I tensed, confused by his words and stunned by the raw need that momentarily blazed in his eyes. I hadn’t seen that look in a long time. It took a few seconds before I could speak. All that came out was, “What?”
“I had to watch you with that human for seven months. Seven. Long. Fucking. Months. The only thing that stopped me from hurting him was that he made you happy. But then he didn’t, and now he’s gone. I decided to give you a month to get your head straight before I made a move. That time is now up.”
I shook my head. “I told you I was done with being a bed-buddy. I want—”
“More. A relationship. The problem is I’m not good for people. I don’t know how to make another person happy. That was why I let you go. And I’ve regretted it ever fucking since. I didn’t think I’d get another chance with you. But I have, and I’m taking it. You want a relationship? Fine. But I won’t be easy to deal with, Imani. Know that straight up. I’m aggressive and selfish, not to mention dangerously fucking possessive when it comes to you.”
He had to be kidding…but I knew he wasn’t. Butch was a direct person. He didn’t play games. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”
“Wouldn’t say it if I wasn’t.” He opened my NST and slid it to me. “Drink.”
Feeling a little dazed, I picked up the bottle. “Where is all this coming from?” It felt seriously shit. “You’ve never acted even remotely possessive.” Protective, sure, but that was different.
“Why do you think I almost snapped Leo’s spine?”
Leo was a member of the legion who I’d liked right up until he grabbed my ass and mentioned how much he’d like to fuck it. “It was you that beat the shit out of him?”
“He touched what wasn’t his to touch.”
I could only gape. This whole conversation was just…I mean…what the fuck? It had totally blindsided me. Seemed too bizarre to be true. I didn’t know how to process it, and I didn’t know how to feel about it.
He watched my throat work as I drank the NST. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“I’m thinking I need to go.”
His hand shot out and grabbed my wrist. “You know what I like about you, Imani? I don’t have to play guessing games with you. You let it all hang out. If you’re pissed, you show it. If you’re happy, you show it. If you’ve got something you want to say, you just say it. Right now, you’re closing down on me. Tell me what you’re thinking.”
I threw my empty bottle in the trash. “I find all this hard to believe.”
“You think I’m lying to you?”
I shrugged. “My mom always said that guys are like commercials—you can’t trust a single word they say.”
“I’m not lying, Imani.”
“Can you blame me for being doubtful? You made it clear eleven months ago that you didn’t want anything more than…”
“You beneath me,” he finished. “Back then, I didn’t. Things have changed.”
“What does that mean exactly?”
“It means that I want everything you are.”
(Butch)
I could see that my answer took her off-guard. It also spooked her. That was a smart reaction. Because I wouldn’t accept anything less than everything. And because, contrary to what little Imani Prince liked to think, I wasn’t a good guy. I was close to the sociopath that I’d long ago been branded. Yes, I was well aware of what people said about me. I didn’t care; that would require energy I could use on something else.
I’d been protective of her since the second she was brought to The Hollow. Limbs tight to her body and her hand at her throat, the pretty little doe-eyed female had regarded my entire squad with a wary gaze. She’d done her best to look calm and unafraid so that Paige would agree to leave her side and help the injured vampires around us. But it had been blindingly clear that Imani expected one of the squad to pounce on her.
Then she’d looked right up at me. Even as a human, people were wary of me. ‘It’s something about your eyes,’ so many had said. I’d heard my eyes be described as eerie, dead, and empty. I used to spook the shit out of my teachers as a kid, which had been pretty entertaining.
Yet, Imani’s first words to me had been: ‘Your eyes are really dark. I have total eye colour envy right now.’ And I’d sworn I wouldn’t let a damn thing happen to this female who looked at me with absolutely no fear. She was the only person who seemed to think I was normal. Or maybe she just didn’t care that I wasn’t.
I’d watched her closely, looked out for her on assignments. And I’d eventually acted on the unrelenting urge to take and claim; to live out the fantasy of her little body wrapped around me while I pounded in and out of her. She was all wicked curves and smooth muscle, and there wasn’t a single inch of her that I hadn’t tasted.
There was something transfixing about her; in the way she carried herself with confidence and poise. In some ways, she made me think of a cat. She was graceful. Curious. Independent. So easy-going she often came across as aloof to those who didn’t know her. Not to mention that she could fall asleep just about anywhere. And then there was that condescending look she’d mastered. Perversely, when she jutted her chin and gave me that haughty attitude, I wanted nothing more than to bend her over and fuck her raw.
What appealed to me most about her was the quiet strength that stamped her as a survivor. Not just a survivor, a fighter.
She thought I didn’t know her. She was wrong. I’d watched her grow and toughen since joining the legion. I’d seen her at her weakest, seen her at her strongest, and seen her at her most dangerous. I both admired and respected Imani Prince.
I’d spent the entire time we’d been sleeping together telling myself I didn’t want more. I’d spent the time since then realising that I did. I just didn’t have much to give her. But I couldn’t stay away. She was an addiction I couldn’t shake. A dangerous obsession that wouldn’t fade. She was...important.
“Everything I am?” she echoed.
Slowly rounding the breakfast bar, I stalked toward her. Tensing slightly, she turned to face me—head up, back straight, and eyes boldly on mine. So fucking strong. I brushed my thumb over her pulse. “I’ve missed the taste of you.” Sweet and tangy. “Missed being in you.” Missed her blood flowing into my mouth while her body tightened around my cock.
“Butch—”
“I’ll have that again. Because when I say everything you are, I mean exactly that. Your blood, your mind, your body, your soul—everything.” I buried my hand in her silky long hair; it was just a few shades darker than her hazelnut brown eyes. It always smelled like vanilla, and it perfectly complemented her unique scent of strawberries and cream—a scent that seemed to have embedded itself in my lungs, just as her taste seemed embedded on my tongue.
When I’d watched her walk out of my apartment the last time we were together, knowing that she’d never be back, it had felt like a punch to the solar plexus. Back then, I hadn’t understood why it hurt. Not until I saw her with Dean.
The jealousy hadn’t come as a surprise, considering the possessiveness that I hadn’t been able to shake off. But the pain...I hadn’t expected that. My stomach had rolled whenever I saw them together. Each time she’d smiled up at him or laughed at something he’d said, an ache built in my chest. That ache had gotten worse the longer they were together.
So many times I’d come close to punching the prick—especially when he shot me one of those smug smirks. He’d seen the way I looked at her, and he’d known he had what I wanted most. And he’d loved that. Got a kick out of it.
The only thing that had held me back was that he was good to Imani. He’d treated her well, and he’d seemed to care for her. That was why his betrayal had come as such a shock to everyone. But some people were just weak against temptation, and some took what they had for granted. Maybe that was why Dean had fucked her over. I didn’t know.
The first thing I’d done was beat him to a pulp for hurting her.
The second thing I’d done
was decide that I’d somehow get her back. This time, I wouldn’t let her go. I’d take this second chance with her, and I’d make it work. Nothing would get in my way—not Imani’s doubts, not my issues with relationships, and definitely not Dean.
“Is the prick trying to win you back?” I rumbled.
“He has a name, you know.”
“Don’t care. He had what I craved every fucking day and night. That makes him a prick.”
Flushing, she briefly averted her gaze. “The constant cravings…They’re not real. It’s the Keja allure that makes you feel that way—it keeps our prey coming back again and again. It’s probably what caused your jealousy and possessiveness too.”
I gave a slow shake of the head. There were plenty of her breed around The Hollow; I’d learned to withstand the Keja allure a long time ago. “If that was the case…” I put her hand over my cock. It was so painfully hard, I could hammer nails with it. “This would happen every time I was around Paige, too.”
Lips flattening, Imani made a feral noise in the back of her throat. She snatched her hand free and folded her arms over her chest.
“If he does contact you, be sure to tell him how things are with you and me.”
She sighed, looking sad and weary all of a sudden. “You don’t want a relationship, Butch. Not really. If you feel possessive and jealous, it’s because of the Keja allure. The cravings will fade, they always do.”
Speaking softly, I smoothed her hair between my fingers. “Ah, baby, you’re not listening to me. I fucked up before. I let you go. That’s not happening again. Get used to it. Learn to like it. We’re gonna do ‘more,’ and we’re gonna make it work.” There was no other acceptable option for me.
Her spine snapped straight and her chin lifted at the command in my tone. I should have remembered she lost her easy-going temperament when anyone pushed her.
“Is that so?” She backed away, irises flaring slightly. “It’s been almost a year, Butch. You didn’t want me. Not badly enough to try a relationship. I wasn’t mad at you for that. I don’t think it’s fair to be upset with someone for what they do or don’t feel. So I accepted it. I wasn’t a bitch to you. I didn’t let any of it bleed over onto our working relationship.”
No, she hadn’t. It was something that I’d appreciated.
“I accepted that I wasn’t enough for you that you’d push yourself out of your comfort zone, and I moved on. Moved on, Butch. You can’t come to me now and expect me to just fall right in line because you’ve decided that, hey, you’ve changed your mind.”
“I can. And I just did. As for you not being enough for me? That’s total shit, Imani. I never once thought that. I never once felt that way.”
“Yet, you weren’t prepared to try a relationship until another guy entered the picture. How typical.”
I closed the distance between us. “Typical? Typical would have been for me to try and come between you out of jealousy and because I’m that fucking selfish. Don’t think I didn’t consider it. I did. But I have too much respect for you to fuck with your head like that.”
“This is fucking with my head.”
Because she was too shocked to process it, I realised. I probably should have anticipated that. Forcing myself to take a step back, I said, “If you need some time to wrap your head around everything I’ve said and accept what I want from you, take it. Three nights, baby.” That was the most I could give her. “Three nights. Then I’m coming for you, and we’ll continue this conversation and lay everything out. But don’t make the mistake of thinking those three nights include freedom. You’re mine. That’s the way it is, and that’s the way it’s gonna stay.”
CHAPTER THREE
(Imani)
Meetings always took place in the main building of the gated community. It was a huge mansion that had once been solely Antonio’s home. Although he’d offered it to Sam and Jared when he stepped down from his position, the pair declined. In their minds, it was too much Antonio’s home. They felt it wouldn’t feel right to ask him to move.
As such, Antonio built them a beach house and divided the mansion into two sections. Half was his ‘living quarters’, which he shared with his mate. The other half was work space for Sam and Jared, including an office and several conference rooms. Antonio’s opinion was that their space should be in the centre of the community to place significance on their role and status.
Entering the building, I passed Sam and Jared’s office. Their personal assistant, Fletcher, paused in his typing and peered at me over his spectacles. “You’re a broth of emotions this evening.” Like Sam, the Brit had a strong London accent. He was also an Empath. “Frustrated. Anxious. A little dazed.”
Well, yeah. Feeling exposed, I fought a blush. “Good evening to you too,” I said, pressing the number for the elevator.
“Does this have anything to do with Dean? I hope not. You can do better.”
I’d figured that out when I heard he’d let another vampire drink from him. Biting was very intimate for my kind. His act was a form of cheating. And Dean knew it. “How’s Norm?” I asked, referring to Fletcher’s adorable boyfriend.
“Annoyed and upset that you missed two movie nights in a row. But he’ll forgive you, because he loves you.”
I smiled, stepping into the empty elevator. “See you later.”
The conference room was only half-full when I entered. Noticing that Butch wasn’t yet present, I greeted everyone before taking the seat between Paige and Denny, who had the cutest baby face.
I chatted with the people around me, but my mind was on Butch. I was still having trouble accepting the things he’d said. It all still seemed much too surreal. It had to be the Keja allure messing with his mind and playing his body. Had to be.
‘I had to watch you with that human for seven months. Seven. Long. Fucking. Months. The only thing that stopped me from hurting him was that he made you happy.’
The words had rang with a pain I wouldn’t have expected. A pain that suggested this was about more than just cravings. A pain he hadn’t acted on because he’d wanted me to be happy. But it was also a pain that I’d never once sensed. Wouldn’t I have noticed it if it was truly there?
Maybe. Maybe not. Butch was emotionally stoic and very good at projecting an outward calm. I had the feeling that he hid a lot behind that calm, but I didn’t know him well enough to be sure.
Still, did I want to try a relationship with him? A part of me did—the same part that wanted to believe he wasn’t simply roped in by the Keja allure. It was probably a bad idea, given that he was very distant and detached. But he had a lot of good points; he was loyal, trustworthy, and he always had my back. Even when I’d been with Dean, Butch had never been any less protective or supportive. And if he genuinely had found it hard to watch me with someone else, he’d never taken that pain out on me.
However, I wasn’t at all comfortable with giving him everything that I was. Not at all. There was knowing someone, and there was knowing someone. I didn’t know Butch well enough to put my soul in the palm of his hand like that. I trusted him with my life, but not with everything. I couldn’t give him what he wanted.
Since he wasn’t the type to take no for an answer, I doubted he would accept that. He wouldn’t behave, tip his hat, and walk away if this was truly important to him. And if he did accept that answer and walk away, well I’d know that I still wasn’t enough for him. That thought kind of depressed me.
Paige nudged me. “Cheer up, sunshine.”
I forced a smile. “I’m just tired.”
“Hasn’t the induced sleep completely worn off yet?” asked Alora, her expression thoughtful. “It struck you fast. One second, you were struggling like a wildcat. The next thing, you were limp in Butch’s arms.”
“I tried to take you,” said Paige, “but he wouldn’t have any of it. He said he’d take you home himself.”
Did he now? “He took me to his apartment.”
Alora’s lips pressed together. “
You promised yourself you wouldn’t—”
I raised a hand. “Nothing happened.” I didn’t tell them any of the things he’d said because I knew what their advice would be: ‘Stay clear of Butch.’
It wasn’t that my squad didn’t like him. They just didn’t like that he’d let me go. Sweethearts that they were, they wanted me to be with a guy who’d treat me right. As far as they were concerned, Butch had treated me as nothing more than a fuck toy and he didn’t deserve me. I’d insisted that it wasn’t like that, and I’d tried to explain that connecting with others was simply difficult for him. That hadn’t appeased them at all.
They would see me trying a relationship with Butch as a definite route to Heartbreak Avenue. As such, I couldn’t rely on them to give me unbiased advice. I also couldn’t rely on them not to pull Butch’s squad into it. The guys hadn’t been happy with Butch’s behaviour either, since they were protective of me and the girls. They wouldn’t approve of me being with him, and they would be seriously pissed at him for even suggesting that we try a relationship. So, yeah, I was on my own with this one.
A familiar giggle made me look to the door. Ava was skipping inside with her mate, Salem. They were total opposites. The tiny brunette was sweet, bubbly, and high on life. He was a grunting, growling, surly male who didn’t seem to smile for anyone other than Ava. Yet, they suited each other perfectly.
That was what I wanted. A mate who took me as I was. Something deep and real. I wasn’t sure that Butch could truly give me that, no matter what he said.
Ava gave us a cheery smile. “Evening, people.” She took the seat next to Alora. The two females had become quite close, and I suspected it was because they were both often underestimated by people—Ava because she was cute and bubbly; Alora because she had a very hippy-like look and quirky attitude.
Alora’s partner, Evan, was Jared’s twin brother, a commander within the legion, and also Sam and Jared’s appointed Heir. That meant he would replace them when they were ready to step down—probably with Alora at his side, since Evan had no intention of letting her go.
Fractured (The Deep in Your Veins Series Book 5) Page 2
