by Koko Brown
“It’s been a great experience and I appreciate you taking me on. It’s nice to get a little extra fun money before school starts again.”
He told me when I met him he’d been a college student, just in town for the summer before going back to school in the fall.
Smiling, I held my bag. “The pleasure is all mine really. You know, since I was off my feet? It’s been nice knowing a good set of hands were there with Aleise.”
“Yeah, she’s great,” he said, smiling. “Very helpful and patient with me. And I’m glad you’re feeling better.”
Pausing, he looked up above the window. I assumed looking for my cast and not seeing it. I held my leg out and he smiled at it.
His grin widened. “Will you be coming by the store soon? Get back into the swing of things? I’ll still be there a few weeks yet before the semester starts.”
“Actually, I’m supposed to right now,” I told him. Checking my phone, I realized how late Aleise actually was. This didn’t surprise me, though. The girl managed to be late everywhere and today would be no exception.
I shrugged. “But it seems my ride is late. Aleise is supposed to pick me up.”
Frowning, Colin narrowed his eyebrows at me.
“She’s supposed to now?” he questioned, checking in his side mirrors. “I was just at the store and she didn’t look like she was going anywhere. I actually stepped out to do the bank deposits.”
Christ.
Sighing, I assumed we must have gotten lost in translation somewhere as far as the time she needed to be here. I pulled up her number but stopped when Colin called my name.
“If you want, you can come back with me,” he said. Shrugging, he messed with his glasses a little. “I have to return the bank bags anyway.”
I didn’t know how long we drove, how… far before I realized we were off course. It had been a while, though. Colin had taken another route.
“Traffic,” he’d said, adjusting his glasses a little. I noticed he did that a lot.
Holding my bag close, I tried to relax and just let him drive. My imagination had been known to get away from me lately and I refused to let another instance occur today. But that was made increasingly hard with the constant turns and continued miles I knew he was putting between me and my store and eventually, I had to say something.
“Colin… are you lost?” I didn’t want to question his intelligence, but…
We were so far off.
I faced him after I hadn’t gotten a response.
He simply had his smile on his face, one that showed of extreme contentedness. Like he was in his own little world.
Like he hadn’t heard me at all.
“Colin…”
His hand only went to the bridge of his nose. He adjusted those glasses again, then chose to play with his visor that was keeping the sun out of his eyes instead of talking to me.
I swallowed.
Moving slow, I slid my hand inside my purse. My phone was in there somewhere and—
His car came screeching to a stop and I was thrown back so hard against the seats a shot of pain struck directly into the back of my skull. Tossed, I only had enough time to notice that we were in an area I didn’t recognize, the location barren aside from the rundown buildings, because in the next moment something sent terror shooting straight into my spine.
Colin, he… he was attempting to get on top of me.
Unbuckled and everything, he slid his body across the seats and when his hand went for his fly, I knew exactly what was about to happen.
The scream he silenced from my throat when he choked me, his hand still down his pants while he attempted to fish his penis out. My hands clawing at his on my neck didn’t phase him at all, if anything it made him smile wider, fuller while he chocked the life from my body.
My airway so tight, I started seeing spots, suddenly happy for them that I wouldn’t be awake. I wouldn’t be coherent while he…
But suddenly life… suddenly it all came back and not only could I breath, but his weight was no longer pinning me down. I was relieved of his body and sputtering, I sat up and fought my way to see through the spots and stars coating my vision. Eventually, they cleared up. Eventually, I could breathe, and once I had, I saw someone I’d never thought I’d see again.
His fists were covered in the blood of my attempted rapist.
THIRTEEN
Sebastian was on top of Colin, his massive body covered head to toe in a gray suit that fitted to his expansive frame. I recalled him wearing similar things when he went out at night sometimes. I didn’t usually see him, but sometimes I’d catch a peek at him through his open car window on his way out.
Because I noticed him, too.
He wailed on Colin, the man’s face turning into something out of a meat grinder, but he didn’t let up.
He kept punching.
He punched until I had no idea if the blood on his fist were Colin’s or his own, a streak catching on Sebastian’s face when he reared back. That dark hair curled over his eyes and the intensity in his gaze told me he wouldn’t be stopping. He was going to kill Colin.
He was going to punch until there was no more life.
“Sebastian…”
My squeak out of my throat that he managed to hear, his head shooting in my direction. He looked at me for all of a second.
Because in the next he was stabbed.
His roar into the air came away with Colin’s blade, Colin rolling out from underneath him.
Struggling, I padded the seat to get out, get to Sebastian, but he was on his feet before I could even touch the pavement. He didn’t even nurse his wound, walking as if he’d never been stabbed and I got out of the car, falling to my knees the moment I had.
I crawled and from that vantage point I watched. I watched Sebastian ripping his gray suit jacket down his arms, Sebastian pulling out a gun from a holster secured to his chest. He used that gun to aim and I didn’t even hear the sound.
It only took one shot, one hit as his target hadn’t gone far. Sebastian simply stepped over to him.
Then blew him away point blank.
FOURTEEN
I knew right away I fainted because when I woke up I was in my bed and not where I’d been. I wanted to move right away, but hesitated when I heard speaking.
The voice gratefully familiar.
“Is she up?” Aleise had spoken the words, behind me as I lay on my shoulder, watching a wall. I almost turned toward her.
Until I heard another voice.
“I think she’s close,” Sebastian said, his voice close. It was as if he sat right next to me, near my bedside.
A sigh left him.
“And if she is, I should probably leave.”
His voice elevated with the words, traveled as if he was going away. I almost turned again.
I fought it.
“Stay,” Aleise said, clearly trying to whisper. “Explain to her.”
“And tell her what?”
Silence in the air after his words, then a softer more feminine breath.
“How about the truth?” Aleise said. Her voice was closer now. Like she took his spot. “The truth like you told me. She’ll understand like I did. You… You saved her life, Sebastian.”
He had saved my life, but while I listened to them go back and forth a moment longer about whether he should stay or not, I wondered how much Sebastian had not only been my savior…
But the reason for which I had to be saved.
FIFTEEN
Eventually, I did turn around, Sebastian long exited out of the room. I faced the world and when I did I found Aleise, my friend immediately giving me words. She spoke about Sebastian, about how he saved me and that I should hear him out. But she hadn’t been there.
She hadn’t seen what he’d done.
“He killed someone, Aleise,” I told her, shaking my head against the pillow. “He did that right in front of me.”
The expression on her face wasn’t one of shock and i
f I hadn’t already known that he’d told her things while I’d been sleeping, I would now. She knew something and he’d let her in, something she wanted me to know now.
She touched my pillow. “From how it sounds, it was necessary.”
Necessary… it felt so not black and white.
Leaning in, Aleise’s micro braids touched the pillow and we both sat in silence for a moment.
“At least just hear him out,” she said, breathing. “He told me things while you were sleeping. He… He cares about you.”
I knew he cared about me. I felt that when we made love no matter how brief the time. I had… started to care about him too, but all of this was so weird.
I found myself caving to the urges of my friend, though. Because eventually, I did get out of bed.
And let her help me downstairs.
He was in my study when I found him, sitting on the arm of the chair I used for reading. Staring out the window, he still had his gun holster on, his shirt open a little.
Aleise left me by the door and my feet creaking the floorboards, Sebastian panned my way, his dark hair moving over his eyes in the way I loved. He stood, coming over a little to me and right away I discovered why he had his shirt open.
A peek of a bandage was on his left side and while he’d been sitting that way toward the window, I’d missed the bloodied side of his white dress shirt caked in what his wound had clearly oozed at one time.
He noticed me staring at it, the gun… everything and stopped.
“You’re awake,” he said and his voice had the nerve to sound relieved.
I shook my head. “I guess I have you to thank for that.”
I wasn’t ignorant. I knew today or whatever day it was since I’d been out might have gone a lot different if not for him. It didn’t stop the fact that this… all this was fucked up.
He put his hands together, nodding a little. “I suppose, but I can’t take credit, not really.”
Standing quiet, the chill chased so bad down my body, I had to cover my arms.
“You said you put people away,” I told him, my jaw moving. “Was he… Colin, one of those bad people?”
I just had a feeling this was the right question and a drop of his head told me I was getting somewhere.
“Yes.”
He started to move closer, but stopped again.
I was glad.
“And his name’s not Colin,” he went on. “He’s a murderer and rapist who I pursued to this city.”
He said the words as if they tasted vile in his mouth, his hand coming up and working his lips.
“And through my pursuit, he found you. He hit you and I lost him in the shuffle.”
He hit me.
I stared down my leg at my ankle no longer casted. My hit and run had been so random.
I guess in the end it hadn’t been.
“And you’d been there that day,” I said, realizing it now. He looked so familiar when I went over to his house initially. “The day of my accident. You were there.”
His head bobbed once, his lips moving a little.
“I stayed with you until help came, yes. After that, I went after him again—”
“Because you’re who exactly?”
He left that out. He was leaving something… out, and that told all over his face.
He swallowed hard.
“A contract killer,” he said and the word sounded in the room in high alarm.
He was a hitman, a hitman that lived across the street.
But not always.
“Did you move in because of him?” I questioned. “That Colin guy is that why you moved here?”
“I did,” he said, his Adam’s apple moving again. “The way this guy works is he obsesses over his victims. He stalks them and… I had to be close.”
Close…
Close.
Because I was his next victim. Because he was stalking me.
“And I’m so sorry, Journee,” Sebastian went on, clearly unaware I was in panic mode by this new information. “I was hired by a man to take this guy out who lost a daughter in a similar way you were attacked. Hit and run and everything. I knew he’d be back for you. I couldn’t let that happen. I—”
“And was fucking me a part of the deal!”
The tears burned down my hot cheeks, tears I didn’t even know I had.
I’d been crying for a while. I must have been because my shirt was wet, my face…
Sebastian came over, his large hands in midair like he wanted to touch me.
But just couldn’t.
“Of course not,” he said, his hands still dangling. “I didn’t mean for that to happen. I… That’s why I left. It shouldn’t have happened and I never meant to hurt you. I swear. I—”
His words paused as I hit him, my palms to his firm chest over and over again.
In my fury, he let me and eventually gave me something I think I needed a little bit more.
His firm hold felt like a welcome home, his chest warm and inviting. Sobbing, I cried into him, let myself meld into him and how he held me close.
“I’m so sorry,” he kept saying, emotion in his voice. Arms so big, he squeezed me tight between his biceps, kissing my hair so softly.
“I didn’t mean to put you in danger, love,” he said. “What happened… It was all my fault. I brought him to you.”
And how much damage he truly did. He had no idea of the consequences. He couldn’t grasp the concept of it. He couldn’t possibly.
My eyes closed, only I truly understood what he’d done.
“You’re a jerk,” I said, my eyes squeezing so tight. The tears seeped down my neck and I let them, shaking my head against his chest. “You’re a jerk and I hate you.”
I did hate him because…
I wanted him.
I wanted him so badly it hurt and it was fucked up. All of this was.
Somewhere along the line he’d gotten in. He worked me open in our short time together and now that I had a piece…
I couldn’t let go so easily.
Especially since he saved me, risked his life. He could have died. He’d been stabbed and not once had he thought about himself. He simply focused on Colin, unable to stop until it was over.
Sebastian’s arms loosened in our hold and I knew, especially with what I said, he was about to let go.
But holding on, I didn’t let him. I couldn’t and eventually, I think he realized that.
He held on too, tighter than he even had the night he made love to me so many times.
“You don’t get to run away,” I whispered and slowly he worked himself out of my hands.
Tipping my chin, he brushed a thumb under my eye, his own warm on me.
“I can’t be in your life the way I’d want,” he said, shaking his head. “It would never be normal. I have a purpose. What I do does good for others. I only take contracts on the most vile, the people who worked their way around the law.”
I supposed he did then, do… good as he said, but was it all worth it… at the expense of himself?
I wouldn’t settle on that, shaking my head.
“You can do whatever you want with your life,” I told him. “And I’m far from normal.”
He only laughed at what I said, dropping his forehead to mine.
“You’re perfect, Journee,” he said, lifting his head. “You may not think so, but normal is only a good thing.”
And he could be normal too… if he’d let himself.
His hold on me, he breathed into my hair, the pair of us quiet for so long.
“We can figure this out,” I said after a while and pulling back, he looked at me. I swallowed. “I want to figure this out.”
Because like I said, I wanted him. This relationship would be… different. It would be intense, but it was something I was willing to figure out with him.
That was if he’d let me.
Slowly, his finger moved down my cheek.
“You wanna try this?” he asked, b
reathing. “Take a chance on me? I don’t scare you? Freak you out?”
Of course, he scared me. He absolutely terrified me, but I had a feeling I scared him just as much as he said before.
This would be different for him too, the two of us, but I think together…
We could work it out.
EPILOGUE
A YEAR LATER
Sebastian and I weren’t like most couples. There were some days he had to leave for the office super early or even miss dinner entirely when he worked late. He’d miss game night with our friends and wasn’t always there at his scheduled times to be someplace with me. But he was always there for me and as far as I was concerned that’s all I needed.
He helped me unbox the final load of books in my new store. I had three now, all around the city. Things took off in the last year and I think that had something to do with a little piece of fiction that I wrote.
My Boyfriend The Hitman essentially blew the fuck up and may or may not have been based on real events. I changed the names and left out a few details here and there and at the end there was a happily ever after; just how it should have been.
My happily ever after drew his arms around me. A man of great stealth, I didn’t even see him coming until he was right up on me. So much I learned about Sebastian in the last year. He actually did have former military training and a history as to why he did things the way he had for so long.
He didn’t talk about the things he’d seen while serving, the things he’d done, but I knew they sat heavy on him. He was enlisted for years and after he got out, he had all these tools he felt was his mission to use. He’d take contracts after vetting the applicants and only took on the mission after making sure the hit was legitimate. At first, he really felt like he was helping people, but eventually, I guess it proved to be too much on his heart.
And now?
Well, he didn’t take on contracts anymore, switching occupations to something in which he could still use his skills while at the same time didn’t feel like he was selling his soul. He was a bounty hunter now, his globetrotting life still exciting. He always came home with a pretty trinket and even took Aleise and me to France this past spring.
