by Natalie Erin
“Why?”
“She knew about my strange dreams. She told me I was your portal, and you were my skygazer, whatever that means. She was convinced it was my destiny to follow you.”
“I’m not so sure I believe in destiny,” Midnightstar confessed.
“Why?” Xiuh asked in shock. “Isn’t that what this trip is about?”
“Not really. The prophecies that have been foretold about us doesn’t set anything in stone. You might be the clouddrifter the prophecy speaks of, but we’re still not sure what that means. Even though I’ve seen the way things have played out since Allie and Kennu spoke the oracle, I believe that we choose our own path,” Midnightstar said.
“Then I choose going with you. Like I said, I have nowhere else to go. I might as well be making use of my time by helping to stop all this carnage rather than sitting on my scales all day in a cave, wondering when my next meal is going to come around.”
“I suppose I agree.”
Her attitude towards him was so icy, she was surprised he didn’t move away. Midnightstar felt bad she was treating him so harshly. Even so, she couldn’t afford to make friends on this trip. This was business. No time to be making small talk with somebody who potentially wouldn’t come back.
She tried focusing on the scenery in order to make a defense against slipping back into her mind. All the snow was gone now. Allie and Kennu wouldn’t be Changer sledding anymore. They’d be appreciating the beautiful blossoms that were blooming on each tree, the tiny buds that emerged, next to the first fruits of spring, and birds nesting in the trees. They would be racing each other through the flowers that were springing up on the plains. The smell of fresh spring grass would be in the air.
She sorely missed the Verinian. Here wasn’t home, but if she imagined it, she could pretend it was. The small dirt path was gentle to the touch underneath her feet as new green leaves waved in the breeze.
Midnightstar focused all her energy on remembering the beauty of this simple place. If her friends discovered her insanity and chased her away, she would never be allowed to reenter the safety of a pack again. Maybe then, if she was alone, she’d be so crazy her visions would carry her back to here again. Then, she guessed, it wouldn’t matter if she was a raving lunatic. As long as she completed the task at hand.
“Tatl is taking an awfully long time. Do you want me to go looking for him?” Xiuh asked.
“No, Xiuh. I don’t want you going alone,” Midnighstar said.
“Don’t you trust dragons?” Xiuhcoatl asked, stomping his foot.
Midnightstar clenched her fangs. “It isn’t a question of trusting you, it’s a question of trusting them.”
At her word, a lone howl rose up out of the woods. It was a high pitched, terrible scream, nothing like the beautiful cries the wolves called out to the moon each night. “Ortusans. They’re everywhere.”
“If you really wanted to do something we could go and slaughter all those posers,” Rabika complained.
“To kill Ortusans, you need wolves,” Midnightstar replied. “We won’t have any more wolves if the unicorns kill them all. First things first.”
“Oh Midnightstar!” a voice cried in the wilderness, and Adelaide cheered. She turned to watch a young black wolf trounce over the hill and down to meet them, wagging his tail.
“Hello, Tatl.” Midnightstar grimaced. “Find anything of worth?”
Tatl nodded, the white, tear-shaped shape mark on his head bobbing. “Only one thing,” he said. “Stay sharp, and keep your head down and your trap shut. Follow me.”
The wolves slunk down into a crouch, copying Tatl’s movements. Xiuh zipped into the trees to wind quietly after them.
“Ouch!” Adelaide whimpered, falling into Midnightstar. “I got pricked by this bush!”
“Quiet!” Tatl ordered. “Look down.”
Midnightstar peered over the thorny bushes they were concealing themselves behind to see a pack of thirty Ortusans, some in wolf form, others not. Most had blood covering them from head to toe, and were arguing over leftover scraps and bones. Midnightstar wrinkled her nose as she smelled their reek. Ortusans were such filthy things.
“How does this help us?” Rabika asked angrily, showing her teeth.
“It doesn’t. I just thought you’d like to know that we’re being hunted,” Tatl said.
“As if we didn’t know that already,” Midnightstar said.
“No, I mean, if they catch scent of us unprepared, we’re dead,” he added. “I’ve been spying on them for over an hour. They’ve cleaned all the food out of the area. We’re going hungry tonight, and they are too, if we can manage to avoid them.”
“No dinner again?” Adelaide complained. Rabika put her ears back at her, and the young wolf shrunk.
Midnightstar’s eyes swept back to her cohorts. “Come on. We’ve got to keep moving, and faster than we were.”
“Would you like me to burn them, Midnightstar?” Xiuh whispered from above, only his eyes visible amongst the leaves.
“Yeah, that’s a great idea! Torch em!” Tatl encouraged.
“No!” she snapped. “You do that, they’ll all be on us. There’s too many to kill right now.”
“You’re playing it safe. They don’t know we’re here. We have the perfect opportunity!” Tatl hushed back.
“It’s too risky.”
“Do it anyway, Xiuh,” Rabika encouraged.
“If you even think about it I’ll make Adelaide scream!” Midnightstar threatened, and she rose up a paw to step on Adelaide’s tail. The young red instantly held her breath, closing her eyes but doing nothing to move her tail out of Midnightstar’s way.
Rabika and Tatl glared immensely, but before another word could be said Xiuh had slipped away from the treetops, murmuring, “Another time.”
“Good job on making the dragon mad,” Rabika snarled.
“He’s not mad,” Midnightstar said, and she knew she was right. “He’s being sensible.”
“It’ll be his sensibility, and yours,” Tatl said as he wrangled his way out of the bush, “That’ll make us all dinner tonight.”
Chapter Two
Identity
The group wandered about, always moving forward and never looking back. Midnightstar led the charge, the others staying close behind now that they knew of the threat that was following. Xiuh hadn’t showed himself since Midnightstar snapped at him, and she couldn’t help but think it was for the best. The less time he spent close to the wolves, the less likely he was to tell them about the visions.
“I’m so hungry.” Adelaide moaned, tripping over herself as she walked along.
“Stop whining, Adelaide.” Rabika snapped. “You complaining won’t make food magically appear.”
“I never said it would!” Adelaide moaned. “I’m just saying I’m really hungry!”
“Well, maybe if you didn’t whine about it so much, you wouldn’t be so hungry,” Rabika growled.
“Come on you two, let’s not fight,” Tatl ordered. “All we have is each other.”
Midnightstar listened to them a moment, but then another voice filled her mind, unwelcome and commanding.
Go, Midnightstar, it whispered. You are the last, you must go. This life means nothing. You are a wave tossed into the ocean, lost and never found. This war is like another grain of sand on an ocean floor. It will be tossed and forgotten with the next tide.
Stop it! Midnightstar shook her head. Why do you tell me these things? Why can’t you just leave me alone?
You are the last. Only you can save them. You must save them, before they are tossed into the wind and lost forever. Remember them, save them. You are the last. The voice continued to repeat the words, chanting them over and over.
“The last what!” Midnightstar shouted. “Tell me!”
“Who are you talking to? The voices in your head?” Rabika asked sarcastically.
“No! That would be crazy!” Midnightstar snapped. “Don’t be ridiculous. I wasn’t tal
king to anyone.”
“Yes, you were, I heard you,” Rabika argued.
“You must be hearing things, then, because I didn’t say a word,” Midnightstar growled.
“Whatever you say.” Rabika stared at the other wolf a moment longer, then allowed herself to fall a few paces behind. In the trees, Xiuh’s chuckle could be heard faintly.
Midnightstar ran along the river, her feet sinking so far into the sand that she shouldn’t have been able to pull them out. But they came out easily, making loud sucking noises as they did. The wet sand was filled with gaping holes, caverns that devoured creatures with no escape. The holes became larger and larger, waiting for unknowing travelers to tumble helplessly into them and fall to their doom.
One hole was larger than the rest. Midnightstar approached it and looked down. She could have easily fallen into the hole, but she seemed to be floating above it. She peered deeper into the blackness and saw the glowing orbs of her eyes, but no face for them to attach to. She gasped, losing her balance and tumbling into the pit.
As she fell, the darkness flashed pink, then purple then orange. A green rabbit floated past her, and became a yellow raven, flying away toward the blue light that was the top of the hole. She hurdled through a black and white world, stained with bursts of light.
Though Midnightstar was tumbling head over heels, she couldn’t see her feet. Where had they gone? Midnightstar looked down, and saw that she was fading away. She could no longer feel the sturdiness of her body. She was a mind vacant of a vessel, floating through a world of terror. The red color of blood splattered across the walls of the tunnel, and although she was nothing but a mind, she kept falling without end.
She plummeted faster and faster, and a sharp pain stabbed into her shoulder and the colors vanished. Midnightstar looked down and sighed in relief when she saw her paws dangling off her legs. Then she looked past her feet and saw that land was almost fifty feet below her. She was floating, but she didn’t know how. The pain in her shoulder increased.
Something pulled her up, away from the ground that was so far below. Then the pain faded and she was on solid ground, back in the real world.
“Pay attention, Midnightstar!” Rabika’s voice snapped. “Next time there might not be anyone to save you!”
“What happened?” Midnightstar asked, looking around. Tatl and Adelaide had concerned looks across their faces. Xiuh had even emerged from hiding, and sat just a short distance away. Blood was running down Rabika’s teeth.
“You walked off the cliff,” Tatl answered. “We thought we lost you, until Rabika grabbed you.”
“You made her bleed!” Adelaide shrieked mindlessly. “We have to stop the bleeding!”
“She’s fine, Adelaide, it’s just a little scratch,” Rabika snarled. “I couldn’t get her unless I bit down.”
“Are you alright?” Adelaide asked Midnightstar.
Midnightstar looked around blindly for a moment, gazing at her paws. They were still attached. “I’m fine. I guess I was just thinking.”
“That was more than just thinking,” Rabika barked. “What is going on with you? There has to be something you’re not telling us.”
“There’s nothing,” Midnightstar replied. “Nothing at all.”
“Midnightstar! You have to talk to us!” Rabika growled.
“There’s nothing wrong with me.” Midnightstar snapped back. “Everything’s fine.”
“No, it’s not,” Rabika argued. “You should’ve seen the look on your face right now! Completely blank, like you were hypnotized! Or in another world!”
“Back down, Rabika.” Xiuh’s voice floated over to them, and the dragon drew near. “She has many things on her mind, and you bothering her isn’t helping any.”
“What do you know of wolves, you good for nothing beast?” Rabika snapped.
“Back down!” Xiuh’s voice had a cruel bite to it that they’d never heard before. It was the kind of tone you’d expect from an enemy, not a friend.
Rabika stared him down for a moment before backing away at the fire in the small dragon’s eyes. Midnightstar’s friends retreated, to start walking around the edge of the cliff. Once they had moved away, Xiuh approached.
“You’re going to have to tell them sooner or later, wolf,” he said softly.
“Why did you just call me ‘wolf?’” she asked him.
“If I am nothing more than a dragon to you, then you will be nothing more than a wolf to me.” Xiuh replied.
Midnightstar winced. It was a painful blow, but she knew she deserved it. “Thank you for making her leave me alone.”
“It’s not right for her to press you like that,” Xiuh told her. “You will speak when you are ready.”
Come to me, Midnightstar. The voice was back, whispering as if dancing upon the wind. I can show you how meaningless this life is. You’re the last. You must come and save them.
Midnightstar looked up at the sky, searching. “I’m coming,” she muttered.
“What was that?” Xiuh asked.
“I didn’t say anything.” Midnightstar said quickly. “Must have been the wind.”
Xiuhcoatl stared at her. “Soon, wolf,” he insisted. “You can’t keep this from them for long.”
The small pack traveled a short distance more before deciding they needed rest. Or rather, Adelaide decided she was too tired to keep going, so the others were forced to stop with her.
“I’m sorry for slowing us down like this,” Adelaide apologized. “But my paws ache, and I’m covered in cuts from the thorn bushes.”
“It’s alright Adelaide, no one blames you,” Tatl comforted. “We all need some rest.”
“Not me. I can keep going for hours,” Rabika bragged.
“Yes, well, it’s not all about you, is it?” Tatl snapped. “You have to think about the good of everyone, Rabika.”
Rabika huffed and curled up next to a tree without another word. Midnightstar watched as the three wolves and the small dragon all drifted to sleep, but she couldn’t bring herself to close her eyes. She searched all around, listening for the voices, but they didn’t come. Eventually, she couldn’t stay awake any longer, so she closed her eyes and let herself drift off into her nightmares.
Cut off your paw, Midnightstar. Remove it, and watch the blood pour freely from it. What is a little blood spilt, when the world means nothing? Let the blood run.
Midnightstar was alone in a forest clearing, beautiful stars all around her. She gazed upwards at the stars, and the voices continued to talk to her, capturing her mind and holding it captive against their mesmerizing speech.
Let your blood run upon this ground. It’s all meaningless, anyway. You’re the last, so let this last blood be shed.
“No,” she said simply, but despite her rejection, she was drawn to do what the voices said. She peered around. A small steel trap lay in the middle of the clearing, catching her attention. Bloody, dark stains stood out against the cold metal.
Cut off your right paw, Midnightstar. What’s the meaning of this world without sacrifice? the voice said sweetly.
Midnightstar took one step toward the trap, and then another. With each step, she felt exhilarated, as if she were finally doing something right.
Just a little closer, Midnightstar, the voice said, egging her on. Let the stars of your back be your planets. Let the blood run upon this meaningless ground.
“Just a little blood, right?” Midnightstar hushed, still moving forward. She reached the trap and stood beside it, peering down at the evil device. “What does it matter?” she lifted her right foot into the air and moved it closer, hovering above the spikes. When her paw was directly above the trap, she stepped down quickly without understanding why.
The jaws snapped and color swirled before her eyes. A bee flew past her in the dark, its small wings sending off waves of green as it buzzed by. Blood splattered across the grass. Midnightstar stumbled backward and looked at her foot. The paw was gone, leaving a bloody stump in its
place. Yet she felt no pain. The trap vanished in a puff of silver smoke, taking her severed paw with it.
Yes, Midnightstar. More blood spilt for a war that is useless. This world is not for you. Come to us.
“Where are you?” Midnightstar questioned, watching the orange motion of a fox as it ran past.
In your mind, living just out of reach, the voice said. Recede into yourself, and find us. That is, if you know who you are. The voice broke away, cackling maniacally.
“Who am I?” Midnightstar broke into a run, leaving the clearing behind. Her missing paw never slowed her down, but rather, made her move even faster.
“Who am I?!” she yelled out at no one. The trees inched closer to her and the path grew narrow until she was completely enclosed in branches. There was nowhere for her to go. Trapped, Midnightstar let out a deranged howl and cried, “Who am I supposed to be?”
“Midnightstar!” Tatl’s voice startled her awake. Midnightstar jumped on the spot, blearily shaking her head. “We have to get moving. The Ortusans are on the prowl.”
Midnightstar laid where she was a moment longer and then rose to her feet, checking to be sure she had all four paws. They were all there, but the fur around her right paw was matted with red. “What happened to my foot?” she asked, lifting it curiously.
“You were chewing it raw a few moments ago,” Tatl explained. “You must’ve been dreaming of hunting.”
“Yes. That’s it,” Midnightstar replied dreamily, her gaze mottled and distant. “Hunting”
“Are you alright?” Adelaide asked.
“I’m fine.” Midnightstar quickly licked her paw clean and cringed. The wound was deep. If she had chewed anymore, she would’ve struck the bone. She stepped down nervously, but despite her injury, she didn’t feel a thing. Odd.
“We have to keep moving,” Tatl insisted. “Let’s get going.”
The group began to move on, but Midnightstar stayed behind a moment. There was a small spot of blood upon the ground, but the wound in her ankle no longer bled. A wound this deep should’ve been gushing, but it was completely dry.
