by Jenna Byrnes
“I know. You did what you had to do. All of us understood that. But I think Cheryl feels guilty, too.”
“Why should she? My god, she did everything for that kid. She couldn’t have done any more.”
Steven touched Tim’s arm. “And he still died.”
Tim curled up his fist and pounded the table. Their mugs and pitcher jumped, but nothing spilled.
The waitress headed in their direction, but Steven waved her off. “Have you and Cheryl been able to talk about this at all?”
“No.” Tim shook his head, his face flushed red. Tears brimmed in his eyes but didn’t flow.
“Maybe it would help both of you to talk about how you feel. Losing a kid is a hell of a thing.”
“She asked if I wanted to go see someone, a therapist or someone like that, but I brushed her off. Didn’t think we needed it.”
“What do you think now?” Steven asked gently.
Tim swiped the back of his arm across his face. “Might not be a bad idea.” He drained his glass, refilled it and topped off Steven’s beer. “So why did you come see me today? I get the feeling there was more than Cheryl and me on your mind.”
“Aw, shit.” Steven ripped his paper napkin to shreds. It’d felt good putting his problems aside for a moment and not so good dredging them up again. “I don’t know what the hell to do.”
“What?” Tim nudged his arm. “Mustang or Ferrari?”
“Jaguar,” Steven smiled wryly. “Paul picked it out for me. He said it was for me, anyway.”
“Paul, eh?” Tim grinned. “So what’s up with you and Paul? You know I think he’s a really great guy.”
“Yeah, I think so, too. I guess. I mean, the timing really sucks. We start a relationship the day I show him my winning lottery ticket.”
“Oh.” The reality of the situation seemed to dawn on Tim. “Gotcha. You think he’s more interested in your money than your charm and good looks?”
“I suspect I got a lot better looking and more charming when the ninety-seven million dollars arrived.”
“Hmm,” Tim grimaced. “I wouldn’t be so sure of that. I’ve always gotten the impression Paul’s pretty well set himself. He drives a nice car.”
“And lives in a nice condo, I know. I also know he has a stack of bills sitting right on top of his desk, like he’s been going over them recently. They add up to more money than I made last year. The last three years, probably.”
“Oh yeah? That’s tough.” Tim polished off the pitcher and flagged the waitress for another.
“You don’t sound too concerned about it. What am I missing?”
Tim shrugged. “You like the guy?”
Steven’s heart lurched. Oh yeah. “That’s not the point.”
“I wasn’t making a point, yet. I asked if you like the guy.”
Truth? “‘Like’ is an understatement.”
Tim nodded. “You think he cares about you? Money aside, how do you really think he feels about you?”
“That’s just it. I can’t put the money aside. I don’t know how.”
The waitress brought a full pitcher, and Tim poured another round. He sat for a moment, squirmed uncomfortably in his seat and finally said, “I don’t want to get too personal, and for god’s sake, I don’t want details. But when you’re together, and he looks at you—how do you think he feels?”
Steven thought back to the shower with Paul. The look in his lover’s eyes after Steven had just sucked him to completion… He smiled. “The same way I do.”
Tim slapped a hand on the table. “Okay. So if the two of you had been dating before you won the money, and he had all these bills, would you have hesitated to pay them off?”
“Of course not. But—”
“But…what’s more important to you, little brother, love or money? Say you pay his bills. It’s a drop in the bucket to you. But it makes him happy.” Tim’s words slurred as his beer consumption increased. “You know the saying, ‘When Mama’s happy, everyone’s happy’.” A strange expression crossed his face. “How does that work with two gay guys?”
Steven laughed. “Not sure you’ve had enough beer, or possibly you’ve had too much, to figure that one out. But here’s my problem. What if I pay his bills, everyone’s happy and next thing I know, he takes off? Wham, bam, thank you ma’am.”
Tim nodded thoughtfully. “It’s a possibility. I think you’re going to have to search your heart. Decide if you’re willing to take the gamble or not.”
A fuzzy tingle settled in Steven’s stomach. He looked at the bottom of his empty mug, wondering if it were the beer or something stronger causing the feeling. “I’ve been known to take a gamble now and again. It’s just…” His hand started to shake, and he set the glass down. “If he did that, I’m not sure I could trust anyone again.”
Tim put a hand on the back of Steven’s neck and squeezed. “Look at it this way, Stevie.” He refilled both their steins and lifted his, gazing at Steven over the top of his glass. “At least you’ll be able to sit. Paul won’t even want to think about it after I’ve kicked his ass to Springfield and back.”
Steven laughed and raised his mug. “Thanks, bro.”
Tim grinned. “Shall we order another pitcher?”
Regardless of what happened in the future, Steven realised what he had right there was something special. Something I should be grateful for. He had so many things to be grateful for. “Why not?” He smiled. “I’m buying.”
* * * *
Steven rode the lift up to Paul’s floor with a neighbour so he didn’t have to announce himself. He rang the bell and tried to keep his breathing calm while he waited for the door to open.
When Paul didn’t answer, Steven’s second thoughts kicked in. He ran a hand through his messier-than-usual hair. He’d barely slept, and while this had seemed like a good idea earlier… He turned around to leave just as Paul answered.
“What are you doing here?” Paul looked worse than Steven felt. He looked like he’d slept in his suit from the day before, if he’d slept at all. The dishevelled hair and unshaven chin didn’t suit him.
“I, uh, wanted to talk to you.” Steven caught his eye. “Needed to see you.”
Paul waved a hand in the air. “So, look at me. Here I am. Now, you’ll have to excuse me. My last gold-digging gig fell through, and I’m scouring the adverts for my next easy ride.”
“Paul, listen. Can we talk, please?”
Unmoving, Paul stared at him.
“Inside?” Steven tried to convey a confidence he didn’t feel.
Paul stepped aside and motioned him in. “Whatever. If there’s anything left to say.”
“I think there is.” Steven entered the condo and closed the door behind him. “Look, I’m sorry about what I said. This whole lottery-winner thing has turned my life upside down, and I’m not handling it very well. All of a sudden, it seems like everyone wants something from me.”
“Of course they do, you fucking idiot! My phone’s been ringing off the hook since I made those calls yesterday. You need to set up a trust, or a foundation, and start filtering people through there. Otherwise, you’ll never have a moment’s peace.”
“I know,” Steven admitted. “The voicemail on my phone is full. I haven’t listened to any of it.”
Paul folded his arms across his chest. “Good thing I didn’t try to call.”
Steven caught his eye. “I wish you had.”
“Why? You never checked your messages.”
“Christ.” Steven held his head in his hands. “You know why I didn’t. Don’t do this to me. I’m here to tell you I need you, Paul.”
The accountant waved him off. “You don’t need me. I told you to call Goodrich. He can fix you right up.”
Steven pressed Paul’s shoulders up against the door. “I know what you told me. You said Goodrich is gay, but I’m not sure he’s my type. You’re my type, babe. I’ve already got that figured out.”
“Oh, now, wait a minute. Yesterday
you accused me of going after you for your money. You think you can waltz in here and say you’re sorry and everything’s back to normal?”
He nuzzled his face against Paul’s ear. “I thought so, yeah.”
Paul squirmed against the door but didn’t push him away. “You’re a jerk, you know that?”
“Honestly, I’m just trying to go into this thing with my eyes open. You told me yourself, it’s hard to know whom to trust. I thought about this all night long. I want to trust you, Paul. I want to believe that what happened between us would have happened anyway, with or without the lottery ticket.”
Paul cupped Steven’s chin. “It would have. I said I flipped for you the moment we met, and I meant it. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”
“Neither have I. That’s why I had to come back. I’m not sure what the future holds for us, babe, but I have a few thoughts about it. And I know I’d like to make things work with you.” He pressed his lips against Paul’s.
Paul pulled back. “I have a confession. Those bills you saw—they were a client’s, not mine.”
Steven nodded. “When I really thought about it, I wondered if that might be the case. In fact, I—”
The downstairs intercom buzzed, and Paul slapped at the box. “Go away.”
Steven smiled and pushed the button again. “Come on up.”
“What are you doing?” Paul’s hands roamed his chest and shoulders. “I don’t want to see anybody. I want to crawl inside you and never come out.”
“Soon.” Steven kissed him one more time. “There’s one more thing I need to take care of.” He tugged Paul away from the door and opened it.
Tim and Cheryl got off the elevator. Tim looked as rumpled and sleep-deprived as the other men did, and she looked pissed as hell. It looked like she’d been ragging on him for hours.
“What are we doing here?” she muttered to her husband angrily. “First you stay out all night drinking, and now you drag me downtown without so much as an explanation.”
Steven took her arm and led her into the condo. “Cheryl, relax. You’re here because Tim and I have something we want to tell you. You know Paul Aspen.”
“Yes, sure.” She tugged her arm away and rubbed it, seeming embarrassed.
“Hello.” Paul appeared just as surprised to see her and unsure of what to say.
“Let me cut right to the chase,” Steven told them. “My brother and I had a long talk last night. A thought-provoking, amazing talk.”
“I think there was a massive amount of beer consumed,” she scoffed to Paul.
“Oh, yeah, there was at that.” Steven grinned. He waved his hands in the air. “But it helped us clear the air and figure some things out. The most important thing is—Paul, I want to be with you.”
Paul scrubbed a hand over his face. “Well, yeah. I want that, too. But only if you can be sure we’re in this for the right reasons.”
“I guess you can say I’m taking a little leap of faith on that. And I want you to take the leap with me. I want to start a foundation with my money. A certain amount of each annual payment will go into the fund, and people will have to apply for donations. It’s going to involve some work, and I’ll need someone I can trust to set it up and run it. I realised last night that was you.”
“So you do trust me.” A smile lit Paul’s face. “I would love that job. But it’s going to be a strictly salaried position, and the books will be open to inspection by anyone at any time.”
“We’ll work out the details later. But there’s one other thing. Weeding out potential beneficiaries is going to be a big job. I’d like to bring in some help. Cheryl, would you agree to co-chair the foundation with Paul? I think you could bring a valuable perspective to the process.”
“Me?” She blinked in obvious surprise.
“You’d be perfect for the job.” Tim kissed her temple.
“I-I don’t know…”
Steven touched her hand. “Tim and I tossed this around last night. What do you think of naming it The Matthew DeLong Foundation?”
“Oh, Stevie!” She squeezed his neck.
He felt her tears flowing. He hugged her then eased her away. “So, what do you think?”
Cheryl threw her arms around her husband. “I think that’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard. And yes, I would love to co-chair the foundation.”
Tim smiled at his brother over his wife’s head.
Steven grinned and turned to Paul. “Does that work for you?” He was surprised to see a single tear brimming in the other man’s eye.
“Hell yes, it works for me.” Paul scooped him into a hug. “I think it’s a fucking fantastic idea.”
Steven grinned again and murmured in his ear, “You have a filthy mouth.”
Paul chuckled and whispered back, “Ooh, baby. I’m just getting started.”
Tim spoke loud enough for all of them to hear. “No one ever asked what Stevie and I will be doing while the two of you are running the foundation.”
“What?” Cheryl asked, smiling and out of breath.
“We’re going to design and build a house.” Steven looked from them to Paul. “Maybe something with a nice view of the lake. I haven’t gotten the details figured out yet. I’m just starting to decide what I want.”
“Is that so?” Paul nodded with approval.
“Oh, yeah.” Steven grasped his lover’s belt and pulled him close. “First things first, of course.”
Paul grinned. The look in his eye was exactly as Steven remembered it the morning before, full of love, lust and brimming with hope for the future.
Tim wrapped an arm around Cheryl. “We’re going to take off. We have a lot to talk about. Finding a therapist we both like, the foundation and Mattie.” He looked at his wife. “I’d really like to talk about Mattie.”
She snuggled next to him. “Let’s go home.”
They waved at Steven and Paul and walked out, still clinging to each other.
“See you later.” Steven closed the door behind them. He turned to face Paul. “I think they’re going to be okay. Talking is good. It’s the first step.”
Paul smiled. “You’re right. Want to know something? I don’t feel like talking at all.” He extended a hand.
Steven waggled his eyebrows. His heart pounded, and the beginnings of an erection formed in his jeans. “Got something better in mind?” He clasped the hand and let Paul drag him down the hall.
“Many, many, time consuming things. All these plans you’ve been making? I hope they don’t start until later.”
They tumbled onto the bed and grinned at each other.
“Much later,” Steve agreed, and they kissed.
About the Author
Jenna Byrnes could use more cabinet space and more hours in a day. She’d fill the kitchen with gadgets her husband purchases off TV and let him cook for her to his heart’s content. She’d breeze through the days adding hours of sleep, and more time for writing the hot, erotic romance she loves to read.
Jenna thinks everyone deserves a happy ending, and loves to provide as many of those as possible to her gay, lesbian and hetero characters. Her favourite quote, from a pro-gay billboard, is “Be careful who you hate. It may be someone you love.”
Email: [email protected]
Jenna Byrnes loves to hear from readers. You can find her contact information, website and author biography at http:www.total-e-bound.com
Also by Jenna Byrnes
Unexpected Love: Nothing to Lose
Unexpected Love: Worth the Risk
Unexpected Love: Having It All
Rose & Thorn Society: Switching Seth
Rose & Thorn Society: Never Say Never
Cattle Valley: Truth or Dare
Cattle Valley: Fool’s Gold
Convincing Cate
Second Time Around
Carnal Collision
Taking Control
Secret Santa
My Secret Valentine: Secret Rendezvous
Night Shift
Also by Jenna Byrnes and Jude Mason
Untamed Hearts: Feral Heat
Untamed Hearts: Bear Combustion
Untamed Hearts: Wolfen Choice
Kindred Spirits: Ethan’s Choice
Kindred Spirits: Hunter’s Light
Friction: Maximum Exposure
Over the Moon: Trapped
Gaymes: Good Cop, Bad Cop
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