by Ryan Michele
The man smiles wide. “Austin, huh? Shamus, you’re the last one I thought would find an ol’ lady. Damn, son, she’s gorgeous, too. Why’s she with your ugly mug?”
“Bones, this is Andrea Davies. She and I share a past. Riding today, came up on her laying out on the sidewalk after getting mugged.”
“You hit your head?” Bones asks me to which I nod. “You black out?”
“I, um, I,” struggling to find the words I take a deep breath. “I suffer from a TBI.”
“Previously? How long ago?”
“Almost eight months now. I was on an assignment, and well, the house we were staying at blew up.”
“What the fuck!” Austin says, pacing the room.
“Okay, let me check you out, see what this old man can figure for ya.” He turns to Austin. “Shamus, this ain’t what you wanna hear, but this may be something she needs to have twenty-four-hour monitoring.”
Tears prick behind my eyes. “I just need to go home. My mom will take care of me.”
How humiliating. I’m a twenty-eight-year-old woman wanting my mommy.
“I’ll take care of you, Drea,” Austin says in a way that tells me not to argue.
Bones goes about flashing lights in my eyes, scraping the bottoms of my feet, and checking me from top to toe while I hear Austin on the phone with my mother explaining that DJ would be picking her up and bringing her to me.
On one hand, I love that someone cares to look out for me, for her, and for our safety. No one ever has. On the other hand, can I really handle having Austin tangled in my life once again?
Chapter 6
She’s got a headache, and I’ve got a hard on!
I listen as she explains what she remembers from her time in Ukraine. Of all the damn places in the world, why the fuck would she chase a story there? The news always has stories about something happening, and it pisses me off that I wasn’t there to stop her.
Not that I could have with the way our relationship currently is, but if she would have stuck around here, then she wouldn’t have been in a war-torn country. I make a mental note to have Gilly, Skinny, and Triple Threat check out Mr. David Holloway out. Drea says he’s dead, but something with this story doesn’t sit right with me. Fuck, who am I kidding—none of this story sits right. Not to mention this fucking mugging—in Granville. Who in their right mind would try and pull that shit? Drea wants to call the cops, but they ain’t got shit on the Ruthless Rebels. This is our motherfuckin’ town, and we take care of it. Crime has been way down since we took charge because people think twice before they do something knowing we’re on the end of it and not a jail cell.
Vigilante justice some call it, but I don’t give a rat’s ass. No one comes to my home and does this shit. Which leads me to believe that this is an outside job. One that could possibly have to do with her past. I’m not sure yet, but I’ll get to the bottom of this shit and fast.
My mind goes over it all. My anger rises thinking of everything Drea has been through, but I calm myself knowing she needs me on my game, not reacting in rage.
Her time in the hospital had to be hell, all alone in some foreign country. I fucking hate the thought of that. Then to receive the news about her brain—her motherfucking brain. Pieces of it broke off and are floating in her damn head. This isn’t an injury that she’ll get over in a few years, it’s a damn life sentence and a thousand times worse than three hots and a cot ever would be.
When she practically fell into my arms in the parking lot and I heard the rumble in her stomach, I thought for sure I’d be covered in her vomit. No way I’d let go, though.
She may see me as some trailer trash to throw out, but I’m not that man. This woman was once my everything, no way am I letting her ride this out on her own. She’s going to learn quickly the man I am today.
“So?” Bones looks at me with a bit of gloom on his otherwise frown-filled face. The man always has the wrinkles even when he smiles, which is rare.
“Brother, she’s right. There’s really nothin’ that can be done with her noggin’. But you’re damn lucky that’s all she has. This shit could be so much worse, Shamus. She could be in a permanent coma, but she’s up, movin’. That right there is a blessin’.”
I look over to Drea and see a tear fall from the corner of her eye to my bed. Fuck I hate this shit. Would rather be gutted with a knife than hear she’s going through this. Has been going through this—for months.
“Alright, so is there surgery or something?”
Drea lets out a laugh, but it’s not humorous one bit. “Don’t you think I would have done the surgeries when I was in Germany if there was one that would fix me? Austin, please just let me go home.”
There’s a sense of humiliation in her tone and don’t like that shit either. Nothing to be feeling that way about.
I ignore her and move back to Bones because she’s not in the mindset at the moment for much of anything. I get that. “No surgery, so what do we have?”
“I can only go off what she tells me, Shamus. I don’t have an MRI here to look. All I can do is look and listen. If everything she says is right, she’s going to have the vision, hearing, and memory problems for the rest of her life. She’s going to have to live with the dizziness and the occasional times she passes out.” Bones looks over to Drea. “Did they clear you to drive?”
She closes her eyes and whispers, “No.”
He turns back to me. “Right, so it’s bad enough they don’t want her behind a wheel, but she functions very well for the injury she has. Gotta be happy with that, brother.”
I know he’s right, but I want to fix her and put her back together again. I don’t want her to live with this, and I really don’t want her to hurt. She may have caused me pain all those years ago, but a part of me has always been reserved just for her. No matter what I did in the past to make it go away, it never has.
“Right, thanks.”
“Since that piece of shit who took her purse also took her meds, I’m giving you these.” He hands me a bottle. “Use these sparingly for the head pain, and I’ll get her right meds tomorrow. Need to watch her close for the next twenty-four. She hit her head, and any more damage there isn’t good. I can get her an MRI, but it’ll be tomorrow, maybe the next, before that’ll happen.”
“Thanks.”
Bones grabs his bag and heads out of the room.
“I told you there was nothing he could do for me. Now that you know the whole bloody thing, I’m leaving when my mom gets here.”
“Good luck with that one, Kitten. DJ’s bringin’ her here, so no car. And you can’t even sit up straight without gettin’ dizzy, have fun walkin’. You’re stuck here, and there’s no safer place for ya.”
“I have to disagree with that one,” she grumbles. “I’m not really keen on hanging out with you.”
“Too bad. Get over it,” I reply, trying to stop the verbal assault. Her words slice through me and open old wounds. If she knew the man I am today …
“Why are you doing this? You don’t even like me, Austin.”
“What makes you think that?”
She turns her head so her pain-filled eyes connect with mine. “Pussy’s just pussy. Right, Austin. You lump all women into that mold, and I was the unlucky one to get hit first.”
“What the ever-lovin’ hell are you talkin’ about?”
She turns her head to look back up at the ceiling. “Nothing,” she whispers.
“It damn sure isn’t nothin’. A lot of words just spewed out of those lips, and I want to know why.” I move the bed intent on getting my answers when the door flies open, my head snapping to it. Ms. Patty comes storming in with DJ at her back. Her eyes widen as she looks to the bed and darts over to Drea.
“I’m fine, Mom, I promise,” Drea consoles her, but Ms. Patty is having none of it.
“You’re not. Stop with that.” She turns to me. “What happened?”
I explain hearing Drea’s huffs of protest. The one time duri
ng the explanation she tries to get up, she makes herself fall back to the bed, no doubt dizzy.
“What were you doing?” Ms. Patty asks Drea.
“I was headed over to the post office. Kenderly didn’t feel well, and I was doing her a favor by dropping off the letters. I did that and was on my way back.”
“Stubborn girl!” Ms. Patty chastises. “You shouldn’t go off alone. We talked about that. You’re with someone or you don’t go.”
“Don’t worry, Ms. Patty, she’s not alone anymore,” I step in. If looks could kill, Drea just murdered me and quite possibly is contemplating ways to make that happen for real.
“Austin,” Both Davies women say my name simultaneously. Ms. Patty wins, though.
“While I know you and Andrea have a history and I’ve missed you being around, things are different now.”
“He knows, Mom,” Drea interrupts with a defeated tone. “I had to tell him.”
“Well, good! There is nothing for you to be ashamed of, Andrea Lynn, and I’ve been telling you that for months.” Ms. Patty looks to me. “Thank you, Austin, for taking care of her. You’re a good man. If you’ll just give us a ride home, Andrea and I will be fine from here.”
Drea looks at me like she has won some prize. I look to her mother and relay, “Ms. Patty, DJ brought you here so both of you can be together while the Rebels sort out who has Drea’s purse and the safety of your information.”
Ms. Patty is the same height as Andrea. She has the same mahogany hair as her daughter and although she’s aged well, I do see fatigue lines around her eyes making me wonder how hard all of Drea’s recovery has been on her mom.
She walks to me, reaching out to grab my hand and squeeze it. “Austin, honey, I’ve always wished things worked out for you. I’m glad to see the man you’ve grown into has family and loyalty.”
“Why do I get the feeling you gotta but coming?” I ask on a laugh to which she gives me a sad smile.
“Austin, I’ve had a lot of years, just me and Andrea. We’ve taken care of each other, and we’ll get through this, too. Your kindness is appreciated, but we can get her new identification and medication.”
Reaching out, I wrap my arms around the woman who once was a mother to me when I had none. Holding Ms. Patty in my arms, she relaxes and hugs me back. Andrea watches us closely as tears fill her eyes again.
“Ms. Patty, gotta tell you, ain’t had the best in life. Ain’t had a shit life either. Found myself a family here with the Rebels,” I say over her head while keeping her close and making my eyes lock onto Andrea’s. “Learned a lot in life, still got shit to learn, but you know what I’ve known to my core: never forget where you come from. Don’t leave the ones who matter behind. Drea, you, well, y’all matter, and I’m not turning my back on this or either of you. Let shit go in the past, let it all slip away. Won’t do that again.” I pull away when I feel the wetness of her tears on my t-shirt. “Not the man I was made to be. Not letting go.”
Ms. Patty looks to Andrea then looks to me. “You want to take on Andrea’s problems? Austin, it’s not something she can schedule. The episodes, the nightmares, the headaches. It’s not something she can always handle. You won’t see it coming and neither will she. You have a good life, Austin Fletcher. It’s appreciated that you care. I love you for the love you gave my daughter before and the love you are showing her now, but Austin, it’s not necessary. We’re okay and we’ll be okay.”
“Mom,” Drea whispers, and I feel the pain in her voice. “Please, stop.”
“Ms. Patty, not a damn thing in life is scheduled. I don’t know what the next five minutes hold. But what I do know is your daughter left me, and things haven’t sat right with me ever since. She’s here now. The circumstances aren’t perfect but they damn sure are what they are, and I’m not about to turn my back on any of it.”
“How long?” Andrea asks interrupting me. “How long do we need to stay to make you happy and stop talking about second chances that won’t happen?”
“Till I know who mugged you.”
Ms. Patty looks at me and then to Drea. “Fine.” She gives in, not giving Andrea a chance to argue. “But we go home. You can come with us, Austin, if it’ll make you feel better, but I can’t miss work and all of her medications are at home.”
Looking around the room, I realize there isn’t a lot of space in my single bedroom and bathroom at the compound, for all three of us. So I simply nod, happy we have some sort of compromise.
DJ steps up from where he’s been hanging out in the doorway. “Brother,” he looks to me, “how about the Davies come stay with Kenderly and me?” I see the look in his eye, and he’s serious.
When he steps into the hallway, I follow shutting the door to my room to give us privacy.
“Look, I know you want to keep an eye on them. I get it, Shamus. Thing is, after the shit with Kenie, I don’t think their house may be safe. We got the space since her mom and aunt got their own place. We won’t even know you’re there. Kenie can get Andrea to and from work for you while we sort this.”
He makes a valid point. “You sure?”
“Know what she put you through when she rolled out. I also know she loved you just as hard back. More to the story, in my opinion. It may be history, but it’s still a story. Ya get me?”
I need answers. This is just the time and opportunity I need to sort it all out. Whether we can find a new way together or get closure, it’s more than I’ve had in a lot of years from the girl who had my heart first and never gave it back.
Chapter 7
Confusion sucks even worse when your brain is fucked up!
“Thank you for letting us stay here, Kenderly. I’m so sorry to impose.” My head shakes. One thing I didn’t want, ever, was to be a burden to people, including my mother. Her words the other day in Austin’s room cut like a knife. She didn’t intend for that. I know it, but they did. She’s put her life pretty much on hold, working day and night to help me. It’s time I give her a break. I’m not sure how I can do that with my condition, but I’ll figure it out.
Austin and the Rebels moved us here in the matter of a few hours. It’s funny how fast and in sync they are. It’s actually mesmerizing. Austin really did find himself a family. One that works together with smiles on their faces. I always wanted that for him. To belong. He spent most of his life not belonging to anyone, except me.
“What’s wrong?” Kenderly asks as I snap out of my thoughts, with her brow raised.
“Nothing, I’m good.” It’s a lie and I hate it, but what Austin and I had is done with, and there’s no need to dredge it up.
“Girl, spill your shit. It’s not often we get this place to ourselves, and DJ is due back any minute. Let me hear it.”
I shake my head, and my chest constricts. “I can’t.”
“The hell you can’t. You told me about almost dying. Hello! You can tell me about Shamus.”
“Why do you all call him that, Shamus?” I’ve been wondering that since seeing him again. It really doesn’t make any sense.
“Don’t tell him I told you.” I only nod because I don’t plan on talking to Austin about any of this. “DJ told me that he got his name because he was having sex with one of the tricks at the club.”
“Wait, tricks?” I heard Austin say that word before but had no clue what it meant.
“They’re the women around the club who service the men. At least the ones who aren’t taken.” I think back to the woman that Austin called Peaches, and I wonder how many times she serviced him. The thought makes me sick to my stomach. “I guess he was drunk off his ass and was having sex with one. Well, he came a little too early and the club named him Shamus, for shameless. Because he had no shame that night.”
Lovely, his name represents him having sex with someone in front of his brothers. No way I’m calling him that. Not happening.
Inside I crack, break, and bend, but on the outside I’m a mask. It’s been years, and I already knew this about him.
Pussy’s just pussy after all. This is another reminder of where it all went so wrong. It’s not a surprise, but it damn sure cuts like a knife because I loved him with everything I had inside me. Everything.
I feel the tears begin to prick the back of my eyes, and I push them down. No need for this.
“It’s alright, Kenderly. I know what he’s like. It’s no secret.” This is exactly why I tried to avoid him.
“Enough of that. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. There is more there between the two of you.”
“What, like a nameless, faceless pussy to get off in? I’m positive that’s not reserved just for me.” I lift the mug of coffee off the kitchen table and take a sip. My body feels back to normal, whatever in the hell that is—I don’t know. Wish my heart would stop the continuous ache, but that’s not going to happen when everywhere I turn, Austin is either there or in my thoughts.
“No!” she exclaims, and I almost spill my joe. “He does not look at you like he looks at the tricks. I’ve seen that myself.”
“Once, Kenderly, he looked at me with an unread emotion. You were with us twice, when we moved in here, to see us together or him with other’s while I was around,” I charge back. “I promise you I’m nothing more than a memory to him.”
“So, still saw it. Anyway, you’re not a nameless, faceless anything, and you’d better talk to the man if you really think that.”
“Not gonna happen. Once he lets me out of purgatory, I’m going back home.”
“Purgatory?” she laughs loud, the sound echoing through the wide open space. This house is huge, enormous actually, and has two separate wings. Both my mom and I have our own rooms even. “Honey, this is far from that. He’s just trying to look out for you and keep you safe.”
The house is a ranch style four bedroom, two bathroom house, with a gorgeous wrap around porch. The open floor plan connects the living, dining, and kitchen in a unique way that no matter what room you’re in, you have an excellent view of the entire space. The best part of the house is how the rooms are laid out. The master bedroom and bath are off to the left of the house, kind of in their own wing, all the while the other three bedrooms are off to the right of the living space. As much as I feel like we are imposing, I’m happy DJ and Kenderly have their own space without us crowding them.
