I kept myself from looking at the lights below. Since Marcus could control me even from afar, he likely had a connection through my mind that allowed him to see what I saw, but I didn’t know if he was watching all the time or only when he needed to. Was he watching now? A shiver raked me. I’d left him. He was watching so he could bring me back. I had to make sure I didn’t disclose our location.
A snort caused me to look up, then quickly turn away. Darrien and Jahlem had arrived.
“Nakari went to find lodging,” I said, keeping my gaze on the snow at my feet. From the corner of my eye, I watched them dismount. Jahlem moved closer, and I stepped to the side.
“You can’t come near me, Jahlem,” I said. “You’ve already been hurt once because of me.” At least Jahlem’s injury hadn’t ended in death, like poor Skylar.
“And I’d do it again, Cheyenne,” Jahlem said quietly, guessing at my thoughts. “All of us, including Skylar, came into this battle knowing some of us wouldn’t make it. He sacrificed himself so you could live.”
Tears brimmed near the surface of my eyes.
“But he wasn’t supposed to,” I replied, my throat growing tight. “He was never supposed to die, and especially not by my hand.”
I pressed my eyes closed, the tears falling once more. Skylar was supposed to have left me alone. He was supposed to have lost his faith in me.
“He didn’t die in vain,” Jahlem added. “He believed in you, as we do, as all who have fallen before us have. We’ve waited too long for our freedom. We’ll do whatever we must to protect it.”
I didn’t answer.
“There are vacant cabins at the edge of the forest,” Nakari said, returning somewhat winded. “They’re closed for the winter, and no one seems to be nearby. There’s also a corral with other horses a few miles away. We can drop these two off there. I’m sure the owners won’t mind gaining a few of Marcus’s prized stallions.”
She jumped beside me.
“I’m going to take Cheyenne down first, then we can head towards the corral.”
Nakari’s hand latched onto my braid again, and we jumped down to the ravine below. I kept my eyes on the snow. I had no idea if any signs were posted; I didn’t want Marcus to see where we were hiding.
The wind stopped, and the white snow below my feet turned red; a red carpet.
“See if you can get a fire started,” Nakari said and then disappeared.
A fine mist passed over my lips, I wasn’t sure if it was colder in here or outside. I began my search for a fireplace. A potbelly stove sat in the corner of the small cabin. A wooden crate nearby was filled with firewood.
I dumped the logs into the stove and rubbed my hands together. Warmth began to spread in my palms, and I pulsed out the flames till the wood ignited. I kept them steady until the familiar glow of orange and red appeared. I closed the stove and glanced around.
Nakari had found a vacation cabin. A small kitchenette sat beyond the entry door, and beyond that, another door lead to a small bathroom with a tub. A couch and rocking chair surrounded the potbelly stove, with a coffee table loaded with pamphlets and magazines, and a red rug underneath.
I moved further into the living room and found two doors leading to bedrooms, each with a double bed. At least they could get some rest and stay warm. I could make myself at home on the couch, just in case any sudden fiery powers burst forth without warning.
A knock at the door caused me to still. Nakari would’ve just jumped in…
“Cheyenne, it’s me, Darrien,” a voice said.
I went to the door, opening it and letting Darrien in. I quickly averted my eyes and moved to the kitchen. A small dining table with three chairs was in the corner. I sat, trying to avoid looking around.
From the corner of my eye, I watched Darrien warm himself by the fire. A few moments later, Jahlem and Nakari arrived.
I closed my eyes, afraid Marcus would suddenly summon my powers and use them against us. I had to maintain what little control I had as long as I could.
“We need to find food,” Darrien said.
Light footsteps echoed in the small space, and then I heard paper being turned. Nakari was searching through the papers I’d seen on the coffee table, probably advertising the shops and such in the local towns.
“There are several stores within miles of here,” Nakari said. “I’ll get food, and from the looks of it, all of us need a change of clothes. I’ll be back in a few hours.”
A breeze drifted on my neck. Nakari stood behind me, but didn’t speak. She sighed, and then another breeze touched my skin. She’d gone.
She’d wanted to say something to me, but at the last moment had changed her mind. Now it was my turn to sigh. She probably wanted to tell me to run away, to hide and never be seen again. Or better yet, she wanted to remind me that I’d been the one to murder Skylar while he lay helplessly on the ground.
There was no confusion over Skylar’s death like Daniel’s; I’d witnessed it with my own eyes. I’d been the one to yank the golden whip back. I’d also been the one to check for a pulse and find none…
Heavy footsteps moved around the small space, and I inched myself closer to the wall, leaning against it.
“Here it is,” Darrien said. “Just look for some matches so I can light the water heater.”
More footsteps sounded, and then the front door opened. I fought to keep my eyes closed; I wanted to know what they were doing. I wanted to have the freedoms I’d taken for granted, but I knew I’d likely never have them again. It would always be this way now, me cowering in the corner, afraid to look at my surroundings, afraid I’d become a weapon again.
The front door opened and closed again, and the cold air floated around me.
“I found the main water valve,” Jahlem said. “Give the tank a few hours to heat up.”
They were trying to make it comfortable here for us. But we couldn’t stay here for long. Where could we go?
An old clock ticking settled in my ears. Tick-tock, tick-tock…I repeated the steady rhythm in my head, trying to forget about all my failures. I’d been useless from the moment I’d met Callon. I hadn’t wanted to follow his directions; I wanted to walk my own path. A path that led me to Marcus, a path I thought I’d understood, but hadn’t at all. And the one person I needed the most had left. No one had been able to find him, because he didn’t want to be found.
I hadn’t moved from my perch, I hadn’t even opened my eyes, but I knew time had passed. I’d heard it with every chime that sounded. Nakari returned after two loud clicks sounded, clicks that I figured were hours.
Plastic bags crinkled and dropped to the floor. I jumped.
“I think we’ll be safe here for a day or so,” she said.
A plastic bag crunched.
“We’re farther out of town than I thought, but this is a good thing. The chances of anyone coming to these cottages are slim. They’re closed for the winter.”
“Good,” Darrien replied. “The more we can keep out of sight the better.”
“But what do we do now? We can’t keep hiding. We need to return to your family,” Jahlem said. “We need to get Cheyenne to someone who can help her.”
“I’m beyond help,” I said quietly. “No one forced me to marry him. It was my choice, and I made a mistake.”
Soft footsteps neared.
“If I hadn’t been born, then all this heartache wouldn’t have happened.”
The words came from my lips before I had time to stop them. I hadn’t meant for anyone to hear them. I’d only just thought them. But it was what I felt right now—I was a failure who’d be better off not existing.
“You can’t say that, Cheyenne,” Nakari protested. “You don’t get to make that admission now!” She began pacing behind me. “We’d been fighting for a long time, fighting and not going anywhere, until you came along. Then we finally had hope, and even though you haven’t succeeded yet, it’s still something.”
“You have hope in me? N
ow you have hope in me?” I stood up, the chair squealing in protest, and my gaze met hers. I didn’t care if Marcus saw her. “Why now? Why couldn’t you have given me a chance when we arrived at the mine? Why have you been shunning me along with everyone else?!”
I clenched my teeth, the crimson beast rising. My breaths became heavier, and I felt power rising within.
“You’ve despised me since the moment we met!”
I stalked closer to her, as she backed up. She lifted her hands as if she were going to push me back, but stilled. Why hadn’t she jumped? Tears filled her eyes, and her head lowered. Darrien and Jahlem inched closer to her. My chest heaved from the beast’s anger.
“You’re right,” she whispered. “I—I never gave you a chance. I’m sorry.”
I blinked.
“I couldn’t see beyond my jealousy. It wasn’t until Andre’s words took hold that I understood what I’d done to you.” She closed her eyes, tears trailing down her cheeks. “You and I are more alike than you know, and I didn’t want to see that. I didn’t want a connection with you. I wanted to despise you—hate you for all that you took away from me, but I can’t.”
She stepped closer, taking my hands in hers.
“My mother, she hated herself, hated fate for bringing her into this world. She hated being Timeless, living for eons only to see those she cared about perish. She abandoned everything—our clan, our home—and then one day I came home to find that she’d killed herself.” She paused. “I was only fourteen. I was alone, abandoned by a mother that never knew how to love.”
She swallowed, and her lower lip quivered.
“I fought back at first, fought to cling to a life, a world, that didn’t want me. Six months after her death, six months of living in hell, six months of resigning myself to be a failure, I decided I was no better than she was. All the failures added up, and I stood atop a bridge, staring into the watery grave below. I was about to jump when a voice stopped me. Koda. He found me, talked me down, and saved me.
“I was Timeless and didn’t know it, just like you. He adopted me into the Silloquize clan, took me into his own home, and gave me the love of a family. He gave me hope when I had none. He picked me up, and gave me a second chance. He taught me that love has no strings attached, and the love of a family runs deep.
“You gave us hope where there was none, Cheyenne. You’re family, and the love of a family runs deep. All I’m asking for is a second chance. A second chance to prove to you that we are family, that I believe in you, and that not all hope is lost.”
I couldn’t believe how wrong I’d been. Nakari wanted to make amends for her past actions. She wanted me to be a part of the family; she and I had a connection. We’d both grown up not knowing our heritage, both wished our lives had been different. She had faith and hope in me.
“I—I’m sorry,” I whispered.
She drew me into a hug, both of us holding on tight. The past was washed away. We were starting fresh. No more jealousy or bitterness.
She pulled back, a faint smile rising. I smiled in return, and for the first time in a long time I felt a burden lift. Nakari and I could work together now. The past was the past.
“Right,” she said, glancing at Darrien and Jahlem and wiping the tears from her cheeks. “I got us some dinner, and we all need to get cleaned up and rest.”
I moved towards the front window, staring out at the snowflakes falling. Where we were going or what we were going to do next was unclear. When Marcus would strike again was unknown, but keeping my attention away from them until I could control my powers was a must.
Jahlem and Darrien moved to the right of me. From the corner of my eye I watched them stare.
“Have you felt your power rising since your battle in the meadow?” Darrien asked.
I lifted my hands, turning them back and forth. Now that I thought about it, I hadn’t felt any rise in my powers since leaving Marcus, but that didn’t mean it couldn’t happen at any time. He’d shown me that while at the mine. He didn’t always strike, only when he wanted to.
“No, but that doesn’t mean it can’t happen.”
“He loses power when he controls you, Cheyenne,” Jahlem said. “You saw him collapse in the meadow.”
I stilled, thinking back to the battle. When I’d gone after him for killing Skylar, he was on his hands and knees. He was winded like he’d just fought the battle himself.
“When he controlled your powers at the mine previously, how far apart were the episodes?” Darrien asked.
My mind began to whirl. Yes, the episodes had been placed apart, or they were small spurts. And when Marcus talked to me in my mind… I wouldn’t hear from him again till the next episode.
I turned to face them, hope rising.
“How much does it weaken him?” I asked. “Is it enough to last several days?”
Nakari jumped beside Jahlem.
“You cut him with your whips, Cheyenne,” Nakari said and then faced Jahlem. “He was bleeding heavily. How much time does that give us?”
“He needs to be at full power to control you. I think we’ve got a week.”
“Perfect,” Nakari said. “Tomorrow, we go searching for Callon.”
My eyes grew wide.
“Do you know where he is?”
“No,” she shook her head. “Not exactly, but I’ve got some scouts to check in with. We haven’t been the only ones searching for him, Cheyenne. We’re getting closer.” She squeezed my hand. “Callon can help you, show you how to block Marcus for good.”
Nakari jumped back to the kitchen while Darrien and Jahlem added more wood to the stove. Would Callon even want to see me? Would he help? Or would he shun me again?
I didn’t know if my heart could take another rejection from him, even if it had been my fault in the first place.
Chapter 20
I stared at myself in the bathroom mirror, my eyes red and bloodshot from the tears that wouldn’t stop. Blood, Skylar’s blood, was on my sweater, neck, and cheek. I could still see the meadow and Marcus’s cold stare. My hands rising, the golden whips lashing out, and Skylar’s limp, bloodied body lying in the snow.
Memories came in waves, flooding my senses, and I pressed my eyes closed. Skylar had willingly given his time, teaching me how to move about during battle like a dancer. When I told him I didn’t know how to dance for my wedding, he’d been the one to ensure I was graceful. His quietness was enduring. He’d ripped me away from my wedding at the lake. He’d brought me to safety, risked his life as he dragged me through the icy waters.
And he’d been one of the first who admitted he didn’t understand what I’d done, but would support me regardless. But he had no idea it’d cost him his life in the end.
His death was on my shoulders, regardless of the fact that Marcus had used me. My breath caught and tears streamed down my cheeks. I walked away from the mirror and tossed the bloody sweater to the bathroom floor. I stepped under the water and tried to wash away the blood and awful memories of his death. Goosebumps ran over me, and it wasn’t just from the cool water.
Nakari had tried to convince me to shower first, but I’d waited till they were done. Now I knew why she’d prodded. She knew I’d see the dried blood and the memories would wash over me.
What would Callon see in me now? Would he look at me and find all the failures and faults? Would he turn his back on me again? Would he shove me away?
A knock at the door broke my thoughts.
“Cheyenne,” Nakari called, “you okay?”
I shut the now freezing water off, and reached for a towel. A chill ran over me, but it was quickly replaced by the warmth that ran through me.
“I’m fine,” I called out. “Give me a minute.”
She gave no reply, but I caught her soft footsteps walking away.
I dried myself off and glanced to the floor at the clothes Nakari had bought for me. A pair of jeans, a thermal tee, a tank top, and socks along with underwear were neatly folded in a
pile. I quickly dressed, rolling my hair in the towel to remove the excess water.
I opened the door to find her sitting at the small table. She slid a brush across the table.
“You might need this,” she said.
“Thanks,” I replied.
I didn’t bother returning to the bathroom mirror to brush my hair. I didn’t need to look at myself any longer to remember what I’d done. The memory of Skylar’s body in the snow was more than enough.
I moved towards the front window, the day’s light fading and turning the sky a darker grey. The snow had continued to fall, which was in our favor; our tracks would be harder to follow. However, if it got any deeper, it would make it harder for us to travel. We needed to leave in the morning.
“Nakari,” Jahlem said. “You and Cheyenne take the bedrooms. Darrien and I will sleep out here.”
Neither Nakari or I argued, and each of us took a room to rest. I lay on my side, staring at the wood paneled wall. I hoped they were right that I had days before Marcus would recover enough to try and control my powers again. I hoped it was enough time to find Callon…if he would even see me.
I wrapped the blanket tighter around myself. I didn’t need it for the warmth; I needed it to feel like I could hold myself together for a few more days. I closed my eyes and tried to think of happier times. Days ahead when I’d get to see Daniel’s smiling face and beg for his forgiveness…
A knock on my door woke me from my sleep. I blinked, but the room was still dark. It had to be the early morning hours.
“Cheyenne,” Nakari said, “we need to get moving.”
“Coming,” I croaked, my throat dry.
I crawled out of bed and slipped my boots on. Grabbing the gray wool jacket Nakari had picked up for me, I headed for the door. Darrien, Jahlem, and Nakari were waiting near the dimly lit entry. I glanced at the clock, which read three a.m.
I followed them out, the blowing snow whipping up around us. Darrien carried a bag containing our old clothes and dinner items. He wasn’t about to leave anything behind for a Tresez to catch a whiff of, although all they had to do was enter the cabin and they’d know we had been there.
Awakening: A Timeless Series Novel, Book Four Page 26
