by Sophie Stern
She brings a certain grace to the ranch. She handles a lot of the basic day-to-day operations on the ranch, but it’s more than that. She’s a darling. She loves Wyatt and his family and the whole staff. Her happiness radiates constantly and when Hope is involved, she makes everything just a little bit brighter.
“Just sandwiches,” she says. She’s wearing her son, whom I consider to be my nephew, in a baby carrier on her back and he laughs and makes noises as she moves throughout the room.
“How can I help?”
Hope raises an eyebrow.
“You feeling okay, hon?” She asks.
“Why wouldn’t I be feeling okay?”
“You never ask to help.”
“Maybe I’m turning over a new leaf,” I say, and shrug.
“Is everything okay?” Hope asks. She actually looks concerned, and for a second I think about pouring my royal heart out to her. Wouldn’t that be great? I can’t talk to Selena about my feelings, but I could talk to Hope? That doesn’t make any sense, only in some weird, twisted way, it does.
Hope is a neutral party.
I didn’t grow up with her and she doesn’t know about my history in Honeypot. She doesn’t about my life before she came here. She doesn’t know that I’ve never had a successful serious relationship and I’m scared of having one now.
I’m scared I’m not man enough for Selena.
I’m scared I’m going to mess it all up.
“It’s fine,” I say, and start to set the table. Soon the other ranch hands will be in to enjoy some good food and good company and I’m just over here, counting down the minutes until my girl comes over and makes my day a little bit brighter.
Chapter 3
Selena
“Are you doing anything this weekend?” Savannah asks.
“Why do you ask?”
“Just curious,” she takes a sip of her water and I put my hands on my hips.
“Nice try,” I say. “I’ve known you longer than you’ve known yourself.”
“That’s literally a lie.”
“What do you want?”
She sighs and sets her drink down. Savannah never gets nervous and she doesn’t hold back, at least when it comes to me. Why is she being weird now?
“Carter and I want to get away this weekend,” she says. “There aren’t any reservations for guests at the ranch, so it’s a great chance for us to go get some alone time.” Wyatt, Carter, and Micah have a small tourism business in conjunction with their ranch. They rent out cabins on their property where shifter families can come and stay.
“Why aren’t there any reservations? That seems a bit strange. Haven’t they been booked solid since they opened?”
“Well,” Savannah looks sheepish. “They may have blacked out this weekend so we could all have a vacation.”
If someone needs to get away from the city or they just need a break from their real life, they can simply stay in one of the little cabins and have some time to themselves. Honestly, I’ve thought about renting one myself and just sleeping for a week straight. There’s electricity, so I could still eat and have hot showers, but no one would bother me.
No one would talk to me.
No one would need anything.
Alex actually lives in one of the cabins, but his is fully decked out with video games and books and a huge DVD collection. Micah and his mate, Evelyn, lived in one for awhile, but just bought their own house. Now it’s just Alex and the elderly Blairs: Wyatt, Carter, and Micah’s parents.
“Where are you guys going to go?” I ask.
“Nellenston,” she says quickly. “We’re going to this event on Dragon Isle.”
“Oh?” I raise my eyebrow. Dragon Isle is well known for its kinky events. Oh, my sweet sister might come across as a little darling, but if she and Carter are going to Dragon Isle, they’re going to be playing with whips and chains.
That brings up a question.
“Wait,” I say. “What about Colby?”
Colby is Carter’s biological son and Savannah’s adopted son. She may not have given birth to the kid, but Savannah is his mommy through-and-through. She’s completely amazing with him and I know she can’t imagine her life without him in it.
“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” Savannah says. She takes a bite of her bacon and my stomach growls. Lately, all I’ve wanted to do is eat, but at the same time, I can’t stomach the idea of food. Seriously, whoever came up with the term “morning sickness” is an idiot.
I feel sick throughout the day and I’m up half the night being sick. I’m going to have to tell Alex about the baby soon or he’s going to stop hanging out with me because he’ll be afraid of catching the flu.
“No,” I say. She’s going to ask me to babysit. I can’t. I just can’t. Me and kids? Yeah, I’m not good at kids. This is why I’m terrified of the whole “mom” thing. It’s not that I think Alex is going to freak out. Well, that’s not entirely true. I’m still worried he’ll freak out, but he’s probably going to have an easier time than me, honestly.
But I’ve never really been around kids aside from Savannah’s, and I’m not convinced that I’ll be able good at it at all.
I mean, what would I even say to Colby all weekend? What would we talk about? I couldn’t tell him about my job or talk about politics. I couldn’t discuss the best way to host a dinner party or explain how to make a great pot of coffee.
What would we talk about?
And aside from that, what would we do?
I don’t know anything about crafts. I don’t know anything about games kids like to play. I’m clueless. I’m completely, utterly clueless.
The real fear, though, is that I’ll mess up when it comes to keeping him safe. I don’t want to let anything happen to Colby. He’s Savannah’s pride and joy. She loves the hell out of that kid.
And me?
I’m so messed up, there’s no way.
There’s no way I’m going to be able to take care of one.
“You haven’t even heard me out,” Savannah whines.
“I don’t need to. You know how I feel about kids.”
She rolls her eyes and crosses her arms over her chest. When she does that, she looks like our grandmother. Grams was always looking disappointed at us. It didn’t matter what we did, she somehow managed to make it seem like we’d let her down. Savannah and I both loved Grams dearly. She took us in after our parents died and raised us like her own, but right now, the look on Savannah’s face reminds me of being in trouble.
It also sort of makes me want to slap her.
“Let me guess,” Savannah says. “You’re afraid you’re going to break him, hurt him, or forget to feed him. Is that about right?”
Somehow, when she says it like that, I feel a bit silly.
“Basically,” I mumble.
The diner is empty and I’m glad. If she had tried to ask me these questions in front of other people, I might just die. I don’t want to deal with the fact that I suck as a person in front of Savannah, but I definitely don’t want to do it with other shifters around. Our hearing is so great that even if someone whispers, it’s like they’re speaking normally.
There’s no such thing as a secret in a shifter town.
At least not one that last for long, I think, trying not to rub my belly. It’s become a nervous habit and sooner or later, someone is going to realize why I can’t keep my hands off myself.
“Look,” Savannah softens her voice and reaches for my hands. She takes them in hers and rubs her fingers over my skin. “You can do this,” she encourages me. “It’s not a big deal. It’s only Friday to Sunday. That’s only two nights and two full days. You’ve got this.”
“What if I mess it up?” I ask. “What then? What would Carter do?”
“You let me worry about my mate,” Savannah says. “And I think you’re forgetting that Colby is six now. He’s a big kid. He’ll tell you what he needs. You aren’t going to be guessing about what he wants
the way you would with a baby.”
Baby.
That reminds me of Hope and Wyatt and baby Josiah. Why aren’t they watching Colby?
“Why can’t Wyatt do it?” I ask. “Or Micah?”
“They all have plans this weekend,” she says. “It’s one of the only weekends we don’t have guests, so we’re all trying to take advantage of it. Micah and Evelyn are coming with us to Nellenston. Hope and Wyatt are flying to the beach for a couple of days, and the senior Blairs are going to meet up with some friends they met during their world tour.”
“So it’s up to me,” I say glumly.
Savannah pats me on the hand once more and I wish she would just quit. She’s treating me like I’m the one who’s the little kid.
“Stop,” I say.
“Please,” she says, blinking her eyes at me.
“No!”
“Please,” she repeats, fluttering her eyelashes more severely.
Then I realize that this is Savannah, and she would do anything for me. If I was the one with the mate and the kid, she’d take care of my child in a heartbeat so I could have alone time. If I was the one who needed a break, she’d be right there. If I was the one who needed to go relax, she would immediately be by my side helping me.
Savannah would do anything for me.
Don’t I owe her the same courtesy?
I might be scared, but this is Savannah. This is my girl. This is my sister. She’s coming to me and she needs me and this really is such a simple thing. I can do this for her. I’m scared out of my damn mind, but I can do this. She believes in me. Shouldn’t I believe in myself?
“Okay,” I finally say. “I’ll do it.”
“Eek!” She screams and starts jumping up and down, and I can’t help but laugh. She looks adorable and insane at the same time, and I know it’s what I look like when I get overexcited, too.
“It’ll be fine,” I say out loud, but I’m trying to convince myself. Savannah obviously believes in me, and I have to give her kudos for that. I don’t know if I could leave my kid for a weekend. I press my hand to my stomach and close my eyes for a second.
My kid.
I’m going to have a kid.
I’m going to be a mother.
I’m growing a baby.
Suddenly, the room starts spinning and I grab the counter to steady myself.
“Hey,” Savannah says, snapping her finger in front of my face. “Are you okay, hon?”
“Yeah,” I lie. “I’m fine.”
Just fine.
Chapter 4
Alex
Selena arrives right on time and I don’t even wait for her to knock on the door. There’s no time for patience tonight. I need to hold her. I need to be inside of her. I need to touch her.
I need to fucking smell her.
As soon as I hear her car door slam, I open the door to my cabin. She walks across the yard from the small parking area and walks up the steps to the porch. The jeans she’s wearing hug every curve of her hips and when she walks like this, she’s all woman. She’s a complete seductress and I’m caught in her web.
The problem is that I don’t care. I like being caught. I like being with her in this trap. I like being Selena’s and I like knowing she’s mine.
Only, she’s not really mine. Not really. Not yet.
All of that’s about to change, though.
She doesn’t know I’m going to ask her to marry me. She doesn’t know I can’t live without her and I don’t plan on doing it for much longer. There’s no way to tell if she’ll respond favorably or not. Selena is perfect in my eyes, but she’s also scared. I don’t blame her for a damn minute. Her life hasn’t been easy.
She and Savannah lost their parents at a young age. I’ve known them long enough to know they don’t like to talk about it, don’t like to think about it, and certainly don’t want to go through anything like that again.
I’d probably feel the same way, if it was me.
Now I have to show her that I’m not going to leave her. I’m not going to abandon her. It sounds weird, maybe. It sounds crazy, but I think there’s part of Selena’s heart that feels her parents really did let her down. They shouldn’t have died. It wasn’t fair to her or Savannah or anyone. They shouldn’t have been in that car and they shouldn’t have crashed. They shouldn’t have passed away.
They should have been there for her.
Their grandmother did the best she could raising those girls, but sometimes your best just isn’t enough. When a kid loses her parents, she never really gets over that. You can love the hell out of her, but she’ll always mourn them.
I think Selena often felt scared and isolated. She had Savannah, but none of her other friends could understand what they were going through.
Even now, as a young woman, many people look at Selena with pity and I think she sort of hates it.
Maybe that’s why she likes me.
Maybe she likes being treated like she’s worth more than her past, worth more than her history. Maybe she likes being treated with a little bit of respect. Maybe she likes knowing that when I look at her, all I see is a gorgeous fucking woman.
I don’t see ghosts when I look at Selena, and a lot of people in this town do.
“You look beautiful,” I tell her.
“Thanks,” she blushes. “I just got off work, actually. Is it okay if I take a quick shower?”
“Had to close up tonight?” I ask.
“Yeah, but not alone. Penguin was there to help me. It was her first time closing, so I had to show her the ropes.”
“Penguin?” I ask. What the hell kind of name is that?
Selena just shrugs and starts to unbutton her flannel shirt. Her fingers dance over the buttons, teasing me. She’s not trying to, but she’s torturing me.
My cock is already hard and now it’s harder.
Just looking at her makes me feel like I’m going to explode.
“She’s new in town. Just moved here. She’s friends with Ariel and I guess she wanted a fresh start. I don’t know. She’s pretty quiet, to be honest.”
Ariel is the town social worker and she’s a badass. I saw how she helped Colby adjust to living with Carter and Savannah after his biological mother passed away, and she did a damn fine job. She was really supportive to the entire Blair family, so I have nothing but respect for her.
Still, trying to focus on what Selena is saying while she gives me a slow, easygoing striptease seems nearly impossible. Time seems to stop as she gradually unbuttons the rest of the flannel shirt. She tosses it onto the chair and pulls off the thin white shirt she had on beneath it. That lands on the chair beside the flannel.
Then she’s only wearing the jeans and her bra.
“Like what you see, cowboy?” Selena seems to notice me staring at her appreciatively.
“You’re fucking gorgeous, baby,” I move forward and put my hands on her waist. Damn, but she fits so perfectly in my hands. She fits so perfectly with my body, with my heart. She’s my soul.
Everything about her makes me just stop and question what I’ve been doing my entire life. I wasn’t even really living before I met Selena. I thought I was. I had plenty to do and was always rushing round, trying to get stuff done.
I never really enjoyed life, though. I never really slowed down enough to enjoy the world around me.
Selena makes me think. She makes me question. She makes me want. Sometimes we just shift together and go run. Sometimes we go to the mountains. Sometimes we go to the woods. Sometimes we race and sometimes we swim and sometimes we’re just together.
Sometimes we just enjoy the silence.
Sometimes we just want to be who we are together.
“You’re such a sweet talker,” she smiles at me, and I press my lips to hers. I claim Selena’s mouth in a sweet kiss, drawing it out. I take my time kissing her, then I reach around behind her back and carefully unhook her bra.
“I’m just trying to help you get ready for your shower,�
�� I tell her playfully, kissing her neck.
“I’ve taken showers before, Alex,” she tells me. “I think I can handle undressing myself.”
“But isn’t this more fun?” I suck one of her nipples into my mouth and tug gently, pulling it. I swirl my tongue around it until it’s in a hard point and then I suck once more.
“Oh,” she whispers, and I switch to the other nipple to repeat my torture. She doesn’t even protest as she grips my hair and holds me tightly. I suck harder until I know she’s turned on. I suck until I can smell her arousal seeping from her skin, between her thighs, from her very pores.
“You love this, baby,” I kneel in front of her and unbutton her jeans. “Admit it.”
“I don’t have to admit anything,” she teases.
“No?” I run my hands up and down her still-covered thighs. Fuck, I want to feel her skin beneath my hands. I don’t want to keep playing with her. I want to kiss her and lick her and suck her.
Forget the shower: I want to pamper this woman. I want to taste her, play with her. I want to be the one teasing her until she can’t remember her own name.
Only, I know Selena has had a long day. She was on her feet all day at work and she’s probably tired. She’s probably completely exhausted. She needs this, I know.
Somehow, over the past year, our nights together have morphed into something else. We don’t just get together, then fuck and run. No, we find heaven with each other. We find peace. For a little while, we can just be who we are. We can just chill. We can rest. We can find solace in one another.
We can find comfort from each other.
“Are you trying to tell me,” I kiss her belly button, then I slip her zipper between my teeth and tug it down. She lets out a little hiss. “That you don’t love every second of this?”
Selena’s hands are in my hair, then on my shoulders, then back in my hair. She can’t seem to decide where she wants them. She can’t seem to decide how she wants to touch me. She just knows she can’t stop.
