“What, Paxton?” I quietly asked.
Still nothing. He stared at me with unsure eyes, and removed his shirt, and then jeans. No words. He stroked himself a couple times, and kicked my knee out with his, sliding into me half-mast. His hands moved mine above where he locked them with one hand. Our lips met and we kissed the longest, sweetest, kiss I’d ever received from him. Best kiss award for my new Lifetime movie. I felt him grow inside me with every thrust, changing the tempo between my legs. Paxton shoving into me like he did changed the game. I tried to be in the moment with him. Something in his eyes, the way he looked at me, and the way he made love to me, told me that’s where I needed to be.
One last attempt to pull words from him failed. “Paxton, tell me.”
No words, he jolted his waist even harder. That one caused me to close my eyes, and forced a whimper. Paxton was very attentive to me, kissing me passionately, and exploring my body with his fingers. My ass, my nipples, and my back.
I did get a little smile when I threatened not to come if he didn’t talk to me. He let go of my hands and held my ass with both his. That was plenty enough leverage to send me toppling over. Three strokes. That’s how pathetic I was. I swear it started in my toes, euphoric sensations, moving slowly up my legs. My body twisted into some weird C shape, my back arching while my red nails slid down his chest. Holy earth shattering orgasm.
It felt like the longest orgasm in the world, at least a minute long from start to finish. I’m not even sure if I breathed or not. Every muscle in my body tensed. Somewhere in between the ride, I caught the look on Paxton’s face. Stress wrinkles around his eyes, a clenched jaw, like he was in pain, and the expression he used when he’d just come inside me. I loved that look. His lips parted and his eyes expressed the euphoric pleasure, surging his body.
I gasped, realizing I did forget to breath. My body fell to the mattress and my eyes closed while my body came down from a glorious high.
“I love you. I love you more than I ever thought possible, but I’m still not sure I would change it.”
“Are you going to tell me? What was it?”
Paxton’s hips began to slowly move again, a snail’s pace this time. “Yes, but not tonight.”
I thought about my idea to sleep on it earlier. That was a horrible idea. I would never make it.
“That’s not fair. We said we would tell each other everything. I think we should tell Nick we’re not doing it like this, that we want to do it together,” I protested, eyes narrowed to show my displeasure.
“No, I think he’s right. I think we should do exactly what he says.”
“You say that like it could make or break us.”
“Maybe it could.”
I tried my damnedest not to feel the new stir between my legs. Talking seemed more important than my impending orgasm. “But what’s the point in going through it all if we’re just going to lie to each other?”
“I’m not going to lie to you.”
“But you’re not going to tell me everything?”
“Yes, I just need to sleep on it. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“What did I say, Paxton?”
He kissed the tip of my nose while his hips moved in tight, holding deep inside me before withdrawing. “We’ll talk about it tomorrow. Shut up. I’m trying to fuck you.”
Who was I to argue with that? Especially when he pushed my legs to my chest, gaining at least another half an inch. As soon as I came for the second time, Paxton dropped my legs and pulled out of me, jerking himself over my sex. I was still riding my own waves so I didn’t really pay attention to the weirdness. Paxton always came inside me. Not that I minded it. I didn’t. Not at all. The first bout of come landed between my legs and the rest my lower stomach. Paxton moved my hand to his poison, and I massaged it through my opened folds, bringing it all home. Wow. That’s all I could think in my head.
“It’s bad, right? Don’t tell me.”
“No, we’re not doing that. We made a pact. I’ll tell you. I just have to figure it out in my mind first.”
“What’s it about? Can you at least tell me that?”
Paxton pulled me to my feet by my wrists, avoiding my soiled hand. “Let’s go soak in the tub.”
“I already did that.”
He didn’t really give me a choice. Not that I expected that out of him. “Do it with me.”
Paxton brushed his teeth and shaved while I ran water, filling it with purple bubbles. “Don’t you get tired of lavender?” He questioned through the mirror.
“No, my mom loved lavender.”
“How do you know that?”
I shrugged both my shoulders. “I don’t know, but I feel like it’s true.”
“I feel like that, too. You’ve always gravitated toward lavender.”
I sank into the tub for the second time, watching Paxton’s naked ass while he shaved. “I don’t understand why I never told you about her, or Izzy. It doesn’t make sense to me.”
“You’re not going to hear that part. I just listened to it.”
My eyes moved from his ass to his in the mirror. “Why didn’t I tell you?”
He splashed his face with water, rinsing white cream down the drain. “I told you not to,” he said from behind a towel.
I tried to contemplate his words, but I still didn’t understand. “What do you mean? Why?”
“Move up,” he ordered.
I slid up and moved between his legs, settling into his chest while his arms enveloped me. His lips touched my eyebrow and I felt warm words on my skin. I sort of loved this, being in the lavender scented bath with Paxton, my body nestled into his.
“It was the day you told me you were pregnant with Ophelia, the day I told you we were getting married.”
I blew out a puff of a sarcastic air. Of course he told me we were getting married. “Go on.”
“I told you we’d talk about it tomorrow.”
“Well, you can at least tell me why you never knew about my family.”
“I just told you. I didn’t want you to. That was the deal, the agreement we made when I decided to let you be my wife. It was in the stipulations.”
“What stipulations?”
“I don’t remember all of them. You wrote them down.”
“Where?”
“I don’t know. You probably threw it away.”
“Okay, whatever. What was that stipulation?”
Paxton twisted my left nipple between his fingers while he talked in a level tone, dry with no emotion. “You couldn’t have any baggage. I told you that I didn’t want meddling family up my ass and in my business. Your exact words to me were ‘I don’t have any family’ and you’d been in foster care since you were eleven. You lied, Gabriella. It’s not my fault that you didn’t speak up and tell me you had a sister. Even if you would have said you haven’t seen her since you were eleven. At least I wouldn’t have been so blindsided by all this.”
That pissed me off a little and I told him so. “You’re blindsided? I don’t even remember this. You can’t give me shit for being blindsided by anything. Try forgetting your entire life and learning it step by step the way I have. I should hate you. I shouldn’t be with you.”
“I’m trying to remember how hard it is for you, but it’s tough for me, too. More so than ever.”
I shook my head and exhaled a heavy breath. “You gotta give me more than that, Pax. What does that mean? More so than ever.”
“I can’t even explain it, Gabriella. It’s so fucked up. I fell in love with your eyes the moment I saw you. The fear in your eyes, the innocence, I don’t even know. You were like a baby fawn, and I craved you. I was fascinated that I could tell you to do anything I wanted, and you did it. After I told you that we were getting married, you told me that you were days away from being eighteen. That intensified my craving for you.”
“That makes you sound like a pedophile.”
“Thinking about it now does, but not then. Not when I was a twen
ty-seven-year-old man with this hot little sex slave right in front of my eyes. Up until the day you crashed that car, I could tell you to come to me with a look. I could send you a text message at three o’clock in the morning and tell you to come and suck my dick, and you’d do it. I could tell you to clean my office naked while I worked, and you’d do it.”
I stopped him with that, lightening the serious tone in his voice. “I’ll clean your office naked now.”
He snickered in my hair. “Okay, I’m holding you to it, but it’s different, Gabriella. You would never say that before. I had the cleanest room in the house. You didn’t protest, you didn’t talk back to me. If I called you into my office and told you how dirty it was, you automatically stood before me and undressed, eyes on the ground. I soaked up the obedience like a sponge. I was so fucking addicted to you.”
“You know, Pax, I’m trying my hardest not to be mad, and I’m so glad that I know I was gang raped and I don’t remember it. That terrified girl you’re talking about had one hell of a life before you. She deserved better than you.”
“She still does. I never knew about the gang rape. The first couple weeks you were there, I thought you were just some slut running from the cops or some shit. I can’t explain it, Gabriella, but it’s like this. I loved who you were then. Like straight up would have kept you that way for the rest of my life and never thought a thing about it. It’s like all that newness with you back then, is new again, only different. I think your pole dance from then and now would both turn me on. Only now you would put on a show, probably give me a lap dance. You would have never done something like that before.”
“You made me pole dance?”
“I made you do everything, and you did it.”
I took a deep breath and relaxed into his chest. “I mean, I get that you didn’t know about the rape, and I guess it’s not your fault I lied about not having a family, but did you like force me to marry you? Did you make me do it?”
“No, not at all. You told me you were pregnant, and I told you that we were getting married. You never protested. Not once.”
“I’ve never seen a wedding picture. We didn’t have a wedding, did we?”
“No, I’d just dropped a shit ton of money on one failed marriage, I wasn’t about to do it again.”
“So Tatiana the cheerleader got the wedding, and nobody Gabriella got the court house. I hate you.”
“I’ll give you a wedding now.”
I stood, letting the suds fall from my body to his, trying not to feel what I felt. “It’s not about the wedding, Paxton. It just hurts a little. That’s all.”
“I’m sorry, baby. I can’t change it.”
“I’m fine, I’m just glad I don’t remember it. I’m hurt from a third party aspect. I’m sure that’s way better.” I stepped out of the tub and wrapped myself in a soft towel. “Is that it?”
“Is what it?”
“Is there more, or was that all that you were supposed to discuss with me?” I wasn’t sure I wanted to learn more after he slept on it. I know I didn’t like the way I felt.
For a brief second I thought I could read a lie in his expression, but then he sounded sincere. I chose to trust him rather than question him. “Oh, no. That’s it.”
“Good, I’m going to bed. Are you coming?”
“I’m going to work for a little bit.”
I almost told him to come to bed, but I stopped myself. Maybe I did want to be alone for a minute, let my emotions unwind without him clouding my mind with my heart. I nodded and left him alone.
I slid on the same t-shirt and opened the door to the terrace, replacing the glass with the screen. The sound of the ocean and the sea breeze relaxed my tension as I sunk into bed, and thought about the details Paxton had left out, probably gruesome details that I was better off not knowing. I heard Paxton open the bathroom door and descend the stairs, neither one of us acknowledging the other.
We woke tangled in each other’s arms, and to my surprise, I roused, confused, yet content.
“I didn’t even hear you come to bed,” I admitted when I look to see Paxton awake, too.
“You were, snoring.”
“I was not. I don’t snore,” I assured him with an elbow.
“We should probably get up. I heard the girls in the kitchen a few minutes ago. They probably ate ice cream for breakfast.”
I stared up to Paxton, bypassing his comment, the night before weighing heavy on my mind.
“What, baby?”
“Did you lie to me? Are you hiding something from me that you don’t want me to find out?”
“I’m hiding so much shit from you, Gabriella. I don’t think details are going to help matters. Let’s focus on getting our nephew. Can we just do that? I told you what you talked about on the video. That was the deal.”
“No, the deal was to talk about how we both felt. You’re supposed to tell me what you learned from your perspective.”
Paxton slid from below me and I watched his naked ass walk to the bathroom. “I don’t have to learn any of this, Gabriella. My memory is fine.”
“Why do I feel like I can’t trust you then?” I questioned through the stream of pee, spilling out into the room. I shook my head and climbed out of bed, mentally becoming annoyed, knowing who had to clean the splatter. Of course I would never say a word about it, but it still pissed me off. Like he was the only one who lived there.
“Because you can’t,” he admitted with a handful of cock and balls, scratching, maybe. Paxton kissed me on the lips, sidestepped me, and swatted my ass as he passed by me. “Want some pancakes?”
I dropped the toilet seat and shook my head. “Maybe, but I’ll do it. Give me a minute.”
“I wasn’t going to do it,” he admitted with an honest smile into the bathroom while tucking his package behind jeans, commando style. That would drive me nuts all day. Especially when he raised his arms above his head and his jeans fell below a sexy as hell hairline.
“Dick.”
“Watch it. I can still beat your ass.”
“Go away. I’m trying to pee.”
“Oh, really.”
“No, don’t even think about it. Go away.”
Paxton laughed and walked away, commando style.
To my surprise, Paxton and the girls were already making pancakes when I joined them.
“Look, Daddy made you a heart, Mommy,” Ophelia said, excited for my unexpected breakfast.
I took the plate from Paxton’s hand, looking at it with a peculiar glance, and then back to his cocky smile. “It looks like a possum.”
The smart grin instantly took a frown-dive, and I laughed. So did the girls. “It does not. It’s a heart.”
Phi hopped down from the chair pushed to the griddle, and took Paxton’s hand. “Because you’re in love with Dad. That’s why he gave you a heart. Right, Dad?”
“He said it wrong, baby. Daddy’s in love with me. I don’t even like him very much,” I teased while spreading butter to my pancake, eyes on my handsome guy. The commando one.
“I got a snake, look,” Rowan said as she pulled herself to her knees, letting her blonde hair fall right into sticky syrup.
“Mi is going to take me and Rowan to see the, um, the. What is it, Row?”
“Ice Princess. She lives in an ice city,” Rowan explained.
I looked to Paxton for the answer without asking a question.
“Don’t look at me. I have no idea what they’re talking about.”
“You was in bed. She called you and we talked to her on your phone. Tomorrow she is, and she has a new stone for us, but it doesn’t have the kind of magic like our other stones, right, Row?”
“Yes, mine's blue, and Phi’s is green.”
Paxton passed the buck over to me once again. “You’re the one that leaves your phone everywhere.”
“That’s because you’re the only one who ever calls me. It’s usually not that important.”
“Mi is important, right?�
� Phi asked.
I frowned at her pancake, sure it wasn’t supposed to be a soft penis. “Mi is important. What is she supposed to be eating?” I asked Paxton totally missing the smirk on his face over his importance over Mi.
“It’s a skyscraper, dirty girl.”
I chuckled and scarfed a few bites of my doughy pancake and left them to call Mi. “I’m going to walk down to the beach.”
“I’m coming,” both girls simultaneously called, sliding from their stools.
“No, you’re both going to eat your breakfast. We gotta paint, remember?”
That got them. They didn’t want to miss that. They already had to wait a whole day.
“Eat your breakfast, I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
I walked out with my thumb on Mi’s number, having all intentions of walking toward the beach until I heard the loud noise. Curiosity getting the better of me, I walked around to the front of the house. A delivery truck driver slid a noisy metal door closed from Lane and Candace’s house. The moving company pulled out, following two other trucks, and I knew that I would never see Lane or Candace again. Chance would grow up and forget she ever knew me or the girls. I watched as Candace backed her car out of the garage and followed the convoy.
“Bye Felicia,” I called with a snarl and bobbing head, dialing Mi. My real friend.
Mi answered with her happy bubbly voice. “Hey, sleepy head. Long night?”
“Sort of.”
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m okay. It wasn’t bad.”
“It wasn’t?”
The surprise in her tone sent instant warning bells through my mind. “No, why would it be?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I didn’t listen to the conversation between Nick and Paxton.”
My toes slid from my flip-flops when I hit the soft sand. “They talked? About what?”
“I don’t know. I just told you, I didn’t listen.”
“But you’re hiding something. I can tell, Mi. You suck at lying.”
“I’m not lying. I swear. Nick just asked me if I have talked to you. He said Paxton had a confession. That’s all I know. He didn’t tell me what it was.”
Slut Page 22
