by Mlyn Hurn
Julie looked down at her fingers playing nervously with the fringe of her shawl. “I’m not in the wedding, Jim.”
“But Tony said Angie wanted you to be her maid of honor, all that was needed was the final fitting on the dress.” Jim took in her face, wondering why she had that damn shawl pulled up like that. And then he noticed that she had circles under her eyes and her face appeared quite a bit thinner. He reached out and grabbed her shoulders, turning her toward him abruptly.
Julie gasped in surprise and her shawl fell to the ground. Jim stared at her eyes for a long time, and then noticed how prominent her cheekbones were now. Then he noticed her hair. It was short! He reached up to touch the short ends that curled around her face a little. His hand moved back and felt for the long hair that he loved to touch. It was quite short, in fact, ending at her nape.
* * * * *
Julie looked away from his eyes, one hand going up to nervously touch her hair. “It was my aunt’s idea. It was all the rage in Paris.” She had hated it the moment it was done, and it had grown about half an inch in the two months since her return. She stopped talking as his fingertips traced the bluish circles under her eyes. His hand moved down to trace her collarbone, which was also quite prominent.
“Is it because of the hair that you don’t want to be in the wedding? No one will care, honey.” Jim moved his fingers back up, touching the silky soft hair. One strand curled immediately around his finger. “God! You will still be the most beautiful woman there. My eyes won’t see anything but you.”
But Julie shook her head in denial. Her voice was so soft when she did finally answer that he had to lean closer.
“The dress couldn’t be altered enough to fit.”
“Julie, you look like you’ve lost weight—”
His words faded as he finally looked down, beyond her face and shoulders. There was no hiding the bulge of her tummy. She was pregnant. Quite pregnant from the look of her rounded belly. He dropped his hands from her arms abruptly.
“How far—”
Julie glanced up into his intense gaze. “Almost five months exactly. It had to have been that first day, at your house. That was the only time we weren’t cautious…well, I guess we weren’t careful enough, or I wouldn’t be—” She gestured toward her belly with a small sweep of her hand.
Jim nodded slowly, his eyes still glued to her rounded tummy. He wanted to touch her, but something held him back. They had usually been careful, other than the very first time, and then again when he had taken her at his house, and then later in the garden. He didn’t want to force any decisions upon her, and he had known that pregnancy would force her to decide permanently.
“What did your family say?” Jim turned to glance at her down-turned face, and then looked back out toward the water.
“Hmmm, other than Nick wanting to head out with his shotgun last night, they were all very supportive of me.” She looked over at Jim, a small smile curving her lips. “Of course, he had no idea who he needed to shoot, but he was willing to gun the bastard down.”
Jim saw the smile on her face. “You don’t think anyone has guessed?”
“Well, no one said anything.”
Jim frowned at her, sure that the “news” was not taken as quietly as Julie was intimating that it was. He knew Nick; in fact, he was fairly familiar with all of her brothers. Somehow he was sure there was a lot of mental “arm twisting” to get her to say who the father was.
“So, honey, now what?”
Suddenly there was a sound behind them. They turned and saw that Tony was riding toward them. Jim noticed out of the corner of his eye that Julie picked up her shawl and wrapped it around herself before his brother got very close. Jim rose to greet his brother.
Tony pulled his horse up as he neared them. “I see you escaped, brother.”
Jim laughed. “It seemed like the best way to handle things.”
Tony tilted his hat to Julie. “I’m glad you could make it home for the wedding, Julie.”
Julie smiled, but didn’t stand. When Jim looked down at her, she was nervously plucking at the fringe and rearranging the material so it didn’t drape over anything.
“I’ve been sent to fetch you back home, Jim. Mother is demanding your presence. She isn’t satisfied with having Dad, me and everyone else to boss around. She wants you there, too.”
Jim nodded. “All right. You go on and I’ll follow in a minute.”
Julie thought Jim was afraid Tony might wonder about their being there alone in the first place. “No, Jim. You go on. I’ll be fine.”
Tony looked from his brother’s face to his future sister-in-law’s. “Are you all right, Julie? It’s good that you got back in time for the wedding.”
Jim glanced quickly at Tony, hoping he had not picked up the tension between Julie and himself. Something in the way his younger brother’s eyes moved back and forth told him his mind was racing.
“I’m glad to be here, Tony. I would hate it if I missed my only sister’s wedding.”
Tony grinned, pausing to calm his skittish horse. “Maybe you will change your mind this time and join Angie and myself in a double ceremony, heh?”
Jim flushed in anger, remembering how Frank Fitzhugh had kept touching Julie at every opportunity. He opened his mouth to deny Tony’s words, but Julie was already replying.
“You would have to find someone for me to marry. I keep waiting for Jim to ask me…” her voice trailed away.
Jim jerked his head around, quite sure the shock he felt at hearing her words was apparent on his face. He could not believe that the words had come out of Julie Bradley’s mouth. Maybe this was an imposter?
“Good one, Julie! Like that will happen in this lifetime. Come on, Jim. Mother will skin me alive if I don’t get you back there now!”
Jim finally nodded his head, replaced his hat and then walked back to his horse. Tony said he would see her later, and turned his horse to follow Jim.
* * * * *
Julie sat watching as the two brothers rode away. After they disappeared from view, she slapped her forehead with her palm.
“Stupid, stupid and more stupid! Did you turn your brain off?” she admonished herself out loud. There was no one to tell her yea or nay, though.
Finally she lay back on the grass, knowing that wishing wouldn’t make it so. Obviously her subconscious had made itself known with those few words to Tony. Hopefully he would assume she was kidding and take into account their tumultuous history. If Jim had no intention of marrying her, then her options were limited to living quietly with her great-aunt in San Francisco, or move to Europe and pretend to be a widow.
The last option would spare her family embarrassment, but her heart ached to face the possibility that she might never see any of them again. Her baby would come into the world without a father and grow up never knowing his or her cousins.
For the first time in a very long time, she acknowledged what she had missed by staying away so long. Her family had been close-knit, and that had continued without her. It hurt to feel like the outsider no matter how much they might try to fit her in. She didn’t live here, nor was she a part of their daily lives. No doubt it was all her fault. She had let her fears chase her away.
Of course, she was older now and had traveled the world. She had seen many things, impressive and sad. One thing about traveling with her great-aunt…she never shielded herself from the realities of the places they went to. Julie may have seen opulent palaces, but she had also witnessed starving children. With her aunt, they donated money, food and clothing.
Julie rubbed her hand over her swollen belly. Her child might never suffer hunger, but she didn’t want the child to be labeled, either. Soon she got up and returned home.
* * * * *
As the time drew near for the party, Jim’s house was ablaze with lights and was decorated to the hilt. He and his father and brothers had all been reviewed by Phyllis to make sure their suits “passed inspection.” Now, Jim wa
s drinking some very fine bourbon, watching the door for the Bradleys to arrive. He had not wanted to leave Julie that afternoon. He’d had a funny feeling that something else was wrong—as if her being pregnant wasn’t enough—yet he still couldn’t put his finger on what it was. Suddenly, there was a commotion at the doorway. Jim saw Angie coming through the door and being hugged first by Tony, and then by her future mother-in-law.
Jim walked through the crowd to greet his newest guests. His eyes scanned the faces of his friends, and he quickly realized that Julie wasn’t with them. Before he could ask, Tony asked Angie.
“Where is Julie? I told her I would see her tonight, and she didn’t say she wasn’t coming.”
Angie blushed brightly, and for a moment none of the Bradleys spoke. It was a very telling silence. Victoria answered him, though.
“Julie is still feeling tired from traveling down from San Francisco. She decided to stay home and rest up for tomorrow.”
Everyone seemed to accept her explanation, except for Jim. He was sure she was hiding to avoid announcing her pregnancy to the world. He turned to lead everyone back into the living room, when he saw Nick was just staring at him. From that point on, though, the party was in full swing.
Twice, Jim tried to escape the crowd. He was going to go over to Julie and talk to her. He wanted her to face a few facts and for the two of them to come to some decisions. Tonight. His mother caught him the first time, making sure he had at least two or three things to do for her. The second time, he got as far as the barn. He had his horse saddled when he heard a noise coming from the open doors. Jim turned and saw Nick standing behind him. Nick was leaning against one of the rails, his arms crossed. The two men, who had been friends for most of their lives, just looked at one another for a long time.
Nick finally moved away from the rail. “You know, at first I just refused to believe it. I thought ‘no way!’ You two had always been fire and ice…and then I thought fire melts ice. Just one question, my friend. How long?”
Jim didn’t bother denying or pretending he didn’t know what Nick was talking about. “Since Gerry’s wedding.”
Nick took an angry step forward. “I am so close to knocking you down right now.”
Jim looped the reins over the rail and took a step forward. “Nick, I understand how you are feeling—”
Nick laughed harshly. “I find out my best friend has been…with my sister—for over a year, no less—and you have the gall to say you understand?”
“Let’s go get a drink and we’ll sit down and talk, okay, Nick?”
Nick glared at Jim. “Were you planning to go to my mother’s house while the rest of us were partying here, unaware—”
“I needed to talk to Julie. We have a lot to discuss, as I’m sure you can understand.”
Nick shook his head. “There is only one decision to be made and that is when will the wedding be?”
“Tomorrow would work for me,” Jim answered him softly. Nick looked at him, surprised. “The problem will be convincing your sister, Nick.”
Nick shook his head. “No problem. She has no choice.”
Jim laughed. “Julie is too headstrong for that approach to work, Nick.”
Nick paused, and then nodded his head in agreement. “Did she write to you, telling you about the baby? How did you know?”
Jim moved over to sit down on one of the bales of hay. “She kept herself well hidden when I picked her up at the train station. It wasn’t until this afternoon, actually. I found her by accident near the pond. Otherwise, I doubt I would have found out.”
Nick nodded, moving over to sit on a nearby bale of hay. “The last thing I knew you two still hated each other.”
Jim looked up from his clasped hands. “Nick, I never hated Julie. I think I was always attracted to her. But she was always so antagonistic toward me, and it was hard to know what was going on inside of her.”
Nick shrugged. “I don’t pretend to understand how this came about. I also won’t deny that I always wanted you to fall for my sister, but I thought it would never really happen. Then my father screwed it all up with that codicil to his will. Why didn’t you just come out with it? Let everyone know how you felt—”
Jim laughed bitterly. “You have seen how my mother is around Julie. Even the mention of her name sets her off. Personally, I don’t care what she thinks, but I could tell that Julie didn’t want to make things worse. And I don’t think she ever really thought beyond the moment. I didn’t think ahead either, Nick.” He laughed ruefully. “For me, Julie’s attraction to me was having my dream come true. It is usually the man who wants to keep a relationship secret, but not in this case.” He stood up. “I’m going over to your house to talk to her. She will not be leaving this time.”
* * * * *
Jim walked over and mounted his horse. Nick watched his lifelong best friend ride out of the barn and into the dark night. He would like to see the confrontation that was probably going to occur at his house in about fifteen minutes. But he turned instead and walked back to the house, trying to think of a good reason to explain Jim’s absence from the party.
Chapter 7
As Jim approached the house, he could see it was almost in total darkness. There was just one light, and he knew that it was coming from Julie’s bedroom. They never kept the doors locked, so he easily walked through the front door and up the wide staircase. He moved quietly to her bedroom door. He slowly turned the handle, not wanting to scare or startle her.
Julie was sitting up in her bed, reading by the lone light in the room. She looked so lovely to him, dressed in a simple nightgown with a light shawl around her shoulders. Her head was bent over her book and he could see her long, slim neck. He admitted her short hair was rather sexy and he could get used to it, he thought to himself as he watched her turn a page of the book.
* * * * *
Julie never knew what alerted her, but suddenly she looked up. Somehow, she wasn’t really surprised to see Jim standing in the open doorway of her bedroom. Maybe she had known subconsciously that he would come here when she didn’t show up at the party. She took a deep breath, slowly setting her book down.
Jim watched her in silence, and then stepped into the room. He paused to turn and lock the bedroom door.
“There is no need to lock the door, Jim. Everyone is gone, even the servants. I went down after everyone left and made sure the front door was not locked.”
Jim shrugged off his suit jacket and undid his silk tie at his throat, tossing both onto a nearby chair. He couldn’t help but smile a little as he started unbuttoning his shirt. Stopping short of removing it completely, he seated himself on the bed next to her. “You were expecting someone then?”
Julie laughed. “Someone, Jim? Looking like this! Not someone. You. Just you.”
They watched each other in silence, both weighing and considering the other person’s words. Jim finally nodded and answered her. “You were so sure I would come for you?” He raised one hand to lightly stroke his fingers down the side of her face. It didn’t seem to matter how long they were apart. It was always the same for him with the compulsion to touch her, to be a part of her warmth, her passionate spirit.
Julie didn’t pull away from him, but instead turned her head into his touch. “No, Jim. Not after this afternoon. I didn’t think you would escape into the night after you discovered the truth. But I wasn’t sure you would still want me.”
Jim stared into her eyes for the longest moment, surprised that she would think he could ever not want her. He had only to be within sight of her to want her. He only had to know she was in the vicinity to want her. Before he could answer her, though, Julie turned away from him.
“I am not exactly a raving beauty anymore. I have become awkward, bumping into things. I haven’t been able to eat right, and I know my face shows my sleepless nights. I may never have the figure I once did, no matter what I do…so, no, I was not sure you would come to me tonight.”
Jim
moved closer to her, turning her back to face him. He caressed her face with both hands, and then leaned slowly forward, placing a light, gentle kiss on her lips. “Julie, I want you. And while you might not believe me yet, I want you even more than I did five month ago.”
For a long moment, she stared back at him. He knew she was trying to find the truth in his face. Then she flung herself forward against his chest, hugging him close. “Make love to me, please.”
Jim heard her softly spoken request, muffled against his chest. “God, baby, you don’t need to ask me. Making love to you has been the only thing on my mind since this afternoon.” He paused to kiss her deeply, parting her lips. “If Tony hadn’t shown up—”
Julie laughed softly, her hands eagerly pushing his shirt back off his shoulders. “I think I went there unconsciously this afternoon, half hoping you would come along and find me as well.”
“Ten minutes later and Tony would have discovered me coming in more ways than the obvious!”
As Julie blushed and then laughed, Jim jerked his shirt off the rest of the way. Seeing the flaming color across her cheeks, he remembered her reaction when he had explained the double meaning. As he bent to remove his boots, he considered teasing her about it again. Shaking his head, he quickly shucked his pants. It took less than a second for him to join her on the bed again, pressing her back against the covers. He wasn’t delaying one more second—
“God, Julie! It has been so long, honey.” His hands unfastened her nightgown and pushed it down off her shoulders, slowly revealing her full bosoms. He slowly took in the changes the pregnancy had made to her lovely round breasts. He stopped to run his hand around each sensitive nipple, enjoying the way they pearled up quickly and tautly. He lowered his head to lick her nearest nipple, teasing her with flicks of his hot, wet tongue. When Julie moved her hand to the back of his head, he sucked her inside his mouth.
