by Jillian Dodd
"They caught the garter and the bouquet. I never thought that really worked. Do you think they will be the next ones to get married?"
"I wouldn't marry them off just yet. They've been dating for all of two weeks now. That'd be crazy."
I cough.
Danny chuckles. "You and Phillip were different."
"I'm just giving you shit. You know, Joey and Chelsea made out a couple years ago at a party and then he never called her."
"Sounds like he's calling her now. He's hot for her."
"Okay, I gotta go," I say, knowing I need to get off the phone before I accidentally blurt out that I'm freaking pregnant. "Talk to you soon. Thanks for the address."
"You know we're coming over for dinner tonight."
"You are?" Shit.
"Yeah, you told us we could use your kitchen, remember? Demolition started this morning, and we'll be over pretty much every day until it's done. Pray it's finished before the baby gets here."
I think about how I was going to surprise Phillip with the shirts tonight.
Naked.
"Um, I'm still not feeling well. I'm not sure Lori should be around me when I'm sick."
"She was already around you when you were sick."
"Fine. I have a little surprise planned for Phillip tonight. A naked kind of surprise."
"You have your period. Couldn't be that good of a surprise." He laughs. "I'm stopping to pick up ribs."
"But, Danny, we're newlyweds. We're supposed to eat naked."
"Hey, I'm cool with naked. Whatever."
"Danny."
"Tell you what. We'll leave right after dinner, so you can have your newlywed fun. I'll even get you some extra barbecue sauce to take to bed."
"Don't mention that in front of Lori," I tease. "You know how she's been craving barbecue."
"She has? Scratch that. I'm keeping the sauce for myself."
At dinner, I can't stop smiling. I'm so afraid one of them is going to notice and ask me why. And I don't think I'd be able to lie about it.
Thankfully, Danny is true to his word and herds Lori out the door after dinner.
I run into the closet, strip down to my underwear, and pull on the football jersey I bought.
Then I grab the present I wrapped for Phillip and set it on the bed.
"Hey, Phillip," I yell over the TV, "will you come in here?"
I position myself on the bed. The jersey is riding up and exposing my long legs. The V-neck is pulled down as far as it can go.
"What are you wearing?" he asks, as he comes through the door.
"A football jersey. The Super Bowl is this weekend, you know." I thrust the present at him. "Here, open this."
He picks the box up and shakes it. But then he tosses it aside and slides his hand under my jersey. "I think I'd like to open this first."
I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him on the cheek. "I'd like that too, but not until you open your present."
His hand sneaks further up. "You don't have a bra on. You gonna wear it like this to the party?"
"I'm going to cancel the party if you don't open your present."
Oh my god.
Please!
Open. The. Present.
I'm going to burst!
He kisses me instead.
The boy has a one-track mind.
I push him away. "Phillip, please! Stop! I need you to open the present! It's important!"
He's a little taken aback. "Uh, okay. Sorry. You're just so damn sexy, I can't keep my hands off you."
I feel bad for yelling at him, but I can't take it any longer.
I grab his hand. "Phillip, before you open it, I just want to tell you that I love you. And that . . ." Tears pool in my eyes and fall onto my cheeks when I blink. "Um, just that I love you."
He tilts his head trying to understand why I'm crying. "I love you too, Princess. What's wrong?"
"I'm just excited for you to see what I got you. It's something pretty special."
I laugh to myself thinking how everyone kept using the word special on the night Phillip surprised me by proposing.
He leans back, grabs the present, sets it on my lap, and removes the bright blue and fuchsia polka dot bow.
"Really colorful," he says as he rips into the yellow wrap and opens the box. "Sweet! You got us matching jerseys. You know, Danny's gonna give us shit though. He sent me some hilarious video showing married couples dressed the same--"
"Our shirts aren't exactly the same," I interrupt.
"They're not?"
"Well, as you can see, mine has black glitter letters. Yours has black embroidery with white trim. And look at the back."
He holds up his shirt.
"Mac Daddy. Nice." He sets it down and kisses my neck. "Your MacDaddy wants to take your jersey off."
"Don't you want to see the back of mine?"
"Can I see it when it's lying on the floor?" He grabs the hem of my shirt, ready to strip it off me.
"No!"
"Fine," he says, picking me up, flipping me over, and pinning me on the bed. "Mac Mommy? Oh, I get it, like I'm the daddy and you're the mommy."
Then after a few beats, he goes, "Uh, wait. Actually, no, I don't get it."
I smile at him over my shoulder, hoping it will sink in, while taking the opportunity to sit back up. I cross my legs in front of me and stare at him, a wide smile on my face.
He squints his eyes. "Wait. You went to the doctor today about us having kids."
I pull another item out of the box and hand it to him. "I did. Because this happened."
He looks down at the pregnancy test, the two pink lines still clearly visible.
"What is this?!"
"It's the pregnancy test I took this morning. I'm pregnant, Phillip."
"But you got your period!"
"I thought I did. I saw blood and assumed that's what it was. But the next morning, it was gone."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Because I didn't want to get your hopes up again. That's why I borrowed Lori's pregnancy book."
He puts both hands on his head. "I can't even believe this. You're sure?"
"Yes. Did you notice the numbers on our shirts?"
"I'm ten. You're one."
"That's our due date. October the first. Can you even believe it?"
He shakes his head. "No, I really can't."
I panic. "Did you change your mind? Do you not want me to be pregnant now?"
"No! I'm thrilled!" He grabs me and kisses me hard. "I think I'm in shock."
"I cried at the doctor's office. I was pretty shocked too."
"Good shock, though. Really, good shock." He wraps me in his arms and hugs me tight. "Holy shit. We're going to have a baby."
I start crying again.
"I'm so happy you're happy," I blubber.
"Princess, I thought our wedding day was the happiest day of my life."
"You told me that afternoon we spent in bed on our honeymoon topped it."
"You just topped them all. God, I love you." He kisses my face again. "We're really going to have a baby?"
"I love you too, Phillip. And apparently so."
"I'm going to spoil you rotten. The baby too." He gently lifts up my jersey and places his palm across my belly. "Wow. So how far along are you?"
"Five weeks."
"Already?"
"Yeah. And get this. Based on some magic chart the doctor had, he said we probably conceived on January eighth."
"That was the day you called off the wedding," he slowly states.
"And the day you asked me to marry you again."
"And then we went home."
"Yeah . . . And then we went home."
"To an incredible night filled with love," he says.
"It was the first time we really made love."
"It's perfect. You're perfect. Have you told anyone else? Is that why Danny and Lori left so early?"
"I told Danny I had something naked planned to get them to leave early."
"Phillip, nothing ever seems real until I tell you. I had to tell you first."
January 31st
Not that hungry.
I spend all day running around to different showrooms choosing specific items, so the builder can finalize our costs. The excavation of the land started while we were on our honeymoon and we're pushing to get the plans finalized and approved so we can start construction right away.
I'm exhausted and sitting on the couch when Phillip comes home.
He thrusts a gift bag at me and smiles. "A little something to celebrate your pregnancy. I'm still just in awe of the fact that we're having a baby. So, I was thinking you could open this present and then we could have a bottle of wine, eat dinner in bed, and make love all night long."
I stare blankly at him.
"Oh, shit. That's right. Well, I'll find you something bubbly to drink, I can have the wine, and we'll still make love all night long."
"Phillip, I haven't made anything for dinner. I've been running around all day and I'm exhausted."
"Oh, that's right. Women are really tired when they're first pregnant, right? Do you feel like going out?"
"Can I take a nap first?"
He sits down next to me, puts my feet on his lap, and massages them.
"Do I get this kind of treatment every night?" I ask with a contented sigh.
He leans over and kisses me. "You can have anything you want, Princess."
"Then I want a foot massage and--don't laugh--fried chicken."
"Your wish is my command," he says.
"You're being so sweet."
"I was crazy in love with you before, but knowing that you're having our baby. It's just incredible. I love you so much."
"I love you too. What's in the bag?"
"Oh, I almost forgot. Look inside."
I pull out a beautiful journal. The cover is a rugged leather but it's wrapped shut with dainty pale blue and green ribbons.
"It's beautiful, Phillip."
"Open it," he says.
I carefully untie it and see that the inside is just as beautiful as the outside. There is a wide array of papers inside, blue and green to match the ribbons, metallic, thin, thick card stock, watercolor, patterned, and plain.
"This is the coolest journal I've ever seen, Phillip. I love it."
"I thought you might want to start a journal."
"For the baby?"
"Yeah, like something she could read when she gets older."
"She?"
"I kind of think it's a girl," he says with a beaming grin.
"Why's that?"
"Father's intuition?"
"You're cute."
"Actually, I have no idea, but I don't want to call the baby it."
"So we should name it now?"
"Not a real name yet, maybe a nickname. But we're not gonna call it a little monkey like Danny does."
"Well, if you are Mac Daddy. I'm Mac Mommy . . ."
"We should call it Mac Baby?"
"Hmm. How about Baby Mac?"
He kisses me again. "Baby Mac it is. Now let's go get you some fried chicken."
I pull him back toward my lips as I slide my hand down the front of his pants. "Maybe I decided I'm not that hungry anymore."
He strips off my clothes then pulls me back on the couch.
Very quickly, he's holding my hips, guiding me up and down on top of him.
I toss my head back and start to breathe deeply. It feels so good.
He feels so good.
The front door bangs open, someone gasps, and I turn to see Danny and Lori standing in the foyer.
I throw my arm across my chest and duck down behind the sofa.
I'm mortified.
So mortified.
"Oh, sweet. We get dinner and a show," Danny quips.
"Danny," Lori chides, smacking his arm. "Um, Jade, call us, when you're uh, ready for dinner," she calls out as they back out of the door.
"Shoot! I forgot they were coming over. That was awkward," I say to Phillip.
He unwraps my arm, kisses my cleavage, and mutters, "I'm not done yet."
Then I forget all about Danny seeing my boobs.
Of course, I know that Danny will never let me forget it.
When Phillip calls and tells him we're going out for fried chicken and asks if they'd like to join us, he says something that causes Phillip to blush.
"What did he say to you?" I ask Phillip as we're getting in the car.
"Nothing," he says with a smirk. "Guy talk."
"No, that's wife talk. I'm not just some girl you got caught having sex with."
"Princess . . ."
"Don't Princess me."
He leans over and kisses me. If he doesn't watch it, I might throw up on him. I'm suddenly ravenously hungry and if I don't get food quickly, I think I'm going to be sick.
Pregnancy has turned me into a teenaged boy. I'm either hungry or horny.
"He didn't see anything, really. Said once he realized what was happening, you were already covered up."
"And what else? I know he said something dirty, Phillip. You blushed."
"Do you really want to know?"
"Probably not."
He kisses my hand. "Smart girl. Let's go get you some chicken."
I start giggling.
"What?" he says.
"He said something about deboning the chicken, didn't he?"
Phillip laughs, then coughs, he's laughing so hard. "I haven't heard that term in a while. Danny mentioned something about chicken head."
"Chicken head? What's that?"
"Think about it. How do chickens eat?"
I bob my head up and down, pretending I'm a chicken picking grain off the ground, trying to figure it out.
Phillip is laughing so hard, he's almost crying.
It's then I realize what it looks like I'm doing and start laughing too.
"Oh, I get it."
The good news is, when we get to the restaurant, the teasing about our couch sex keeps my mind off wanting to scream to the world that I'm pregnant.
When I get home, I'll make the first entry in my journal. Maybe that will help me keep our little secret.
CHAPTER ONE
Dear Baby Mac,
Phillip, your dad, bought me this journal so I could record our pregnancy. He thinks you might like to read it someday when you are older. That I will have some words of wisdom for you.
I should start by telling you how excited he is. We both are.
I'm still in shock, honestly.
My first words of wisdom: Antibiotics really can cause birth control to be ineffective. So if you are ever in that situation and don't want to get pregnant, be sure to use a condom. (Maybe I should make you read this before you go to college. LOL)
Honestly, I'll probably never let you read this--because knowing me, I'll write about something inappropriate--but it will be a fun way for me to track my pregnancy, how I'm feeling, and your growth.
Speaking of tracking your growth. Your dad is obsessed with it. In fact, he's already started a growth chart on the wall in your room. Right now, you are the size of an apple seed.
Isn't that crazy?
Dear Baby Mac,
I almost forgot . . .
The doctor told me that if you drink alcohol when you are pregnant but don't know it, your baby will still turn out normal.
So, thank god, you have that to look forward to.
February 2nd
They seem bigger to me.
I wake up to find Phillip staring at me.
"What are you doing?"
He gives me the sweetest grin. "Just looking at you."
"I know that. But why?"
He skims his hand across my chest, which is hanging out of the tank top I wore to bed.
I roll my eyes at him. "So, in other words, you were looking at my boobs, not me."
He chuckles. "Sorta. May
be. They seem bigger. Do they hurt?"
"Um, not really."
"Danny said that Lori's killed her during the first trimester. He said he could look but not touch. I felt sorry for him."
"Why?"
"Because it's like getting a new toy and not being able to play with it."
I playfully smack him. "You're goofy."
He presses his body fully against mine in what I'm supposed to think is a sweet hug, but is really a plea for morning sex. And, I have to admit, Phillip is so sexy in the morning, I can never resist him.
I nuzzle his neck and kiss the side of it.
He quickly responds by sliding his hand up my shirt.
But then he breathes out morning breath.
"Oh, gosh!" I jump out of bed and run to the bathroom.
And puke.
Sorta.
It's really more of a gagging than a puking. I sit on the bathroom floor and hold my face in my hands and breathe out in attempt to calm myself down. But then I realize my breath is a culprit too. I stand up, gag again, then quickly brush my teeth, which makes me gag some more.
Phillip wanders into the bathroom, his boxers leading the way.
I burst into tears.
"What's wrong?" he asks, pulling me into his arms.
"Brush your teeth," I sob.
He brushes his teeth then pulls me back into bed with him and runs his hand across my face.
"Why are you crying?"
"Is this what pregnancy is going to be like? You're going to make me gag? What the hell did we get ourselves into? I don't know if this is a good idea, Phillip."
"Well, it's a little late for that," he says. "Unless something unfortunate happens."
I suck in a big breath as my heart takes residence in my throat. "I didn't mean that! I don't know what I mean. I don't know what I'm saying. I don't want something unfortunate to happen!"
"I read that miscarriages are really common in the first few weeks. In the first trimester, really. It sucks, but it's reality."
"That's not going to happen to us, Phillip! Don't say that! Don't even think it! It can't happen to us!" I'm in a bit of a panic now. "We named it Baby Mac. I've already written in the journal!"
"Princess, calm down."
"Don't talk to me about reality and then tell me to calm down. You sound like you expect it to happen! Did you lie to me? Are you really not excited? Do you want me to have a miscarriage?"
"Of course not. I was sad when I thought you weren't. You know that. I'll admit, I am still in shock. But that brings up a question. When do you think we should tell our family and friends?"
"I don't know. Before this morning, I would have said right away."
