by Ophelia Grey
“Grace,” Daniel said in his calming voice.
I turned around and he took my hands in his, staring into my eyes with a small smile.
“I want you to understand that I am not doing this to embarrass you. I had to discuss what you did last week with your parents and Pastor Rick because it is important that all of us know the temptations that you are facing and find some way to help safeguard your purity until our marriage.”
For a second, I was confused. What on earth was he talking about? And then I realized what he meant and my heart dropped to my stomach. My cheeks burned bright red from anger and embarrassment and I dropped his hands.
“You told them about that!?” I glared at him accusingly. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest and it took everything in me not to yell or scream. How could I trust him if he was willing to break my trust and tell my parents about our most intimate moments? And how could he live with his hypocrisy? I had only tried to make him happy and give him what I thought he wanted.
I lived at home with my parents and commuted to college, but Daniel had a dorm on campus. Sometimes I would go spend time with him there and we would spend a lot of time making out and whispering about our dreams of a future together.
Last week, when Daniel had run out to get us sodas, I had stripped down to my bra and panties and posed on his bed. I didn't want to break my vow of chastity. I just wanted him to appreciate my body, to maybe touch my breasts or do something more than just kissing. It wasn't so wrong if we were pretty much already engaged, right?
To my disappointment and embarrassment, Daniel had told me that I was being corrupted and to put my clothes back on. He didn't realize that I had seen the bulge in his pants get bigger when he saw me like that. And he also didn't realize that the only reason that I had entertained the idea in the first place was that I had found porn on his laptop's history when I was doing research for a paper while he was out.
At first, I had been disgusted, slamming the computer shut. But my curiosity had won out. I slowly opened the computer again, and watched dubiously as the video played. A busty young woman in lacey black lingerie was kneeling in front of an older man. The man’s large penis was dangling in front of her face and she bounced happily, grabbing it between her large lips as if it were some delicious treat. I watched as she sucked, groaned, and slobbered all over the man’s erect penis until he exploded, spurting white liquid all over the young woman’s smiling face.
I glared at Daniel now. I was tempted to blurt out that he was a hypocrite and a pervert and let my parents know that he had watched porn. But I kept my lips shut and just nodded as both he and my father droned on and on about the temptations of the flesh and the value of a young woman's chastity. The worst part was that he had told Pastor Rick, although he couldn’t possibly know why that would hurt me so much. That was my one big secret from Daniel and the rest of the world.
“So that is why we think you should take a year off of college to stay at home and study the bible and learn how to be a good wife for Daniel when he graduates.”
Wait, what? I finally snapped back to attention, my mouth hanging open. They were going to make me drop out of college. And Daniel was just agreeing to go along with it. I knew he wanted me to be a good wife and stay at home with our future children, but he knew how important my education was to me and how much I wanted to experience working, even if just for a little while.
“Fine!” I heard myself spit out. “I can't force you to pay for college, but you can't force me to stay here. I'm finding a job and leaving.”
I turned and stormed out the front door in a fit of anger before realizing I had nowhere to go. My best friend Mary would only tell me to return home and apologize to my father for my disobedience. She was always there for me, but she could never understand my desire to rebel. But I was not going to apologize. I was done apologizing for everything. I had been so good, done everything everyone else had told me to do, and now it was time for me to live my life on my terms.
I walked along the dusty dirt road that led from my parent's house to the center of town, holding up the bottom of my long, modest dress so it didn't drag in the dirt. The road was flat and straight, like everything in Mercy River. The first thing I needed to do was find a job somewhere far away from this little town. I resolved to leave Mercy River and not look back.
I decided the best thing to do would be to go to the library and check the newspaper's classified section. I wasn't exactly sure what skills or training I had that would be relevant to any jobs, but I was eager to do anything different. I wanted to learn about the world, support myself, and finally feel like I was valuable and needed for more than just my quiet obedience.
I imagined myself as a high-powered CEO as I walked down the dusty road. In my mind, I was wearing a black skirt suit with my hair in a tight bun as I ran around with a clipboard. I walked tall, my head held high and my stilettos clicking on the marble floor.
I shook my head to clear it of the unrealistic image. I didn't even have my degree from my podunk Mercy River Christian College. I would probably need to set my sights lower to start. I could work as a nanny or a housekeeper, but those were the type of jobs my parents would approve of, women's work, work that would prepare me for my role as Daniel's wife. I wanted to try something different. I could be a secretary or an assistant, I thought hopefully.
The warm spring air had turned heavy and oppressive by the time I reached the library. I was covered in a layer of sweat under my long dress and a few tendrils of hair were plastered to the side of my face. Even the air in Mercy River was oppressive.
I pulled the heavy door to the library open and sucked in the cold air as it hit my face. I had spent many summers hiding away in the library as a child just to have relief from the heat and humidity that lingered for months. My quest for a break from the summer heat had turned into a love of knowledge and reading as I had quickly read my way through the small library’s collection of books. I felt the hunger for adventure bloom inside me as I read the tales of Odysseus and Gulliver. I realized that the world was much bigger than Mercy River and that there was still so much more for me to learn.
Luckily, the library was empty, except for the old librarian napping at her desk. I smiled as she snored quietly, her thick glasses askew as she slept on a pile of books. I ran my fingers over the spines of the old books as I walked down the aisle, remembering when and where I had read each one. So far, books had been my biggest escape. Now it was time for me to move on and have a real life adventure.
I reached the table where the newspapers were kept, folded neatly and arranged by date and type. I passed over the local papers and looked for the big city papers. I pulled out five and then found a seat at the long table so I could pour over the classifieds. The first paper contained almost nothing useful. There were many job postings, but all of them were very specific and technical, calling for multiple years of experience. I set that paper aside and turned to the second one. The first few ads didn’t interest me, but then my eyes fell on one small ad at the bottom.
“Seeking intelligent assistant for temporary live-in work for successful businessman. No experience necessary. Impress me,” I read, already feeling the excitement coursing through me. This was it. This was the job for me. I quickly grabbed the paper and ran over to the old communal computer in the corner. I had an old, used laptop at home, but I wanted to send out the email as soon as possible.
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing to apply for the live-in assistant position you advertised. I do not have much work experience, but I am eager to learn. I’ve always been a quick learner, teaching myself about history and literature from books at my local library. I’ve outgrown my small town and I am willing to work hard and do whatever is required of me so I can learn more about how to succeed in business. Please let me prove myself.
Sincerely,
Grace Martin
I finished typing and clicked send before I could second-guess m
yself. I knew there were many people searching for jobs and most of them probably had more experience and education than I did, but I knew that this job was for me.
It was still early afternoon, so I decided to stay at the library and read over one of my favorite books, The Count of Monte Cristo, for the hundredth time. I ran my hands over the yellowed pages and the cracked spine that was worn from years of use. I smiled, realizing that I had been the one who left most of those marks over the years. I remembered huddling in the corner of the library with a bag of carrots that the librarian had pretended not to notice and spending hours turning these pages, engrossed in the mysterious tale of revenge. I had checked the book out and carried it everywhere for weeks, reading outside in the shade of my favorite oak tree and under my covers with a flashlight at night.
A quiet beeping sound broke me from my reverie. I looked over my shoulder and saw the flashing computer screen. I must have forgotten to sign out of my email. I quickly put my book down and went over to silence the computer before it woke up the librarian and she came over to scold me. The screen was flashing the notice that I had a new email. Excitement coursed through me as I looked over the subject line. You’re hired! I couldn’t believe it. Maybe it was a trick or a scam?
My hands were shaking as I clicked the email and glanced over the short paragraph:
Congratulations Ms. Martin! Your application has been selected and I would like to personally offer you the position as my temporary personal assistant. Your start date will be one week from today. The job includes room and board, as well as compensation commensurate with your work and results. You will be receiving a bus ticket in the mail shortly.
Sincerely,
Blake Harrison
I sat back in the rickety wooden chair and closed my eyes, letting the information sink in. I still couldn’t believe it. Just hours ago, I had no plans to leave Mercy Rivers. Now I had a job and a place to live and a date. A week! I was leaving in a week. I felt tingles down my spine as the realization set in that my freedom, terrifying and exhilarating, was only a week ahead.
By the time I got back to my house, the air was cooling as the calm of evening fell over Mercy River. Daniel was already gone and my parents were no longer interested in talking to me. I breathed a sigh of relief as I pushed open the screen door leading from the porch to the kitchen and my mother didn’t turn from where she was kneading dough. I knew I would need to tell my parents about my job, but I wanted some time to keep it as my own delicious little secret.
I lay in bed that night with images of my future life swirling through my head. I imagined a kind old gentleman as my boss. Blake Harrison would be smart and successful and would teach me how to be a leader, an entrepreneur, a businesswoman. I would shadow him and assist him and work my way up in his company. I fell asleep dreaming of Dior business suits and heels far higher than my mother would ever allow.
The rest of the week was a whirlwind. I finally told my parents about my plans over breakfast that first morning and they had remained stone-faced and silent. Daniel never even came around to say goodbye, but I was pretty sure my father had filled him in on all the details. I felt a small pang in my heart when I thought of leaving Daniel, but the exhilaration of leaving Mercy River and finally seeing more of the world washed away the heartache.
My bus ticket came in the mail a few days later, just like Mr. Harrison had promised. I opened the envelope giddily in my room and pressed the ticket to my racing heart, trying my best not to squeal in delight. It was finally real. My escape had arrived. I looked at the destination on the ticket and my eyes grew wide. Connecticut. I had never been that far East, or that close New York City before. I imagined myself on a business trip to the city, walking hurriedly down the packed sidewalks and taking elevators to the top floor of towering skyscrapers. New York was the place for serious people with big dreams and I was taking my first huge step in that direction.
The day finally arrived on a foggy morning. I expected to be more excited than ever, but when I woke up I discovered that a calm had fallen over me. I was ready to leave. I quickly changed into jeans and a lacey white tank top, but threw on a lavender cardigan at the last minute to guard against the chilly early morning air. My parents were still asleep, so I slipped out of the house as silently as I could with my purse and my one rolling suitcase.
I walked down the road, listening to the silence of the early morning. Mercy River was a boring town, but the magic of an early summer morning gave it a certain beauty. I enjoyed the sounds of birds and crickets as I pulled my suitcase after me on the one-lane road. I arrived at the bus station half an hour before my bus was set to leave and found a seat on the slightly cracked bench outside to wait.
The bus finally pulled up as I was starting to grow sleepy, my eyelids drooping against my will. The loud creak of brakes yanked me awake and I quickly grabbed my bags and boarded the dusty bus. There were only a few other passengers, and most of them looked angry or were sleeping against the windows, so I found myself a seat near the back and curled up with my bags as well. I slept through the first few hours of the trip, falling in and out of strange dreams, where I floated on a river watching the current pull me further and further from my friends and family on the shore. I woke up to the staccato sound of quiet rain pattering against the window.
The rest of the ride, I alternated between reading the book I had brought with me—Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray—and staring out the window at the towns and cities as we passed. Mostly, I liked to watch how quiet the world looked as the rain gently bathed the highways. The time passed much more quickly than I imagined and before I knew it, we were pulling up to the dingy Connecticut bus station. It looked similar to the one in Mercy River, but much bigger and teeming with people.
I quickly gather my belongings and made my way to the exit, trying my best to elbow any other passengers. Most of the other passengers did not have the same concern, so I was one of the last people to exit and step into the large parking lot.
A kindly looking older gentleman in a suit caught my eye. He was holding up a sign, so I took a few steps forward to get a better look.
Grace Martin, the sign said. I sighed in relief that I wouldn’t have to wander through the parking lot until I found my ride.
“Hello, that’s me,” I said, pointing to the sign and then extending my hand to him.
“Nice to meet you Grace,” the man replied with a warm smile that reached all the way to the crinkles by his eyes. “Let me help you with those bags.”
He quickly hoisted up my bag in a feat of strength that surprised me given how slender he was, and walked me to a shiny black limo. He opened the door for me, and then went to put my bags in the trunk.
“This fancy car is just for picking me up?” I asked incredulously as the driver climbed into the front seat and started the engine.
“My dear, I think you’ll learn that Blake Harrison expects nothing but the best, at all times, and in all areas.”
I mused the driver’s words over in my head as we pulled out of the parking lot and headed to my new home for however long I worked there. Surely, Blake Harrison was a generous man, as evidenced by his treatment of me so far. But would I live up to his exacting standards and expectations? I felt a nervous, excited tug in my chest as I thought about meeting my new employer. Whatever happened next, I was now sure that it was going to be a grand adventure.
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Acknowledgments:
I would like to thank my fellow writers for their suggestions and guidance along the way. You guys are the best group of authors I’ve ever met. Thank you!
To my family: Thanks for putting up with me when I was lost in my own world.
And most importantly: Thank you to all the readers who make being an author such a joy. I appreciate your feedback and that each and every one of you has taken the t
ime to read my work. It still blows my mind! I couldn’t do it without you.