by Zoe Perdita
I only have the energy to nod.
He starts the tub and gathers me into his arms, my lanky form fitting into his broad one like pieces of a perfect puzzle. For the first time since my parents died I’m actually happy.
Once we're clean (for the second time) and dry and dressed, we head downstairs for whatever's left of breakfast. A few cold plates of meat, eggs and toast wait for us on the table while Pasha stands at the sink doing dishes. He glances over his shoulder and nods, although he doesn't look particularly happy. His pale blond hair tickles the edge of his brow and the back of his neck. His fair skin and blue eyes make him look almost Scandinavian instead of Russian. The gentle curve of his chin and eyebrows and the high cheekbones and full lips make him look like an angel- beautiful and innocent. He's the shortest of the brothers, standing a few inches under six feet, but his slender frame makes him seem even smaller. It's hard to imagine he's a werewolf too. Hell, it's hard to imagine any of them are werewolves.
"Yuri wants to talk to you," he says and glances at Dmitri.
Dmitri shrugs and shovels a few pieces of bacon into his mouth. "Is he home?"
Pasha shakes his head and dries his hands on the dishtowel, turning around to face us. I slowly take a few piles of everything. I don't have the appetite of a wolf, and that’s a good thing for my pocketbook. I don't know how they afford all this food.
"He left early this morning with Alexei and Nikolai," the youngest brother says. "But they'll be back for lunch."
"So just you to have to protect me until then?" I ask and think about the white wolf for the first time since the day before. I still don’t know what he wants with me, or why he attacked me seven years ago- marking my side with his scar. At least that bastard hasn't had the nerve to come after me during the day so I'll probably be fine.
"Yes," Pasha says and wrings his hands in front of him. "I heard you last night."
For some reason, the heat rises to my cheeks as I remember the look on the little blond's face when we jerked each other off the day before. It's part of my wolf’s bait curse, I guess, to be undeniably attracted to these gorgeous Russian men (or just werewolves in general). But it's not only on my part- they want me as badly as I want them, so at least it's even. To date I've fooled around with every Lowell brother, but Dmitri's the only one who fucked me like that.
"So?" Dmitri says and looks his little brother square in the eye with a seriousness I'm not used to.
Pasha pouts and crosses his arms over his gently muscled chest. He rattles something off in Russian- something that sounds angry- and Dmitri stands up and growls at him. Shit. What kind of argument are they going to get into now?
"I didn't have a choice!" Pasha cries and tosses the dishrag on the floor. "You shouldn't have done it. You shouldn't have claimed him without Yuri's consent!"
Once again, their lost in their own little wolf pack world, and I'm left to decipher what the hell they're talking about for myself. I vaguely remember Dmitri saying something about claiming me the night before, but I have no idea what it means. Might as well ask since they're obviously not going to tell me.
I clear my throat to get their attention. "What does claiming me mean? And isn't Yuri constantly pissed about everything? How is that new?" Although he’s just as gorgeous as the others, the oldest Lowell brother isn't particularly known for his even temperament.
Both Dmitri and Pasha look at me with furrowed eyebrows. I guess my attempt to lighten the mood failed, so I frown back at them and wait for my answer. This is one of those times when staying alone sounds like a good idea. It seems like all I've done since I got back to my hometown is fight or fuck around with Lowell brother when I’m supposed to be settling my dead parent’s affairs.
Pasha sighs and glares daggers Dmitri. "You didn't even tell him?"
"Tell me what?" I ask and glance back and forth between them. But when I look at my best friend he can't meet my eyes. Shit. What the hell is going on?
"Tell him," Pasha growls.
Dmitri stares at the floor for what seems like an age. I glanced down at the worn yellow linoleum myself and wonder what he finds so interesting about it. Outside the constant buzz of tractors and insects fills the air and floats into the quiet kitchen. Every second that passes makes my heart beat faster and sweat beads across my brow and over my bare back. I know people change, and I've been gone for seven long years, but I remember what Dmitri was like when we were younger and whatever he's thinking must be pretty damn serious. That's his 'I fucked up and I don't want to admit it' face. Problem is: how much does his fuck up have to do with me?
Finally, he takes a deep breath and looks at me. "I claimed you last night, Sammy."
I shrug. "Yeah. You already said that. What does it mean?"
Dmitri casts a dangerous glance at his younger brother before he goes on. "It means you’re my mate." He flinches as he says it and stares at me right in the eyes.
Am I supposed to react to that? I seriously don't even know what it means! "Like a boyfriend?" I ask.
"Like a husband," Pasha says.
My heart does that weird flippy thing again although I don't know if it's good or bad. "So we’re married in werewolf terms?"
Dmitri nods slowly and bites the bottom of his lip. "And it's for life. We mate for life."
"What? For life? But I'm not a wolf. I'm just wolf’s bait so how does that even apply to me?"
Pasha throws his hands up into the air and shakes his head. "See? This is what Yuri was afraid of. If he's not in our pack he won't want to follow our rules!"
"Fuck right I don't want to follow your rules! Especially when I'm not even told about them!” My heart slams in my chest, and I ball my hands into fists, glaring at Dmitri. "What the hell were you thinking?"
"If I did tell you would you have said yes?" Dmitri asks and his deep green eyes burn across my skin. It's hard to look at him and not remember how he makes my body feel- how they all make me feel. But that's not important right now. It's the goddamn principle of the thing!
"I don't know, but it would've been nice to have the option!"
Dmitri sneers. “If I didn't claim you last night Yuri would have. Right, Pasha? That's really why he's angry. Because he didn't get to Sammy first!"
The blond's cheeks flush a deep red, and he looks at his hands. "We have to protect him, and Yuri thought that was the best way."
"Bullshit!" Dmitri shouts and slams his fists on the table, making the plates rattle and dance. "He just wanted to be the first to get Sammy. He’s always wanted to be the first!"
Pasha gapes like a fish out of water, and I glare at both of them.
"So no matter who 'claimed' me I wouldn't get a choice. That's what you're saying? My opinion means shit to you guys? Is this a wolf thing or just because you’re all assholes?"
"It’s for your own protection," Dmitri says and bears his sharp canines at me. "If the white wolf captured you, he would've claimed you too!"
My entire body sizzles- the kitchen is suddenly too hot, too stuffy. That’s what that freaky white wolf wants with me? To make me his mate? Shit! Looking at Pasha and Dmitri just makes everything worse. “So when were you planning on telling me about all this?"
"It’s not all his fault," Pasha breaks in. "Yuri was going to claim you, but then we all were."
"All of you? I'd be mates with every member of your pack for life?" For just a minute, my body tingles as I entertain the thought. I could belong all five Lowell brothers- be their mate- their lover- that's a whole lot of never going unsatisfied for the rest of my life. But is sex the only thing that matters?
Dmitri nods. "Yes, we all were going to claim you as a pack. It's common in Europe for packs to share one mate."
I'd probably be flattered if I wasn’t so pissed off right now.
"We all want you as a mate," Pasha says and grabs my hand. His hot fingers sear into my flesh, and my body and soul begs me to give in- to stand there and let myself be consumed by him, by Dmitri and the re
st of the pack. But my mind has other ideas.
I pull my hand away and glare of both of them, backing toward the door. "So all that matters is what you want, not what I want? You guys lied to me for years! Kept secrets from me! You obviously don't think I'm trustworthy, and you know what? The feeling's mutual!"
"Sam," Dmitri says and takes a step toward me.
I shake my head and scratch at the scar on my side- the long, dark red marks the white wolf gave me seven years ago. There's a reason I left this place to begin with- to get away from the Lowell brothers because my obsession with them was all consuming. Not healthy. I was on the right fucking track.
"What? Are you going to apologize? Just like you did when we were eighteen? Sorry that creature almost killed you! No wonder Yuri was so pissed. You were trying to claim me, even back then! And once again you didn't even fucking ask!"
"I didn't want you to say no!" Dmitri barks, his voice echoing throughout the farmhouse.
My blood seems to boil in my veins. "You should have given me the choice. If you trusted me- if you respected me- you would've let me make up my own mind instead of making it for me. All of you," I say and yank open the kitchen door, storming out into the yard.
"Sammy!" Pasha calls, but I ignore him and stomp across the neatly mowed lawn and into my weed ridden one.
I don't hear a damn thing but the rush of blood in my ears as I pull the keys from my pocket and climb into my little beat up car. Dmitri stands on their front porch with Pasha next to him, and they shout something, but with the windows rolled up I can't hear what they say. And I really don't give a fuck right now. After all this bullshit I don't know what the hell to do. Mates for life? Are they fucking kidding me? I'm not a goddamn werewolf. How can I be a member of their stupid, secretive pack if they don't tell me shit? I didn't want any of this. I didn't even want to come back here.
My car sputters a few times before it finally kicks to life, and I back out of the dusty driveway and turn toward the main road. In the rearview mirror I watch Dmitri and Pasha run after me, but I ignore them and accelerate toward freedom. Freedom from the Lowell brothers, freedom from my past, freedom from this stupid country town. I'm not running away- I just can't deal with this level of bullshit anymore. I'm better on my own. Much better.
My hands shake on the steering wheel, and I don't pay attention to which turns I take or which roads I'm on. It takes about twenty minutes for me to realize I'm headed towards the mountains, but I don't bother to turn around. Maybe I'll just sleep in my car and keep driving forever. I don't have to go back and deal with my parent’s house and the Lowell brothers, do I? Shit. I do. It's my responsibility, and if my parents taught me anything it was to take responsibility.
Well, if I'm gone for a few days maybe it'll make those assholes feel sorry for their actions. Now I sound like a bratty little kid. But I'm still pissed- still can't believe Dmitri would do this to me. But that's not the only thing. I can't believe he wants me that badly. I can't believe he'd go to those lengths to get me to be his forever. Is he in love with me or something? If so, he's never said a damn word about it. What do I know? Maybe that's how werewolves are! ‘We're mates for life’ means ‘I love you!’
The knot in my stomach grows the farther I drive, like it's weaving a complicated home for itself in my gut. He still should've told me. Even if I'm wolf’s bait- if the Lowell brothers think I'm their friend or lover or whatever they should have told me.
Suddenly my car makes a weird noise as it starts the long climb up the mountain.
"Shit," I whisper and press on the accelerator, hoping it'll power through whatever problem it's having. Instead it splutters and dies, and I roll it to a stop on the side of the lonely road. Just fucking great!
I slam my hands against the steering wheel and rattle off a line of inarticulate curses, all aimed at my stupid old car and the hot Russian brothers. Then, once my heart stops hammering in my chest, I take a deep breath and think. A quick check of the glove compartment tells me what I already knew- my cell phone is back at the house. Shit. And I'm stuck on a mountain with no way to call anyone. Wonderful.
Climbing out of my car, I look up and down the road. Sure it's a weekday, but it is still summer. Lots of people in the city like to go hiking on this mountain, so hopefully someone will drive by soon and help me out. A jumpstart would be nice, but I'll settle for a call to a tow truck. No way in hell I'm calling Dmitri- not yet.
For the first time since I left I realize I'm still not wearing a shirt. Why didn't I take the time to put one on? I can't remember. Glancing at a little stream that runs parallel to the road, I sigh. The air up here chills my skin, much cooler than the heat in the valley below. A part of me thought Dmitri and Pasha would follow, but then I remember Yuri, Alexi and Nikolai already had their two vehicles in use. I wonder how pissed they are at me and lean against my hood and wait. And wait. And wait.
Thirty minutes later with no cars in sight, I take off down the mountain on foot. It's still early in the day so I can probably make it back to civilization before night falls. I just hope there aren't any other wolves in these woods, and if there are I hope they don't smell me.
After walking down the road for a while I spot a driveway and a mailbox signaling life on the mountain. Sure it's kind of dangerous to wander onto someone's property uninvited, but I don't really choice at the moment. Glancing around at the overgrown garden and the towering fir trees, I wonder who lives out here. The house is a ramshackle old building that looks like it used to be a cabin, but it's been added onto so many times now it's just a mess of wood and shingles. A big red pickup sits parked in the dirt driveway so I hope that means someone's home. I also hope the family is friendly enough to let me use their phone to call for help. Good thing my wallet's in my pants.
The porch stairs creak as I climb them, and I knock three times on the wooden door. No answer. After a couple minutes, I knock again, and again no answer. Shit. Looks like no one is home- great. As I turn off the steps and start back toward the driveway I notice movement in the woods. A flash of pale hair. Pasha?
Then a man steps out of the shadow of trees. A man I've seen before. The huge Scandinavian looking guy from hardware store. This time his chest is bare, revealing his thick muscles and a carpet of pale blond curls. An axe hangs casually over his broad shoulders, and he runs a hand through his fair hair. The striking arctic blue eyes pin me with a gaze, and I swallow the lump in my throat. He's too tall, too broad, too everything. My scar gets that annoying tingly itch, the one that seeps into my veins and consumes my entire body. I clench my fists and force myself not to scratch it.
"Can I help you with something?" he asks and leans on the axe like a cane.
Suddenly, I feel like a rabbit caught by predator. Maybe I am. Shit. I probably shouldn't admit my car broke down, but how else my supposed to get him to let me use his phone? Probably just stupid nerves. It's not like I know this guy or anything. Although Pasha seemed freaked out of him. Could this guy be the white wolf? If so, I'm seriously fucked.
I open my mouth to speak, but the words don't come out. It's like they dry up in my throat and die. I just stand there staring at him. Just like before, my skin beads with sweat, my heart pounding so hard in my chest it feels like it's trying to break free. And my scar- my goddamn scar itches so badly I’d like to rip it off.
"Speechless, are we?" he says and takes a slow step toward me.
Without meaning to, I take a step back. Good. At least I can still move.
He chuckles, a low deep sound reverberating in his chest and out through the quiet woods. "No need to be scared, Sam."
"How do you know my name?" I ask, and wish my voice sounded more incredulous than the frightened squeak that actually comes out. He’s a wolf, no doubt. My body only acts this way around them. But is he the white wolf?
"I know a whole lot about you, boy. But that's not important. I have a feeling you didn't show up here on purpose," he says and sniffs the air just like an
animal would. "And I don't smell that Eurasian pack either."
I know he's talking about the Lowell brothers, and for the first time since our stupid fight this morning I feel sorry for leaving. Sorry I ever got angry with Dmitri for claiming me as his life mate. If I'd only stayed put like they told me to none of this would be happening. And now they have no idea where I am or who I’m with.
"Phone. I need a phone," I stutter and hate myself for sounding so weak and helpless. I wish I could break away from his intense gaze but his eyes hold me in place.
He raises a pale eyebrow and smirks, showing the sharp hint of canines. “Oh. You want to borrow my phone. What's in it for me?"
Appealing to his altruistic nature probably won't work. The only thing I can really do is run for it, and I know that's futile. He's faster, stronger, and he knows I'm wolf's bait. What good is it attracting werewolves when I'm useless around them?
"I'll just be on my way then," I say and force myself to step forward. Maybe if I just keep walking he'll let me go. Or maybe he's straight and not interested in male wolf’s bait. That’s possible, right?
His eyes follow me as my shoes crunch over the dirt and gravel. Every nerve in my body tunes to his overwhelming presence. If he moves to follow me, I'll run. Even if I can't get away- even if it's stupid and pointless- I'll run as fast as I can before he catches me. I'm not going down without a fight!
Then suddenly a combination of sounds comes from behind me. The rip of clothing, the snap of bones like a breaking branch and the heavy padding of bare feet on the ground. I fight every instinct in my body to turn and look- to see what he's doing. Instead I take off toward the road. Toward freedom and safety.
My feet slam against the forest floor. Running straight down the driveway is what he'd expect, so I turn into the trees to throw him off. Roots and branches try to trip me up as I bob and weave around trees, bushes and the debris that litters the ground. My breath comes in ragged gasps. I need to make it back to my car. I have to make it back to Dmitri and Yuri. To Pasha, Alexei and Nicolai. They can all claim me. I don't care anymore. They can claim me as long as they'll protect me from wolves like him.
