It took Kerry a moment to decide how she felt. From the beginning, she’d told herself she wouldn’t get involved past the initial introduction. Now that the moment arrived, she was failing the test. She’d practically gift wrapped the perfect man for Rhys. Better yet, she’d delivered him already unwrapped. Fuck this. She knew exactly how to feel. She was pissed off.
“I’m going to kill him.”
Kurt scoffed. “I hardly think bloodshed is necessary.”
Once again, there was something about Kurt’s tone. It seemed a bit too helpful. Kerry narrowed her eyes at him. Why had he chosen to warn her of his intentions instead of simply taking what he wanted? Unless, he meant for her to intervene. His expression gave nothing away. Damn it. Even knowing his game, she was powerless against it. He was like some sort of rock star at addling people’s brains.
“You’re a romantic at heart, aren’t you?” she asked, taking a stab in the dark.
His expression still didn’t change. “Don’t cast asperations on my character. I’m simply clearing the playing field of all opponents before setting up my next move.”
It was an art form, Kerry decided, even as she gave in. “Fair enough.”
She watched it happen and couldn’t figure out how he managed to leave her confused about his intentions. In the grand scheme of things, this issue had little effect on Kerry’s life. She could only imagine how Kurt impacted someone’s heart. He could easily make a person insane.
“What’s it like inside your head?”
She’d not meant to ask the question. In fact, she sort of wanted to punch herself in the face the second it left her mouth. There was a genius to his maddening ways. She really wanted to know the answer. A smile—devastating in its wickedness—spread across his face.
“It’s dark, but there’re chains, paddles and a ton of other fun things, so it’s all good.”
Holy shit. She just bet it was.
* * * * *
From his vantage point, Rhys had a good view of the ring. He hadn’t expected to be able to see a thing considering the huge mob in attendance. Fortunately, they all pressed as close as possible to the steel wire leaving the space near the back, where his private waiting room was located, almost empty. Rhys did his best to hide his surprise when he spotted his family in the crowd. If there had ever been a time they’d all showed up to support him at one time, he couldn’t remember it. Dane, Kerry, Mandy, and Knox all gathered near the edge of the cage. As short as Kerry was, she ended up being the first one to see him. She tugged at Dane’s arm to get his attention. He glanced in Rhys’ direction as she spoke near his ear. Breaking free of the group, she began weaving her way through the throng. She’d never make it. Snagging the attention of a nearby security worker, Rhys sent him to fetch Kerry before she ended up crushed.
He’d intentionally avoided her since the disastrous Grid Iron incident. Sometimes things weren’t anyone’s fault. Other times everyone was guilty. He wasn’t sure yet which category they fell under. Her smile seemed strained when she finally reached his side.
“Thanks for sending help.”
“What sort of brother would I be if I let you fend for yourself?”
It was an asshole move. He knew it. She winced at the question.
“Can we talk?”
“We are,” he pointed out. He didn’t know why he couldn’t give her an inch. There was something about Kerry that always made him want to strike first. Perhaps she saw him too clearly. She eyed a group of women who were inching closer.
“Don’t you have some private room or something? You know, to get dressed or whatever?”
Blowing out a breath, he motioned her forward. The moment they were alone, she went straight for the gut.
“Why aren’t you answering Asher’s calls? He really cared about you, damn it. I swear. You’re such an ass—”
Rhys’ temper hit the roof. “Goddamn it, Kerry,” he half-yelled, cutting her off. “Did it ever it occur to you that maybe I’m the one who ended up crushed?” Throwing his arms wide, he added. “What do you want from me? Obviously, you needed to see me bleed. Well, here it is. You’ve seen it. Are you satisfied?”
To his surprise, her eyes filled with tears. With a growl, he tilted his head back. A moment of staring at the ceiling calmed him.
He finally asked the question that had been eating at him. “What did you hope to gain?”
“Your happiness.” Her voice broke on the confession. She cleared her throat. “I swear, I never meant—” She broke off, as if she couldn’t go on. A sad smile tugged at his lips.
“No tears when I get my heart broken,” he reminded her. “I promised.”
Kerry blinked rapidly and the tears gathering in her eyes slid down her cheeks. She didn’t bother swiping at them. “You sacrificed your happiness for Knox and Mandy. There was this small part of me that almost expected you to jump in at the wedding and try to stop it, even though they were already married, but you didn’t. You stood there at your brother’s side. It killed you. I could see it, but you did it.” Casting a desperate look around the sparse room, she headed for the only chair. It was an uncomfortable steel folding chair, but she sank down onto it as if it were her last hope in the world. She stared at her hands while she spoke. “The expression on your face, it reminded me of exactly how I felt the moment they began shoveling dirt into my first husband’s grave. It’s a silent pain so loud, you think you’ll go deaf.”
Her words shocked Rhys to his core. They didn’t know much about each other, he realized.
“What happened to him?”
“He was killed in a motorcycle accident. I became someone I didn’t know any longer after his death. There were several times I didn’t think I’d ever feel anything again.”
“The thing with Mandy and Knox, I can’t fault anyone for that,” he heard himself admitting in the face of her sharing. “The better man won.”
“You’re a good man too, Rhys. You deserve happiness. When I made that bet with you, I really had no idea what I was going to do. Obviously, there was no way I could act on it, but I also couldn’t stand there and do nothing. As soon as Affinity popped in my mind, for some reason, I thought of Asher. I don’t know if you know this, but it was his first time there, as well.”
Rhys dropped his gaze to the floor. He had not known. Not that it mattered, except it did.
“He’s been a member at Grid Iron for as long as I have worked there. We’ve been friends for the same length of time. When I called him, he was horrified.” Kerry chuckled as if she was picturing the moment in her head. “But, I said, don’t tell me you don’t have some kink in you. All those business suits and the stuffy proper language are hiding something. I’m willing to bet money when the door closes on your bedroom, you swing from the light fixtures.”
In spite of everything, Rhys snorted. He would have given anything to have been a fly on the wall for their conversation. “I can’t believe you convinced him to do such a thing.”
A mischievous smile touched her lips. “He said, ‘I will have you know I would never have something as gaudy in my home as a light fixture sturdy enough to hold a full-grown man.’”
She did such a good impression of Asher, Rhys could picture him saying it.
“I told Asher, ‘You have to see this guy. He has the most beautiful brown eyes and the most gorgeous soul I’ve ever seen. If you get there and you don’t want him, give me the signal. I will figure something else out, but if you don’t go, you’re going to miss out on the greatest guy ever.’”
Rhys swallowed hard past the lump growing in his throat. He’d thought she hated him. She’d given him the greatest gift in the world.
He had to clear his throat twice before finding his voice. “It really was addictive, you know?”
She scrunched up her forehead showing her confusion. “What was?”
“Having Ash love me in return,” he explained. “My whole life, I’ve never had that. I didn’t have parents who loved me,
and my brothers fell apart under the strain. It has always been only me. Then came Ash.” He froze incapable of speaking another word.
Kerry began shaking her head. She came to her feet. “I don’t understand, Rhys. You love him and he loves you.”
“He’s ashamed of his feelings for me.” Rhys let the words fall between them before he lost the courage to force his tongue to shape the syllables needed in order to say them. Now that they were hanging in the air, Rhys felt a sharp blow in his gut. It was one thing to know the truth quietly inside his head. It was another to say them aloud and give them life.
“Why would he be ashamed?”
A man wearing a bright-yellow special event shirt, stuck his head in the door. “You have five minutes, Mr. Collier.”
Rhys nodded and waved the man away.
“We ran into Drew. Asher pretended he was meeting me for business. Then he brushed me off as if I was only a client as he ran out of the building.”
“Asher? Really? That doesn’t make any sense. He doesn’t have any reason to hide anything. He’s open about his life and sexuality. Why would he do such a thing?”
Rhys headed for the door. He couldn’t be late for his match. “It’s me,” he told her. He paused right before stepping through the doorway. “Nobody in their right mind would openly love someone like me. But for the record, he completely owned me. Heart and soul, they were his. He didn’t feel the same and if I’ve learned anything in the past year, it’s that I can’t make people do anything. I am damned tired of trying.”
Leaving Kerry behind, he snagged one of the members of the security team charged with escorting him to the ring. With the instructions given to help Kerry back to her seat, he forced his mind to go blank. On the march to the cage, he began counting backward from a hundred. Looking neither right nor left, he focused on his opponent. They’d met before. It would end the same. Announcements blared through the speakers. The noise of the crowd became a buzz in the back of his head. They were alone as far as Rhys was concerned. Rules were read. He didn’t hear a word of it. Didn’t matter. He knew them by heart. Rounds set at five minutes. No pussy moves. He had it.
His opponent went by the name of Williams. It was his last name, but if Rhys had ever heard his first name, he couldn’t recall it. The bottom half of his face was covered with an unkempt beard. It helped keep the man’s emotions hidden.
Since Rhys was pissed off at life in general for being such a suck-ass little bitch, he didn’t feel the need to hide his emotions from a damn soul. The bell rang. Williams bounced on his toes. Rhys didn’t feel up to dancing. Instead, he rushed the mat, closing the distance between them, landing a solid right hook to the dude’s cheek. The crowd audibly cringed at the sound of Rhys’ fist connecting with bone. Once his initial burst of anger passed, he remembered why he never used that move. If he didn’t knock his opponent out in one blow, it was really going to piss them off. Which is what happened with Williams. He came at Rhys with everything he had.
Rhys prided himself on his ability to judge the outcome of a match within the first few seconds. This match would end in tap out or knock out. Points weren’t going to mean a damn thing. They were both too angry. Their emotions were making them vicious in their attacks. Rhys swiped at Williams’ legs, but it didn’t have the result he’d been hoping for. Instead, Williams had been ready for the move. Using Rhys’ momentum against him, he tackled him to the floor. Before Rhys could gain purchase, Williams had him pinned on his stomach and was sitting on his spine while yanking his head backward. The move twisted his body into a painful position.
The temptation to tap out rode heavy on Rhys. The pressure on his spine increased. Straining upward, he made another attempt to unbalance Williams. Time seemed to slow. The shifting of the restless crowd held him transfixed. A young guy decked out in Goth stepped to his right. Just like that, Rhys was staring at Asher. Unlike everyone else surrounding him, Asher didn’t move. Their gazes collided. There wasn’t a single hint of emotion on Asher’s face. It didn’t matter. His presence gave Rhys strength. With a short jab above his head, he caught Williams across the ear. When the move caused him to attempt a block, Rhys rolled, unbalancing him. He didn’t stop until he reversed their roles. With Rhys now on top, he used every ounce of strength pulling Williams’ chin high while sitting on his spine. The palm tapping the mat sent a roar through the building that caused Rhys’ ears to ring.
Shooting to his feet, Rhys searched the crowd with his eyes. When his gaze landed upon his, Asher dipped his chin in a quick nod. The official said something Rhys didn’t hear, but he dutifully raised his arm when urged to do so. Asher had shown up then he turned his back on Rhys. Weaving his way through the mad crush, Asher headed for the door. Rhys wanted to call his name and beg him to stay. The blow of watching Asher leave nearly caused Rhys’ knees to buckle. He’d not let Drew down. The title still belonged to him. Once more, Rhys had managed to prove to himself he was worthy of his place in life. None of it meant a goddamn thing.
Chapter Nine
It wasn’t over. The fantastic view from his living room no longer brought him peace. Everywhere Asher looked, he saw Rhys. His ghost drove away Asher until each night his hours at the office became later. Seeing Rhys, holding his gaze, those things had been his undoing for the past two days. Asher absently ran his fingers along the slight ridges of Kurt’s card while staring at the corner. It wouldn’t mean anything if he called. There was an invisible line in the sand. If Asher chose to step over, there would be no going back. Things would truly be over with Rhys the moment he called Kurt. He slid his phone closer. Could he take the final step? Rhys didn’t want him any longer. His fingers curled around the receiver. All it would take was the push of a few buttons. He could burn his bridges while still standing on them. His self-destruction would be complete. The door to his office flew open. With a regretful sigh, he dropped the handset back in place. One day he’d remember to lock up on time.
D’Ettore & Bronson was not a large enough establishment to contain the fury Asher saw in Kerry’s expression as she stormed inside. His chair creaked as leaned back. Gripping the armrests, he watched her pace the length of his desk. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he’d been expecting this. Even though they’d been friends for years, her new family tie to Rhys left her loyalties divided. Not to mention, she had every right to her anger. He welcomed it. Any punishment she deemed fitting would not be enough as far as he was concerned. He’d denied Rhys publicly. Even the thought of it made him sick to his stomach. It didn’t matter he’d wanted to save Rhys from scorn. The look on Rhys’ face wouldn’t leave Asher’s mind.
With each pass, Kerry allowed her fingers to slide along the surface of his desk. Asher focused on the motion to keep from confessing everything. “I shouldn’t have let you get inside my head.” Those words haunted him. He’d let Rhys into more than his head. It took him a moment to realize Kerry had stopped pacing. Instead of the explosion he’d been expecting, Kerry’s tone was questioning.
“Has it occurred to you to wonder as to why no one has managed to snag Rhys permanently? He certainly isn’t lacking in any way.”
Thrown off balance by her inquiry, he said the first thing that popped in his head. “I assumed he had not met his match.” It was an honest answer. However, he barely stopped himself from adding, before now.
A sad look passed over Kerry’s features. “Oh, he’s met his match.”
Asher tried to hide how the information crushed his soul. His brain screamed that he was Rhys’ other half, but his tongue refused to give up his secrets. Thankfully, Kerry took mercy on him by continuing without encouragement. “You see, Rhys fell in love once. He did what he knows how to do, keep quiet. He expected her to reject him since everyone always has. I don’t know how much you know about his childhood. It wasn’t good.”
“I only know his parents have passed.”
“Hmm,” Kerry said noncommittally. “That’s not exactly true. His mother is alive and w
ell, somewhere or another. She left when he was a baby and his father killed himself a year or so ago.”
Asher attempted to make a few sympathetic noises while his heart broke for Rhys. Kerry waved them away. “He’s much better for the loss, trust me. The problem is, he didn’t expect the woman he fell in love with to care about him. After all, no one has ever openly wanted him.”
Asher scoffed, but the somber look on Kerry’s face caused the sound to die in his throat. “You can’t be serious?”
“Well, have you seen him? God was in a very good mood the day he created Rhys. I imagine fear would freeze your lips together even as he set your body on fire. How could anyone feel good enough to hang onto him?”
He couldn’t argue with her logic. Wasn’t it why he’d stayed quiet? “Yes. He is the type who makes you want to hear him declare himself. Otherwise, you’re only another in a long line of fools.”
“Exactly!” Kerry cried. “Can you imagine what it must be like to be trapped inside his head? To him, it must seem as if he’s never, ever quite good enough for anything other than warming someone’s bed. Do you know this is why I chose you?”
“Your reasoning escapes me at present.”
Kerry flashed a mischievous smile. “I knew he would love you. How could he not? You’re an amazing person. More importantly, I truly believed you were strong enough to claim him. The person who screams their love for Rhys, without an ounce of ignominy, will end up with the sexiest, most faithful man in the world. It’s a shame I was wrong about you.”
A surge of anger ran through him. “What in the hell is that supposed to mean?”
Kerry’s face hardened showing her true feelings. “When your test came, you were like everyone else, embarrassed of having lost your heart to him. I can’t imagine the blow he endured when he realized it. His pain is so much deeper than most because he gives away every ounce of happiness and keeps none for himself.”
Unequaled Page 12
