by Tabatha Kiss
Dani hovers over my shoulder with her arms crossed. “I sensed some friction there…” she hums. “You wanna talk about it?”
“It’s not what you think.”
She slides in closer as I inspect the bag. I grab the bowie knife and smile at the ankle holster Caleb tossed inside, along with enough extra ammo to take down a small army. That’s her style, I suppose. All or nothing.
“Did you two have some sordid, desert love affair or something?” Dani asks.
“No,” I answer, zipping it closed.
She scoffs. “Oh, come on.”
“We didn’t,” I claim. “She and Boxcar, however…”
“Who’s Boxcar?”
I close the trunk. “Boxcar is our next stop.”
“The guy in Denver that can decrypt the drive?” I nod and gesture for her to get back in the car. We walk around opposite sides and climb in. “What happened between them?”
“Caleb and I met Boxcar in Afghanistan during my second tour.” I start the car and the engine roars with life. “We received intel that an American journalist with knowledge of a secret weapons cache was being held captive in a warehouse in Kabul. We go in but find nothing. No enemy combatants, no weapons, no journalist. Just Boxcar and his laptop. The roof collapsed on the building, trapping him inside. Turns out, he hacked our equipment with a distress signal so we’d come dig him out.”
Her eyes narrow. “Why make up a story about a weapons cache?”
“Because he thought we wouldn’t come otherwise.” I shrug. “Honestly, he was right.”
“I can’t imagine the top brass being happy about him wasting their time.”
“Oh, they weren’t. Boxcar was a good hacker but hacking government equipment is generally considered a no-no. Instead of shipping him back to the States to do jail time, they assigned him to our unit as a civilian intelligence freelancer.”
“And he and Caleb hit it off?”
“Not at first,” I chuckle. “Box is a bit of a card but by far the smartest person I’ve ever met. And Caleb… she doesn’t fuck around.”
Dani smiles. “I got that vibe.”
“Last I heard they were done but if you talk to them separately you can just see it. They aren’t really done.”
“Sounds romantic.”
“Try telling them that.”
We take off down the road, passing through early-morning traffic at a snail’s pace. Dani leans back in her seat, her eyes flush with deep, silent thoughts until we make it out of Los Angeles. Every so often, her eyelids flutter closed and she leans her head against the window. She didn’t sleep much last night. Neither did I.
Even now, in the most innocent and vulnerable of poses, I can’t keep my eyes off of her. I’m not sure why I lied to her last night. Here we are, closer in proximity than we’ve ever been in our lives and there’s no one around to intervene. We could have picked up where we left off five years ago and part of me thinks she wanted to. Maybe it was just the booze in her or the adrenaline from getting attacked but there was something in her eyes. I don’t want to act on it in case I have it all wrong.
I can’t imagine losing her twice in one lifetime.
***
“Can I drive?”
My eyes drift left to look inside the window of a passing truck. “No,” I answer. There’s a man driving it with a small girl in the passenger seat. No real threat there.
“Why not?”
I look at Dani. Her sunglasses sit on top of her head, buried inside the short, black bob. She was passed out asleep just ten minutes ago, but her eyes show a fresh, wakeful enthusiasm now. “Because no.”
“That’s not a reason.”
“You’ve never heard Bennett say because I said so before?” I joke.
“Of course. It’s his catchphrase.”
“Do you even have a driver’s license?”
“I do, actually!” she says, chuckling softly.
“Have you ever used it?” Fast movement brings my eyes to the rearview mirror. A black car makes a dangerous pass around a vehicle a few hundred yards behind us. I grip the wheel, preparing for the worst.
“A few times,” Dani answers. “Although, come to think of it, I’m not exactly sure where it is…”
I laugh. “All the more reason to let me drive, Dani.” The same black car revs its engine and weaves around us. The driver is young. Male. Red, puffy eyes. Not an assassin. Just an idiot. I loosen my grip on the wheel.
Dani lays her head back in defeat. “Can I listen to the radio then?”
“I’d prefer silence.”
“Why?”
“Because I need to concentrate.” I glance over at her again. She bends forward to slip her shoes and socks off. “You should leave those on, just in case.”
“Fox, it’s been almost eight hours,” she points out. She stretches out her tiny toes, wiggling them free. I force myself not to stare at the ballerina-like arches of her feet. “If someone were following us, we would probably know by now.”
“That’s not necessarily true.”
“How so?”
“Dani, please just sit quietly and let me do what I do.”
She laughs, throwing her head back. “Damn, Fox…”
“What?”
“So serious.” Her laughter continues.
“How you find this so amusing, I’ll never understand.”
“I’m sorry…” She tries to stop laughing but her lips twitch. “I don’t know why I’m laughing… This is all just so…”
“Surreal?” I suggest.
“Fun.”
I look at her with wide eyes. “Fun?”
“Not fun,” she says, biting her lip. “Just… I don’t know what I mean. I guess that says something about my life, though, doesn’t it? Having a near-death experience is what it takes for me to have fun.”
“Oh, come on. You have access to everything in the world. Any girl would kill to be in your shoes.”
Her smile drops. “I can’t argue with that.” She falls silent and looks out the window. The setting sun casts an orange glow on her face, but I catch the darkness hiding behind her blue eyes.
I look back to the road and my stomach lurches with hunger. Has it really been eight hours? I’ve forgotten how quickly time flies when all my senses are on full alert. “You hungry?” I ask.
“Starving.”
I smile. “Okay. We’ll stop soon.”
“How much further do we have?”
“We’re about halfway to Denver,” I answer. “We should get there around two or three in the morning—”
“Can we stop for the night?”
I shake my head. “We should continue through the night, Dani.”
“You’re exhausted, Fox.”
“I’m fine.”
“Fox…” she leans over and points at her face, “look at who you’re talking to. I’m Roxie Roberts. I know a little something about exhaustion and even more, I know what it looks like when you try to hide it. The only difference is that I have a fully-staffed cosmetic team to hide the dark circles under my eyes.” Her finger swoops around her face, drawing little ovals beneath her lashes.
I glance up at the rearview mirror. She’s right. I might not feel it now but once the buzz in my nerves wears off, I’m sure I will. “We’ll see how I feel after we eat.”
“Or you can just let me drive.”
“No.”
She laughs. “Damn, I thought that would work…”
I smile and look over at her again. She lays her head back with her eyes drifting out the window. Her lips stay locked in an upturned grin, almost like she doesn’t even realize she’s smiling. I’m scared to look away, knowing that sooner or later it’ll fade along with this moment.
Fun, eh? It’s been a while since I’ve had it. I almost didn’t recognize it myself.
***
“Pancakes, please.” Dani’s eyes grow wide as she says it, displaying a powerful desire hidden behind her shades.
&n
bsp; “Coming right up.” The waitress flashes a strategic, tip-bait smile and walks away to put our order in.
I take a long sip of coffee, relishing in the caffeine boost. “Pancakes, eh?”
Dani slides her sunglasses down to the tip of her nose. “Dad rarely lets me have carbs,” she explains. “I might as well have them while I still can.”
I lean back in the booth. “Why do you let Bennett control you so much?”
Her eyes fall. “Let is a pretty strong word.”
“Dani, you have more than enough means to cut him off. It’s not like either of you will be on the street if you do.”
“I just…” Her teeth scratch her bottom lip. “Never mind. It’s stupid.”
“No, tell me,” I urge.
She takes her time. Her elbows bend and move as she slides her palms along her thighs beneath the table. “I don’t know anything else. He’s all I have and… he’s done a pretty good job at reminding me of that fact.”
Classic Bennett. What better way is there to keep a leash on her than to give her no other alternative than to follow? “You’ll adapt,” I say. “The world isn’t as scary as he makes it out to be.”
“Says the former contract killer,” she quips.
“You know what I mean.”
“That’s the thing, though, isn’t it? I really don’t.” She pushes her sagging sunglasses back up her nose. “I was born in L.A. If I ever make it back, I’ll probably die there, too.”
“There are worse ways to die. Trust me.”
“You’re right.” She nods softly as she runs a fingertip along the edge of her coffee mug. “I just wish my life didn’t feel so manufactured. And it’s not like I can complain about it either. If I even try to express an ounce of negativity, people just brush it off. What the hell does she have to complain about? Look at her.” She lets out a hard exhale. “They forget there’s an actual person beneath that spotlight.”
“You have a good life, Dani,” I whisper, grasping for ways to comfort her.
She tilts her head. “Yeah, but… is it really a life when someone else makes all of your decisions for you? Honestly, the choice between pancakes or waffles was the biggest decision I’ve made since… ever. I almost asked for your opinion.”
“I would have gone with waffles.”
She smiles and little dimples cave on her chin. “Well, shit…”
“Forget about all of that stuff.” I smile back without thinking. “We’re in the middle of nowhere. You don’t have to be anyone but Dani out here. Especially not with me.”
She scoffs. “Don’t pretend like you don’t see Roxie Roberts staring back every time you look over here.”
“You’ve never been Roxie to me.” I bite my tongue, feeling like I’ve gone too far. Her eyes flick up at me over the tops of her shades and her cheeks turn red. Definitely too far. “I mean…” I shrug and grab my coffee. “You’re my little sister, you know?”
Dani clears her throat. Her eyes drop to the table. “Yeah, I know.”
“All right!”
I lurch slightly as the waitress appears at the booth. “One bacon cheeseburger with fries and some pancakes.” She lays the plates down in front of us, along with a container of maple syrup for Dani. “Is there anything else I can get you two?”
“No, thanks,” I answer. Dani shakes her head with a kind smile.
“Enjoy.” She wanders off again.
Dani grabs the syrup and pours a healthy amount over the small stack of carbohydrate heaven. “I refuse to not enjoy this,” she mutters, squeezing even more from the bottle. It seeps to the edges of the plate before she finally stops and readies her fork.
I smile. It can’t be helped. This is Dani; the girl I knew before she was molded and shaped through the Hollywood filter.
“Hey…”
She looks up at me as I slide the edge of my plate towards hers. I nudge it a bit closer until she snags a fry and crushes it between her teeth.
“Oh, my god…” Her eyelids flutter closed. “I miss fries.”
I chuckle and pull my plate back.
***
I decide to get some rest and continue on to Denver in the morning.
I can easily manage the rest of the trip, but there’s something about extending it that just feels so damn tempting. It’s dangerous as hell. Getting this file decrypted is priority number one. Taking Mercer’s focus off of Dani is everything. And yet…
I don’t know. Maybe this is a little fun.
Dani lies on the other bed with the television remote in one hand, surfing away at the limited channels available. She’s on her side with her head propped up on her other hand. Her feet dangle off the side, connected to perfect, smooth legs. She slipped out of her jeans and into my big shirt again the second we arrived and it’s taking everything in me not to gawk at her.
“Uh-oh…” Dani points to the television.
A national news channel flashes a photo of her face, along with an older one of mine. ROXIE ROBERTS KIDNAPPED BY STEPBROTHER.
“Looks like Bennett is going all out with this…” I mutter.
“He must really hate you,” she says.
“Always has.”
She clicks away from the channel. I stand up from my own bed and walk to the window for a distraction, but there’s not much to see out here. It’s the most secluded, rundown motel I saw off the road. I guess it’s all my fault that there’s nothing else to look at other than her perky—
Dani lets out an exasperated moan and my ears twitch. “You’d figure there’d be something decent on. What else do people have to do around here?” I glance at her as she rolls onto her back. Her chest rises and falls. “A-ha!”
I blink out of it. “What?”
She points at the television. “Finally, some quality programming.”
Roxie Roberts looks back at me from the old, glass screen. Her blonde hair tumbles in the wind as waves crash below her feet, submerging her up to her knees. It’s the ending of the first Night Trials movie. Tears roll down her dirt-covered cheeks and she waves her arms up and down. The rescue boat sits on the horizon. Music swells. She’s finally escaped… until Part 2, of course.
I cross my arms and lean against the wall. “Is that you?”
“Yes, it’s me,” she laughs. “How have you never seen this before?!”
I shrug.
She peeks at me from the corners of her eyes. “You know, you’re pretty boring for a dead guy. Ooo! They’re showing it again. Sit down. The beginning is the best part.”
I stay on the wall. “I thought actors hated watching themselves on screen.”
“Only when I’m crying,” she says. “Or laughing. Or kissing somebody. I usually turn away then.”
“Why?”
She drops the remote by her side. “No one likes looking into the mirror when they’re actually feeling something.”
“But it’s not real,” I point out.
“It’s my job to make it look real, so it feels real.”
My eyes fall on the screen again. There she is. Little Roxie Roberts in the role that catapulted her to major stardom. I’ve seen this so many times, I could say the lines out loud. I’ve cried with her and laughed with her but it wasn’t real. Not like now. Now, she is real. She speaks and her voice vibrates my ears without passing through a set of speakers first. She’s so close, I could reach out and touch her warm, apple-scented skin. My fingers tremble. My face explodes with heat. My cock twitches in my slacks.
“Fuck it.”
I push off the wall and walk around the bed to her. She watches with suspicious eyes and they grow in surprise as I lower myself to the bed and balance over her.
“Fox, what—”
I kiss her. I fucking kiss her. It’s short, only a few seconds, but feels like a sublime hour of bliss. Blood rushes south, locking me in place above her. I open my eyes, prepared for the inevitable backlash. Get away from me, you creep. Don’t touch me. Who the hell do you think you are?
>
Dani stares at me but she doesn’t move. There’s only an inch of air between us. Her breath trembles through her lips to touch mine, smelling like warm cider. My mouth waters for more of her.
I touch her face, drawn to her like a magnet. Again, she doesn’t move. Heat radiates off her skin. I slide my thumb across her bottom lip. It feels so soft and smooth beneath my fingers, just like it did five years ago. I give her one more second, one last chance to push me away, before finally leaning in and kissing her again.
Her body feels tense and stiff but I can’t make myself stop tasting her. I take a much-needed breath, feeling the cold air wash through my body but it does little to chill my racing heart. She trembles beneath me. I can’t tell if it’s fear or pleasure driving her. I look into her eyes and I see both staring back at me.
Dani’s hands rise to my hips, hovering for a moment before she builds the courage to touch me. It’s like fireworks shooting up my back; the gentle pressure of her fingertips igniting the nerves beneath my skin.
She licks her lips and kisses me back. Her lips press against mine, pursing and quivering.
I ease myself between her legs and her knees settle against my sides.
Fuck. This is really happening.
I’ve fantasized a thousand times about this moment. Every night for years, I’ve lied in bed with closed eyes and this is what I saw. I’d kiss every inch of her alabaster skin. I’d taste her long enough to quench my thirst for her. I’d fuck her until she turned numb.
Tonight, I’m finally going to do it.
She leans back, her breath heavy and wild, as I attack her neck and collar bone. I keep my hands moving, practically twitching around her entire body with minds of their own. I can’t help it. It’s Roxie fucking Roberts for god’s sake — beautiful, perfect Dani.
I navigate down her shirt, flicking the buttons free, and slip my hands beneath it. Her skin feels like warm milk and tastes just as good. I cup her breast with one hand and feel her nipple swell between my fingers as she shudders beneath my touch. Pleasure radiates down my spine, fueling the blood in my cock. It rages for her, begs for her. Years of bedding look-a-likes have come to this moment. Years of imagining her face instead of theirs — of her lips wrapped around the tip of my dick instead of theirs.
