by Abra Ebner
“Hey, Em. Wait.” I ran after her, slamming the car door behind me. I grabbed her arm and she stopped, spinning on her heel.
“What?” She was pouting, her cheeks red with anger. Sexy anger. “Stop that!” She squealed.
The corner of my lip turned up. “Em, calm down.”
She huffed dramatically.
“I’m sorry, Em.” I dropped my hand from her arm. “Come on, you’ve got to let me have a little fun. After all, you can hear my thoughts. I think in retrospect, I have the worst end of this.”
The front door opened then, and I saw Jane look out into the yard. Shit, I’d forgotten about driving her home. I stepped away from Emily. Emily looked instantly hurt.
“Wes!” Jane yelled. “Where have you guys been?” Her face was demanding. I could hear her heart, too, her blood pumping as fast as Emily’s.
Emily scanned my face for excuses, knowing that though she was mad at me, the number one priority was hiding what had just happened, as we’d agreed.
“Er… we were getting something we needed for Math class,” I quickly replied.
I saw the door open more and a figure came out behind Jane. I felt my heart break as I recognized his face. What was he doing here? I hadn’t heard his heart as I had with Jane and Emily, and I wondered what that meant. I tilted my head, scanning his face. His expression seemed smug but also polite, which only angered me more. I narrowed my eyes, looking back at Emily and seeing she was gawking at the same thing I had. I wanted to know what she heard. Jane stood on the porch with her arms crossed against her chest.
Emily blinked a few times, in shock. I felt something else from her, a sour feeling, something like disappointment. I grumbled and turned away from all of them, walking across my own lawn and storming into the house. I couldn’t handle all the changes, the sounds. I slammed the door behind me, rushing upstairs where I went to my room and slammed that door as well. I threw myself on my bed, humming in an attempt to make the beating stop. A lump rose in my throat.
I hated him. I hated him.
Jane:
I watched Wes storming away, knowing that what he’d seen angered him. I exhaled, bowing my head. I’d made a mess of my life, and I knew nothing would ever be the same.
“You’re a real bitch, you know that, Jane?” Emily screamed from the lawn, storming toward me. She brushed past me, pausing and glaring over her shoulder before entering the house.
I turned, my eyes meeting Max’s. “I’m sorry.” I wanted to apologize for the fact that he had to see any of this.
Max smiled bleakly in return. “Maybe I should go.”
Perhaps he had picked up on the subtle jealousy I’d felt when I saw Emily and Wes so obviously engaged in some sort of intimate exchange. I knew that it was my idea to get them together, but I never expected to feel so confused about it. In truth, I was just hoping that it would make my guilt disappear, but that was hardly the result.
I nodded, making a fool of myself. Who was I kidding? Max was never going to like me after this. No one would. Why had I gotten things so tangled up with Wes? Why was everything falling apart? I was looking at my feet when I felt two strong hands grip either arm. A tingling sensation rushed through me.
“Don’t worry, Jane.”
Shocked, I looked up at Max. His eyes searched mine. He smiled—a smile so reassuring, so deep, that all my negative thoughts ceased. I felt overwhelmed by him, his beauty unlike anything I’d seen before. He let go of me, leaving my skin tingling.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Max turned then, bounding down the steps and to his car. I watched as a shiver ran down my spine, warming inside my stomach. I was coveting his body in a way I’d never coveted anyone’s body before.
I thought about the night with Wes and the way it had felt. It was awkward, as though the proper connection wasn’t there. I was crazy about Wes in a different way. It was unfair to lie to myself and try to feel something romantic when I didn’t. When I looked at Max, however, I felt tingles all over. I was drawn to him, as though I could never be close enough. I needed to learn that this feeling toward Max was real, and the one for Wes was based on nothing but history—a mere connection of time, not love.
Max got in the car, looking at me once more before backing out of the drive. He had a half smile on his lips, one dimple cutting into his left cheek where that simple little freckle lived.
I wouldn’t ruin this.
Emily:
I stormed to my room, slamming the door. Calm down, I told myself. You can’t suddenly become so territorial!
Wes and Jane had a complicated history, and I knew this from every thought in their heads. In the yard, it was overwhelming, but now that I’d had the chance to consider it, I knew that his confused thoughts were a necessary means to an end. Wes had some major transitioning to do, and I needed to understand that. This was only his first day dealing with this gift of his, or whatever it was. I’d been dealing with mine for as long as I could remember.
Hearing what everyone thought was a burden, and so this feeling of disorder wasn’t foreign to me. Things happened a lot faster in my world because I always knew everything. I lived in a place where secrets simply did not exist, unless I was keeping them. In fact, I envied secrets, and especially surprises. They keep us blissfully ignorant to the truths that hurt us. Is it better to know? Or is it better to wonder?
I thought about the way I used to understand what the dog was thinking. It certainly made caring for him a piece of cake, and being able to communicate across a boundary otherwise found impossible, was huge. It wasn’t like the dog’s thoughts were in English, but rather a series of urges and ambient noise. That was when I knew that the things I heard weren’t because I was crazy, but because they were real.
I went to the window, looking through the blinds. Wes’s room was diagonal to mine, but I would give anything to have it directly across, as Jane’s was. Wes’s blinds were shut. I released a spout of air, reaching for the journal under my pillow. I sighed dejectedly, touching the pages.
Shutting my eyes, I lifted my hand to my face, tracing my lips and feeling where Wes had kissed me. It was a passionate kiss, a kiss like I’d never experienced before. Most boys kissed me in a way that felt as though I could be anyone, that I was just another girl looking to get free drugs—a nobody.
It was obvious why I’d never had a real boyfriend. I was afraid of how it would feel to know what they were thinking. I was afraid that my jealousy would get the best of me, as it was threatening to do now. I began to wonder if I’d ever be able to love someone, especially when knowing their every critical thought made loving or feeling loved, hard.
I thought about Max then, wondering what it was I saw behind his eyes that felt so familiar to me. His thoughts were strange, the whispers unlike anyone else’s. They were organized and guarded, as though he knew someone might be out there listening. It was unsettling. No one had ever had thoughts that were so perfectly structured.
Then, there were the other thoughts I heard in his head. It was as though they weren’t his at all. Max kept them separated from his own, in their own special corner. Their noticeable lack of structure told me that he had no control over them, but still, they were there.
But why?
I did not understand what it was about the two new boys, but there was something. It was clear that Max’s whispers were different that Greg’s, because they did not cripple me with their mere sound. Greg’s were screaming, whereas Max’s just whispered, as though at peace.
What did it mean?
I was afraid for my sister. I did not want her to be near Max. No matter if he was good or bad, the bottom line was that his general existence creeped me out. Anything that made my skin crawl wasn’t a good sign. No matter how calm those whispers may be, they still weren’t right.
I heard a noise outside and went to the window to look. The blinds to Wes’s room were open, and I saw his face. He was looking toward my room, his breath fogging
the glass. I grabbed the cord to my blinds, tugging gently as I lifted them.
We locked eyes. He smiled. I gave him a little wave, and he waved back. I looked back to my room, trying to find a piece of paper. I rummaged through my desk, finding a torn portion from a spiral notebook and a red marker. I wrote ‘sorry’ in large messy print on the page.
When I went back to the window, Wes was still there, but he’d already had a piece of paper held there.
It read, ‘Come over.’
Max:
I was driving down the road away from Jane’s house when a dark figure was suddenly in the seat beside me.
“You’re so pathetic, Max.” Greg clicked his tongue.
“So are you.” I didn’t even bother to look at him.
Greg laughed. “I guess that’s what makes us brothers, then.” He began to play with the car, pushing buttons and adjusting the heat. “Why even drive, Max? To fit in? It’s much easier to simply appear, and disappear.” He snapped his fingers for effect.
I didn’t entertain him with an answer.
“Emily sure is a nice girl. Don’t you think?” He changed the subject, not that I liked the new one any better than the last. “I don’t think she likes you much, though. That’s too bad.” He was tugging on the seatbelt, his voice smug.
I glared at him. “Stay away from Emily, Greg.”
He gave me a dramatic pouty face that made my anger boil.
“Oh, why? She’s so cute. I don’t think I can resist.” He licked his lips in an inappropriate manner. “Her soul would align perfectly with mine.”
I slammed on the breaks as Greg’s body flew through the windshield and onto the hood of my car. His blood streaked the hood as he rolled onto the road. He lay there for a moment before moving, his bones cracking back into place. He groaned and stood with a humored expression.
“Ouch, Max.” He tilted his head as his neck cracked back into place. His cuts quickly stitched back together, the blood absorbing into his skin. Greg laughed, brushing off his clothes.
The door of a house nearby opened and a woman came running toward us, screaming. I narrowed my eyes at her and she stopped. I entered her mind, telling her lies, a thing I hated to do, but in this instance, it was necessary. She turned and walked back into the house as though nothing had happened. Greg laughed at me, walking back toward the passenger door and climbing inside. I continued forward, the windshield ruined as the air blew against our faces.
“Now look what you did.” Greg said it as though I’d simply broken a water glass. “At least I know you still have a talent for mind control, though you barely use it.”
“Stay away from Emily, Greg.”
He shook his head. “Afraid I can’t do that, Brother. Why—I think I’m in love with her.” He was being sarcastic, playing on my emotions for Jane.
“Why are you so Hell-bent on ruining me? No pun intended.” I turned onto Grand Avenue. People were staring at the blood stained car, but I didn’t care. Out here it wasn’t uncommon to hit a deer.
“Because, Brother,” he sounded annoyed. “I enjoy being powerful, don’t you? And with you on my side, I can bring Hell on Earth, literally.” He snorted. “Oh, but wait. You just want to fall in love. That’s right. With a human, no less.” He fell back against the seat, chuckling. The windshield was suddenly returned to its original glory, the blood gone. Greg was showing off.
I rolled my eyes. “I will never let you do that, and you know it’s true. There have been plenty before you that have tried the same thing. Far more powerful than you, might I add? They failed. You’ll fail. Everyone always fails.”
Greg snorted again. “So? They had it all wrong! They tried to do it alone, but see, you and I have a special connection, and together, our power is far stronger than any of those demons that failed before.” He laughed. “Just think—long ago, when Pandora left Heaven to cavort with the beautiful and weak men of Earth, do you think she ever expected that she was quite literally opening Pandora’s Box? She released these evils, our evil.”
I glared at him.
“It’s her fault that I want to kill every human here. It was her infidelities against the Heavens. You may as well join now, before you’re swept away in the aftermath.”
“I will never turn to the demonic side like you have. Don’t you get it?” I was tired of his games.
Greg was still smiling, as though he hadn’t heard a thing I’d said.
“I’ll find a way, Max. Someday you will see that this world does nothing but cause pain. One day, when Jane turns against you, then you will come crawling back to me, because you will see that you have nothing. You will see that humans are weak, that we are not meant to mix with them. And besides, do you really think she’s going to want to be with you once she figures out what you are? What do you think she’s going to say? ‘Oh, Max, I don’t mind that you’re dead. It’s sexy.’ That, my dear brother, will never happen.” Greg was mimicking a female voice rather poorly. “She is sexy, though. Isn’t she?” He growled like a cat. “I don’t blame you one bit!”
I clenched my jaw, disliking the way he was mocking me and Jane.
“You have it all wrong, Greg. You’re just afraid to admit that you wish you had someone to love, but you refuse to allow it into your heart. You’re afraid because you know your enemies outweigh your allies. People will be lined up down the block, just waiting to stab your dead heart out—if your heart still exists.”
He rolled his eyes. “Oh, Brother. You’re so dramatic.”
“You still forget that you were human once,” I challenged, as I often did.
Greg snorted. “A tragic part of my life I chose to put behind me.”
I tilted my head. “Magick has mixed to the point that angels will always co-exist within this world—one foot in the magickal realm, the other in the human.” My eyes narrowed. “I’ll kill you if that’s what it takes to remind you of your human roots.”
We were climbing up the mountain on the gravel road toward Erik’s house.
Greg smiled. “You would never kill me.” He leaned close to my ear. “You love me, you have to love me. If I die, you die. Remember?” He raised his eyebrows and let out a satisfied breath.
I mirrored his words. “And if I die, you die. Remember? I don’t fear crossing over as you do.”
The car rolled to a stop outside the house. The tall trees were blowing in the wind, making it seem ominous. The house was over one-hundred years old, passed down through the family of the alchemist that took Erik in.
I thought about our old house, and my own family, suddenly missing the way it was. My parents were well known in town, and a major influence in political circles. We were wealthy, one of the wealthiest families in Colorado. My mother and father founded the town of Glenwood Springs in 1886. But after a few years of happiness within the family, things began to fall apart as the truth about magick began to surface. It was no secret that my mother was involved with the alchemist, the thing that drove Greg to insanity. He thought it was horrid to see Mother cavorting with magickal beings, and though my father chose to ignore it, it tore Greg apart.
Even before that, though, I always knew something was different about Greg. I never paid it much mind because I was too swallowed by my own popularity and vanity to notice. Greg didn’t have the same friends as I did, if any at all—even if we were fraternal twins. When I finally did begin to notice his solidarity, I tried to include him, but by then, he no longer wanted any part of it.
I blame myself for what happened—I should have seen it. It is this guilt that has changed me from the self-centered seventeen year old I once was into the humanitarian I am in death. I have learned from my mistakes, but Greg still hasn’t.
“Ahhh…” Greg sighed, breaking my thought. “Eternal life is wonderful, isn’t it?”
I clenched my jaw, swallowing down my anger.
Eternal life was Hell.
My Hell.
Wes:
I quickly took my note
for Emily down from the window, seeing Jane storm into her room, afraid she would notice. I glanced at Emily one more time before ducking back. While I waited for Emily, I watched Jane from a distance—at an angle where she wouldn’t see me. I splayed my hands against the wall behind me as I leaned forward and exhaled. Our whole friendship was crumbling, but for whatever reason, it wasn’t bothering me the way I thought it should.
All my young adult life I thought she was it, that all I ever wanted was her. Now though, seeing him with her, I am finally beginning to realize she’s not. I couldn’t trust Jane while she was with him. Something about that Max kid was all wrong.
I lifted my hand from the wall and felt my head. The pill Emily had given me was admittedly making things bearable. My muscles felt soft and relaxed, and the thoughts in my head were clear and concise.
I got her now, and I understood why it was Emily took the drugs. I never expected that she would have issues as I had, as Jane had. She acted okay with it, though, more adult than Jane ever could. It was almost as though my whole issue wasn’t a big deal to her, but it made sense. Emily had dealt with her own problems all her life. She knew how to keep it a secret—she knew how to conceal.
It was clear that Emily and Jane had yet to share the existence of their gifts with each other. I knew it wasn’t my place to tell either of them, though conceivably Emily already knew about Jane’s if reading thoughts was indeed what she could do. All I knew was that I could never tell Jane my secret. How do I explain it to her? And if I did, would she even bother to understand, or dwell selfishly on her own problems?
In the course of one day, everything I once thought to be real no longer was. Every notion I once had about the things and people I thought I could depend on, I no longer could. I was lost.
