would want me to wait.”
“Let’s ask him then. I’ve done nothing proper yet. I haven’t even spoken to him about it, but I have a feeling he wouldn’t mind. I like your pa.”
“He likes you too.” He held my hand, while we sat together, with Silas across the other side of the fire, sleeping. “I’d marry you, if we were free. I know my mind too. I’ve been trying to deny it, but it’s been there from the start.”
He grasped my face, staring into my eyes. “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”
“Oh, Micah.”
Then, without another word, he pressed his lips to mine, gently encouraging me to respond, and I did by wrapping my arms around his neck. The sweetness of the kiss lingered, while the embrace felt safe and comforting, his lips soft and urgent. He moaned against my mouth, grasping me tighter, while my head spun with pleasure, my body delighting in the closeness, not wanting it to end.
He broke free then, breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling. “I hope we’re released tomorrow. I long to take you home.”
“I can’t wait to be your wife.”
“My thinking exactly.”
I giggled, “I shouldn’t feel this happy after everything that’s happened. Now I’m guilty.”
“We’ve every right to happiness. Weeks ago, I felt this strange pull to come to Fern Valley. After I met you, I knew. I was always supposed to find you. I’m supposed to be with you.”
“And I’ve been nothing but blind. I thought Silas was the one for me, but I ignored his flaws time and again, wanting to only see who I thought he was. Pa was right. He told me I would return from the mountains a changed woman. I don’t feel even remotely the same. It would be a shame if they killed us. I’ve only just begun to see things clearly.” I gazed at Micah. “I love you so. I can’t bear the thought of losing you now.”
He kissed my cheek. “You won’t. I’ve done my diplomatic best to explain everything to To-Quo-Ne. I saw him enter the chief’s hut a while ago. He’s still in there. I’m certain he’s imparting everything I said to him. Believe it or not, these people are reasonable. They’re discussing things in detail, and they shall make the right decision. Whatever it is, good or bad, we’ll have to honor it.”
This might be our last night alive. “I feel helpless.”
“It’s not ideal,” he admitted grimly. “We have these few hours.” He kissed my hand. “I’m grateful to be here with you. If this is all I’m given, I won’t waste it.”
“Me either.”
We sat together, while the fire crackled and popped and Indians came and went casting interested looks in our direction. It was rather obvious we were being watched, and, although I longed for freedom, I knew trying to escape would be suicide. A short while later, after To-Quo-Ne emerged from the chief’s hut, we were escorted to a wickiup, which sat in the middle of camp. Another family, who took a hut further out, had vacated it. It was clear they wanted to keep an eye on us, not trusting we would not try to escape. There was a fire here and a buffalo hide on the floor with the pelt of some animal nearby for a blanket.
We encouraged Silas to stand and walk, although he groaned in pain. He had cursed up a blue streak, shuffling through camp angrily. He quieted after being helped into the wickiup, falling asleep within moments. I sat by the fire with Micah, sharing an urn of water and talking about our plans for the future, but would there even be a future?
“Then you wouldn’t be adverse to farming?” I asked.
“No.”
“Won’t you miss the freedom of being a trapper?”
“Not at all. I’ve done it long enough.”
A baby cried in the distance, the sound echoing. “Pa would help us build a house. I don’t expect anything as fine as what we have now, but something small would work. Ma came from money. Most of that is spent now, though.”
“I’ve some savings from trapping. When beaver-pelt hats were all the rage in Europe, I was paid five dollars per pound of pelt. I caught more than my fair share to amass a tidy nest egg. I never wasted money on gambling and drink, which could wipe out an entire season of work. I watched too many good men fall into that mistake.”
“I see. Maybe we can get a settler’s claim for some land and build a farm.”
“We can do whatever you want, Saffron. We can go east or west or south. It doesn’t matter to me.” His warm gaze drifted over my face.
“I’d like to stay near family. I’ve a love for this land as well, although it’s dangerous. I can’t imagine leaving.”
“Then we won’t. We’ll stay put.”
“Are you always this agreeable about everything?” I scooted nearer to him, admiring the curve of his chin, although darkened hair covered the skin there. “You’re not just humoring me, are you?”
“A happy wife is a happy life, and I’ll do anything to make you happy.”
“What do you want? It’s not just about me.”
“I can live anywhere. I know these mountains like the back of my hand. I know the people. I feel at home here. I belong here. I’ve done enough traveling in my wagon train years, so I’ve satisfied that need. I’ve been to California. I’ve seen the ocean. It’s beautiful too, but nothing could ever compare to the beauty and adventure of these mountains.”
“Then that’s settled.”
“We stay in Fern Valley?”
“Yes, please.”
He kissed my forehead. “So be it.”
I yawned, feeling the weight of everything that had happened today, while willing some of the images away. I could not think about all that was lost, or else I would not sleep tonight. It had been an ordeal to overcome, and it was far from over. Tomorrow we would know our fate, but tonight … was ours.
“Let’s go to bed.” He nuzzled my neck, whispering, “You’ll be in my arms tonight. I want to spend every last second with you.”
“I hope this isn’t the end, Micah, but if it is, at least we’re together.”
He got to his feet, pulling me up alongside him. “It’s not the end. Have more faith.” He led me to the wickiup, waiting for me to enter first. “He’s out cold.”
Silas snored on his back. “Yes, he is. I’m worried about him. That wound needs to be seen to.”
“Hopefully, we’ll be home tomorrow. Dr. Walker can take care of him.”
I sat on a pelt, pressing my hands together, saying, “Lord, please watch over us in our time of need. Please let Chief Quarat see the wisdom of letting us go. Please spare us, so our families don’t have to suffer. Look over those who have perished and lead them to your grace. Heal Silas, please. Let him be healthy enough to walk home tomorrow. Amen.”
“Amen,” murmured Micah, lifting the edge of the pelt. “It’ll be warmer tonight.”
I snuggled into his chest, as his arms went around me. “It is.”
He kissed my forehead. “Sleep well, Saffron.”
“I believe I will. This is very comfortable.”
Our body heat remained trapped beneath the fur, warming me thoroughly. I closed my eyes, as images flickered and went, dreaming of the walk home in sunlight, the feeling of freedom infusing each step. Micah murmured something in Ute, sighing deeply, his chest rising and falling. It wasn’t long before we were fast asleep.
Someone’s ragged cough woke me, and I worried about Silas. I sat up, glancing at him. Micah had already risen, because he was nowhere to be seen. “Silas?”
“Hum?”<
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“How are you?”
“Terrible.”
I crawled over to him. “I should have a look at that wound.”
“Be my guest,” he muttered.
Lifting his shirt, I examined the bandage, finding dried blood. Untying the strips of cloth, I stared at the stitches, noting it had stopped bleeding and the edges looked pink. “This is promising. I don’t see infection. You’re not swollen in the least.”
“But my gut hurts. You’ve no idea what’s happening in there. It could’ve ruptured something important like my pancreas or spleen.”
“It’s lower than that. It might be your small intestine. You’d have to see Dr. Walker to find out more. The arrow pierced through all of that. I just hope your body finds a way to recover.”
“Or Micah’s digging did more damage than good. He should’ve just left the darn thing in there.”
“You should be more grateful he helped you. You have yet to thank him. He did a fine job yesterday. Just ask Doc Walker when you see him. He’ll tell you he did everything right. If he had left the arrow inside, it would’ve abscessed and killed you.” He grabbed my wrist, squeezing it painfully. “Ouch.”
“You think I don’t know what’s happening, don’t you? I know plenty. I’ve heard plenty. You’re in love with him, eh? You think you’re going to marry him? Why on earth would you set your sights so low, Saffron? That man can’t offer you a thing. He’s not worthy of your consideration. I could’ve given you the world.”
“I thought you were the one for me, but I’ve changed my mind. You’ll make some other woman happy.” Or miserable. “I don’t care what you think of Micah or me. I love that man. He’s proven himself to be trustworthy and able and someone I respect enormously. I’m proud to be with him. I’m quite eager to marry him.”
“I was going to ask you to marry me. I’ve been waiting on the engagement ring to arrive. I’ve a jeweler in Boston making it.” Pain flared in his look, his eyes watering, and it had nothing to do with his aching belly. “I do love you, Saffron. I’ve been terrible at showing it, but I do.”
I hadn’t known this. “Oh.”
“You were grieving. I waited patiently the entire year, and it was all for naught. You’ve run off with a mountain man.”
“I’m certain you’ll find another woman to give the ring to. I’m sorry, Silas. I’m just not in love with you. I can’t lie about something as important as this. In a few months, you’ll agree with me. You’ll see I was right. I’ve saved us both from making an enormous mistake.”
“Are you going to leave me here?”
My eyes flew wide. “What?”
“I’ve been a bit of a heel. I know you’re not pleased with me. Are you and Micah going to leave me with the blasted Indians?”
“No.” How could he even think such a thing?
“I’m wounded. I can barely walk. If I were in your shoes, I’d leave me.”
“We will not. You’ll come with us, as soon as they say we can go. I’d never abandon you like that. I’m sorry you’d do the same for me. I suggest you speak to Pastor Boyd about these feelings. If you survive this, you might want to try to be a better human being.”
He stared at me, his look morose. “I see. I see how you really feel.”
“I’ve every hope you shall be a better man. Money is of little value, if the soul is wanting, but you can still be saved.” I touched his face, moving aside a strand of blonde hair. “You can be charming and playful and enchanting to be around. You’ve many good qualities, Silas.”
“Don’t try to appease me. You find me lacking. I’ll think about what you’ve said. I do own to my mistakes, and I’ve made quite a few. I’m not a perfect person.”
“Nor am I. We’re only doing the best we can.”
“Thank you for helping me, Saffron. You’ve been kinder to me than I deserve. I’ll thank Micah too when I see him.”
“You’ll be able to walk.” I took his hand, giving it a squeeze. “Can I get you something to drink? You need water. You need to eat.”
Something flickered in his eyes, as wetness appeared. “Yes, thank you, but don’t trouble yourself too much.” He struggled to sit, moaning. “Ugh. That hurts.” A determined look came over him then, when he realized he could sit easily. “You know, you may be right. I just might be well enough to walk today. Let’s hope those scoundrels let us go.”
I nodded. “Indeed.”
Micah appeared, peeking into the hut. “They’ve decided what to do with us.”
“Oh, my word.” I was about to learn my fate.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Micah reached for Silas, helping him to stand. “How are you?”
“I’m as fair as can be expected, but I can walk!” He grinned. “It might not be such a bad day after all.” He patted Micah on the back. “Thank you for dragging my sorry self along. Thank you for the effort.” He glanced my way. “Saffron says you’re to be married.”
Surprise lit Micah’s eyes. “Yes. As soon as we get out of here.”
“Well, isn’t that just swell?” He hid his disappointment poorly. “You may have the reception at my hotel, if you wish. I’d be happy to host it.” Silas faked his joviality for our sake, but I sensed his pain nonetheless.
“That’s kind of you to offer.”
“Do you know anything?” I asked. “Did you overhear what they said?” Hope flared within me, and now that Silas could walk, our chances of surviving had just increased.
“No, but we’re wanted at the chief’s hut. They’ll tell us there. We should go.”
“All right.” I left the wickiup, finding a brave waiting. “We’ve an escort, I see.” Should this concern me? I knew we had been watched all evening, but no one stood guard outside.
“And a bright morning it is,” quipped Silas, squinting into the sunlight, which streamed down through the branches of a ponderosa pine.
I wanted to feel optimistic, but a little voice had begun to niggle me unpleasantly, poking at me like a pinch of salt in a wound. We followed the brave to Chief Quarat’s hut, where several Indians had gathered, including Daisy, who stood with her son in her arms.
“Hello.” I glanced at her, but she failed to smile. “Do you know what they will do?” She said nothing, lowering her gaze to stare at the ground.
Several older, stoic-looking Utes sat inside the dwelling, the chief being the one in the elaborate headdress. We stood before him, while he puffed on a pipe, the smoke filling the air with a pungent scent. He began to speak, uttering his words calmly and with conviction. I watched Micah, trying to guess if the news was good or bad, but he remained impassive. The only hint that something was amiss was the tiny tick in his cheek.
When the speech had concluded, we were dismissed, and I stood outside the hut with Silas, who stared at Micah. “What was that drivel about? Did the old man let us go or are we to be fed to the dogs?”
I grasped Micah’s arm. “What is it? What’s going to happen?”
He sighed, closing his eyes. “They are going to let us go.”
Happiness left me nearly faint with relief. “Oh, thank goodness!” I went to hug him, but he pushed me away gently.
“Not so fast.” He looked grim, his mouth forming a thin line. “We are free, if we can swim.”
“What?”
“They’re unhappy that we’ve encroached on their lands. They truly wanted to kill us for being here. My pleasant, friendly entreaties did not matter in the least. They want to make an example of us. If we can swim, then we’re free to go. That’s all I know.”
“Swim?” I was able to do so, but which body of water would we have to prove ourselves in? “It might not be all that bad. I can manage.”
“I somehow don’t think it’ll be so easy, but we must not lose faith.” He touched my face. “You’ve a courageous soul, Saffron. You’ll have to be even more fearless now.”
“Oh, dear. That doesn’t sound all that good.”
We were not allow
ed to discuss the situation further, as several braves came to take us away. I glimpsed Daisy at a distance, knowing I would never see her again. She stood with her husband and child, her look bleak, and I sensed she knew what we did not—the truth of our condition. Even if I perished today, at least my friend had lived and thrived, finding acceptance among these enduring, yet frightening people.
Remarkably enough, Silas fell into the lead, followed by an Indian, whose hair hung down his back in two braids. We walked single-file towards a path that led upwards, the freshness of the morning air filling my lungs. If I hadn’t been so terrified about where we were going, I would have appreciated the view from here, where dozens of wickiups spotted the landscape. From the activity below, it appeared as if the tribe had begun to dismantle them, people wandering back and forth to accomplish this task.
“They’re leaving.” I pointed.
Micah nodded. “Yes. They know we’ll tell the authorities of the atrocities that have occurred here.” He pursed his lips. “If we live long enough to do so.”
“Then the cavalry will hunt them down.”
“Yes, or not. If they run, they might escape.”
Anger raced through me. “We’ve done nothing wrong! We came to kill a bear, not steal lands. They ambushed us and murdered nearly everyone in our group. I’m glad they’ve taken such good care of Daisy, but I really dislike these people.”
“You have to understand the oppression they’ve suffered. Their lands have been stolen, treaties are continually broken, and they distrust us. Anger won’t help you, Saffron. You need to focus on what you can do to survive.”
“That’s all I’ve been thinking about since the avalanche. We were lucky to come out with barely a scratch.”
“And perhaps our luck will continue.”
I cast him a dubious glance, my resolve to remain optimistic crumbling. This ordeal had taken every bit of energy and mental strength I possessed, and, although I had fallen in love on this journey, I could not even rejoice in that miracle. Instead, I feared again for my life and those I loved.