Every time she looked up from her plate, Nathan was looking at her, absentmindedly eating but totally focused on her. She met his deep blue eyes and didn’t feel at all self-conscious.
“It’s delicious.” Maybe that was true, but she was so lost in his gaze it hardly mattered what she was eating.
Dessert was chocolate cheesecake with fresh raspberries, so rich and delicious she savored every bite even though she was already full. Before she finished, Nathan stood and tapped his water glass, putting the attention of all the guests on them. Annie dropped her fork, unable to finish with so many people watching.
“On behalf of my father and me, thank you all for coming. He is really sorry he couldn’t be here, but I’ve been designated to act in his stead in giving out the golf awards.”
Annie had no idea what it took to get one of the little trophies a waiter brought to their table along with gift certificates for golfing items on sale in the pro shop. She didn’t even try to follow the banter about handicaps, waterholes, and missed putts, but Nathan’s poise, humor, and good nature held her spellbound.
“I have to work the room,” Nathan whispered to her as the black uniformed servers started clearing the tables.
He had to say a few words to all his clients, but he kept her by his side, taking her hand as they moved from group. When the small orchestra began playing on a riser at the far end of the room, he led her to the dance floor.
“You dance like an angel,” he said as she circled the floor in his arms.
“Only because you lead so well,” she said. “I have two left feet.”
“Don’t do that.” His voice was serious.
“Do what?”
“Put yourself down. You’re the most beautiful woman in the room, not to mention the sweetest and nicest. When I give you a compliment, I mean it.”
She didn’t know whether to argue or thank him. Instead she said nothing, letting herself enjoy every moment in his arms.
When other men cut in—which they did more often than she liked—he stepped away gracefully. Only his eyes betrayed his reluctance.
“How long does the party last?” she asked when everyone present went out onto a balcony to watch the sky light up with fireworks
“Until the last guest leaves, but that doesn’t mean we have to stay. I’ve done my duty. No one will miss us if we sneak off after the fireworks.”
Instead of following the crowd to the balcony, he took her hand and led her outside.
“There’s a bench in front of the pro shop. We can sit and watch—alone.”
When the sky lit up with a brilliant display of sparkling light, Annie became aware of a number people on a swell of ground to the right. The country club invited the whole town to come watch, and she vaguely remembered sitting there on a blanket when she was young and her father was still alive. It was a bittersweet moment, but Nathan’s arm around her shoulders was wonderful comfort.
“Let’s beat the crowd,” he said, taking her hand and leading her to his car as a huge patriotic display, red, white and blue, concluded the fireworks program.
When her eyes got used to darkness again, she looked up at the sky. The distant stars were every bit as beautiful as the fireworks, and she silently thanked God for this moment of perfect happiness.
“Did you have fun?” Nathan asked as he drove toward her house.
“Yes, I did. Thank you.”
“I’m the one who should thank you. You made a tedious obligation into an evening to be remembered.” His voice was soft and mellow, even a little dreamy.
“Your father should be proud of the way you handled the party.”
Nathan’s laugh sounded ironical. “He expects it.”
Annie had never been more reluctant to have an evening end. Nathan stopped in front of her house and released his seat belt, but he made no move to get out of the car.
“Annie.” He leaned toward her and gently put his hand on the back of her neck.
Slowly, ever so slowly, he moved closer.
She was transported to another world when his lips touched hers.
“You are so lovely,” he murmured, kissing her again until her lips melded with his in one perfect kiss.
Annie put her hands on his shoulders while they kissed again. She suspected all evening this would happen but unsure what it meant. Was Nathan only thanking her yet again? Did he routinely kiss his dates good night? Did he have a clue how she felt about him?
Tomorrow he’d just be one of her bosses again in a job she needed to buy her flower shop. Would he even remember this conclusion to the evening?
Doubt made her freeze up. She couldn’t share casual kisses with a man she secretly loved. In a sudden moment of panic, she backed away and threw open the car door, only vaguely aware of Nathan saying her name.
She sprinted toward her front door, but her mother’s golden slippers finally failed her. A heel came loose with an audible cracking noise, but rather than stop, she kicked it off and got to the porch with one shoe on and one shoe off.
When the door closed behind her, she didn’t look back to see whether he was following. The shoe could lie on the lawn until tomorrow. She’d gone from extreme happiness to painful doubt in only moments, and she didn’t know how she’d ever be able to face Nathan again.
Chapter 20
When Annie woke up early the next morning after a restless night of strange and quickly forgotten dreams, the first thing she did was hurry outside in her robe. It would be much easier to explain the broken heel on her mother’s shoe if it weren’t lying on the front lawn.
It was gone.
She checked behind bushes and in the street by the curb. The shoe was nowhere to be found.
Maybe a dog had carried it away. Or possibly an early-morning runner had spotted it lying in the light dew on the grass and put it on the porch as a kindness. But the shoe wasn’t on the porch, nor could she see it in their neighbor’s yards on either side.
There was only one other possibility, an embarrassing one. Maybe Nathan had followed her and picked it up.
After an uncomfortable breakfast with her mother who was eager for details about the party, Annie was deliberately slow about leaving. Hopefully Nathan would be gone when she got there. She had no idea what to say to him when the memory of their kisses was still so fresh.
She needn’t have worried.
When she joined Mattie at the kitchen table, she was quick to tell her Nathan was bogged down with work and had left early.
“Come see the plans for my house,” she said enthusiastically. “Are you still up for a trip to the mall after all your partying? I have my heart set on green towels for the bathroom, but not just any dull green. I want them the same shade as corn when it first pokes up through the earth.”
Annie’s heart went out to her. In spite of excitement about her new little house, Mattie still missed her Iowa farm and house. If she could recreate some of her memories in decorating her prefab, Annie was willing to shop anywhere with her.
For a woman who’d been through a tornado and suffered an injured ankle, Mattie had an amazing store of energy. They didn’t get back to the house until mid-afternoon, and Annie almost looked forward to the slower pace at the pancake house.
“Let’s have a glass of iced tea,” Mattie said as they returned loaded with packages.
“Sounds great.” Annie left the purchases on a table in the foyer and gratefully followed her to the kitchen.
When they were sitting across from each other and sipping Mattie’s favorite orange-spice tea, Mattie looked at her with a serious expression.
“We need to talk.”
Annie braced herself, sure she was no longer needed as a companion. Mattie could get along perfectly all right on her own now.
“I have a confession,” Mattie said. “I’ve succumbed to envy.”
“Oh?” Annie had no idea where this was going.
“I’ve envied my new friend Grace. She gets to spend time in that lovely
teashop, talk to people, and make new friends. Being old is so much nicer when a person can be helpful.”
Annie waited while Mattie sat very still, perhaps searching for a way to say what she wanted to say.
“I hope you don’t think I’ve been highhanded,” she said apologetically. “I didn’t want to bring this up until I was sure it was a possibility. As it is, I’ve been making Nathan work double time doing all my business.”
“What are you talking about?” Annie asked, on the edge of her chair expecting something bad.
“I’d like to be your partner in the flower shop.”
Annie’s mouth opened but no sound came out.
“I know this comes as a shock to you, but I can be an asset. I did the books for the farm for years, so you wouldn’t need to hire an accountant. And I’d love to work behind the counter a few hours a week like Grace does.”
“I don’t know what to say,” Annie managed to blurt out.
“Well, don’t say anything until you hear the rest. It would still be your business. Nathan and I have talked to the owners, Mr. and Mrs. Polk, and we think a thirty percent interest would be about right. It would cover the down payment, and I wouldn’t have any trouble co-signing a loan for the rest. You could use your savings as start-up money—and frankly, the place needs some sprucing up.”
“Why would you do this for me?”
“Oh, dear, you haven’t been listening. I’m doing it for me. I can’t abide the thought of sitting out the rest of my life, however many years the Lord gives me. And I know nothing about the flower business, so you’d still be the boss.”
“I have to think about it.” Annie was torn between seeing it as a wonderful opportunity and worrying Nathan was behind it, wanting to help her without seeming to.
“Of course, you do. I wouldn’t want a partner who leaped into things without mulling them over.”
“Do you mind if I leave now?” She had to thrash this out with some one whose advice she could trust: her grandfather.
“I know I’ve thrown a lot at you, but I didn’t want to say any thing until Nathan helped me work out the details. But don’t worry that Nathan is doing anything but giving me advice. I sold a three hundred acre farm when my Tom passed away, and the house was well insured. Call it my new hobby if it makes you feel better.”
“I’ll….” Annie stood, unsure whether to hug Mattie, cry, or run away. “I’ll get back to you.”
“Well, I’ll see you Monday. Nathan is taking me to see my cousin Mandy this weekend. She’s in a nursing home in Cleveland, so we’ll be staying over at a motel.”
When Annie stepped out of the cool interior of the Sawyer house, the sun was so hot she felt dizzy. Or maybe she just couldn’t take in everything Mattie had said to her. She had to sit in the car for a few minutes before she felt able to drive.
When she got home, her grandfather was in the kitchen shucking sweet corn for their dinner.
“I’m grilling tonight,” he said cheerfully. “Chicken kabobs with onions, mushrooms, and red peppers. They finally got some corn at the market, although it’s maybe too early to be at its best.”
“I don’t have time for dinner,” she said, her mind far from food.
“No, of course not. I’m going to send a plate with you to warm during your dinner break. They do have a microwave at that pancake place, don’t they?”
“Gramps, my so-called break is fifteen minutes, but I doubt I get that tonight. Since Marie quit, I’m training a new girl. It’s like working alone. She tries, but things come hard to her.”
This wasn’t the conversation she needed to have with her grandfather.
“I have to talk to you,” she said so urgently he gave her his full attention.
When she’d explained Mattie’s offer, she waited expectantly for his counsel.
“Sometimes the Lord work in mysterious ways.…”
“Yes, Gramps, but what should I DO?”
“Listen to your heart,” her grandfather said. “How do you feel about Mattie?”
“I’ve grown fond of her,” Annie admitted. “She can be gruff, but inside she’s a very good person.”
“So you could work with her?”
“Yes, but should I let her invest in my business? What if it fails and she loses her money? How could I live with that on my conscience.”
“It sounds like Mattie is willing to take a chance on you. Are you willing to take a chance on yourself?”
He smiled, but his answer told her what she needed to do: make her own decision. It also forced her to realize it wasn’t Mattie who was holding her back. She just wasn’t entirely sure Nathan wasn’t behind the idea. If there was any chance at all that this was his idea of charity, it was totally unacceptable.
“I have to get ready for work,” Annie said, avoiding an answer to her grandfather’s question.
Business was slow that evening, and customers were few and far between. It was fortunate because by the end of her shift she was making rookie mistakes: writing down a wrong order, dropping a plate of hash browns and eggs, and forgetting to check back at several tables.
“Where’s you head tonight?” her boss snapped at her.
For once he had a right to admonish her.
At least by the end of the evening, she knew what she had to do. She couldn’t accept Mattie’s offer without talking to Nathan. If it had been his idea, she absolutely couldn’t accept.
Instead of going home, she drove to the Sawyer house. Mattie went to bed early, so it was Nathan who answered the door when she rang.
“Annie!” He was still wearing his white dress shirt, but it looked rumpled with the top unbuttoned.
“Can I talk to you?”
“Sure, come in.” He stood aside to let her enter, but she shook her head.
“I don’t want to wake Mattie.”
“We can talk out here, I guess,” he said, leading her to the front step and sitting down beside her.
“It’s about Mattie becoming my partner,” she said, unsure how to approach the subject. “It took me by surprise.”
“I’ll be happy to answer any questions, but I left all the paperwork at the office.”
“You have paperwork already?” He made it sound like a done deal.
“Just a preliminary draft. It’s entirely up to you whether you want to go into a partnership. I know my aunt isn’t the easiest person in the world to get alone with.”
“It’s not that.” Was it all his idea? Maybe he was even behind the financing. Would a good attorney let his client risk retirement money on a long shot like a flower shop run by an inexperienced business woman?
Now that she had a chance to explain her reluctance, she didn’t know how to ask if the whole idea was his. He quietly explained the proposal, but he didn’t tell her anything Mattie hadn’t done already.
What if he’d only hired her because she was so pathetic, trying to save up to buy a well established business on her salary as a waitress? She stared down at the pavement in front of her and wished she were a little worm so she could wiggle out of sight in a crack. Maybe her dream had been too big and too impossible from the beginning.
“Tell you what,” Nathan said. “Think it over this week, and we can get together on Saturday to finalize it—but only if that’s what you want.”
“Saturday.” She tried to visualize her crowded calendar and remembered an obligation she’d almost forgotten.
“Saturday is the big community pancake breakfast. The church sponsors it three times a year to raise money to help neighbors in need. It represents a big donation to things like the food pantry. I’ve promised to help.”
“Don’t you see enough pancakes at your job?” His tone was quietly teasing.
“Why don’t you come help? They always need volunteers, especially in the summer when people go on vacations. I might have time to talk between cleaning up at church and going to my job.”
“I’m really not into that kind of volunteering. I have
too much to do for the firm, but I’ll be happy to donate to the effort. How about a check to cover the cost of supplies?”
“I’m sure the committee would appreciate anything you’d like to donate,” she said in a cool tone.
She wanted to tell him he couldn’t always buy his way out of giving of himself, but he was a Sawyer from the town’s wealthiest family. Would he even understand if she tried to explain?
She felt totally deflated. He didn’t have a clue what it meant to serve others in the Lord’s name. The gap between them seemed to widen, and it was only with difficulty she held back tears.
“You sound as if I did something wrong,” he said. “I only offered….”
“I know what you offered,” she said, standing to leave.
He stood in front of the house without saying anything. She knew there was nothing she could say to mend the rift between them. Nathan lived in a different world from hers, one where writing a check—or hiring a pathetic dreamer—substituted for giving of himself.
When she reached the privacy of her bedroom at home, she let tears roll down her cheeks. She had to sever all ties with the Sawyer family even though it meant the end of her hope for making enough money by Labor Day. Regretfully, it meant quitting as Mattie’s companion and not even considering a partnership with her.
Mattie had been forced to give up her independence when a tornado wrecked her long-time home. Maybe she would understand why Annie couldn’t give up her determination to do something on her own. More than flowers and profit, the flower shop represented a chance to prove she could accomplish something through her own efforts.
Was this hollow feeling the Lord’s way of reminding her that all things were possible through him, but without faith and prayer it would be an empty accomplishment? Was she letting pride get in the way of realizing her dream?
The one thing she’d never expected was falling in love with Nathan Sawyer. It was also the strongest reason not to accept his charity if he was behind the partnership offer, no matter how badly she wanted to be her own boss.
Her dream had turned to dust, and she’d never felt more alone.
Annie's Answer Page 14
