by Austin Bates
“I’m… so sorry, Mr. Bryce. I’ll come back later,” she said hurriedly before slamming the door and leaving me to stew in my shame.
“What a rude interruption,” Logan said as if it were the most natural thing in the world, pushing into me as if nothing had even happened. I half yelped, half cried out before lurching away and struggling to pull my jeans up. I narrowed my eyes at him in irritation, sputtering to come up with the words to tell him how audacious he was being. He watched me with a curious expression, as if he couldn’t understand what had me so worked up. “Where are you going?” I looked at him with dumbfounded expression.
“How can you ask me that? Did you not witness us just being walked in on?” I hissed, tensing my hands at my sides. He chuckled under his breath before raising a curious brow.
“So? It’s not like she’s going to tell anyone. This wouldn’t be the first time she’s walked in on me fucking someone on my desk,” he said casually, not bothering to pull up his pants. He simply allowed his cock to bob in a way that he probably thought was tempting. I could only scowl, crossing my arms defensively as I realized my shirt was ruined and there was no way to leave the office with any amount of dignity.
“Do you think hearing that I’m just one of your little sluts is actually going to make me feel better about this shit show? God, Logan. I don’t know why I keep letting this happen. I don’t know why you tempt me so much-- it’s like I’ve lost all semblance of self-control,” I said, just managing to get the words out through gritted teeth. I ran my hands through my hair, resisting the desire to rip it out. “I’m done. We’re done. This can’t keep happening. I refuse to allow it.” He obviously wanted to try and convince me to stay, but I was rushing towards the door before he had the chance to speak.
“Aaron, you really believe I just think of you as one of my sluts?” he asked, sounding slightly wounded. I knew it was just a trick to try and lure me back, but a part of me wondered if he could possibly be sincere. I wanted to push that thought away, so far away that my resolve wouldn’t be weakened. Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes in spite of myself, but I rushed out the door before he could say anything more. I slammed the door behind me, hurrying down the sidewalk to flag a cab. I had to get to my office as soon as possible. I wanted to run home with my tail between my legs to be honest, but I had to maintain some kind of dignity. It wouldn’t reflect well to let this mess affect me any more than it already had. Fortunately, I kept a spare shirt in my office in case of emergencies-- though when I thought of emergencies, I had been thinking more along the line of accidental spills. I could have never predicted the current issue, but I was grateful for my foresight just the same.
I hoped Cieran would be away from his office so I didn’t have to deal with his scrutiny. I knew Cieran was an understanding person overall, but I didn’t want to look like a total idiot in front of anyone. Of course, that would have been all too convenient and at that point expecting things to remotely go my way was laughable. The moment I stepped through the door everyone’s gaze was directed towards me-- and to make matters all the more unfortunate, Cieran wasn’t the only one in the room. It seemed he was interviewing a potential omega for the app, and the young man looked at me with a rather unsettled expression. Cieran was immediately on his feet, moving towards me. I absolutely did not want to have the conversation I was sure he would force me to engage in, so I swiftly edged past him to hurry into my personal office.
“Aaron, what’s going on--” I quickly closed and locked the door, unwilling to discuss the issue. I pressed my back against the door before sliding down. I drew my knees up my chest, burying my face in my hands. I wasn’t sure how things could get any worse at that point. My father had already disowned me for my association with the ECSD app, without having the slightest idea of what was going on between Logan and myself. Logan had seemed so sure that his secretary would keep her mouth shut, but I couldn’t count on that. At any given moment, the rumors could begin circulating and I knew I wouldn’t be able to look any of my coworkers in the eyes ever again. Any respect I may have earned, all that I had worked for, would disappear in a flash. I would just be known as Logan’s bitch. That didn’t even take into consideration that my dad could catch wind of what was happening. If I had any hope of gaining his affection again, it would be blown to smithereens. That phone conversation had made it painfully apparent that I was on thin ice.
Snippets of the conversation flashed through my mind, particular venomous things I never thought I’d hear my father say. I couldn’t understand how anyone would talk to their child like that, but I shouldn’t have been surprised. Our relationship had never been a good one, but I’d never felt so hated by my father in my life.
“Only an idiot would associate themselves with this shitshow.”
“Do you really want to gain notoriety for your connection to such a salacious application?”
“I’ve told you time and again that playing with computers isn’t a real job.”
“You’re bringing shame to the family name.”
“I’m disappointed in you.”
“I have no son.”
The thoughts swirled through my mind like a hurricane, and I kept my face tucked against my knees to try and stifle the inevitable sobs. Tears streamed down my cheeks and I cursed my dad for not bothering to understand my dreams. I cursed Logan for wanting to bring this project to the East Coast to begin with. More than anything, I cursed myself for being unable to grow a spine. A part of me knew that if I simply stood up to my father, he would gain a fraction of respect for me. I’d let him bowl me over for my entire twenty-four years, and we were at the point that he knew I would take his abuse without protest. I had never put up a fuss or a fight, and I was certain it was too late to put my foot down now. Would I make the same mistake with Logan? Was I just so easily intimidated by alphas?
No. I refused to let this go on. I may have ruined my relationship with my father, but I was going to learn to respect myself and demand everyone else do so as well. I would no longer be any alpha’s punching bag. If that meant I would be single my whole life, I could live with that. I had to prioritize my own happiness for once. I’d spent my whole life putting the needs of others beyond my own, to the point of near martyrdom. Never again. I had gone from being cripplingly depressed to shaking with anger once again. I was angry at myself for allowing this to go on so long, and I was angry at my father for a lifetime of putting me down. Even the slightest inkling of a thought about Logan made me want to explode, and I found myself lurching to my feet to rush towards my computer. If he was going to toy with my life, he had no right to my work. I wouldn’t be used in such a way. The temptation to delete the entire script I’d provided for the ECSD application was nearly too strong to ignore, but I was ripped from my blind fury by the obnoxious tone that indicated I’d received an email.
Sitting behind my desk, I spent longer than I’d like to admit simply staring at the files on the ECSD server. It would have been so easy to wipe everything out, throwing Logan and the entire operation back to square one. The sheer amount of cash that he would need to put back in to get anywhere near launching the app was monumental. Other investors would back out, and his biggest success would become his biggest failure. I didn’t like to think I was a cruel person, but I wanted Logan to suffer as much as I had. More, if possible. The email notification sounded once more and I rolled my eyes before checking my new messages. There were two emails from Cieran. The first one was inquiring about my wellbeing, and I didn’t even get halfway through the email before angrily deleting it. The fact that anyone would ask if I was okay was laughable. Of course I wasn’t okay. I hadn’t been okay in a long time, if ever, and some bullshit email wasn’t going to make things better. I knew directing my anger at Cieran was irrational, but I couldn’t make myself care about whether my actions were fair. Fair had always seemed to come at my expense.
The second email had a single word in the subject line: Testimonials. I was
tempted to delete it before even opening it, but my curiosity got the better of me. Scanning over the message, my heart twinged painfully. It was made up of statements from those who had found their happily ever after with the help of ECSD, and there seemed to be hundreds of them. A bitter part of my mind told me that it wasn’t any of my concern, but the larger part recognized that I couldn’t destroy something that had changed so many lives for the better. Nothing could justify that, not even my current hatred for Logan. However, that left the matter of taking care of my own needs, which definitely involved getting as far away from Logan as possible.
The app had been my baby for what seemed an eternity, even if I felt some resentment towards it. I’d always meticulously annotated each line of code, though I never truly anticipated having someone else work on the app’s programming. It was done more for my inner perfectionist than necessity. Still, the fact that I’d gone through the trouble could definitely prove to be worthwhile. The work needed to engineer such an extensive application required plenty of experience, but knowing my approach and the purpose of each function would make finding a replacement much easier. It was just a matter of doing so without anyone finding out until I was ready to leave. If Logan knew about my intentions to find a replacement, he would definitely try to talk me out of it. Even if I was angry at him, I still recognized the effect he had on me. If he begged me to reconsider, I actually would. It was ridiculous, but my desire to please him could override my logic at times.
His method would be predictable, as it had been a point he’d made a thousand times over. He would butter me up with talk of being the backbone of this whole project, tell me that no one’s work could ever compare to mine. In the past I may have thought there was some merit in those declarations. I was less confident in his verity as it stood, but as much as I resented myself for it, I knew there was a chance I’d fall victim to his charms again. For all his shortcomings, Logan seemed to know just the right buttons to press. My mind flickered to the day we’d been matched, and I squeezed my eyes shut against the tears. I had been so confident in the algorithm, and no matter what I changed, the results were the same. Perhaps it was better, then, to have someone else working on the project. If I couldn’t even find the bug that kept pairing me with my boss, I clearly wasn’t as skilled as I thought. A voice in the back of my mind pointed out that there was an alternative, but it wasn’t one I wanted to consider. Either I had failed as a coder, or I was turning my back on the person I was meant to be with.
I refused to believe that, regardless of the algorithm. Logan was not my soulmate. We could never be together. It wouldn’t work. He would never stop baiting and taking advantage of me, just as he would never stop sleeping with anyone that caught his eye. I wouldn’t be enough for him unless I completely gave in to his every whim. His were wandering eyes, and I wasn’t anything special-- even if he felt something for me, it wouldn’t last. Another pretty omega would cross his path and I’d be discarded like garbage. I had to stop entertaining this idea that Logan cared about me, and I especially had to stop caring so much in turn. I had to look out for my best interests because I realized at that point that no one else would. I had no one to rely on, no rock in this churning ocean called life. I was done waiting for someone to give me the love I craved so much, and I was done fantasizing about happily ever afters.
I was going to find a replacement, put ECSD in my past and never look back.
It was the only option.
12
Logan
I wanted to throw something at my secretary as soon as she opened the door, a feeling that was only amplified by Aaron’s extreme overreaction to being caught. I hadn’t been lying-- my secretary knew how to keep her mouth shut. It was part of the reason she’d been part of my staff for so long. Yet, my reassurance only seemed to make things worse. I couldn’t quite understand how Aaron was under the impression he was just like any other omega I’d screwed around with. I thought it was pretty obvious that I didn’t chase after anyone, and if someone didn’t want to be with me-- their loss. I had put more work into getting closer to Aaron than I had put into any relationship before. What was even more frustrating was the fact that he refused to acknowledge that our attraction was a mutual one. He insisted that I was taking advantage of his position, that I was using my power to manipulate him somehow. I would never force an omega to have sex with me. If he had consistently refused me, I would have happily moved on with my life. However, his desire was obvious regardless of how much he tried to hide it. He was repressing himself, and that would have been fine if I’d not felt such a connection to him.
When he bolted, I considered trying to call and smooth things over, but considering his tendency to send me to voicemail, I decided it wasn’t worth wasting either of our time. After all, I had a momentous gala to prepare for. There was so much to do, and I could only hope Aaron would do his part if I left him to his own devices. Perhaps I’d have Cieran check in and keep him in line-- though there didn’t seem to be any love lost between Cieran and myself lately. I could only wonder what Aaron had been telling him, but I didn’t linger on that thought. All that mattered for the time being was throwing an amazing launch party for the application we’d all worked so hard on. The time spent agonizing over perfecting things and pushing everything else aside would pay off. I intended to make the party the most exciting event of the year, a place where we could show off the fruit of our labor and still have fun. As much as I wanted to continue chasing Aaron, it would have to be placed on the backburner.
My work seemed endless when making the final preparations, and the night of the whole shebang came much more quickly than I expected. They said time flew when you were having fun, but pulling the party together had been anything but fun. Fun hadn’t been the point at the time, I had to make everything perfect so the night would be as enjoyable as possible for everyone involved. Still, as I observed the final result just shy of time for people to start arriving, it all felt worthwhile. The decor was tasteful, shades of black and gold to frame the regal atmosphere. Finding a venue had been surprisingly easy once I put out some feelers-- one of the more prominent alphas who had found success with the app owned an extravagant hotel and volunteered the space for the Gala. Titus had insisted that we could book the hotel for free, citing that it was the least he could do. Of course, I wasn’t a heartless bastard, and I didn’t take charity either.
We’d agreed on a slightly reduced rate, and for the cost, the venue had turned out more magnificent than I could have imagined. The central atrium had been converted into an immaculate ballroom, at which a large podium had been assembled towards the back of the room. The speeches and presentations weren’t going to be terribly long affairs, and I wanted to leave plenty of room for the dancefloor. There was a bar, of course, and a selection of cocktail foods. I was running a quick check to ensure everything was as it should be, and adjusted the placement of the masquerade style masks near the entrance almost obsessively. It may have seemed selfish, but I couldn’t deny wanting a repeat of the first time I’d been with Aaron. At the very least, I wanted him to be reminded of the events that transpired in that closet-- it had meant something to me, and I wanted him to know as much. The masks were extremely varied, and guests had their choice of which to wear. There was a mask that had been marked reserved, a near replica of the one that Aaron had worn on that fateful night. I smiled as I pictured his reaction upon seeing it. He would unquestionably know it was intended for him.
Guests soon began to arrive and nearly every one of them spent at least a few seconds fussing over the masks and decor. It was nice to see that the work I’d put into things was appreciated. I couldn’t just stand around smugly, however. I obviously took the time to greet couples and prospective clients as they arrived. I lingered near the entrance as much as I could, and being a greeter of sorts gave me an excuse even though such a task was beneath me. I was admittedly nervous, as shameful as such a thing was for such a successful alpha male. I’d be
en trying to touch base with Aaron and talk things over, but he’d rebuffed any attempts to discuss our situation. He’d kept things entirely professional, which I should have been grateful for. Still, I worried he wouldn’t show up for the party at all. My selfish reasons for wanting to see him aside, he played a big part in things. The presentations couldn’t officially begin until he arrived-- I’d not made a backup plan, which was unlike me, but I trusted Aaron. He was angry at me, that much was obvious, but he was also loyal to a fault-- if not to me, then the app itself.
Music filled the room and my guests mingled as I’d expected. A few knew each other before the release of the app, and many had met through it in some way or another. It was a relaxed atmosphere, and I should have let it wash over me. Instead I was as antsy as a cat on a hot tin roof. I hadn’t considered the possibility that Aaron might skip the party altogether, it had seemed so unlikely that I felt justified in thinking it was impossible. Standing around the entrance and waiting wasn’t doing anything to soothe my frazzled nerves so I strode across the room. I smiled and shook hands as I went, ever the social butterfly I needed to be in such occasions. I sighed in relief when I reached my destination-- the full sized bar. I ordered the strongest thing on the menu, standing awkwardly between two bar stools as the bartender mixed my drink. Fortunately, we weren’t quite at max capacity yet, and it was likely a bit early to be drinking already. Still, when I was given my drink, I made no attempt to hide what I was doing. I maintained my confident stance, sipping from the glass occasionally and making small talk when it was appropriate.
I was just beginning to feel the slightest buzz when my secretary walked towards me with a reproachful smile. Whatever she had come to report had her slightly unnerved, so I attempted a gentle smile. It only seemed to make her more uncomfortable. Wordlessly, she pointed towards the entrance where a familiar figure was just coming inside. I thanked her, hurrying to try and find a better vantage point. I didn’t want Aaron to know I was watching him, and I didn’t care how creepy my behavior could have been interpreted as. I managed to find a place just in time to see his cheeks flush as he picked up the reserved mask. He smiled so briefly that I almost missed it before his expression turned annoyed. He looked away from the mask, and I knew without a doubt that he was looking for me. It was a bit too early to confront him, so I swiftly made an attempt to get lost in the crowd. I just managed to see him put the mask on in spite of his irritation, and my heart swelled.
