by Lea Coll
Loved playing football with him, loved working with him, loved everything about him. His protectiveness, how private he was. I had to tell him tonight.
Cade yelled hike. We were jockeying for position again. This time, Cade handed it off to Hadley who ran the few feet past the trees we’d set on the goal line. She spiked the ball before doing a little dance.
“What is that?” I laughed.
She looked at me like it was obvious. “My touchdown dance.”
Then Cade lifted her high in the air as she looked down at him, pure happiness radiating from both of them.
Today was the first time we’d hung out all together when it wasn’t just a meal or something related to our charities. It was nice doing something fun.
When Cade let her slide to the ground, I high-fived her.
“Should we bump chests?” Hadley asked.
“No. That’s kind of lame. Something those professional players do. We’re so above that.”
“Yeah, you’re right. Totally lame.” Hadley nodded in agreement.
Reid growled, lifting me from behind, flipping me so I fell facedown over his shoulder. “Lame, huh?”
“So lame. And those touchdown dances lack imagination.”
“Too bad we’ll never see yours since you’ll never score.”
I patted his butt. “Oh, I’ll score all right.
He chuckled, causing me to bounce on his shoulder. He eased me down to the ground, his eyes happy. “No more trash talk.”
I shrugged. “I can’t help it.”
His lips twitched until he finally let go, until he smiled wide. “I can see that.”
I was vaguely aware that the others were at the picnic table we’d claimed as our own taking a water break.
I sobered, the feelings I had for him wrapping around me, threatening to burst out. “Thank you for coming.”
“Thank you for inviting me. This is fun.”
“It is.” I couldn’t put it into words what it meant to spend today with my friends and him. It was unprecedented, groundbreaking, yet beautiful at the same time. I wanted to tell him I loved him, but I was conscious the others might be watching. I wanted that moment for ourselves. Instead, I touched his neck, bringing his mouth closer to mine.
I closed my eyes, kissing him lightly, sweetly, pouring all of my feelings, my happiness into that kiss.
“Hey, no fraternizing with the enemy,” Hadley said.
“Our turn with the ball. Are you ready for this?” Reid asked.
“So ready.” The rest of the afternoon was filled with trash talking, touchdown dances, surrounded by my friends and the man I loved. Nothing could be better than this. I didn’t think about anything other than being in the moment. Reid seemed to relax too, saying words with r’s. I hoped it meant he felt comfortable with my friends. It was perfect. He was perfect.
We parted ways before dinnertime, everyone headed back to their respective homes to eat. I loved that no one had mentioned Reid’s job or asked him about the upcoming game. On another day, I might have suggested we all hang out, but I wanted Reid to myself.
On the drive back, he suggested we order pizza. I ordered delivery on my phone. I didn’t want to waste time going out to eat or cooking dinner when I wanted to take him to my bedroom, and show him what I felt.
Chapter Twenty-Six
REID
“What time will the pizza get here?” I asked when Dylan opened her door.
She checked her phone as I closed the door behind us. “Thirty minutes.”
“Good. I’m starving.” I moved to the kitchen, grabbing a bottled water from the fridge. Holding it up to her first, I asked, “Did you want one?”
She shook her head no. I kept my gaze on her as I twisted off the cap, taking a long pull. The cold water felt great going down.
It had been a long time since I’d played football for fun. I couldn’t even remember the last time. College maybe? Some kids on the quad throwing the ball, getting some girls to play with us so we could cop a feel, flirt a little.
She wrapped her arms around my waist, resting her head on my chest. I put the bottle on the counter, an arm around her, pulling her closer into my side, kissing the top of her head.
This woman was mine. All I had to do was be honest with her, give her whatever she wanted from me emotionally. For the first time in forever, I wanted it, I wanted her with every beat of my heart. “Are you sure you want to be this close? I probably stink.”
She looked up at me, her eyes dark with desire. “We can shower together.”
“Yes. After the pizza.”
She nodded. “Can we talk about what you said before the game?”
My chest tightened. The whole afternoon was good, letting go with an ease I almost never allowed myself. But we couldn’t go on like that forever. She needed to know me. “Let’s go sit on the couch.”
I led her to the couch in her family room, with a view of a small yard. Her fingers intertwined with mine, she sat next to me. I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t push the words out. I didn’t even know where to start.
“You said someone said something about your speech? Who was it?” Dylan was perched on the edge of the seat, her muscles tensed, as if she’d spring up at the mention of a name to confront whoever it was. I liked it too much. When had I ever had someone in my corner?
My mouth felt dry despite the water I drank, my lips parched, my mind whirling with thoughts of revealing something to her I’d never spoken aloud. What pushed me to finally say the words was that I trusted her. “My father.”
Her eyes widened, she tightened her grip on my hand, but she didn’t say anything.
“My father said I must be stupid to talk like I did.”
She sucked in a breath, placing her free hand on her stomach as if my revelation physically hurt. She winced. “I’m so sorry, Reid.”
I’d braced myself for the shame that usually accompanied his words. Instead I felt relieved to share it with Dylan. “It was a long time ago. He’s not in my life anymore.”
Her gaze lifted to mine, her eyes filled with a mix of pain, sympathy, and understanding. “It makes sense why you never came forward. Why you feel the way you do.”
“Yeah?”
“You were embarrassed, but there’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
“He’s not the only one who thinks that way. Some of the women I dated said I was a dumb jock for talking the way I do. It’s why I don’t date often. I keep to myself.”
“Sure, there’s a lot of mean people. That doesn’t mean the majority of people would be that way.”
I wanted to ask her how she could be so confident yet I couldn’t. My brain felt a bit like a cement mixer, rotating my thoughts slowly, trying to come out with a different reaction to her words but I couldn’t. The old thoughts in my head solidified, hardened into cement. If my father thought I was stupid, so would everyone else.
“My dad was an asshole. He said I was stupid. That there was something wrong with me.”
She shook her head, disbelief in her eyes. “There isn’t anything wrong with you. You’re not stupid. I can’t imagine saying that to a child.”
I looked over her head, not seeing her, but remembering what it was like to be six years old, having my father call me stupid. The cold shame, the realization that what I’d suspected all along was true, there was something wrong with me. I’d never be like the other kids no matter how hard I tried.
She moved closer, touching my shoulder, kissing my cheek. It was as if she couldn’t get close enough. I wanted to push her away then pull her to me in the same motion. I was torn.
Finally, she straddled my lap, taking my face in her hands. “I love you, Reid Everson. I love all of you, your thoughtfulness, your sensitivity, everything that makes you unique.”
I shook my head. There was no way she loved me after what I’d just revealed.
She held my face tight. “I love you. You can’t tell me how to feel or who to love, because I love
you.”
She emphasized each word, stronger, more forceful than the last.
She kissed me. It was like a dam bursting inside my chest. Emotions were fireworks scattering through my body, singeing everything in their path. She moved closer, tightening her thighs against mine. Anticipation built, my cock hard, I needed to be inside her, closer to her.
I stood as she wrapped her legs around me, never breaking our kiss. I carried her to her bedroom, laying her down, following her so I covered her, fully clothed. Tenderness for this woman threatened to escape my lips in words if I didn’t touch her, kiss her, slide inside. I needed to be closer but I wasn’t ready to bare my soul to her. Not today. I’d never taken that step with anyone.
She tore her lips from mine. “What about the pizza?”
It took me a second to figure out what she was talking about. I felt sluggish, slow, drunk on her. “You paid for it, right?”
She nodded.
“Then forget about it. It’ll still be there when we’re done.”
It was going to be very, very cold, because I had no intention of letting her go until we’d made love thoroughly, until my soul was so entangled with hers I wouldn’t know where she ended and I began. I kissed her neck, her shoulder, lifting up to pull my shirt over my head. She followed suit, unsnapping her bra, her nipples already hard nubs. My cock twitched at the sight.
I groaned as she bit her lip, tugging her panties down her legs then off. She was laying on her bed naked, her eyes full of love and desire for me.
Contentment washed through me because being myself was enough. I didn’t need to put on a front, watch my words, or pretend to be someone I wasn’t.
“Reid.” My name on her lips was an invitation.
I stood, shrugging off my workout pants, grabbing a condom from my wallet.
She moved to kneel on the end of the bed in front of me, her hand covered my fingers.
“Do we need that? I’m clean.” She looked up at me under long lashes, her eyes dark with desire.
“I am too.” I didn’t let go of the wrapper, wondering if I could trust this woman with my body, my heart, my love.
I’d never foregone a condom with anyone. It represented so much more than the physical barrier.
Her hand moved from the condom to cup my cheek, her nipples brushing my chest. “Do you trust me? Not to hurt you. Not to betray you.”
I nodded. It wasn’t even a question. I trusted her. I dropped the condom, buried my hands in her hair, kissing her like my life depended on it.
This woman was everything, the one I’d been waiting for, the one I never knew existed. My brain was screaming I love you, but I was too practiced in holding my words inside.
She moved, kissing my chin, my chest, her fingers trailing lower, wrapping around my cock.
She leaned down, licking the head of my cock then sucking me down deep. “Fuck. That feels so good.”
I thrust my hips, careful not to choke her, steadying my hand on her shoulder. Her mouth on my cock sucked all rational thought from my head.
I groaned. “I’m supposed to be showing you—”
She popped off my cock, her lips swollen, her eyes wide. “Showing me what?”
Tenderness for this woman washed over me in waves as I pushed her gently until she laid on her back. I moved between her legs, spreading her thighs with my knees, testing her wetness with my hand before plunging inside, her soft warmth feeling so different without the barrier of the condom. She arched up, meeting me. “This. How much I want you. How much I need you.” How much I love you.
“Yes, yes, yes.” Her words were like a chant, her head tipped back, her hands gripped my thighs, her nails digging into the muscle sending tingles down my spine.
I gripped her hips, moving hard. I meant to go slow, making love to her, but whatever burst out of me earlier made me desperate to feel her, to be as close with her as I could be. My heart was pounding, a burning desire inside of me racing toward release.
“Come here.” Dylan’s voice was soft, her eyes pleading.
My heart pinched at the vulnerable expression in her eyes. She’d told me she loved me. I hadn’t said it back. As much as I wanted my actions to make up for it, words mattered. I moved so that I was resting my weight on my forearms. Staring into her eyes, the intimacy was almost too much. I’d stilled my hips, my body rigid from restraining my base desire to move, to chase the release we both craved.
“This is better. I love feeling you bare inside me. I love the way you fill me up. I love you.” She caressed my face.
It was too much yet not enough. Instead of saying the words on the tip of my tongue, I kissed her, telling her with my tongue and my cock. I hope she understood I felt the same way. I just couldn’t express myself, not as easily as she could. Even though there were no r’s in those three words, it was the emotion, the show of trust it represented.
I wanted to be normal. I just wasn’t sure how. I’d been locked up in my head for so long, unused to this level of intimacy with another person. I’d never felt this way about anyone. The orgasm built steadily as I moved slowly, out to the tip, then plunging inside, savoring the way her walls gripped me, swallowing her cries when she went over.
I loved her. I just hoped actions were enough for now.
I thrust harder until the orgasm crashed over me, chasing my thoughts with it. I buried my head in her neck until I caught my breath. I rolled to the side, bringing her with me. Her head rested on my chest, her leg slung over mine. I felt my cum leaking out of her onto my thigh. I didn’t want to move to clean up.
I kissed her temple as her breath evened out. I was glad she was asleep because I felt torn between holding onto the man I was, the one who kept everything inside, and the one I wanted to be with her, vulnerable.
Telling her about my speech impediment was a huge step, but she deserved more. She deserved all of me, every worry buried deep inside. Every feeling I was too scared to reveal.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
DYLAN
The shower running woke me early the next morning, the sheets next to me still warm. My stomach rumbled, reminding me we never ate last night. The pizza was probably still on the porch.
My thighs were sticky from last night. I must have fallen asleep before cleaning up. Last night was amazing. He was tender, loving. I’d told him I loved him, not expecting him to say it back. It still hurt that he didn’t.
My heart throbbed with the need to be loved by him. The realization that he might not feel the same sliced through me, opening a raw aching need I never knew I had. The need to be loved, to be taken care of. I was always the one taking care of others, no one had ever taken care of me. Was he capable of the emotion or was I asking too much?
I needed to lower my expectations, taking whatever this was between us one day at a time.
He seemed to feel the same way but was fighting the words. I knew he had difficulty trusting others. I’d hoped after everything we’d shared, he’d let go. I couldn’t ignore the nagging thought that he didn’t know me as well as I knew him.
I slid out of bed, testing the doorknob to the bathroom, letting out a breath when it turned easily. I hesitated to push it open. How would he react this morning in the light of day? Did he want me in the shower with him? Did it denote a level of intimacy we didn’t have? Or was I overreacting?
If he cringed away from me, I’d have my answer. I pushed the door open, the steam of the shower hitting my face. I quickly closed the door so the cool air couldn’t penetrate the cocoon of warmth he’d created.
I saw his ass through the open wall of my shower. I moved closer, ignoring the mirror, knowing my hair was probably a tangled mess. Stepping behind him, I kissed one shoulder blade, lingering when he startled from my touch, then the other, placing kisses down his spine. My hands went around him to steady myself, my nipples aching as they rubbed against his slick back, his abs flexing under my fingers, the water sluicing over them.
I pressed my n
ipples against his back, my hand gripping his semi-hard cock. I pumped once, twice, before he turned in my arms.
“Good morning.” My words were shy, uncertain as I looked up at him through my eyelashes.
He moved me so that I was under the water, he stood slightly outside it. “Good morning.”
He kissed me, his hands in my hair like last night except this time, his lips and tongue moved leisurely as if he had all the time in the world to savor me, to love me.
He stopped kissing me, leaning past me for my bottle of shampoo. I watched with rapt attention as he squeezed out a dollop, turning me so that my back was to his front. He lathered the shampoo in my hair, I leaned my weight on him, dropping my head back slightly, closing my eyes at the sensation of his hands in my hair kneading, caressing, massaging my scalp.
“That feels so good.” The sensation sent tingles down my spine. No man had ever taken the time to wash my hair or massage my scalp.
“Better than my tongue on your pussy?”
I nearly groaned at the visual of him dropping to his knees, licking me in the shower while I balanced myself. “I wouldn’t say that.”
My voice sounded raspy, needy as if we hadn’t satisfied ourselves last night.
“I want you, Dylan. I want to take care of you.” He turned me, continuing to caress my strands as the water washed the soap out of my hair.
My eyes stung from unshed tears. I wanted that too, more than anything. Before I could answer, he’d lathered his hands with body wash, caressing my body, starting at my shoulders, arms, my stomach before turning his ministrations to my breasts, saving the nipples for last. He rubbed my nipples with his thumbs until they were hard nubs begging for more. The sensation an electric shot to my throbbing core.
“Reid.” There was a deep ache between my legs only he could satisfy.
