by Barbara Lohr
Bella tipped her head up to her dad. “Daddy, did you eat from this dish when you were a little boy? Just like me?”
Cameron nodded. “Sure did. And I had to eat all my food. Even the lima beans.”
He must have seen Harper’s expression because he stopped right there. Bella was making so much progress. No need to mention the lima beans or okra story.
A clown was cooking hamburgers and hot dogs on the grill. The scent curled invitingly through the air, and more than one passerby peered in through the gate.
“Bella, why don’t you show your grandmother and aunt where the food is, darlin’?” Cameron nodded toward the buffet table.
“We’d sure like that.” Lily held out one hand. Bella hesitated just a second. Then she linked her hand with Lily’s and the three of them trooped off across the grass.
“Your girls,” Harper murmured. “Quite a trio. Want me to take that dish?”
“Before I break it?” he teased, handing over the childhood treasure. “I can’t believe my mother kept this.”
“Women can be sentimental.” She clutched the heavy crockery to her chest, imagining the towheaded toddler eating from this bowl.
“Yeah, I guess. And I was the youngest, after all. Last child and biggest disappointment.”
“How can you say that?” The bowl clanged against the wrought-iron bench when she set it down too fast. Darn thing was heavy. So were his words. “Look at everything you’ve accomplished.”
Disbelief flared in his eyes. “You mean the house and everything that goes with it? Not the kind of thing my people value, Harper. We come from a farm, where the land is the thing that counts. That’s how they look at it. Anyway, that doesn’t matter. They’re not the ones I want to impress.”
Harper studied her green slides, flexing her pink-tipped toes and not trusting herself to look at him.
He sank onto the bench with a sigh. “I am plumb tuckered out.”
She laughed, nudging the bowl over and settling next to him. “Said like a boy from Hazel Hurst.”
“You got it.” Linking his hands behind his head, Cameron smiled. When had she seen him this content? She wanted to lay her head on his broad chest, listen to the beat of his heart and never leave.
That thought brought her bolt upright.
“What? Did you get stung by one of those bees? I asked Jack to spray.” His quick sweep of her body brought heat to her cheeks.
“Oh, no. I’m fine.” She sat back, the wrought iron warm against her back.
One arm behind her, Cameron studied her through the dappled sunlight filtering through the tree overhead. The air felt heavy with unsaid words.
Uneasy, she pulled her attention back to the party. “This sure was the best prize at the Telfair Ball that evening.”
“You were the prize that night. Reminded me I’m not that old.”
“You’re not?”
His burst of laughter made her cheeks flame. “I mean, I’m not sure. Just thought you were older.”
“Really? You think of me that way? Great.” Disappointment darkened his eyes. Reaching over, he tucked a wisp of hair behind her ear. The finger swiping from one hoop earring to her chin didn’t seem like an accident. “I’ll be thirty next year. Too old?”
Suddenly, things had become way too personal.
“Maybe we should get something to eat,” she whispered.
He heaved a tight sigh. “If you say so.”
Grabbing the dish, Harper leapt to her feet. “I’ll just take this inside so it doesn’t break.” Her heart hammered against her ribs as she worked her way through the kids to the steps. Five minutes with Cameron and she just about forgot this was a children’s birthday party.
She dashed inside the house so fast she nearly tripped. Stowed the dish on the counter and grabbed her breath before returning to the party. When it was time for the cake, Cameron lit the five blue candles. Bella was beside herself when he set it in front of her while everyone sang. Pipsqueak went crazy. All three grandparents sang, and it hit Harper that they’d never shared a birthday with their granddaughter. Chaos and confusion reigned but so did a lot of love. This was how birthdays always were at her house. Cameron glanced around with a look of satisfaction, and she was so happy for him. The opening of the gifts passed in a flurry of paper and laughter. Candace listed each gift on her notepad so that thank you notes could be sent.
After all the birthday guests had drifted through the back gate, Candace and her crew bundled up every burned candle and crumpled napkin and disappeared through the gate. The Goodwins hovered, clearly not eager to leave. With his mother and sister in tow, Cameron approached his in-laws. Not wanting any fireworks, Harper was close on his tail.
“Thank y’all for coming,” he said. “Bella really enjoyed it.”
“We enjoyed it too,” Lily said. “Right, Mom?”
“Sure did.” Esther compressed her lips as if she had more to say, but Lily had her outspoken mother in hand.
“We could order pizza, if you’d like to stay,” Cameron offered.
“Oh, good heavens, no,” Linda Sue Goodwin piped up. “Don’t want to overstay our welcome.”
But Cameron didn’t leave it there. “You’re always welcome. I’m sure Bella would like to see more of you. Me too.”
His efforts to heal their rift touched Harper’s heart.
“Well, now. That would be real nice,” Mr. Goodwin said. “Perhaps another time.”
“Of course. Right.” Cameron left the door open. Bella had come barreling from the corner of the yard, Pipsqueak hard on her heels. “Bye, Grandma. Grandpa.” The words came easier now.
“We have to get on the road, too.” Lily looked to her mother for agreement and took car keys from her purse.
“We thank you, son.” Esther’s words came slowly, almost begrudgingly, but Cameron’s face cleared as if he recognized how difficult this was for his mother.
“I hope you’ll come again, Mama.”
Hands shaking and head down, Cameron’s mother fussed with the buttons on her blouse. She didn’t reveal her emotions easily.
For a while, they played with Bella’s gifts, but the birthday girl was exhausted. Harper had no trouble putting her to bed. Connie drifted home and Cameron disappeared upstairs. She heard his door close. But Harper wasn’t ready to closet herself in her room just yet. Slipping into her sleep pants and top, she took a cup of decaf onto the back porch and sank onto the rattan loveseat. In her mind, the darkened garden still rang with Bella’s birthday joy. Harper stowed happy memories from a day she’d always remember.
Her peace was short-lived. She felt Cameron in the doorway before she saw him.
“Mind if I join you?”
“Of course not.”
He sat down with a sigh that reverberated in her chest, extending one arm behind her. “Great party, right?”
“The best. Bella loved it.”
“So did I. This couldn’t have happened except for you.”
“Thank you.”
Moonlight etched the planes of his face. Reaching over, he traced her cheek with a soft caress and she shivered. In the soft cotton, her breasts came to life. One touch. That’s all it took. He was so very close. She felt so vulnerable. His tentative smile grew and she slid into his arms with amazing familiarity.
“Harper,” he breathed kissing her closed eyelids. “I want you.”
“I know.” She burrowed into him, like she was Pipsqueak. His heart thudded against her cheek. A light beard rasped her forehead. She didn’t care. “Oh Cameron.” Her arms tightened around his neck with no remorse.
She wanted him. Now.
No turning back.
The kisses began where they’d left off at Winston House, lips open and tongues probing. He felt so good and tasted wonderful. Angling, Harper pushed into him, wanting to feel every angle. When he ran one hand up her body, she fell back and granted him access. No games. Not tonight. Not anymore.
She shivered when he nu
dged up her loose top, slowly circled one nipple with his tongue and then nipped with his teeth. Was that his groan or hers? She cupped his crazy curls, coaxing him for more. A damp rush told her she’d never felt this turned on. But this was more than sex, more than arousal.
At least, for her.
“Like the outfit,” he murmured.
“My PJs.” She gasped when he teased the skin under each breast with his tongue.
“Up late, are we?” One hand gentle behind her head, Cameron pulled her closer, dipping one hand under her waistband. His fingers sank into her wet warmth, triggering a tightness. “Maybe you should be in bed.”
She tensed and opened, every nerve ending bucking to life. “Good idea.”
Cameron took her chin in one hand. His eyes flipped from pilot light to burner blue. “Really?”
With a helpless quiver, she let herself fall limp into the hammock of his desire. Words wouldn’t come but a nod did. Sliding her from his lap, Cameron took her hand. They soft-footed it through the house. Every time her mind raised a question, Harper shut it down. She would not overthink this.
She wanted to feel tonight, not think.
Upstairs, all was quiet. In seconds they were in his room and Cameron eased the door shut. Even Pipsqueak must be exhausted from the day.
“Lights?” he asked.
“No. Please. Just you.”
With a smoky glance that made her toes curl, he flipped on the overhead fan and pulled her down onto the bed. “Now where were we?”
“You’re the man with the blueprints, Mr. Bennett.” She edged over on top of him, settling her knees on either side of his hips. His gaze holding hers, he stroked her calves. This wasn’t the time to go slow. She might change her mind. With an impatient tug, Harper ripped off her top, dropping it to the floor. Smiling, she ran her hands up his shirt. “Too many clothes.”
“My word, let’s take our time.”
“Let’s not.” Her fingers plucked at the damn shirt.
“All right then.” A couple more clinging kisses and he slid her onto her side. His shirt and slacks disappeared. She felt so restless and way overdue. Like she’d been moving toward this moment since she first saw Cameron at the foot of the stairs that night. Felt like she was coming full circle and she inched his shorts off with great appreciation.
“Pleased, Ms. Kirkpatrick?”
“Test ride time, Mr. Bennett.”
He cocked a brow. “Right now?”
“Right now.” Call her a trollop, but she could not wait.
He opened the side drawer. She heard the tight snap. Harper welcomed his weight, loved the muscled thigh easing her legs open. With one easy slide, he filled her. Then he paused. In the darkness, his eyes glittered. “Harper?”
“Oh, Cameron. Please.”
No words. They might not be the right ones.
She was good at that.
Instead, she gave a twitch of her hips.
Wonderful man that he was, Cameron began a rhythm slow and steady, a pace she could count on. So she climbed, enjoying the buildup. Loving his response, every grunt, every surge. She caressed, she coaxed, brought her nails down his back until she cupped him. He seemed to wait until he felt her tighten and shatter at that exquisite peak.
Oh, my. A southern gentleman in every way.
Then he flexed, grabbed her hips. Harper swallowed his groan with her own.
“Mustn’t wake the children,” she whispered seconds later, feeling the knot unwind but not the desire.
“Always so… so considerate,” he panted, kissing her damp forehead. His body eased away but not his eyes, or his hands. “So bossy. And so sweet.”
Words of love pulsed in her mind and pushed against her lips. But she didn’t say them. Just shut her mind down.
Cameron filled the night with his lovemaking. Considering his profession, his creativity wasn’t a total surprise. They tumbled from the bed to the chair. Stretched out on the floor and arched over the drafting board. His hands were, oh, so talented. Moonlight patterned his taut muscles through the mullioned windows.
Finally, when her thighs ached and her muscles were spent, he spooned his body around hers in bed and yanked the sheet up. Overhead, the palm fan moved in lazy circles. She’d never felt more treasured, never felt such comfort.
But he hadn’t said anything. Not really.
Was she kidding herself? Again.
Would this be enough?
Before dawn, she slipped upstairs. Reality waited in her room. Harper ran one hand over her sore throat, where “I love you” was lodged tight.
Chapter 25
Lots of giggling going on upstairs. Cameron smiled just to hear Bella laugh with Pipsqueak yapping in the background. Harper’s rich chuckles bubbled down the stairway.
But her silence had slammed him that morning in the kitchen. Harper wouldn’t look at him, much less speak to him. Hope shrank to the size of a damn coffee bean. He decided to work but he could hardly stand to look at the drafting board and left for his office. Finally he’d drifted home way past their dinner hour. He wasn’t hungry. After splashing some Maker’s Mark over ice, Cameron carried his glass into the library.
Leaving his drink on the side table, Cameron walked over to the shelf that held the books he never had time to read. Bella’s baby picture drew him, and he picked it up. She’d been such a tiny thing. They had all been so happy then.
But what did they really know at that age? He was in college and Tammy was still a child, spoiled by her parents. He didn’t want Bella to ever grow up with that kind of entitlement.
Look how they’d ended up.
When she found Cameron studying his wife’s picture, Harper knew she was doing the right thing. Maybe everybody had a picture of a past love tucked in a drawer or on a shelf, but that didn’t bode well for a relationship. Staying here promised only heartbreak. Especially after last night. She shouldn’t settle, wouldn’t settle. Seeing Cameron poring over family pictures snapped her back to reality. But she wanted to leave the house and precious Bella on a good note.
She cleared her throat. “Cameron, could we talk?”
He jerked around, eyes guarded.
Harper’s knees weakened, so she eased into a chair. Early evening shadows crept into the room. Eyes wary, Cameron picked up his drink and took a sip with quiet deliberation.
Here they were. Again. She’d changed so much since that interview.
“I’m giving my notice. I think I should do that, don’t you?”
Another long sip. His eyes burned steely blue in a pale face she longed to cup in her palm. But he said nothing.
Her hair had fallen from the ponytail, and now she pushed it back. His eyes followed every move. “I just think I should.” Because I love you so darn much.
“Don’t suppose I could change your mind.” His lips barely moved.
“No. No, I don’t think so.”
“Is this because of last night?”
“In a way.” Thinking back brought a wave of searing heat. She was glad she was sitting down.
“What if I told you it would never happen again?”
“That isn’t possible.” Her heart clutched at the satisfaction that swept his features and was gone. Her love for him threatened to swamp her.
But his love was what she wanted. The rest would be meaningless without that.
Wouldn’t it? Oh, how she was tempted. For a second she hesitated before slipping back into the rut of her decision.
He loosened a ragged sigh. “Can you wait until I find your replacement? That seems only fair,” he threw in, almost as an afterthought.
“Yes, of course. How long might that take?”
His laugh held a bitter edge. “Usually not long. The salary is too good, and I suppose I’ll have to raise it. Again.”
She balled her hands against her stomach, glad she hadn’t eaten much that day. “If you’re trying to make me feel bad, you’re succeeding.”
His handsome features se
ttled into that inscrutable expression he wore so well. “Sorry, Harper. I have no reason to make this painful for you. After all, you’ve done a great job with Bella. I’m grateful.”
“Toughest challenge I ever faced.” She couldn’t help feeling proud. “You were wonderful with Bella and her eating problem. I don’t think she would have reacted the same way with me.”
“It’s just a beginning. There’s so much more to do.” The bewildered shake of his head almost made her relent. She almost told him that of course she’d stay.
But she just couldn’t. She settled before and knew she wanted more. Pushing up from the chair, she couldn’t help looking at the family photos on the bookshelf. The three of them had been such a perfect family. “You must really miss her.”
Following her eyes, Cameron drew closer and picked up the photo of his beautiful wife cuddling their newborn baby girl. The lump in Harper’s throat felt bigger than Bella’s entire birthday cake.
“Miss her?” His voice held an empty echo. “She was leaving me for someone else that night. We’d had a rough week with Bella. When the baby finally quieted down, I left Tammy drinking in the kitchen. Figured she’d earned it. But her note made it pretty clear. Someone was waiting. Drunk out of her mind, she ran the stop light at the junction leading to Hilton Head. The truck driver couldn’t brake in time. Plowed right into her.”
Harper’s head hurt from not breathing. “Oh, Cameron. I am so sorry.”
He set the photo back down. “I’ve never admitted that to anyone, although I think her mother suspected. A guy from my fraternity, no less.”
“How could she desert beautiful little Bella?” And you.
“We were young and Tammy liked the good times. Bella cried a lot and Tammy just couldn’t take it. Her parents never forgave me for what happened.” Clearing his throat, Cameron looked mystified and almost embarrassed. “Now if you’ll excuse me. Long day. Of course I’m happy to provide a reference.”
Harper watched him leave, back ramrod straight. Cameron Bennett was a proud man, and she’d just dealt him a low blow. But this time she would look out for herself. This time she would not create a relationship that didn’t really exist. She followed him upstairs, feeling so darn weary. Connie was just leaving Bella’s room.
