I felt the car pull over and come to an abrupt stop. Sinjin’s door opened and the cold air enveloped me in a welcomed hug. My door flew open and Sinjin fumbled with my seat belt before hauling me out of the car and into his arms.
“Breathe, love. You are having a panic attack.”
A panic attack? Yes, I imagined a panic attack felt just like this, although I’d never had one before.
“Jolie, look at me,” he said, holding me at a distance. “Focus on the black of my eyes.”
His eyes glowed in the moonlight but I couldn’t focus on them, I was so petrified by the fact that I couldn’t breathe. “I … I …”
He shook me. “Focus on the black of my eyes!”
I forced myself to look into his eyes.
“Just breathe. You and I are going to get through this, do you understand?”
I nodded dumbly, wondering if he was referring to this particular situation or the war in general. My breathing became more regular but I wasn’t sure if Sinjin was bewitching me or just using the power of persuasion. Then I remembered he couldn’t bewitch me, so I guess I had my answer.
“Take another breath for me, love,” he whispered. “There’s my good girl.”
Finally calm, I inhaled deeply and collapsed against Sinjin’s chest, wrapping my arms around him. I just needed to be close to him, to be comforted. Sinjin held me while I cried, rubbing my back in large circles, reassuring me.
“What is the matter?” he crooned against my ear.
“I’m so afraid, Sinjin.”
“There is nothing to be afraid of; I will not allow you to come to harm.”
It was the same thing Rand had told me. But what neither seemed to remember was the fact that if Bella won, there wouldn’t be a damned thing anyone could do for me or for themselves. And that’s what scared me the most—the what ifs. I couldn’t face that now though. Instead, I took comfort in Sinjin’s strength, in the feel of his arms around me.
“Thank you,” I whispered, suddenly overcome with the realization that Sinjin had always been there for me. Maybe I’d taken him for granted? I mean, I’d always thought of him as the hot vamp who wanted to get into my pants but figured it ended there. Was there a chance I’d been wrong? Maybe there was more to him than met the eye?
He pushed away from me and wiped my tears with the pad of his finger. “Your breathing has slowed.”
I nodded and couldn’t tear my attention from his incredibly handsome face, from the deep angles of his cheekbones, his Roman nose, and the squareness of his jaw. How his impossibly light blue eyes leant him the look of some mythical creature, someone designed by the Gods themselves.
He chuckled. “Poppet, you almost appear as though you like me.”
His comment surprised me. Did he really think I didn’t like him? That I just put up with him? Hmm, maybe I’d made it seem that way? I gulped hard as a dawning realization hit me—I’d been hiding my feelings for Sinjin, hiding them from him as well as from myself. And now, as he stood before me in the moonlight, I couldn’t keep my feelings at bay.
I looped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me, gazing up at him. Shock usurped his expression, melting the smile right off his face. He swallowed hard and wrapped his arms around my waist, not making any motion to take things further. So he was going to leave it to me, was he?
I didn’t even have to ask myself what my intentions were. There was no regret, no second thoughts as I stood on my tip toes, my eyes never leaving his. I leaned into him and brought my mouth to his lips which were freezing cold but so soft and full. I closed my eyes, relishing the feel of his arms around me. His grip on my waist tightened and he pulled me even closer, the chill of his body radiating through me. His kiss was delicate, almost shy, allowing me to take control. It was a side of Sinjin I’d never imagined seeing—so different to the cocky and confidant vampire I’d grown to … deeply care about.
But that side of Sinjin wasn’t far behind, and when I opened my mouth and slipped my tongue into his, a groan escaped him. He lifted me and carried me to the car, depositing me on the hood as he leaned into me, meeting my tongue thrust for thrust. His hands splayed through my hair, tugging slightly on the nape of my neck. He angled my head back and pulled away from me, gazing down at me with a mysterious smile.
Without a word, he dipped his head and the feel of his lips on my neck caused the breath to catch in my throat. I angled my head back further, offering him free reign. Somehow, I knew he wouldn’t bite me, wouldn’t take it to that level. This was just a warning, a tease of what he was capable of. Fire burned in the pit of my stomach and moved south until I yearned for more. Desire exploded within me, hinting to the fact that I was dangerously on the brink of wanting more and not being able to stop.
“Sinjin,” I said in a breathless voice. “We have to stop.”
“Why?” He didn’t look up from his assault on my neck.
“Because, I won’t be able to stop if we keep going.”
His hands fisted and his breathing was shallow, rushed. He pushed away from me and met my eyes, his glowing white. His fangs crested his lower lip and I gasped, not out of fear but intense passion.
“You have no idea how much I care for you,” he said in a raspy voice. “How I desire you.”
And I knew at that point I had to be honest with him, I had to admit to what was in my mind, pulsing through my veins. I didn’t want him to go into battle thinking he meant nothing to me. “I care for you too, Sinjin, and … I want you too.”
A devil’s smile spread across his full lips. “Then what is stopping us?”
“Rand,” I said in a small voice. As honest as I’d been about my burgeoning feelings for Sinjin, I also had to be honest about my feelings for Rand.
His smile fell and he stepped away, his jaw tight.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered and jumped to the ground, watching him approach the rear of the car. His back was to me but I could see the frustration boiling through his body—it was in the tightness of his shoulders, his fisted hands.
He turned around and refused to look at me, just started for the car door and opening it, deposited himself in the seat and turned the engine on. I opened my door and sat down, not saying anything as I buckled myself in.
There wasn’t anything more to say.
THIRTEEN
An hour and a half later, we arrived in Inverness. I was exhausted, both physically and emotionally. Luckily, I didn’t have another panic attack, although the one I had gave me cause for pause. I’d been completely unable to control myself. I felt like I’d been sinking fast and there was nothing I could do to save myself. If not for Sinjin, I’m not sure what would’ve happened.
And speaking of the vampire, after giving me the silent treatment for about twenty minutes, he’d reverted back to his normal self and acted as if our kiss was a thing of the past, forgotten as quickly as it happened. I, myself, didn’t know what to make of it. I loved Rand, yes, but I couldn’t help the fact that I also cared about Sinjin … a lot. But I resolved to push the confusing thoughts aside, seeing as how I had no answer for them.
“What time is it?” I asked, in search of a clock in the Batmobile but failing to locate one.
Sinjin took a corner a little too fast and the tires squealed in protest. “Five past two.”
I gripped my seat and glanced at him, at his perfect profile and suddenly was consumed with the need to touch him, to kiss him again. God, I hadn’t realized I’d been suppressing my feelings for Sinjin, pushing them out of my conscience. The thought frightened me—what if Sinjin was only interested in sex? Or what if he was just as opportunistic as I’d originally imagined and only wanted me for my otherworldly powers? I gulped as I realized my heart was now on the line.
“How much further is the fairy village?” I demanded, trying to focus on other subjects.
“Just off Culloden road, poppet. We shall be there momentarily.”
It suddenly dawned on me that staying in
a fairy village alongside the battlefield might not be the best of ideas. I mean, if Bella were victorious, would it be to our advantage to be so close? “Isn’t it kind of dumb that we and our loved ones are staying in such close proximity to the battle?”
Sinjin shook his head. “The village is not truly in Culloden, pet. This is merely the easiest access point. The village itself is buried deep in the Cairngorms forest.”
“How far away is that?”
“Perhaps an hour by automobile.”
Hmm, I remembered Odran accessing Mathilda’s village from a remote tree near Pelham Manor. A tree that was miles from the actual fae village. So maybe this little bit of fairy magic extended even farther than I’d assumed?
I nodded as my eyes settled on the navigation screen which informed us to stay on B9006. According to the female voice, we’d arrive at our destination in seven minutes. I thought it strange that there were a multitude of modern houses and subdivisions off Culloden road … odd because such an ancient and respected site should somehow be off limits to such spec developments. Oh, well, I guess people had to live somewhere.
We exited onto a road that didn’t appear to have a name because the navigation announced we were “off road.”
“Are you sure it’s down here?” I asked dubiously.
“Yes, love, quite.”
I shrugged and resolved not to be a backseat driver, or passenger seat driver as the case may be. We turned a corner and on either side of the road were rows of cars parked along the shoulder. So it seemed we’d found our destination and these were the rental cars belonging to our legion. Sinjin pulled the Mercedes onto the lip of the road and turned off the engine. Now it seemed there was no going back, the battle looming ever nearer like a nightmare. How much blood would be shed? How many of our legion would make this their last stand?
The car lights came on as Sinjin opened his door and faced me with a wide grin. Hmm … As if my hopeless situation with Rand weren’t enough, now it seemed I could add Sinjin to that sentiment. How had I managed to be digging two men at the same time?
“We are here, poppet.”
In an instant, he appeared on my side of the car and opened my door, acting like the perfect gentleman. I smiled hesitantly and stood up, inhaling the clean air. Dark, low clouds interrupted the milky glow of the moon as thunder sounded from the heavens. A soft, cool breeze blew through the trees and caressed my face. I watched Sinjin retreat to the trunk, where he pulled out his overnight bag. He rifled in his pocket and produced a skeleton key which was maybe the length of my thumb. It was different to the key Rand, Christa, and I had used to access the fairy village in Glenmore but I imagined it worked in the same way.
“Have you used one of those before?” I asked, watching Sinjin hold it between his thumb and forefinger, looking like he was using a divining rod to locate water.
“No.”
“Finally, there’s something I can do that you can’t.” I reached for it and grabbed it out of his grip with a self-satisfied grin.
“I am certain there are many subjects in which you excel, poppet,” he said, looking like he was about to touch me but instead, dropped his hand. I wanted to grab his hand and hold it, just to feel his skin but instead, returned to the subject of locating the entrance to the fairy village. I laid the key flat on my palm, stretching my arm out in front of me and took a few steps nearer the tree line of the forest.
“It is not doing anything, love,” Sinjin said, suddenly appearing right next to me. The chill of his breath sent shivers over my skin and I was reminded of the last time we were in the forest together. When I’d escaped from Bella’s House of Horrors, Sinjin had tracked me the entire way. At the time, I’d thought he was allied with Bella and Ryder, but even then, I couldn’t deny my attraction to him and the way my heart sped up whenever he came too close. I never knew whether it was fear or attraction. Even now I sensed a tinge of fear regarding the vampire. It must have had to do with the fact that I never truly trusted Sinjin; there was always something that warned me not to get too close to him. And there was always the possibility that he could break me like a twig.
“You are too quiet. What is consuming your thoughts?” he inquired, grabbing my arm and forcing me to face him.
The moon broke through the clouds and painted him in an eerie glow of luminescence. In his black pants and black cashmere sweater, he appeared every inch the sinister vampire. I gulped down a ray of fear that appeared from nowhere.
“Poppet, you look frightened.”
I tried to smile. “It just occurred to me that I put entirely too much trust in you.”
“It is a little late for thoughts such as those, no?”
“Probably.” What was it about Sinjin that was just so … arresting? I couldn’t put my finger on it. Maybe it was the thrill of his unpredictability—like walking a precipice, knowing you could fall off any minute.
He chuckled deeply. “And what do you suppose I plan to do with you? Drink you? Molest you?”
I shuddered involuntarily at the words “molest you” and killed thoughts of Sinjin’s touch. “Mostly drink me.”
He smiled and ran his index finger down my neck. “You do not know me at all well, pet. I would far rather touch you.”
“Well, I guess I’m just glad you’re a good guy and on my side.” It was more a question than comment.
“It is not wise to trust blindly, love.”
Before I had the chance to respond, the key appeared to sense my disquietude and pitched itself forward until it was hovering an inch or so above my hand, pointing to the right.
Sinjin chuckled. “Ah, very good, little poppet.”
I didn’t respond but followed the direction dictated by the key, stomping through the undergrowth and God only knew what on the forest floor. At least it wasn’t raining like it had been in Glenmore. I lost my footing and started to stumble when Sinjin grabbed my waist with both his hands, righting me. He didn’t let go and instead, pulled me into him, breathing down my neck until my entire body shivered with cold. I couldn’t pull away though. I just stood there, like an idiot.
“Watch your step,” he whispered and pushed me forward.
The key leapt from my palm, buried itself into a nearby tree and cranked to the left, making the bark of the tree transparent. I ran my hand through the transparency which felt like lukewarm water and walked through it. As I came out on the other side, I blinked against the glow of numerous torches that lit the otherwise dark dirt pathway leading into the village.
Sinjin stepped through the tree, warily gazing around. I took his hand; why, I wasn’t sure … maybe because he looked like he needed guidance. I led him down the dirt path, following the torchlights as they curved around a corner. The commotion of laughter and singing filled the night air as we approached an open courtyard.
Ten or more female fairy dancers fluttered this way and that, their bodies barely covered by flowing silks in all colors. My eyes moved from the fairy dancers to the audience which was comprised of our entire legion. Hmm, maybe my little meltdown had cost us a lot of time because it appeared we were the last to arrive.
Our soldiers perched on bales of hay set around an amphitheatre in the courtyard where the dancers entertained them. A wooden banquet table lit by candelabras was piled high with a smorgasbord of foods, ales, and meads. And as with the fairy village in Glenmore, at the end of the table, Odran’s gold lionhead throne sat vacant.
“It looks like we are just in time for a festival,” Sinjin said and pulled me close to him. “Remember to play your part, love.”
I nodded; this time I wouldn’t screw it up. I couldn’t alert Rand to my appearance, especially this close to the battle. Speaking of the hardheaded warlock, I searched the now familiar faces, trying to pick his handsome face from among the crowd. Instead, I found Odran, sitting atop a bale of hay between two fairies, but not his usual fairamours who lived with him at Pelham Manor. Tonight he was between a blond and redhead; his hand w
as up the blond’s skirt while he fervently kissed the redhead. Well, maybe that’s an understatement; it looked like he was trying to strangle her with his tongue. Just as I was about to turn away, Odran suddenly pushed the blond down, climbed on top of her and mounted her right there! In front of everyone!
“Oh my God,” I said in disgust.
Sinjin’s eyes fell to the rutting Odran and he faced me with a coy smile. “Quite vile.”
Thank God Rand had warned me about the mead tainted with a love spell Odran had insisted I drink when we’d first met. Otherwise, if I’d slept with the king of the fae, I don’t think I ever would’ve forgiven myself. Odran gave Hugh Hefner a run for his money.
I shook my head and my growling stomach grabbed my attention. How long had it been since I’d eaten? I couldn’t remember. One thing I could say about hanging out with Sinjin, opportunities to eat were never plentiful. I grabbed a wooden plate and piled an ample serving of bread, cheese, grapes, half a pomegranate, and two sausages.
Sinjin observed my plate with a twinkle in his eye. “What army are you planning to feed, love?”
“Ha ha, very funny. I haven’t had a freaking thing to eat all day, so zip it.”
“You will certainly have enough sustenance after that feast to last all week.”
I took a seat on a nearby bale of hay and started in on my dinner, not caring what Sinjin thought. He remained standing.
“What may I bring you to drink, love?”
Hmm, I’d been so hungry, I’d completely forgotten about a beverage. “Anything, I don’t care. Well, no mead,” I added, suddenly remembering I still had to take my daily allotment of Sinjin’s blood. “When will I drink from …”
“Before morning comes.”
Then our sleeping arrangements dawned on me. “Where will I be sleeping?”
“With me.”
My stomach dropped. Behind closed doors with Sinjin … As much as I didn’t trust Sinjin, I also didn’t trust myself. And the more time I spent with him, the harder it was to convince myself I wasn’t that into him.
Toil And Trouble, A Paranormal Romance (Jolie Wilkins) Page 18
