A Message for Julia

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A Message for Julia Page 5

by Angel Smits


  “They’ll drill an air shaft first,” Gabe whispered from the far corner as if fighting his own fears.

  “Yeah,” Linc agreed, hoping. “Fresh air. Man, won’t that be nice?” Perhaps he’d get another chance. Perhaps, he prayed, not even sure what he was praying for, but knowing it couldn’t hurt.

  Wouldn’t that surprise Julia? Him. Praying. He shook his head and smiled. The movement pulled the tight skin of his dry lips and the twinge of pain reminded him they all needed water.

  “Where are those water jugs?” he asked. The water was kept down here for the machines but came in handy in times like this.

  “Over by Casey,” Ryan answered.

  Linc found them easily. He opened one and took a deep swallow, then passed it to Ryan. “Take some. We need to stay hydrated.” Ryan nodded and drank. Everyone followed suit and they even managed to get some down Casey’s throat.

  Linc sank back down to his spot on the ground. He’d be damned if he was giving up.

  Julia might be up there. She might not, but he was going to do everything in his power to get back to her so they could at least fight it out face-to-face.

  He had to hold on to that anger. It might be all he had.

  Thursday Afternoon, 5:00 p.m.

  THE STEEL DOORS AT THE END of the gym burst open, sending Julia’s heart into her throat. Men covered in soot, their clothes grimy with it, flooded into the gym.

  Everyone in the bleachers stood. Looking, seeking the man they’d spent the past few hours agonizing over.

  Fervently, Julia searched. Too tall. Too short. Too heavy. While all the men looked alike in their dirty coveralls and blackened faces, none of them remotely resembled Linc.

  Her stomach tensed and her chest burned as she held her breath. Tears flowed and men hugged women, children and each other. Slowly, the crowd thinned as families left. Surely she’d find him soon. Or he’d find her.

  Lord knew she longed for that instant when she’d see him, recognize him. Would he hug her tightly? She wouldn’t even care if the mine soot ruined her clothes. Or would he simply look at her with that painful silence and turn away as he had so many times lately?

  She didn’t care right now. She just wanted him here, safe. She couldn’t be his wife anymore, but she didn’t want him hurt, either.

  Still, he didn’t appear.

  The fluorescent lights overhead dimmed. The noise of the crowd faded.

  He wasn’t coming. She knew it. Knew deep down inside that he was with that ill-fated crew.

  “Oh, God,” she whispered and felt the bench come up to meet her. She wanted to bury her face in her hands and weep but didn’t dare, just in case she missed him.

  “Daddy!” Miranda’s high-pitched squeal shattered the din. Miranda’s father, grungy and filthy, swept her up in his arms. She giggled despite the smudge of black he left on her cheek where he kissed her.

  “Daddy, did you help Ms. Holmes’s husband?”

  He frowned in confusion.

  “Oh, sweetie.” Julia stood again and reached out to stop the girl’s words before they could rush out, but Miranda wasn’t having any of that.

  “Your husband?” Mr. Olsen—Julia couldn’t remember his first name at the moment—looked at her in confusion, then as recognition dawned, he frowned. “Is he down there?”

  She couldn’t speak. All she could manage was a shrug. She longed for the days when a daddy could fix all the world’s problems.

  “We’re going back down, ma’am.”

  “Ben, no.” His wife held tight to his hand, snuggled up against his side and laid her head on his shoulder.

  “You know that’s how we do it,” he whispered.

  Tears in her eyes, the woman nodded. “I know.”

  Julia looked at the small family, her longing so thick it nearly stopped her heart from beating. She wanted a family of her own, but right now she was far away from having anything close to that.

  “Holmes, right? He’s the inspector?” Ben’s voice broke into her thoughts. “He’s a good guy. Not like some inspectors. He’s fair. We’ll get him out.”

  She believed him. Linc would do the exact same thing. That look of determination in Ben’s eyes was identical to the one she saw so often on Linc’s face.

  How had she missed that?

  She swallowed hard and sat back down before she fell over. She watched the Olsen family leave. Miranda and her mother turned toward home, comfortable in the knowledge their husband and father was safe. Ben turned back to the mine to help find the others. Find Linc.

  Just before the door closed, Julia saw Ben pull his wife close and kiss her long and deep.

  She wanted to tear her gaze away, but she couldn’t. An ache grew in her throat and she tried to remember the last time she’d been kissed like that.

  She couldn’t remember.

  What was wrong with her that she couldn’t stay in love with her husband? The thought hit her hard. Did she even love Linc anymore? She missed being held and loved and the company. She hated being alone. But did she actually miss him?

  She didn’t miss the anger and the frustration that came with waking up each morning.

  “Mrs. Holmes?” A neatly dressed young woman touched Julia’s shoulder, interrupting her thoughts. “Hello,” the woman said softly, not waiting for Julia to respond, as if she feared Julia might break from the sound of her voice. “I’m Elizabeth Wilson.”

  Julia stared at her.

  Elizabeth must have realized Julia wasn’t going to, or couldn’t, speak. “I’m a counselor. I thought maybe you’d like some company.” Without waiting for an invitation, the woman sat down beside Julia.

  That’s when Julia’s hope slipped. Linc was trapped underground. Perhaps even—she nearly retched at the thought—perhaps even dead.

  She looked around at the suddenly surreal world. Few families remained. Those still seated had bleak, pained looks on their faces. She recognized Rita, Ryan’s mother, the woman who’d spoken to her only a few hours ago at the grocery store. She saw Rita’s husband and daughter-in-law, Rachel.

  Julia’s heart ached. Rachel Sinclair’s presence meant that both brothers were down there with Linc.

  She saw Shirley Wise and her heart rate increased a bit with hope. It felt a bit better knowing Gabe was with him. It was common knowledge around town that Gabe Wise was one of the most experienced miners. If anyone knew that mine, he did.

  She didn’t recognize the others but she did recognize their pain, their anguish.

  Suddenly, just as before, the doors slammed open. No miners entered this time.

  A group of men wearing suits came in and closed the doors behind them. She recognized the mine superintendent and a couple of other management types, but most of the frowning men were strangers to her. An uncomfortable feeling settled in her chest, and she knew she’d be getting to know them all too well.

  Never before had she felt so trapped. She rebelled against it and stood. She wanted to leave, to run away, but knew she wouldn’t. Couldn’t leave without knowing what had happened.

  “Who are they?” she asked the woman beside her, the counselor whose name she’d already forgotten.

  The woman didn’t answer. She simply stood and put her arm around Julia’s shoulders.

  Julia jerked away. “Don’t touch me. Don’t patronize me. Just answer me. Is my husband dead?”

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Thursday Afternoon, Three and a Half Hours Underground

  LINC FELT RATHER THAN SAW Ryan scoot down beside him.

  “What will they do after the vent shaft is done? How are they gonna get us out through that pile?” The kid tilted his head toward the caved-in exit.

  “I’m not sure. There’s a couple of options.” At least he hoped so. “They’ll lower a camera first, then a listening device and something to test the air. Don’t worry. They are trying to find us.” He didn’t add that the rescue teams were probably still trying to figure out if they were even alive. “Hopefully,
they’ll pump in the fresh air first.”

  Ryan coughed as if on cue to show how bad the air had become. “That’d be good.” He didn’t say anything else but didn’t move away, either.

  “Relax. Breathe slow,” Linc prompted. They all carried a self-contained breathing apparatus as part of their emergency kits. It gave them a limited amount of good air and no one wanted to waste it. So far, Linc’s meter had been clear of any readings for toxic gas, but the dust made it difficult to take a clean breath. He kept a close eye on the gauge.

  Linc waited until Ryan had relaxed before he spoke again. “Something on your mind?”

  “Uh, yeah. I been thinking. About stuff. ’Bout school. Mrs. Holmes is gonna be mighty pissed at us, huh?”

  Linc almost laughed. He was pretty sure that was how Julia felt about him most of the time. His gut tightened as he thought about the hell the families must be going through. Part of him hoped Julia wasn’t up there, that she’d managed to stay untouched by this. The selfish part of him prayed she was waiting for him. “Why do you say that?” He focused on Ryan instead.

  “She was so mad when I told her I was quitting school.”

  “Yeah, I know. Why exactly did you quit?”

  “You aren’t going to get on my case, too, are you?”

  “No. Just curious.” He was more than curious, but he knew better than to push. Ryan was the only one talking at the moment and Linc didn’t want to lose this connection, no matter how tenuous it might be, to Julia.

  In the dim light, Linc thought he saw the boy shrug. “I was having a tough time.”

  “Like how? Kids picking on you?”

  “No!” Ryan looked over at Linc as if he might clam up. His denial was a bit too vehement, but Linc let it pass.

  He waited for Ryan to continue.

  “Math was kicking my butt. Mrs. Holmes kept trying to convince me I could do it. Said I just needed help, but that didn’t work too well.”

  Something in the young miner’s voice told Linc that the attempt had caused more problems than it solved. He chuckled. “She ought to know.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “She won’t like me telling you.” He almost didn’t, but realized he wanted to talk about her. “She hated math in school. Flunked it twice in college.”

  He should be thankful for Julia’s lack of math skills. Even when she kept her distance from him, it provided an excuse for her to ask him for help, though he honestly believed she could do it if she had more faith in her abilities. Too many abysmal failures, though, had left a deep mark.

  “She said someone helped her in school.”

  “Yeah. I did.” Linc smiled and leaned his head back against the hard rock. God, it felt good to remember and leave this dark, damp place for a moment.

  He recalled the study sessions that had run late into the night. Her laughter. The frustration she’d expressed when she didn’t understand. They’d grown close so quickly over those months. Was that why it had fallen apart just as quickly now?

  “You’ve known her a long time?” The tone of Ryan’s voice changed.

  “Yeah. Since first grade. We went to school together.”

  “See!” Ryan leaned over toward his brother.

  “Oh, here we go.” Mike’s voice came out of the darkness and Linc could almost hear the older brother roll his eyes.

  “Shut up, Mike,” Ryan said.

  “What’s going on?” Linc couldn’t let Ryan’s comment go without a response.

  “Nothing,” Ryan whispered.

  “It doesn’t sound like nothing. You got a question to ask? Do it.” Something was bothering Ryan and he seemed to want to talk to Linc. Maybe it was because Linc was a stranger, or maybe because he was the only option at the moment. The others didn’t seem too concerned with him.

  “They all think I’m trouble.” Ryan tilted his head to the group as a whole.

  “Why?”

  “’Cause I’m just a kid to them.”

  He was just a kid, but Linc realized there was no turning back now. Ryan had left his childhood behind the day he’d stepped through the mouth of this mine.

  “When they reach us, getting out of here isn’t going to be easy, you know,” Linc offered. “We have to work together.”

  “If they reach us, you mean.” Ryan’s mood had deteriorated into seventeen-year-old attitude.

  “No. When. Hey, look, you’ve got the edge on us all.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Linc suddenly wished Julia was here to advise him. She knew how to deal with these kids. He hadn’t a clue. He hadn’t been seventeen in a very long time.

  “What do you mean?” Ryan repeated, more of that attitude returning to coat his words.

  “When the mine caved in at Sago, the lone survivor was the youngest of the group,” Linc said softly. Ryan didn’t immediately reply.

  “Why do you think that happened?”

  “Partly because the others looked after him, thinking he was young and needed taking care of.” Linc knew that wasn’t going to thrill Ryan, even if it was true. “But also because he had more resilience and reserves. His body did better without air for a longer time.”

  Bodies shuffled and a soft snore came out of the darkness. Linc knew Ryan was thinking, he just wasn’t sure what about.

  “Linc?”

  “Yeah,”

  “When you were my age did you know what love was?”

  Linc managed to swallow his initial shock. “Uh, yeah. I think so.” Oh, good. He was messing this up, he was sure of it.

  Looking back, though, he realized he wasn’t lying. He had loved Julia, even back then, even before they’d gotten together in college. “Lord, you make me feel old, kid.” He’d been in love with Julia for most of his adult life. Where had the time gone?

  “You’re not old. You’re younger than my dad.”

  “Thanks. I think.”

  “Hey, that’s not an insult. My dad’s not horrible. He’s just—”

  “Be glad you’ve got him, kid. My dad died when I was sixteen. I never really got to tell him how I felt, and I certainly didn’t get the chance to talk to him as an adult.” Linc couldn’t remember the last time he’d let himself think about his father, and he knew he’d never admitted that to anyone, including himself.

  Something clattered in the darkness, startling them both. Ryan gave a nervous laugh and stood, as if looking for an escape from the conversation. “I’ll go see what that was.”

  “Ryan, wait—” Linc leaned over to stop him but missed. “Don’t go far,” he called after him.

  “Give up, man.” Mike’s voice came out of the dark. He’d obviously overheard their conversation. “Ry doesn’t listen to anyone.”

  Linc laughed. “What seventeen-year-old does?”

  “Fair enough.” Mike chuckled, as well. It was good to hear the other man’s voice without the overwhelming fear and concern in it. They all knew he was worried about his wife, Rachel. He’d spoken some about his parents, but mostly it had been about Rachel. Linc had met the shy woman a couple of times around town. She was pregnant with their first child, and Mike feared this would be too hard on her.

  “You think he’s too young to be in love?”

  “He’s only seventeen.”

  “How old are you, Mike?” Link had a vague idea but he wanted to hear the other man admit it.

  “Twenty. Yeah, I know. Not much older, and I’ve been married almost two years. But I—”

  “Feel older?”

  “Yeah. Especially right now. When Rachel and I first got married, I thought we were on top of the world and could do anything we wanted.” Linc remembered that feeling. Suddenly his mind filled with memories from his own wedding day. He couldn’t remember a time in his life he’d been that nervous. That had scared him even more than being stuck down here did.

  “But? What happened?”

  “Life happened, man. We didn’t exactly plan to have kids so soon. She’s been going to
college at night. She wants to be a nurse.” Mike’s pride exploded in the cavern. “She can’t do that if I’m not there to help her.” His pride vanished and fear took its place.

  “Don’t sell her short.” Linc had always thought Julia couldn’t survive without him. That damned male ego she was always accusing him of having. Okay, he was a guy. He knew that. He liked it. She was disgustingly right, though. She’d apparently done fine without him this week, as she hadn’t come home, and that knowledge made him ache.

  “When Rachel got pregnant she was actually mad at me for a week.” Mike didn’t sound like that bothered him too much. “But she got over it once she realized we were actually going to have a baby.” His voice hitched.

  “Until the morning sickness hit,” Linc offered, then realized what he’d just confessed.

  “Didn’t know you had kids.”

  Linc swallowed the pain in his throat. “We…we don’t. Julia miscarried. Five months along.” They’d never discussed it with anyone outside of her family.

  “Man, that’s tough.” Mike’s voice came out way too soft. Linc had to change the topic or Mike was going to fall back into that depression he’d felt earlier.

  “Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?” Linc asked, knowing that wasn’t what he’d meant to say. “Boy.”

  “That they’re going to name after me,” Ryan yelled from the other side of the cavern.

  “Quit eavesdropping, brother.”

  “I can’t help it.” Ryan reappeared. “We’re sorta stuck here together.”

  The brotherly banter made Linc smile. His own brother had left years ago, and he hadn’t heard from him since. He missed it, he realized, thinking back on the years before his dad died. When they’d played together, teased each other, been a family.

  Was that what Julia had wanted? The thought surprised him. He’d never bothered to ask her. And she’d never bothered to tell him. Or maybe he hadn’t been listening.

  He closed his eyes and, for the first time since the cave-in, let himself picture her as she had been back when he’d decided to act on his longtime attraction to her. He remembered it all so clearly. They’d been walking across campus that day. Tiny snowflakes had fallen from the leaden clouds and landed softly in her hair. He’d been fascinated by the sight. Even now his fingers itched to reach out and touch the thick copper-gold curls.

 

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