Rules-Free VRMMO Life: Volume VII: The Tribeslands

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Rules-Free VRMMO Life: Volume VII: The Tribeslands Page 5

by Stuart Grosse


  Darkmore’s Bitch: And they say I was a slow learner.

  Crackle: What happened to the fifth survivor?

  Daywalker: Oh, she’s my vampire servant now. There’s a mine that was formerly full of undead that we’ll be using as a base of operations.

  Scholar: So you have elves, lycans, and now vampires helping to protect your castle?

  Lexichan: And we’ve got a dwarf craftsman working the forge, and a gnome artificer helping come up with ‘improvements’. Oh, and a bunch of drow, and a dragon. Few others.

  Scholar: What’s keeping you from taking over Wyrmwood?

  Darkmore: Meh. I could probably manage something, but why would I want to do that? Running a guild and a castle are enough hassle already. Running an entire country? No thanks!

  RighteousAmazon: AND NONE OF IT WILL SAVE YOU WHEN I GET FREE!

  Darkmore: Sexy_Lady, if you put a slave collar on RighteousAmazon here and ‘free’ her from her golem playmates, I’ll give you a ride you’ll never forget.

  Sexy_Lady: DONE!

  RighteousAmazon: What, NO! DON’T LISTEN TO HIM!

  Sexy_Lady: Stupid whore. Some of us LIKE the patriarchy!

  Raunaeril: Just when I think I’ve seen everything…

 

 

  Crackle: So, the new zone is supposed to be level 80+, right?

  Darkmore: Yeah, but the gate is close enough to the city that you can get from it to the safe zone, no problem. Don’t start shit in the city, or you’ll get ganked, obviously.

  Crackle: Hmm. This will drive down the cost of demonsteel, won’t it?

  Darkmore: Yep. With easier access, it should become a lot more common.

  Crackle: Eeexcelent!

  Scholar: What about angelsteel?

  Darkmore: Well, if I thought I could do it without calling down some righteous whoopass on my own head, I’d open a gate to the celestial planes, as well, but I’m pretty sure they don’t approve of me, or my methods.

  MightKord: Sacrificing an entire village does seem just a bit over the top evil, yeah.

  Might_Makes_Right: So, which Orc clan are you visiting after the trolls?

  Darkmore: Don’t see why it matters, but Black Rock Hold.

  Lexichan: You do know that there’s a bounty on your head, right?

  Darkmore: Really? Awesome!

  Lexichan: What?

  Darkmore: Seriously, bring it on! I’ll crush them, take a couple trophies, and it’ll be fine.

  Scholar: Trophies?

  Darkmore: Oh, yeah. Way back after I first got to Wyrmwood, and was made a Knight and all, I met some idiots from the Sons. Cut the wings off a half-celestial elf, and gave me the Trophy Hunter title. If I take a trophy from someone I kill, then it doesn’t disappear. Better yet, if I take a trophy from a Traveler I kill, then they respawn still missing that part. Well, unless it was something critical, like their head. In that case, they respawn as an undead.

  MightKord: Damn, that’s cold.

  Darkmore’s Bitch: Oh, that isn’t the worst he can do.

  l44tPally: What?!?

  Darkmore’s Bitch: After he ‘acquired’ me, he spitted me, like with a steel spit and everything, and roasted me alive! And the bastard had the spit enchanted so that it healed me the same as the DoT from the spit and the fire! I was still alive while they carved me!

  Darkmore: But you tasted excellent, you must admit.

  MightKord: You didn’t…

  Darkmore’s Bitch: He did. He made me eat my own tits! He kept having his other slaves heal me enough to keep me conscious while they ate.

  Dread_Doom: *is going to be sick*

  Might_Makes_Right: Umm. I think I’ll skip meeting you for now.

  MightKord: That sounds like a good plan.

  Lexichan: Damnit, Zayn.

  Raunaeril: Told you that story would get out.

  Brecilac: *pays the 10 GP*

  Lexichan: You two were betting on this?

  Raunaeril: Naturally!

  Brecilac: Of course!

  Darkmore: HAHAHAHA!

  Chapter 79 – Trolling the Trolls

  Trolls are known for a few basic things.

  First, they are, almost universally, big, strong, and dumber than a sack of hammers. Second, they heal really fast, and are resistant to physical damage. Third, the only way to kill the fuckers is with fire, as that stops their regeneration. Except for fire trolls. Those beasties need ice. But they didn’t show up except in volcanoes and deserts and the like.

  Most importantly to most people, however, was the fact that trolls had a very nasty habit of catching and eating people. However, not all the people they captured ended up on the menu. Not at first, anyways. See, Trolls were almost exclusively male. Kindof like Smurfs, if smurfs were hulking eight-foot-tall idiots who lived for the purpose of eating, fighting, and fucking.

  Oh yeah. Since trolls were almost exclusively male, the only way they could reproduce was by catching females, and raping them to produce their broods. Needless to say, few women who survived such an ordeal, and the subsequent pregnancy, were ever the same again.

  Since the only way to ‘negotiate’ with trolls was to cow them with a display of power, and the brutes were too stupid to remember the lesson if it wasn’t regularly reapplied, this meant that trolls were, understandably, not welcome in most places. In fact, it was only here in the Tribeslands, where there was no unifying authority, that they could even begin to do something like building their own settlement. Anywhere else and they would have been killed or dispersed long ago.

  But that only lasted for so long. Eventually, the trolls forgot their ‘lessons’, and started attacking travelers cutting across the tribeslands. This caused a series of small battles, but none of the tribes had the manpower to take out the trolls without opening themselves to an attack from one of their rivals. So someone contacted the Adventurer’s Guild, put up a request, and now I was on my way to kill some trolls.

  Finding the trolls was easy. Their village was marked on my map, and there was a distinct lack of wildlife around, with so many hungry monsters all in one place. Oh, and there was the remains of a caravan on the road, destroyed by the trolls, with all the bodies of people and animals missing. Most of the goods on the wagons were either ruined or useless to me, but I found a lockbox containing a good amount of coins and jewelry, along with a few other small bits of loot.

  Oh, and a really nice tent.

  Charbek’s Movable Mansion

  Type

  Tool

  Rank

  Rare

  From the outside, this object is nothing more than a traveler’s tent. Nicer than the simple tent a common traveler may use, but easily what a noble or wealthy merchant might use while on the road. Inside, however, is an extradimensional space that can change between one of five settings chosen by the creator during the item’s creation.

  Current setting: Sultan’s Palace

  Provides comfortable shelter for up to 20 people. The space provides basic food and drink according to the setting, but anything more complicated must be brought in from the outside.

  Settings – Can be changed to one of the following five settings: Island Villa, Sultan’s Palace, King’s Castle, Elven mansion, Dungeon complex

  Indestructible – Exterior item is immune to damage. Interior space repairs itself when changed to a new setting.

  Quick-set – Command word causes the tent to set itself or collapse ready for transport.

  WARNING: Individuals who remain in the space when the command to collapse the tent is given may be trapped in the extradimensional space until the tent is set up again.

  Anyways, now that ‘roughing it’ while we were traveling was a thing of the past, we followed the trail the trolls had left. They had some captives, and they were dragging bodies, so it would have been easy to track them, even if trolls weren’t about as subtle as a South American soccer riot.

  The
troll ‘village’ of Trollmoore was really nothing but a few VERY rough huts made of logs and piled stone, set against a cave entrance. The only defenses in place were the trolls themselves, and even then, most of the trolls were engaged in their three favorite pastimes, and not paying a bit of attention to the rest of the world.

  While killing humans and the like was easy for my group, we were really lacking in the ‘fire’ department. A couple of us had weapons that did fire damage, but otherwise, the majority of the fire damage we had available to us was through me, or Kylana, and our hellfire attacks. That meant we needed a plan to chop these brutes into bite sized pieces so we didn’t get overrun.

  Aya Bitar

  High Human Female

  Level 40 Humanoid Monster Tamer (Tamer) / Ranger

  Titles: Taboo Tamer

  Troll Warrior

  Troll Male

  Level 60 Barbarian

  Titles: Human Bane, Violator

  I put together a wonderful plan, really, involving me, Severa, and Kamla stealthing through the village laying down trails of oil that we’d use to create fires that would divide the village into sections, making it easy to conquer. Then I threw out that plan as a very pretty (and very naked) human woman came running around a corner, and nearly lept into my arms, followed by a very large (and also very naked) troll. Given that the ‘weapon’ dangling between the troll’s legs made the outrageous thing I had look small, I didn’t blame her for running.

  Unfortunately, there was no way to do this quietly, so we’d have to settle for quick and brutal. I used one hand to pull the naked woman up against me, where she would be out of the line of fire, and then it was on. Della’s ice spell locked the troll in place, and the rest went to town, swarming and overwhelming the troll, who began yelling once the shock of our attack wore off. Fortunately, Kylana and I unleashed hellfire blasts at the same time, silencing the creature.

  With the fight done, we paused, ready and listening for any sounds of further trouble. Fortunately, it sounded like a big fight had broken out between a couple trolls, so the one troll’s noise didn’t seem to raise the alarm. I hoped that anyone that heard it figured it was just the troll enjoying a ‘victory’ over the attempted runaway.

  Turning to said runaway, who was almost certainly in shock, and was trying very hard not to break down as she leaned against my chest, I said, “Now, sweety, as much as I love having a pretty lady cuddle up against me like that, why don’t you tell us if there is anyone else left alive. That’ll change how we go about doing this.”

  The woman suddenly realized I was talking apparently, and shook her head. When she spoke, she was all business, on the face of things. I figured she was blocking everything out until we finished this. “The rest of my party is still back there! There’s only four of us left. The two guys died defending the caravan, along with the NPC guards.” Ah, so she was a Traveler. That explained a few things. “Essie and Canki were still chained in the cage. They’d almost run through the rest of the women, so when they tried to grab me, Dae made a play, and I was able to run. Are you here to kill these monsters?”

  “Yeah, got a quest to kill off this entire village. Guess we’ll have to do this the hard way now that we have people to rescue.” I considered the options, and pulled out the tent. When I gave the command, it opened up and set itself into the ground. Very convenient. Looking at our naked damsel, I said, “Get in. We’ll close the dimension up, and you’ll be safe until we can finish this.” She didn’t look happy, but when the alternative was running around the country naked with horny trolls after her, she did what she was told. Once she was in, I closed up the tent.

  Looking to the others, I said, “Kamla, Severa, stealth and scout. Find that cage and free the women. This area will be home base. Try to bring them back this way, if you can. The rest of you, we don’t have time to make this simple. So Kylana, forget about the divide and conquer strategy. I need a wall of flame to keep the trolls from escaping. Make it so their only retreat is into that cave. The rest of you, protect her. I’ll supply the diversion.”

  We broke up into our groups, and I shifted into my drake form. Now that we were fighting in open terrain more often, this form was seeing a lot more use than I’d been giving it before. Flying up above the village, I saw the main gathering area of the trolls. It was little more than a wide open space, where about 40 of the 50 or so trolls reported to be in the village were gathered, eating what were clearly the remains of the men from the caravan. There was a cage to the side, with two women in it, an elf with an ethereal look about her, and a gnome. They huddled against the back of the cage, both just as naked as the first girl.

  Essaerae Reystina

  Feytouched Elf Female

  Level 40 Wildshaper (Druid) / Ranger

  Titles: Friend of the Wild, Faekissed

  Canki Fizzlebottom

  High Gnome Female

  Level 40 Flameblast Artificer (Artificer) / Rogue

  Titles: Genius, Insane Genius, Pyromaniac

  Around the clearing, there were screams and cries. Maybe ten other women had been captured, it seemed, and had already been passed around to the trolls. I figured killing those women would be a mercy. Well, I’d try to keep them alive, but I wasn’t going to risk my neck over it. Then I saw Kylana signaling. She was ready on her end.

  As I began my dive, a bolt of magic came flying past me. Instantly I saw the culprit. A female troll! Trolls were almost exclusively male. About one in fifty trolls was female. The downside of that is that the females were always far more intelligent, and were able to use magic. I needed to eliminate her, fast.

  I unleashed my hellfire breath, strafing the trolls as I flew over their heads, making sure to wash the breath over the female’s position. She was unharmed, thanks to a barrier she put up, but the flames did a number on the trolls around her. I rose, avoiding another blast of magic. As I turned, I saw a wall of hellfire spring up from the oil Kylana had conjured. The trolls, except for the female, were panicking now.

  Nithroel and Kylana joined me in the air, while Yukiko, Della, and Hrozne patrolled the edge of the fire, ensuring no escapes. Nithroel dove, and smashed the female troll with her warhammer, breaking her concentration, and doing a fair bit of damage, as well. Kylana followed it up with blasts of hellfire. Not as strong as mine, even in incubus form, but hers was a racial ability, while in incubus form it was based on my class. But against trolls, it was more than enough. The female fell down, dead, just as I finished strafing the last of the trolls outside.

  And that’s when the first roars of challenge came from the cave.

  Daemira Ravenhair

  Greater Succubus Female

  Level 40 Mindtwister (Enchantress) / Earth Sorceress

  Titles: Human Bane, Goblin Bane, Broken One

  Chief Bigstaff

  Demontroll Male

  Level 80 Battle Raper (Barbarian) / Wrathlord (Barbarian)

  Titles: Troll Bane, Violator, Human Bane, Elf Bane, Dwarf Bane, Orc Bane, Goblin Bane

  At the head of the ten remaining trolls, all of whom were wearing armor and had actual weapons, was the biggest troll I’d ever seen. Demontrolls are, as one might expect, trolls from the Abyss or Hells. They were very powerful, and, like Fire Trolls, traded their weakness against Fire for one against Ice. This group of demontrolls were probably the elite of the village, and had taken the time to gear up before coming out to challenge us. Oh, and the leader was still ‘wearing’ a succubus on his cock, which was probably painful as hell for her, since I could see the tip coming out of her mouth. But her regen must be enough to keep her alive… for the moment. Della would need to see to her soon, though.

  I landed in the clearing, the rest of the girls joining me. I looked to Severa when she and Kamla appeared next to me, and she simply said, “In the tent.” I nodded. So the only member of the party left was the succubus. I could work with that.

  “Ladies, and Hrozne, if you would be so kind as to eliminate the Chief’s
followers? I’m going to separate him from his hood ornament.” Drawing my blades, I pointed at the chief with Munsuraisa, and then walked to a clear area, kicking the smoldering corpse of the female troll as I did so. The troll took it for the challenge it was, and charged my way, just getting out of the range of the ice storm that came down on his men as Della began her assault. Another spell coated our weapons with an icy edge, allowing them to do additional cold damage. It was a mana intensive spell for the person we relied on as our healer, but for this fight, it would make all the difference.

  The troll may have almost thirty levels on me, but he had clearly neglected any of his stats besides STR and CON. I dodged out of the way of his first swing with his massive greatsword, and slashed out with my blades as I circled around him. The tendons in his ankles were cut, crippling him for a moment, dropping the troll to his knees. Another slice had the troll roaring in pain as the succubus fell to the ground, the troll’s severed ‘sword’ still sheathed inside her. That roar ended soon after, when I relieved him of his head.

  Chapter 80 – Black Rock Hold

  Flames of Vengeance

  The Trolls of Trollmoore have gone too far! Their attacks on humans and dwarves traveling the Tribeslands must end! Put these trolls out of everyone else’s misery.

  With massive use of hellfire and ice spells, you’ve wiped Trollmore off the map, and even managed to rescue some of their captives!

 

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