Monster Nanny

by Tuutikki Tolonen

  Then things started happening. There was a loud bang in the closet. The door flew open as if it had been kicked. Why would anyone kick the door open like that? Because they were seething with rage and meant to attack the knockers right away, of course. And possibly, despite all that stuff about not eating humans, would gobble them up, meat, bones, book, and all. The children screamed. Halley grabbed Mimi in her arms and jumped to one side. Koby lifted the big monster book to shield himself and closed his eyes. Yes, he was stupid to close his eyes, but sometimes one does senseless things when frightened.

  Silence. Nobody rushed out of the closet. Koby opened his eyes and lowered the book. Halley took a step back and peeked inside. Mimi lifted her head, which she had pressed tightly against Halley’s shoulder.

  In the dark closet stood the monster, looking at them. Its scarily glowing yellow eyes ogled the children without expression.

  “It was startled,” Mimi said. “It got as big a fright as we did.”

  “What was that bang?” Koby asked.

  The monster gazed at them. Then it raised one of its huge hands, slowly and hesitantly, and pointed at the left-hand wall and murred quietly. The children looked inside.

  “What’s that?” Halley asked.

  On the wall, where the shelves had been, hung dark shreds.

  “Oh, the poor thing!” Mimi exclaimed. “It got caught on the shelf hooks! Can you see, bits of its coat are hanging from them. Did you get hurt, monster?” The monster grunted and patted its upper arm clumsily.

  “We startled it,” Mimi said again. She reached out and carefully stroked the monster. When her hand touched its coat, a little cloud of monster dust puffed into the air.

  “Mimi,” Halley warned, alarmed.

  “The monster really is kind. Just look at its eyes. It’s really nice,” Mimi said, stroking the monster. Halley and Koby looked at the monster’s wild yellow eyes darting here and there.

  In what way nice? The monster murred. Was it happy murring or dangerous human-eating murring? How could one tell? Koby and Halley gave each other an uncertain look.

  “Mimi,” Koby said in a low voice. “About the eating. Remember?”

  Mimi nodded.

  “Listen, monster,” Mimi said slowly, looking directly into the monster’s wild eyes. “Are you hungry? We’d like you to eat something.”

  The monster glanced at the children furtively. Its eyes rolled from side to side. Then its gaze stopped on Mimi and it nodded clumsily. Koby and Halley drew breath. It understood speech!

  “Good, very good,” Mimi went on soothingly. “You eat old leaves and such, don’t you? All sorts of things you find on the ground?”

  The monster stared at Mimi with its tennis ball eyes. Then it started to nod and grunt excitedly.

  “It’s absolutely starving,” Mimi explained to Koby and Halley, shaking her head with concern. “We’ve got to let it out to eat right now.”

  Mimi turned to the monster again.

  “Come. We’ll open the door for you. You can go find food for yourself. Look for whatever you want. There’s a forest right behind the building.”

  The monster was watching Mimi. It was now perfectly still and quiet.

  “Well, come on.”

  The monster slowly shook its head.

  “What? Why won’t you come?” Mimi asked.

  The monster raised it big clumsy hand and pointed first at itself, then at Mimi, Koby, and Halley.

  “What does it mean?” Koby asked.

  “What do you mean, monster?” Mimi asked. The monster did the same motions again: the huge, fuzzy, dust-dropping hand rose slowly, pointed first at the monster itself, then at each child in turn. Then it seemed to hesitate for a moment, before raising its hand a little bit more and pointing at the front door.

  “It wants us to go with it,” Mimi said quietly.

  “Why?” Koby asked.

  “Well, I’m not going out to the forest in the middle of the night with a monster,” Halley protested.

  “Halley!” said Mimi, disapproving. “Just think how the monster feels. It’s all alone in a strange place, it’s starving hungry, and it got caught on the hooks on the closet wall. And then it’s told it has to go outside alone to look for food. Just think if someone said that to you.”

  “I’m not a monster,” Halley replied meaningfully.

  “Bah! And you don’t understand anything,” Mimi huffed.

  “Do you want us to come outside with you?” Koby asked the monster.

  The monster turned to look at Koby and nodded slowly. Mimi had been right.

  “Let’s go, then,” Koby said. “Come on, monster. We’ll take you to the forest. Just behave yourself and don’t frighten anybody.”

  The monster grunted and edged out of its cramped closet, dust flying from its coat.

  CHAPTER 6

  In the Forest

  THE NIGHT FOREST was coolly damp and filled with all kinds of rustling. The sky was light and dusky at the same time, and a few ragged clouds wandered along, blown by the night wind.

  “It’s twelve fifty-two,” Koby whispered, and pulled his sweater tighter around him.

  “Is that late?” Mimi asked.

  “Yes,” Koby said. “You’ve never been out this late.”

  Mimi looked happy.

  Halley’s eyes darted around nervously. There were moving shadows and dark nooks all around, which could be hiding monsters or absolutely anything.

  Their own monster was running around somewhere in the woods. It had disappeared as soon as they got to the back of the building and the edge of the forest. The monster, which indoors had seemed to be clumsy, had become sure-footed and nimble as soon as it got outside. In a few seconds it had vanished, and the children had no idea where it was.

  “We’ll never find it again, and a good thing, too,” Halley said with a sniff.

  “It’ll come back, all right,” Koby replied. “It has to take care of us.”

  “It won’t come back,” Halley insisted.

  “Who’ll look after us if the monster runs off?” Mimi asked.

  “I will, of course. You didn’t really believe that some monster would look after you?” Halley snapped. Koby and Mimi didn’t answer. Koby’s inquiring eyes scanned the forest.

  “It’ll come back. We’ll just wait,” he said evenly.

  “No, it won’t. I want to go home,” Halley demanded. “It’s cold and scary here. Let’s go.”

  “We can’t leave the monster here alone,” Mimi said.

  “Let’s wait a bit. It’ll be back soon,” Koby said.

  “I’m sleepy,” Halley muttered.

  “So am I,” said Koby. “But it can’t be helped now.”

  Halley sighed. “Let’s at least walk a little, so it’s not so cold.”

  “Okay, we’ll walk,” Koby agreed.

  Near them ran a narrow path leading deeper into the forest. The children started walking. The path was so narrow that they had to walk single file. Koby was first, then Mimi, and Halley was last. Dense willows grew on both sides of the path, and their branches reached out toward them.

  “It was the world’s stupidest idea to bring that bathrobe along,” Halley scolded Mimi, trying to dodge the branches. “I hope you drop it and never find it again.”

  Mimi didn’t bother to answer. She had put the bathrobe on because Mom wasn’t there to stop her. Mom never let her go out of the house in her bathrobe. But now everything was different. Mom wasn’t home. It was after midnight. Mimi could wear her bathrobe if she wanted. And in any case, it wasn’t worth answering Halley when she was in this mood. Halley only wanted to argue, and it had nothing to do with Mimi’s bathrobe. It was all because Halley was cold and sleepy and scared. That would make anyone bad-tempered.

  Suddenly Mimi stopped so quickly that Halley bumped into her.

  “Ouch!” Halley yelped.

  “Shhh,” whispered Mimi.

  The children froze on the spot. The translucent, ligh
t-dusky night enveloped them like mist.

  “What did you hear?” Koby asked in a low voice.

  “No, smell,” Mimi whispered. “Smell the air. The monster is someplace very close.”

  Koby and Halley sniffed. From somewhere nearby came the familiar smell of earth cellar and rotten potato.

  “Someone’s compost stinks,” Halley muttered, but Mimi and Koby paid no attention to her.

  “Did you hear that!” Mimi asked suddenly. She turned her head from side to side, as if to hear better.

  “What?” Koby whispered.

  “Shhh,” Mimi hissed.

  The sound was tiny, just the kind you wouldn’t have noticed in daylight. But in the silent summer’s night, it was clearly discernible: something big and heavy was rolling on the ground and murring. Koby and Mimi exchanged a look.

  “Our monster,” Mimi said.

  “Or a bear or wolf or moose,” Halley whispered fearfully.

  “That’s the monster. And it must have eaten enough, because now it’s rolling in the leaves just like in Runar’s book. It’ll fall asleep next,” Koby said.

  “Monsters do not sleep,” Mimi corrected him.

  “According to the book they do,” Koby said. “In any case, if it’s not asleep, why does it lie down motionless with its eyes closed? If it’s not sleeping, what is it doing?”

  “I can ask the bathrobe next time,” Mimi replied.

  Halley groaned silently but followed the others toward the sound. She didn’t want to be left alone.

  Silently creeping, the children pushed through the dense willows to the edge of a small clearing.

  “Look,” Koby whispered.

  At the other side of the clearing, a big black creature was rolling and thrashing around. It had flung itself onto the ground; it spun and wallowed. It almost looked as if it were trying to swim. Or hug the ground. The stench of rotted leaves filled the clearing.

  “It’s happy,” Mimi whispered. “Look how it rolls and murs.”

  Halley shook her head in disbelief. There was their nanny thrashing around. Their own house monster.

  The air was thick with monster dust, and more puffed off the monster as it rolled around. The light wind blew the dust toward the children, and a few specks of it drifted straight into Halley’s nose. And since Halley’s nose was already irritated, it instantly started to want to sneeze quite uncontrollably. Nothing could be done about it. Halley sneezed, and in the silent summer night, the sneeze sounded pretty much the same as a cannon shot. Mimi let out a scream in fright. Koby jumped. A few birds that had been asleep flapped into the air, startled.

  Naturally, the sneeze was also heard by the monster, and it stopped rolling. It froze on the spot and listened. How well can monsters hear? The children had not yet read that bit in Runar’s book.

  The monster stood up slowly and turned its yellow glowing eyes toward the children.

  “Can it see us?” Halley asked, frightened.

  “Perhaps,” Koby whispered.

  “Monster! Here we are! Here!” yelled Mimi, waving her arm.

  “Are you crazy!” Halley hissed, and pushed Mimi’s arm down.

  “What do you mean? It’s our monster. Didn’t we come looking for it?” Mimi asked, puzzled.

  On the other side of the clearing, the monster shook its coat and started padding toward them. The ground thumped with the weight of its steps, and with every one, its ragged coat shed leaves, twigs, and clumps of earth. The monster looked as if it had grown in height and girth. It looked magnificent and powerful.

  “Look how beautiful it is,” Mimi said, sighing adoringly. Koby and Halley didn’t answer. The monster coming toward them in the summer night had left them dumbfounded.

  The monster stopped in front of them. Its eyes had a new wild glow as it looked at the children.

  “Feeling better now?” Mimi asked. “Had enough to eat?” The monster grunted and slapped its belly. Mimi giggled.

  “Shall we go home now?” she asked.

  The monster nodded. It bent down a little as if to get set and then charged straight through the thicket. The air filled with crashing and snapping as branches cracked and broke off. The monster growled as it went, but it sounded contented. It was good, strong monster growling.

  “Wait for us!” Mimi shouted, and set off running after the monster. It was easy to run through the bushes now. The monster had made a big opening in them, almost like a gate.

  “Come on, come on!” Mimi called to Halley and Koby. “Monster! Wait a minute!”

  Farther away in the gloomy forest, the monster stopped and grunted hollowly like a huge pig.

  “You run really fast,” Mimi complimented it when they caught up to the monster. “You’ll have to move a little slower now, or nobody will be able to keep up with you.”

  “Speak for yourself, Mimi,” muttered Halley, who had been the winner at least twice in school running races. If Mimi couldn’t keep up with the monster, it didn’t mean that Halley couldn’t.

  “You’re no match for the monster,” Mimi giggled. “Or do you want to try?”

  It was a question that should have been left unasked. Because there were some things that Halley could not resist. Things like chocolate, soccer, and a new baseball cap for her collection. They were all important things in Halley’s life, but they were nothing compared to what she was really interested in: competing. Any kind of competing. The mere thought of a competition filled Halley with irresistible euphoria and buzzing that whooshed right up to her ears.

  “Let’s have a race, monster!” Halley said defiantly. This was the first time she spoke to the monster directly.

  The monster looked at Mimi. Was it asking for permission?

  “Take no notice. Halley is like that. She always wants to race,” Mimi said to the monster, and wrinkled her nose.

  “Halley, it’s not worth racing with the monster,” Koby said. “You saw how it charged through the trees. It’s incredibly strong.”

  Halley rolled her eyes at Koby. “But I’m fast,” she said. “I don’t need to go through trees.”

  “Of course you’re fast, but do you see, the monster is a thousand times faster.”

  “We’ll race and then we’ll know,” Halley insisted, throwing a challenging look at the monster.

  The monster was still staring at Mimi, who let out a sigh. There was no stopping Halley.

  “Run, if you want to,” Mimi said to the monster.

  The monster grunted and held out its earthy, dark hand to Mimi, who took it right away. How tiny Mimi’s hand looked on the monster’s palm! Almost as if the monster were holding a lollipop or a little goldfish in its hand. The monster bent down and lightly picked Mimi up in its arms. Mimi sneezed.

  “Awful dust. We’ll have to take you out to the rug-beating rack to give you a bashing,” Mimi giggled.

  The monster murred happily.

  “It likes Mimi,” Koby said to Halley. “Don’t you think?”

  But Halley didn’t hear. She was excited by the thrill of the race and eyed the monster boldly.

  “Are you going to run while carrying Mimi?” Halley asked. The monster turned to Halley and nodded.

  “Very well,” Halley said. “But you’re counted as one runner. The finish line is our door. No tricks. Nothing like throwing Mimi through the forest. We’re going to run—do you understand? The winner is whoever first touches their foot to the front door of our building.”

  The monster nodded. Mimi was sneezing and giggling in its arms.

  “What about me?” Koby asked.

  “Follow us,” Halley replied haughtily. She always became a little bit boastful at sporting contests. Koby was not a particularly fast runner.

  “I don’t want to be left alone in the forest. Having a race is really stupid,” Koby said.

  “What, you’re not scared, are you?” Halley sniggered.

  “You are such a numskull, Halley,” Mimi said, sneezing. “Monster, can you pick up Koby, too?�
�

  “N—” Koby started before the monster scooped him up in its other arm.

  “Achoo! I’m not—Achoo!—sure if I want—Achoo!”

  “Be quiet for once,” Mimi giggled, then sneezed. “We’ll beat Halley easily. She hasn’t got a hope. Achoo!”

  “Ready, set, GO!” Halley yelled, and raced off in the direction of home as fast as her legs would carry her.

  “False start!” Koby shouted, but he had no time to say anything more, as the monster shot off after Halley. Koby quickly closed his mouth and eyes. The less one knew about the scenery flashing by, the less scared one was.

  The monster did not dodge tree stumps or trees or anything at all. It stormed ahead like a hippopotamus or a steam engine. Its huge heart beat hollowly deep inside its chest. The monster murred and grunted, one hoped more with contentment than rage, but one could not be absolutely sure. Tree branches swiped at Koby and Mimi, and they yelped quietly. It was impossible to avoid scratches in the monster’s arms. On the other hand, such speed could not be experienced anywhere else. It felt like they were on a roller coaster that only went downhill.

  Until, that is, the monster stopped dead. The stop was so sudden and unexpected that it was only the monster’s thick arms that kept Mimi and Koby from being flung into the bushes. Silence hissed in their ears. The monster’s heart thumped in its chest; apart from that, it was totally quiet.

  Koby and Mimi opened their eyes, frightened. They were not at home yet. They were in a very dense thicket near the building. The monster’s alert, wild eyes stared through the bushes toward the other side.

  “Achoo.” Mimi sneezed as quietly as she could and pressed her face against the monster’s chest. Of course, that was a mistake, as she only wanted to sneeze more than ever.

  “Achoo, achoo, achoo!” Mimi sneezed in a muffled voice.

  The sound was not much, but it was enough. Somewhere very close, a dog started to bark angrily, almost accusingly.

  Mimi got such a fright that she stopped sneezing instantly. She knew the barker. It was Eric from the first floor, the most fearsome dog in the world. He was a dog who wanted to know everything and poke his nose into everything. He was a dog who thought himself the official guard of the apartment building and therefore raised a horrendous racket if anything unusual happened. And there was no doubt that running through the forest at night with a monster was unusual. Eric was barking like crazy. They could only hope that he was on his leash.