The grayed elder who had presided over the council stepped forward, his grief etched on his face. “Bianca Murphy, Guardian of Amazon, you have defended against your challenger. Amazon will be recognized by this Council. Patrick Murphy and Shelly Digby will be left in the woods in disgrace for what they have done. I am deeply sorry.” He came and bared his throat to Bianca, who caressed his gray face with a sob.
They could all feel the tug of the moon, urging them to shift and run. Jack growled his grief and frustration. He wasn’t ready. They weren’t ready.
“Jack. I love you brother. I have to go to work now.”
Fionn’s voice filled Jack’s mind, beautiful and powerful and terrible all at once. He whined his thanks, unable to let go of his mate.
Fionn stepped forward and murmured something to the elder, who stepped aside to let him speak. He raised his voice to be heard over the crowd, allowing his charisma to explode over the gathered wolves. “The sacrifice of the Raven has fulfilled a prophecy held sacred to our kind. Mid-Atlantic Pack has lost only two wolves today, though one was mated. The Usher Bianca’s Guide has led them into the spirit world, leaving the mate to the solace of Pack.” He bowed his head. “The weakness in our culture which allowed a pack like Amazon to exist and grow eighty-five hundred strong has ended. Because the Raven gave herself for the Usher. because the Usher gave her Guide for us. Her sacrifice strengthens all packs. All wolves. The Raven is now Guide to all wolves, and there will be no more ghosts among us. The rift in our culture is repaired.”
Fionn raised his arms toward the moon. “The Goddess, the moon spirit calls to all of us to accept her gifts and run as wolves. Will you run with me, brothers and sisters? Run with me, and thank the Goddess for the Raven who gave herself for us.”
With that, he shifted, and Jack felt his brother’s presence there, another drop in the tide of wolves he knew as Amazon, but separate. To his surprise, he felt other wolves joining the tide. Ted. The elder. Jack looked around and saw wolf after wolf take shape and run. Jack tried to withstand the call of the moon for as long as he could, but eventually, he succumbed to it, nudging Bianca with his muzzle. With one last kiss to Sara’s lifeless form, Bianca allowed her shift to overtake her, and she met Jack’s eyes with her own.
“Do you feel them all, my mate?”
“They’re all here. They’re all in me, like Amazon.”
“They are following Fionn, and so are we. The Unification is starting.”
“I’m not an Usher anymore.” Bianca the wolf whined a note of sadness and relief.
“You fought a former Alpha and defeated him. You were attacked blind by another wolf during the challenge. You let your Guide take her place in the spirit world. I think the Goddess is ready to let you live your own life now.”
“Run with me, mate.” Bianca nudged him with her muzzle.
Together, they took off at a run, following the sound of the wolves that had witnessed the first change, the wolves that had begun the second change. In their grief, they didn’t play and pounce as they often would have. They missed the feel of the Raven, icy cold and sharp in their minds. They longed to feel the wind soaring under her wings, but since that was not to be, they ran, hard and fast, feeling the wind whipping at their ears and tails. Jack felt his ears laying back flat against the wind as his tongue lolled out. He looked over to his mate and sent her a wave of his love, strong and fierce and full of everything they’d made together.
He felt her wave of love and gratitude wash over him, her reassurance that she would survive this pain, this loss. Through her grief, there was still so much love.
Chapter Seventeen
THEY STOPPED AT THE SAME MOTEL as before on the way back. Bianca pushed her way into the room ahead of Jack, trying to get a grip on the whirlpool of emotions.
“She knew.” She turned to face him.
He nodded.
“She knew what would happen, what I would choose.”
Another nod. Jack’s eyes were solemn, the pain in his face a mirror of her own.
“She knew if I let you fight, she’d…” She’d still be alive. And nothing, nothing at all, would be different.
“She knew, Bianca. She knew she wasn’t coming back with us. She couldn’t let you make a different choice.”
“Why?” She felt the frustration boiling up inside her, tears spilling as she reached for her mate. She felt his strength and took comfort in the rough way he embraced her.
“Because your choice was made already, love. Because there was no way, when my brother challenged us, that you were going to let me kill him. Because you love me, and you know what it would have cost me. Not in the heat of the moment, with my wolf riding me, but afterward.”
He tilted her head up, and she met his eyes.
“Could you have chosen differently?” he whispered.
She felt her head shaking from side to side.
“Bianca, no one, ever, has tried to protect me.”
She felt it then, his wonder and awe, pouring through the bond they shared. Her big strong mate who tried to take care of everyone. The Guardian who protected his wolves, no matter the personal cost. The man who detested violence, yet dealt it with ruthless efficiency when necessary. Of course she had protected him. She was Guardian, too.
“I love you, Jack.”
“I know, love. And Sara knew. She knew you’d choose to spare me that. She couldn’t let you know the cost of that choice.”
He drew her down to the bed and kissed her, achingly sweet. She felt his love for her, and she let it sweep through her.
“Love me, Jack.”
“I do. Always,” he reassured her. “I love you.”
As the Amazons, Fionn, and Annie drove back to the compound, Fionn was strangely quiet. He occasionally reached for Bianca’s hand, or Jack’s, to comfort them. He could feel their loss, piercing and bittersweet. He’d barely known Sara, but he loved her sister and knew Annie was grieving in her own way. He could feel Angelo’s envy, his regret. He could feel Ellen’s quiet, steady strength and the way that she missed her mate. As far away as Maryland, he could feel his brother Ted, guiding their old pack. Wolf after wolf rolled through his mind. His wolves. Needing him. Not as they needed their local Alphas, but as something bigger, something more.
He met Annie’s eyes and felt the sweeping emotion that felt so much like love. He could see the connection between Jack and Bianca now, could feel the strength of it, and he realized his bond with Annie was powerful in a different way. His thoughts wandered to sweet Sara, so delicate and quiet, and how unflinchingly she’d thrown herself into the throat of a wolf, simply to buy Bianca more time. He reached again to squeeze Bianca’s hand. Her chilling pale eyes met his with a sad smile. She was the only one who could truly understand the weight of what he was now.
“It’s not easy,” she whispered, “being the chosen one.”
“No,” he agreed. His brother was asleep, his head on Bianca’s lap as her fingers curled in his hair.
“You’ll hate us sometimes.”
“No, I won’t.” He smiled at her, feeling the need to protect her riding him as it did with all his wolves.
“I did,” she confessed, her eyes sad. “I didn’t want the responsibility of being the Usher.”
“What did Sara have to say about that?” He smiled at her.
“She basically told me to suck it up.”
“She knew, Bianca.” His blue eyes met hers. She saw the knowledge and the sadness there.
She nodded. “I know that now. I wish I could say that I wouldn’t have tried to stop her. I’m too selfish; I know I would have. It’s in my soul to want to protect her.”
“You’re a wolf, sister. And a Guardian. Of course it is. There’s no shame in wanting to protect your family.”
“You understand.” Her voice grew wistful. “You’re the chosen one now.”
Jack stirred in her lap, sitting up. Fionn brushed a hand across his brother’s face, sweeping the hair
out of his eyes like a father might.
“Hey, sleeping beauty,” Fionn teased.
“Is it my turn to drive?” Jack asked, and they all laughed.
Bianca squeezed him tightly. “No, love. Angelo is fine.” She leaned in to kiss him.
His arms came around her, and he slid his tongue into her mouth.
Fionn let out a bark of laughter.
“If you don’t like it, don’t look,” Jack grumbled against Bianca’s lips.
Fionn turned away to give them a bit of privacy.
Fionn led his wolves to the library elevator, and together, they greeted Monica. He stood back and watched as she embraced Bianca and then Jack, kissing them and weeping with them over the loss of the Guide. She was a beautiful woman, over two hundred years old. Her dark hair had been pulled into a braid, and the silver streaks at her temples made her look wise rather than old. He watched as she reached and hugged Annie close and whispered something in her ear, still holding tightly to Bianca and Jack. He watched as Annie nodded and squeezed Monica’s arm. Then Monica, Alpha of Amazon, turned to him. She was lovely even in her grief over losing Sara. She emanated a quiet power. It rolled from her, and he felt his wolf responding to it.
“You didn’t affiliate?”
He shook his head. She swallowed hard and then leaned her head to one side, showing her throat in an offer of obeisance. He felt his teeth lengthen in recognition of his mate, but he placed them at her throat tenderly, careful not to break the skin. He felt her join him. She was one of his now. The rest of Amazon swooped into him in a rush.
“Then we must join with you,” her voice murmured in his head. “We serve the Ushers, after all.” Her eyes met his, and she winked, her stern beautiful face transformed by the playful gesture.
He smiled back at her, forgetting to pull in his teeth, and he felt his brother laughing.
“Can’t fight fate, Finners.”
“Yeah, but you don’t have to marry it, either,” he lashed out at his brother and then turned on his heel and left. He stormed out of the library, hearing Annie following behind him. Torn by his attraction to the woman he knew was his mate and his affection for the one he had believed his mate for many years, he just stopped and howled.
“Fionn,” Annie sighed his name as his howl died on his lips.
“Why, Annie?” he demanded, suddenly angry.
Bianca’s words from the car crept into his mind. “You’ll hate us sometimes.” He felt a pang of understanding for what she’d been through. But he didn’t hate his wolves. He felt a vast, overwhelming paternal feeling toward them. He loved his wolves. He just wished it could be someone else in his shoes.
“Because the mother marked you, Fionn. She made you the most powerful wolf of a generation. She needs you to unite the packs, pave the way for the third Usher.” Annie came and took his hand. “You need her, you know.”
He nodded. “I don’t love her, Annie.”
“Oh, Fionn. You’re having what Sara always called a ‘why me?’ moment. Bianca used to have them all the time. She didn’t want Jack to be her mate, either. Look how happy they are together.”
“I want that with you,” he confessed.
She smiled. “I know. But you can’t have everything you want.” She looked down at their joined hands. “It’s not going to be easy, Fionn. It would be better if I had been with you those twenty years. I take responsibility for running away. I shirked my duty and let the wrong pussy make decisions. I’m sorry that I failed you.”
“You’ve never failed me, Annie. I’m glad you’re here now.” He grinned. “Even if the regime of cold showers is a little harsh.”
He heard a bark of laughter behind him. He turned and saw Jack and Bianca behind him. Bianca winked at him, taking Jack’s hand as they crossed the street to the residence halls. He saw Jack whisper something in her ear and saw the passion arc between them like a physical presence.
“Think they’ll make it to the elevators?” he asked Annie.
She shook her head, giggling. He felt his affection for her sweep through him. She was the best friend he’d ever had. Whatever they were up against, they were up against it together. And at least two of his wolves were happy.
He looked up and saw Monica standing at the library window, looking down at them.
His mate, if he would have her. If…
About the Author
Vanessa North was born in New England, but moved to the South as a teenager. She reads voraciously, writes obsessively, and takes thousands of photos of the people she loves.
She lives in Northwest Georgia with her husband, twin boy-children, and a pack of dogs. Find her online at:
Website: http://www.vanessanorth.com
Blog: http://vanessanorthwrites.wordpress.com
Twitter: @VanessaNWrites
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/authorvanessanorth
Amazon (The Ushers 1) Page 17
