by Piper Stone
“Why were you snooping? You didn’t believe me when I told you what happened?”
The tone of his voice had such intense anger, a raw and almost savage nature. She back-pedaled, fearful of where this was going. “I threw away trash and just noticed it. The cracks and the way the glass was broken couldn’t have occurred from being dropped. I know you’re hurting inside. I understand that—”
“You understand nothing, Cooper!” he interrupted, raking his fingers through his hair. “Nothing. I told you I have nightmares, fears from being in that Godawful place. If you want to know stories, then I can tell you about the desert, the heat that never ends, sweltering until your skin feels like it’s going to peel away. You spend half your days planning an attack and the other half engaged in one. There’s so much bloodshed, people’s lives lost and everywhere you look, all you can see is despair. There is no possible way that you could understand anything. Just leave me alone. Okay?”
“Fine. Happy to leave you very much alone.” She was floored, but not by the words he’d spouted, but from the vehemence in the way he’d issued them. Veins bulged at the side of his neck, his eyes wide open, his mouth twisted. He was not the same man who’d been so engaging, loving during last night and dinner, jokes and... A single tear slipped past her lashes and she shook her head several times. The bastard! How could he do this? “You know what? You’re right. I couldn’t know anything about pain, about monsters trying their best to destroy you. Nothing. Fuck you, Rex Sullivan. Be alone and lonely.” There was no need to flash back to the horror she’d experienced, or the degradation of the woman inside, the same kind of man was standing right in front of her.
Before he could stop her, she raced back into the house, the glass almost tumbling out of her hand in her effort to grab her purse. The moment she stood on the front porch, staring at his truck, she wiped her eyes, disgusted with herself. She slunk against the siding, folding her arms.
In the dimming light, she studied the ranch. Why was life so damn complicated?
The door creaked then his boots hit the deck. Rex kept his distance, his hands in his pockets.
She studied his tense figure, his uneven breathing and willed him to say anything. A single word. But he said nothing. After what had to be three full minutes, she couldn’t take the tension any longer. “Take me home. I’m giving you all the alone time you need, buster.”
He exhaled but remained quiet.
“Did you hear me?” Cooper demanded.
“Yep. I heard you. We’re not finished yet.”
“Oh, the big he-man says so, huh?” She laughed before mumbling under her breath. The man was infuriating. Arrogant. A pig. He was also determined to wait her out. Well, fuck him. “If you can’t trust me, then what are we doing? Why the hell are we wasting each other’s time? Good sex?”
“Cooper, I do trust you. Why do you think I bothered in the first place? I think you were the only person I trusted all those years ago as well. There’s no reason why, but our connection was so strong that I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Still can’t. Do you know that I kept a picture of you in my locker overseas?”
The words were shocking. “No. Really? Why?”
He darted a look over his shoulder, shrugging. “You were my shining star and a reminder why I had to get back home.”
Cooper walked closer. “PTSD?” Just asking the question could derail everything, but she had to ask. To her surprise, he nodded once but kept his temper in check. “The medical bills are yours, aren’t they?” Please talk to me. Please. The second round of quiet was almost too much to bear. “I shouldn’t have snooped, but the invoices were lying on the counter. I thought at first they were about your dad.”
“You are one resourceful lady,” he whispered, looking away. “Yeah, they’re all mine. My father has an entire satchel full of his own bills, including shit the medical insurance won’t pay that I have to contend with.”
Even in the dimness, she could clearly see a faraway look in his eyes. Whatever he’d endured had been extremely traumatic.
“Don’t be angry with me. I care about you already, Rex. I guess I never stopped. I was just so angry when you left without so much as saying goodbye.”
Exhaling, he kept his eyes pinned on her. “I feel that in the way you kiss me and your touch. Goodbyes are tough on me, eating me up inside.”
A full fifteen seconds passed, the silence almost eating her alive.
“I’m sorry I exploded. You don’t deserve that shit. The lingering effects of being overseas for three tours finally took a toll. I’m not the same man I was when I left here.”
“We all change. I’m not making light of your situation or what you endured, but no one stays carefree like when they were kids. All the dreams. We were fearless back then, ready to take on the world.” She almost wished they could go back and start again.
“I guess that’s one of the reasons I signed up for the Marines. I was hungry to serve my country, don’t get me wrong, but I was the aggressive kid. Dad and I didn’t get along and I wanted to kick some mother fuckin’ enemy ass as well as get the hell out of what I thought was a lousy town.” He laughed, the sound bitter. “I know, no cursing.”
“I think I might forgive you. Just this once.”
“Well, I appreciate that, princess.”
Cooper leaned against the railing, wishing the tension would go away. “Lubbock isn’t so bad. I hadn’t realized how much I missed the beautiful countryside, the bright blue skies.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean. You don’t realize what you have until it’s gone,” Rex muttered. “So, what’s your story? Why are you terrified to get back out on the job market?”
“Maybe because I was fired from my previous job.”
“Ouch,” he muttered. “I know you’re good at what you do.”
“You have no idea what I do, but thank you,” she mused. “Advertising. I create funny and quirky ads for various products. The first employer said I had a fresh look on commercialism. I had a bright future. Then I was gone a little over a year later. The second was a brute as an employer, but he taught me a lot about what not to do. I was close to the first employer. He was brilliant, easy to like. The second was more... difficult.” She looked away, clenching her fists.
“What happened?”
“A lot of things actually, but when I started asking questions all the time and suggesting changes, being me as you might imagine, he fired me. I thought I had a future there. I loved living in St. Louis. I had a cute little apartment. Then one day out of the blue, poof. Everything was gone. I walked in and there was a letter on my desk. Sure, there were hyped-up reasons but the one I’ll never forget was his statement of a total lack of regard or respect to the profession. Up your ass, Mr. Jameson. Oops!” A giggle surfaced, followed by her eyes opening wide.
“Now, I’ll forgive you.” His expression shifted, full of exhaustion, his shoulders slumping. “I don’t want to hurt you in any manner. Ever. I didn’t stay in the bed last night because of the night terrors. What if I physically hurt you?”
“You won’t,” she whispered, her heart aching.
“You don’t know that. I’ve broken more than a few glasses over the last few months. Punched a few walls, came damn close to totaling a rental car.”
She closed the distance, pressing the back of her hand against his cheek. “You didn’t say or do anything that disturbed me. I can’t imagine what you had to face, what any soldier is required to experience. I meant what I said earlier. I’m so proud of you, but you have to face your anger. Maybe I can help you.”
“That’s all I’ve been trying to do for months now. Anger management. Controlling my emotions. Fighting the inner demons. I’ve had every concept thrown at me by several respected doctors and all with grandiose ideas about how to fix me. I’ve tried pills, shots, acupuncture, exercise. Hell, even did a stint with meditation. I had enough of the crap. Nothing takes for long, but being back here, at home is where I should be, where I should
have been. With my father. Even though he seems to hate me still after all this time.”
“Your father doesn’t hate you. No fathers hate their children. I have no doubt he’s proud of you. You have to know that.”
Rex kicked his boot against the bottom railing, wrinkling his brow. “Truth is, I have no idea what he really thinks. When I signed up, things were already bad around here. I realize now he expected I’d take over the grueling work, leaving him time to hunt new business so of course, he didn’t want me to go. He also didn’t think I could cut it as a soldier. We argued for days, and I never said goodbye.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. I thought I knew better about everything. I was a damn fool. What’s worse is that after the first tour, I didn’t come back here. I stayed away on purpose. Spent six weeks in Puerto Rico with a buddy from the same unit. We stayed at his parents’ house. Tended some bar, drank too much. Pretended I didn’t have another life. When the second tour ended, I came home and within two weeks I left. More arguments, more nasty innuendoes. By then I didn’t even care about the ranch, although all I had to do was look around to see just how horrible the situation had gotten. Dad and I could never get along after Mom died. She was the glue between us, as she liked to say.”
“Sounds a little like my family. Mom and I aren’t close, not really. I’m Daddy’s princess, and don’t you dare make fun of me.”
“’Cause you are a princess,” he chortled.
“I should smack you around, you know.” She gave him a heated look. “Mom and I are like oil and water. She has her life and mostly it has nothing to do with my father. Soirées and luncheons. She volunteers for several organizations. I think she just doesn’t want to spend any time around my father. And I know they’re having tough times too, but everything is rosy around me, just like a Hallmark movie. God, I hate that channel.”
“That’s really sad.”
“But life is very much that way.” She glanced up at the stars, remembering her dreams as a child. A white knight, a beautiful steed providing a safe passage to a world full of light and love. Glancing at the few stars she was able to see, she could almost hear the sweet lullaby she’d said during the barbeque. Maybe she was a fool trying to find a new dream. All her ideals had been tossed away after a single night. Karma seemed to have a funny way of making her face her fears. At least a hunky cowboy was right in the middle of it.
“What do you want in a man? Ifn’ you don’t mind me askin’.”
She heard the quiet reserve, as well as the heavier twang in his voice and smiled to herself. How the hell did she even know? “Real love. If that even exists. I guess I was that little girl who believed in love at first sight, the kind of adoration that could last forever. I admit, I’m more old-fashioned that all those girls who think beating a man at everything is the way to go.”
“So, you like beatings instead,” he teased.
Punching him in the gut, she issued a playful growl.
“Watch it, girlie. I’ll bend you over this railing and blister your ass.”
She had never felt so safe near anyone, not even her father. “I guess I just want the fairy tale. A strong man, a home, kids. You know the drill.”
“I understand.”
“I know, life is a pain in the ass and I need to change my thinking. Right?”
“Not always or at least you shouldn’t have to. You deserve to achieve everything you want. We all do. Granted, life is difficult. I’ll give you that. Things get thrown at you when you least expect them. Dad has colon cancer, stage three. Came on so fast. The doctors aren’t certain how long he has to live. The guilt is crushing, especially since I’m not sure how to save the ranch. If I’d only been here,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “And I feel like I’m losing the battle after fighting the war. If that makes any sense.”
The sadness enveloping him wasn’t fake nor could he disguise the anguish buried so deep in his soul. He seemed like a haunted little boy, trying to make up for lost time. “I’m so sorry, Rex and that makes perfectly good sense. One day at a time. Try to keep in mind, your father is a proud and stubborn man, just like his son, but he is well aware and happy you’re here. I’m certain that gives him some comfort at least. And I’m glad you’re home and safe.” Safe. The word seemed strange, almost foreign. She watched his range of emotions, the way he was fighting with every aspect of his life. God, she was falling so hard for this man, and no matter the obstacles, she wanted nothing more than to be by his side. The thought gave her an intense round of quivers.
He gripped the railing, following her gaze, his eyes dancing as he drank in the stars.
“What kind of woman do you want?” The question wasn’t easy to ask, and she wasn’t certain why.
“Hmmm... Never really thought about it. I guess someone who is real, not a game player. I hate those made-up women who hide behind their careers, pushing so hard. I want truthfulness always, no matter what life brings our way. I just can’t handle deception or lies. That’s a deal-breaker. And I want a real family with a little house, a yard. A dog or two. Maybe kids one day.”
Cooper was hanging on every word, her imagination getting the better of her.
“I want a brat I can tame and punish at all times.”
When he didn’t chuckle, laugh, or otherwise state he was teasing, she moved so she could look into his eyes. “You really are serious?”
Rex issued a big, fat grin. “Well, at least halfway. I am that kind of old-fashioned guy too. I believe the man should be in charge, head of the household, but I don’t buy that women are supposed to be barefoot and pregnant.”
“Well, thank God for small favors,” she chortled, rolling her eyes so he could see.
“Hmm...” he muttered as he swatted her ass. “But I do believe that women thrive with discipline and rules.”
“Discipline.”
“Hard. Spankings.” He kept the grin on his face.
She heard the conviction in his voice and sighed, almost melting from his roughhewn tone alone. Could she dare live this kind of life and with this man? “I kinda like that, cowboy.”
He leaned closer, whispering in her ear, “But you’re still a brat.”
“So you say.”
They stood quietly for another few minutes.
“Do you still want me to take you home?”
She eased her arm around his waist. “No. I’d like to stay, if you’ll have me.”
He crushed her against his chest. “Truth is, I’d like to keep you forever, princess. Maybe like a perfect china doll in a little pink dress.”
“You’re really going to have something to worry about if you keep calling me princess. And you know I don’t like anything frilly. Or did you forget?”
“I remember almost everything about you.”
“Almost?”
Cupping both sides of her face, his hold was strong, captivating. He brushed his thumbs across her skin, a deep rumble in his throat. “I do, and lady, I want to learn everything else about you. Absolutely everything.” Lowering his head, he brushed his lips across hers, open-mouthing the kiss, the action subtle.
The kiss was electrifying, fueling a fire that would never cease. She gripped his wrists, moaning, parting her lips as he dragged his tongue around her mouth. Current rushed through every cell in her body until her pulse raced, her heart thumping. She clung to him, arching her back and rising onto her tiptoes.
Sliding his arm around her waist, he yanked her close, running his other hand up and down her back. He plunged his tongue inside, tasting her, exploring the dark recesses of her mouth.
The simple feel of his throbbing shaft pushing against her was a powerful aphrodisiac, leaving her unable to focus or think clearly. As the passion roared between them, spinning them both out of control, she surrendered to him, to this man who had already stolen her heart.
Rex picked her up into his arms, swinging her around in a full circle, the kiss continuing.
&nbs
p; When their lips separated she panted, trying to catch her breath. “God, I want you.”
“You have no idea how much I want you.” He kissed her eyelids and nose, laughing softly as he took two single strides toward the house, fumbling to twist the handle and just when he was able to turn the knob, he kicked in the door.
“Rex,” she gasped them laughed with him. She’d never felt so small before, so taken care of. In his arms she was safe and protected and there was no place she would rather be.
Issuing a low-slung growl, he kicked the door shut before heading straight for the kitchen.
Cooper looked past his arm, curious as to what he was doing. When he bent slightly, raking his arm across the kitchen table, she was taken aback. “You’re crazy.” Various papers and envelopes flew off, scattering toward the floor. She watched as they fell in slow motion, her panties just about as wet as they could be. Her nipples ached, a twinge of pain morphing into a wave of desire.
“You ain’t seen nothing yet, sugar. I’m going to take you anywhere I want, any time.” His eyes twinkled as he eased her onto her feet, immediately wrangling with her dress, tugging it up and over her shoulders. He cupped her naked breasts, growling as he lowered his head. As he sucked on one he pinched the other, twisting her hardened bud between his thumb and forefinger.
The waning evening sunlight filtered in through the bay window, illuminating the kitchen table and she tossed her head, reaching back until she was able to grab the edge of the table. As he licked and sucked, taking his time to drag the tip of his tongue around in lazy circles, she inhaled, holding her breath.
“I love your breasts, your sweet titties,” he whispered in a hoarse voice, the sound guttural. “I’m going to lick every inch of you.”
She kept her back arched, her head hanging low as the pain increased and she loved every second, wanting him to pluck her nipples, twisting until she cried out. “Oh... Yes...”
He eased the flat of his hand down her stomach, inch by inch, taking his time, until he reached her lace-covered mound. Shimmying his hand up and down in a rapid motion, he moved his mouth back and forth from one nipple to the other.
