by Zelda Knight
For me.
I’m not sure whether or not I should be grateful. It seems silly but I know this is a big deal for him and I don’t want to take it for granted. I bring my hands up to cup his face. I want to slow things down so my head can break free from the haze. But the second my lips touch his, all rational thought disappears. All I care about is his hands on me, touching me, claiming me. I want to be his. Even that fated mate bullshit. I want all of it, as long as it belongs to him.
I drop my hands from his face so I can clutch his shoulders. I sink my nails into him even though the thin material of his shirt is there. He grunts, approving. My pelvis pulsates with need.
He reaches for the hem of my shirt and yanks it over my head. I’m not sure where it lands, but it disappears somewhere in the living room, despite our position in the kitchen.
So much for slowing things down. I don’t think that’s a possibility for me and Rex. I don’t even care.
His hands cup my breasts, and despite the fact that I’m wearing an old Target bra that is not sexy in the least, I feel as though he’s touching my flesh. My nipples marble underneath his palms and I hiss, pressing myself against him even more.
I need him to touch me more.
I close my eyes as Rex pulls himself away, only to claim my throat. I’m sure he’s going to leave a mark on me like he’s some hormone-crazed boy that can’t control himself during a Victoria Secret commercial. I don’t even care. I want it. Anything he wants to give to me, I want more than anything.
Somehow, I manage to take off his shirt. It helps that he gives me access to his body instead of demanding control from me. Essentially, I can do whatever it is I want to him and he has to deal with it. I run my fingers up and down his bare chest. I’ve seen it plenty of times, but I still can’t get over how enchanted I am by it. Every muscle twitches under my touch, the solid frame immovable. A thrill sweeps through my body. I’m obsessed with him, with what he feels like. If I can touch him like this when I want, I’d be a happy person.
My hands stop at his waist, at the abrupt shift from skin to denim. My fingers fumble as they begin to unbutton his pants. It’s like I’m a teenager again, not a grown woman with experience. It’s almost embarrassing, but I try not to think about it. Rex has this effect on me. It’s not necessarily a bad thing. It keeps me honest.
All of his talk of fated mates and how the two of us are destined to be together doesn’t bother me the way it used to. If anything, it compels me to want him more.
I tug at the jeans, trying to strip them away from his body. I’m having a good go of it, but he has to step in and help me.
By the time we’re both finished, he’s left in merely his underwear and I’m fully clothed, though probably with a hickey or two on my neck.
Both of us are panting. Both of us are staring at each other. I’ve done this with him plenty of times before. I should be used to it. I know what’s going to happen next and it’s exactly what I want. And yet, I can’t move. There’s an added layer that isn’t there before, and I think it has to do with this whole fated mate nonsense.
I like knowing Rex wants me. I even like knowing Rex is tender underneath all that shrapnel. But I can’t help but wonder if we’d be good again. If we were good at all.
But then he steps forward and begins to strip me down. I don’t move. I let him do it.
When I’m finally naked, his eyes feast on me like I’m Thanksgiving and he hasn’t eaten all day just for this. My insides turn over, they spark, they flame up, and I burn. When he touches my hip, I’m surprised steam doesn’t immediately sizzle off of my skin.
I close my eyes as he drags me to him. He kisses me long and slow as he leads me to the bed.
My knees hit the back of the bed and he pushes me down. I’m waiting for him. I want him. I don’t care about anything else.
He crawls on top of me and I open my legs for him, welcoming him home. He fills me up, stretches me out.
I want more. I claw at him.
He thrusts inside of me until I hit my peak, and then I release. His grip tightens as he does the same.
I’m breathless. I’m panting like I’m the shifter. And my magic buzzes inside of me, satiated.
I shouldn’t be with him, but I can’t leave, and I think that explains our entire relationship.
Chapter Eight
I wake to Rex kissing my shoulder. It’s the last thing I expect from him. Rex isn’t the sort of guy who cares about tenderness. At least, he didn’t prioritize it during our relationship. Not to say that he was a bad lover. Quite the contrary, he was the best I ever had. But he isn’t the sort I expect to recite me poetry and to kiss me just because. Hos love is much more quiet, which I appreciate.
As a result, to see him act this way, makes me feel… strange, but not in a bad way. I like it. I like this side of him that I had never seen before. I think I even want to see more of it.
I close my eyes, allowing myself to enjoy it. His lips trail up my shoulder, chaste and soft, like the ghost of a butterfly’s wing, caressing my skin. It causes my insides to melt even more than they already have and I sink in my bed, waiting for more, needing more from him.
“You are so goddamn beautiful,” he tells me.
I swallow but it does nothing for me. My throat is still scratchy and I can only imagine that my tongue is as rough as a cat’s.
“Hmm.” I’m not sure how to respond to his words so I don’t.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, pulling away from me.
I crack open an eye and wait. “What do you mean?”
“You tensed up,” he says. “You thought of something and it made you uncomfortable. What happened? What were you thinking just then?”
I sigh. “I’m thinking, I want to know why suddenly you want to be with me after we broke up,” I say. I can’t keep the words in my mouth so I don’t even bother to try. “I want to know if you’ve suddenly decided to be with me because you realize I’m your fated mate, if your feelings for me are only because of that.”
Rex breathes out, his nostrils flaring as he does so. I don’t like that I’ve made him feel bad about his feelings for me but I do want to know the truth. This Rex, the sweet, tender Rex, is amazing, but is he only here because we’re destined to be together? I want to know he’s here because he loves me, not because fate told him to.
“Is that what you think?” he asks, his golden eyes tracing the shape of my face.
I squirm underneath him, unsure how I feel about the intensity of his gaze on my skin.
“Well, as usual, you’re wrong.” He wraps a lock of hair around his finger and gently tugs on it, but not too hard.
“Am I?” I ask, already annoyed with him.
“You are,” he says. “Fated mates isn’t something that just happens and we’re powerless to control it. It isn’t something we can control, however, and it’s something you should understand. You aren’t sacrificing yourself by agreeing to it. Think about it, Andrea. You have to agree to it in the first place. You have to give your permission. It’s not something that just happens to you.”
I frown. He’s right, of course. From everything he’s said about fated mates, there seems to be this component of consent that plays into it.
“Think about it like this,” he says, shifting where he is, “you’re destined to be a doctor. Being a doctor is something you’re naturally good it. You will serve your community and your people by allowing yourself to be a doctor. However, you could go to law school, be a lawyer, and still be happy and successful if that’s what you want to do.”
“So, you don’t have to be with me?” I ask him, my eyes on him. “You just…” I let my voice trail off as realization dawns on me.
“Want to,” he finishes. He doesn’t flinch as he says the word. He doesn’t do anything that says he’s unhappy with his current predicament. “Yeah, I want to. And that’s why I’m asking you what you want. I’m asking you to consider this.”
“You could be
happy with someone else,” I point out.
“I’m happy with you.”
“We fight.”
“I like fighting,” he says. “Especially the making up part.”
I press my lips together. My face is getting hot. I have to look away. I think I’m doing the right thing. I’m trying to point out all of the reasons why this won’t work and it’s falling on deaf ears. Hell, I’m not buying what I’m selling either.
“Why do you want to be with me?” My voice cracks. It’s helpless. How can I convince him that this isn’t a good idea when I can’t seem to convince myself? “We could barely stand each other, being together.”
Rex scoffs as though he doesn’t believe that. “I’m crazy about you,” he says. “And I want you to want me. But I’m not going to force you. You make me a better person. And I love you for it.”
He loves me?
I’m not expecting that.
I kiss him with as much fervor as I can.
When I pull away, I give him a shy nod. I hope he understand what I mean by it. I hope he gets it.
“I…” He’s surprised. “It’s a nip on your neck. That’s it. Is that okay with you?”
I nod my head.
Rex swallows and kisses me again. He pulls back and takes his hand in mine, lacing his fingers through mine, resting his forehead on mine. For a moment, we just breathe.
And then, he tilts his head down and positions his lips on my throat before sinking his fangs into my flesh.
Chapter Nine
As much as I wanted to report that my life changed because I let Rex bite me, that didn’t happen. In fact, we make love again. The thrill of being claimed by him as rocked my senses more than I expect, and when I climax this time, there is something different, something more meaningful than I anticipate.
He holds me close in his arms and we fall asleep together. I actually feel safe in his arms and I’m mystified by just how much I care about him. I’m not sure if fated mates can actually affect me the way it affects him. If so, I’m feeling it already. And I don’t mind as much as I thought I might.
My happiness and contentment with Rex doesn’t last long, however. We’re both woken up to the front door to my place splintering. The sound shocks me awake, like a bad dream.
Except I know this isn’t a dream.
I scramble out of bed and throw on whatever clothes I can find. I don’t even check to see what they are or who they belong to. All that matters is that I’m fully clothed. Rex, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to care as much about properly attiring himself as I do. Unlike me, he gets out of bed with purpose, casts his eyes in front of them, narrowed, as though trying to figure out what ‘s going on. He positions himself in front of me though he doesn’t actually say it. He’s trying to protect me.
A flare of annoyance shoots through my system but I manage to temper it down. He’s being protective. I don’t want to take that away from him, not when I know it’s a big deal to who he is. Instead, I search within myself for my magic.
I reach deep inside of myself and I can feel tendrils of magic wrap around me. My heart skips. This is it. I’ve never connected to my magic before. Granted, I don’t realize I even had magic until recently but I can’t believe I can access it with relative ease. I swallow and shift. I need more of it.
Can I call it forward?
“Andrea,” Rex growls, snapping me out of my thoughts.
I realize he’s thrown on his pants, though the way they dip on his hips, he hasn’t made an effort to find his boxers. Which, fine, whatever makes him more comfortable. I just wish I wasn’t so drawn to the sight of him, especially considering I need to focus on whoever’s trying to attack me. I would bet the deed of this house that it’s the same person who sent those assholes to get me from before.
“I need you to leave,” he says.
“Like hell,” I snap.
I tense my body, searching for more magic to reach.
He growls again.
I turn my attention from the door to him. “Listen,” I say, “just because I let you bite me doesn’t mean I’m going to let you do all the work. I can fight for myself, you know.”
“Trust me, I’m well-aware of that fact,” he says, “but you also need to know that you don’t have to do everything by yourself.”
“I’m not leaving,” I tell him.
He clenches his teeth together. “Fine, we’ll –“
Before he can finish, the door to the bedroom is blasted open and a woman I don’t recognize stands there, white light shooting from her fingertips. Her face is pinched, snarled, and she looks at me like she hates me, like I’m the worst person she’s ever laid eyes on.
“You,” she snarls.
“Me,” I say back.
I look over at Rex to see if maybe he knows her, but he’s focused on how to take her out. I can tell by the way his teeth are showing, how his brow is furrowed low and hangs over his eyes. He doesn’t recognize her. I doubt he’d care if he did. Rex sees her as a threat first and foremost.
“Do you know who I am?” she asks.
“Should I?”
For a moment, nothing happens. The light fizzles from her fingertips so shadows consume the room once more. Everything is silent. And then –
She starts laughing. She laughs like it’s the funniest thing she’s ever heard.
I look over at Rex again. There’s a glimmer of confusion on his face, but other than that, he’s stony and silent. He’s still tense, as though he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop, so to speak. He doesn’t let up.
I look for my magic and I feel it, but I’m not sure what to do with it. Can I really attack someone I don’t know? How would I even go about doing that?
“Of course you don’t know,” she says, shaking her head. “Why would they tell you?”
“Tell me what?” I demand to know. Magic cackles through my body. I’m tired of the games. I just want answers.
“Your family killed my family,” she says.
Even though I don’t want to believe it, I can tell that she does. She’s already past the point of reasoning with her.
“Why would they do that?” I ask instead. I don’t know this person. I’ve never heard of her. My grandmother said nothing of her when I went to visit her, except… “You sent the men after me.”
“I had to know if you had powers,” she says. “I had to see if they finally manifested. And knowing they had, I realized I couldn’t trust them to do anything with you. I had to get to you myself. I would put you down, no one else.”
“Why would my family kill yours?” I ask again.
“So they can control the town, you silly little fool,” she says as though it’s obvious. “My family has had control for years until your grandmother took it from us and gave it to the people.”
Realization dawns on me. “She saved the people,” I say. “She made it so everything was fair and just.”
“And killing my family is fair and just?” she screeches.
Without warning, Rex lunges. She blasts him with magic and he falls. He grunts, however, and relief courses through me, but he has trouble getting up.
“And now to finish what I came for,” she says, lifting her hand. Magic flares.
I brace myself. I have no idea how I’m going to get out of this unless my magic listens to me. And I don’t know how that’s going to happen because I barely realized I had powers in the first place.
Chapter Ten
I barely manage to duck out of the way. My heart is jagged edges, slicing into my chest.
I’m scared. I’m not supposed to be scared. I’m supposed to be confident, powerful. I’m supposed to know exactly what I want and go after it, especially with these powers. But I’m not. I’m the same Andrea, I just have magic buzzing in me that I don’t even know how to use.
This person, this witch – Marcy – knows what she’s doing. I have no idea how I’m going to survive this, let alone fight back.
My breath
ing is ragged. I don’t dare turn and look at Rex. I know she’d take advantage of my distraction. More than that, there’s a good chance that she may use him against me. She already knows I care about him. There’s no doubt about that. But right now, her focus is on me and I want to keep it that way. I just have to make sure to keep my head above water.
“It’d be easier if you just die,” Marcy says. She holds up a hand and I can see a ball of light form just above it. It’s energy. Something in me knows she’s drawing on energy in order to power her magic.
“Not gonna happen,” I grit through my teeth. “I’m sorry for what’s happened to you. I am. But there’s nothing I can do about it.”
Without warning, she winds up like she’s pitching on the mound of Yankee Stadium and shoots the energy ball directly for me. There’s no way I can avoid it. It’s too fast. Rex grabs my ankle and knocks me down just in time. I fall flat on the wood floor. My head shoots up with pain but I don’t care.
It’s too close.
I don’t have time to reach up and cradle my forehead. Instead, I reach for the floor and pick myself up. I grunt. Magic tickles my fingers and I’m glad. I didn’t know if I’d be able to hold it the way I had before she started shooting her magic at me. As long as I focus on it, I can feel it.
I catch my breath and stand up. I don’t wait to collect myself in a standing position before I push out my hand in her direction. My magic is unrestrained, uncontrolled, and it surrounds her like a brick wall. She’s thrown back until she hits the wall of my living room.
I roll my shoulders back, breathless again. I don’t realize the toll magic takes on the body while using it. I’m surprised I’m even able to stand. All I want to do is crawl into my bed and sleep for the next twenty-four hours.
“You think she’s out?” Rex asks me from where he stands. From my peripheral, I can see cuts on his body. The blood is slight and his shifter abilities already have them healing.
“I don’t know.” I manage to hoist a tendril of magic deep from the depths of my body. Just in case she’s not as out as she seems.
