That confession made Todd sit up straighter. “Not in a way that I think harmed her,” Bree quickly spelled out, “but she’d picked up on something and thought I was sick. I wanted you to know that because we’re parents together and whatever affects Amber, however little it is, you deserve to know.”
“Thank you for telling me,” Todd said sincerely. “It means that you trust me as a parent and I appreciate that. But are you okay?”
“I’m much better now,” Bree affirmed. “Doctor Roz diagnosed me with an episode of depression, which means that it’s not permanent and with the right treatment such as medication and a healthy lifestyle, I should be okay in a few months and able to go off the medication. I’ll also be going for weekly therapy sessions with Doctor Roz.”
“To be honest,” Bree confessed, “I think that I just needed the kick in my behind to pull myself together. I know that it sounds optimistic and because of that, and because I don’t want to take chances and get sucked into that black hole again, I’m going to follow the treatment to the letter. But, my grandparents and Shelly have been great. Even Amber,” Bree took out Amber’s card and her grandparent’s letter and handed it to him. Nervous again, she chattered on, “So, all will work out in the end. It’s already better. I actually went from not wanting to see anyone to having a blast last night.”
Todd folded the card and letter and returned it to her, then scooted over and pulled her into a hug. Bree was so startled that she didn’t know how to react and remained frozen in his arms. Pulling away, she looked up at him quizzically.
His arm around her shoulders, he looked at her, sincere concern showing in his expression, “Regardless of all that’s gone wrong in our relationship, there was a lot of right too. And, regardless of us having a daughter together, you were my friend for a very long time. I’ll always care for you Bree. I can’t ignore the fact that you were a major part of my life before and will be going forward. So, I’m sorry for what you’ve been going through and I can’t help but feel as though this mess we got ourselves into helped put you there. I’m not taking the blame entirely because I feel that there’s enough for both of us, but I’m sorry for my part in it and want you to know, as the mother of my child and as my friend, if you need anything, I’ll be there.”
Bree looked up at him in surprise, touched by how easily he uttered those words and meant them. Then again, Todd had always been quick to rescue and help out; it was how he was made. Remembering her conversation with Shelly the previous night, she noted that again, here was a classic example of what they did and Todd was doing it now. He was putting his feelings away in his pocket and focusing on what needed to be done.
Bree wiggled out from under his arm and took his hands in hers instead. “Your offer means a lot to me and I want you to know that. I also want you to know that if I do need your help I will ask. But I first need to try to get through this on my own. I need to not hide what’s really wrong away and face this head on. Does that make any sense?”
Todd nodded, “Sure, I can appreciate that. So, I’ll give you the room to do what you have to as long as you shout when you need me. Deal?”
Bree took the hand he held out to her and shook it, lips curved in relief. “Deal,” she affirmed.
“Now, the next confession,” she declared.
“That sounds ominous,” Todd stated, seriously.
“It’s about the fight we had,” Bree ventured. “No, nothing to worry about, I think,” she rushed in when she caught him dragging a hand over his face.
“Do you think that now’s the time to discuss that with what you’re going through?” he questioned.
Bree tipped her head, “Yes.”
“Okay,” Todd waved a hand to illustrate his agreement, “what about that night?”
“I need to apologize to you,” she began this new, difficult topic. “I realize now that I hadn’t dealt with what we’d both gone through. More specifically, I hadn’t dealt with me leaving Devil’s Peak, my feelings about that, about us and then returning. It wasn’t just sex that night, Todd. I panicked and used the sex, the lovemaking,” Bree corrected, “as an excuse to not have to deal with the feelings I had from the past. The anger, the hurt, and the disappointment I felt in both of us. Talking with Shelly last night, I acknowledge that those feelings are normal but because I hadn’t dealt with them, they were bottled up and after the kind of lovemaking we had, it kind of burst the bottle.”
“What are you saying,” Todd asked.
“I’m saying that I’m sorry,” Bree professed. “I care for you too, Todd and always will and I’m sorry that I deliberately hurt you.”
“Come here,” Todd exclaimed and pulled her to his side. “Jeesh, you’ve had a hectic time!” He took a moment, rubbing his hand through his hair and over his face. Glancing at her, he noticed the pensive look in her eyes. “Since we’re being honest with each other, I might as well add that I’m sorry, too. I was mad as hell at you. We’d had an amazing night together and then that fight just ruined it. But, I said some pretty harsh things myself and I guess that I was trying to hurt you back. I do still get a twinge when I think of what I’ve missed in Amber’s life and I do hurt when I think that you didn’t trust me enough to come back for you. But in reality, it is what it is and no moping is going to change the circumstances. I knew that when I agreed to go ahead with this amicable co-parenting idea of yours. So, when I said what I did, I said it out of spite.”
“Apology accepted,” Bree said after a few minutes of contemplative silence, relief coursing through her and renewed hope that they could work things out.
“Ditto,” Todd replied, playing on older, fonder memories.
For the first time since Bree had returned to Devil’s Peak, the grins they shared were pure and honest.
Chapter 16
“Now you be a good girl,” Bree leaned down and spoke to Amber, “and listen to Charlotte.” Smiling at the gym’s child-minder, Bree returned to the lobby to wait for Shelly who was getting changed. The gym wasn’t very large, but considering it was one of the newer additions in town, as well as the only gym for miles, it had a bit of everything. Its only competition, the gym at The Lodge, was typically stocked with the basic equipment holiday makers sought out such as treadmill, step-machine, and a few basic weights.
It also meant that the place was packed with after-work fitness enthusiasts or people trying to get fitter, healthier, or thinner. Bree walked over to the large wall on the one side of the lobby that held a variety of notices, the classes held in the aerobics room and their services.
“Bree,” Todd advanced towards her and called out in greeting. He looked like he’d just had a shower as his hair was all wet, a towel was draped around his neck, and he was carrying a zipped-up sports bag.
“Hi,” Bree smiled back, focusing on his face and refusing to look at his long, muscular legs being shown off inadvertently in his shorts. “I didn’t know that you come here.”
“I have since it opened,” he replied. “Since running the business interferes with the amount of time I can spend outdoors, I thought I better do something to maintain fitness.”
“I’ve just joined myself,” Bree answered. “Shelly’s joined with me. I’m just waiting for her to get changed. Oh and Amber’s in the children’s area. She didn’t want to join any of their exercise programs today. I think she’s scoping out what happens here first before she decides what she wants to do. So for now she’s happily making things in the craft area.”
“That’s okay,” Todd nodded. “I’ll pop by now before I leave and see what she’s up to.”
“Speaking of Amber,” Bree ventured, “I’ve focused a lot on her this week. I wanted to show her that I was getting better. And one of the things I’ve started is a games night. It’s basically a TV-free night where she and I play board games or Wii – quality time that’s fun and does not require staring comatose at the television. My grandparents decided to join in and it actually turned out to be a blast. S
o, if you want to join us, you’d be welcome. We’ve dedicated every Wednesday night to it as it fits into Amber’s homework and extra-mural time-table.”
“That sounds good,” Todd replied. “Thanks for the invitation. I’d like to join you.”
“My pleasure,” Bree smiled back at him.
“So, what do you have there?” He asked, pointing to the flyer she held in her hand.
Bree colored pink, wishing she’d hidden the darn thing away except that the baggy t-shirt and tights she wore didn’t leave much room for stuffing things away in them – unless you put things in your sports bra and that was not something she was going to do. Maybe, though, it would’ve been preferable to do that than have him look at the flyer.
“Nothing much,” she blushed harder, effectively mitigating the nonchalance she was trying to portray.
“Really?” Todd asked, disbelievingly. “Come on, Bree, give. I’ll find out anyway and I’ve been coming here for a while so I know what’s good and what to avoid. The special classes are expensive so my advice might save you money.”
Bree sighed in resignation. When he got an idea into his head he was like a bulldog with a bone. She’d learned earlier on in their friendship, before they’d even started going out, to just give in – it was easier to say ‘I told you so’.
He looked at the flyer in silence, his raised brows embarrassing her to no end. “Well?” Bree inquired. “What’s your opinion?”
Todd looked back at her, “It’s a waste of your money. You don’t need post-pregnancy classes ‘to hit those flabby areas you just can’t get rid of’,” he read from the flyer. “There’s nothing flabby about you.
“You know how I feel about my tummy,” Bree reminded him.
“Yes,” Todd nodded, “and you know that I disagree.” He stopped her retort with a show of his hand and went on, “Look, it’s abdominal strengthening that you need.”
Bree looked at him questioningly and Todd responded with a sheepish, guilt-laden grin. “I looked up the ‘mummy tummy’ as you called it after… you know…”
Bree nodded, waving a hand for him to continue. “Okay, before I explain what I found. I need to be clear that I think that there’s nothing wrong with your body and that includes your tummy. I only looked it up because what you said made me curious – not because I agree with you.”
“I get that Todd,” Bree stated. How could she not have after he’d so sweetly convinced her? “The thing is that I still have issues with it and on this new journey I’m on, I’m doing something about the stuff I don’t like in my life or about myself. So, this,” she shook the flyer in the air, “is for me. So, go on, tell me what you’ve found.”
Todd searched her face and found genuine interest. Breathing a sigh of relief that his ‘investigations’ hadn’t upset the apple cart again, he explained, “It seems that the plastic surgery information you read was accurate. There’s nothing that can be done to bring the muscles back together again after having had a baby. But, you can strengthen them, which flattens and tones that area – not completely, but you’ll see a difference. And the way to do it is pretty simple. In fact, I do them all the time. I could show you and save you the cash.”
“Two things,” Bree interjected, “while that,” she waved a hand at the t-shirt covered six pack, “is hot on a guy. I personally don’t want to be all muscular. And why do you want to do this?”
Todd shrugged, “We agreed last Saturday to work together and to try and forget the past right?” At Bree’s nod of acquiescence, he continued. “I said that I’d help out if I could with what you’re going through and I can with this, so why not?”
Bree recognized that he was waving a white flag and given the good place they were at, though not far from tentative, she felt urged to take him up on his offer. “Okay,” she nodded, “if you promise that I won’t become all muscular and sporting a six-pack, we have a deal."
“Bree,” Todd replied, grinning, “A six pack is kinda hard to get and keep so there’s no danger of that. So, you think they’re hot, huh?”
Bree searched the floor for an invisible something and muttered, “You know they are, so stop.”
Feeling oddly satisfied by the grudging compliment, he pointed his arm in the direction of a big, blue plastic mat towards the back of the weight-lifting area.
Bree put a hand on his arm to stop him. “I’ve got to go tell Shelly that I’m skipping this session with her.”
“No need to,” Todd responded. “I saw her go up the stairs and wave while we were talking. She must be going to the aerobics class and from the music coming from up there, they’ve started already. You sure you want to do this?”
“Sure,” Bree answered. “I’ve never been big on exercise though, which you know, so I’m new at this. So be gentle okay?”
“With you,” Todd looked down at her, making her insides melt, “always.”
Oh boy, she thought, this should be interesting.
xxx
“So, what was up with you and Todd at the gym?” Shelly asked, sliding into the booth at the local diner. They hadn’t been able to speak about it, after exercising as Bree had to get Amber home.
“And hello to you too, Shelly,” Bree greeted, sarcastically.
“Oh never mind that,” Shelly waved it away. “Spill.”
“Todd’s helping me work out,” Bree shared. “He knows what physical insecurities I have, and when he saw the flyer I was holding, he offered to help out and save me some cash. So, once a week, when I’m not going to gym with you, he’ll help me out. He’s just being friendly after the chat the other day.”
“I’m not sure that’s all there is to it,” Shelly offered.
Bree shrugged. “If there is more to it, then you know I’ll be glad, but if not, then that’s okay. We’ll work things out. Our truce just seems a bit new to be jumping to conclusions or onto him just yet.”
Shelly nodded, “Okay, you make a valid point. So, what’s this meeting about?”
Shelly was referring to Bree calling her and their friends up to meet her at the diner. Bree had to drop Amber off at Todd’s that afternoon for a play date and figured she’d use the opportunity to get together with some friends and pick their brain. She was touched that, despite the short notice she’d given them that morning, they’d all agreed to show up.
“Let’s wait for everyone to sit down,” Bree pointed at the diner’s door where the rest of their friends were coming through.
Moments later with berry pie and coffees ordered, Bree explained the reason for the meeting. “Well first off, I realized, that I needed to see more of you guys.”
“I agree,” piped Kristine. “When you’re married and you have kids, that can become the center of your life, as it should, but after going out with you guys the other night, I realized that I needed to get out a bit more – have some girl time.”
The others bobbed their heads in agreement and Shelly suggested, “Seeing as we’re all on the same page, why don’t we agree that we do this the first Saturday afternoon of every month.”
They smiled appreciatively at Shelly; she’d always been very managing. On the cheerleading squad, Bree'd had the ideas and Shelly helped figure out the details.
“Deal,” they all said in unison and giggled liked the high school kids they had once been, feeling lighter and excited by the prospect of getting time off.
“Now, I want to pick your brains,” Bree sat back and picked at her pie. “I spoke to Jack this morning at The Lodge about an idea. He wants to start using high school kids to work during the summer and on weekends as part of an internship program in hospitality management.”
“What a lovely idea,” Shelly clapped her hands in glee. “The DPC can help; maybe include it in one of the youth programs. And if not, we can certainly offer advice on what has worked and not worked for us.”
Bree nodded, “And, I did tell him that. In fact, I gave him your number so expect a call.”
“But, that’s not
why you want to pick our brains,” Megan observed.
“No,” Bree shook her head. “You know how I always enjoyed planning a party.”
“Sure do,” chirped Kristine, smiling wickedly and eliciting laughs from all around the table.
“Yes,” Bree grinned, “we had those types of parties, too. But I used to love planning all sorts of parties – especially the kiddie ones.”
“Oh,” exclaimed Kelly, “I remember. You did the Halloween party for the kids for the DCP. That was adorable. You know, after that guacamole brain dip, I still haven’t eaten any avocados to this day.”
“And you did the princess and pirates pageant for the pre-school too,” Alice reminded them.
“Yes,” Bree bobbed her head, “those parties. Well when I was at The Lodge, I noticed that Jack had just installed a humungous jungle gym. It’s huge, literally the size of a standard house. And he paid quite a large sum of money for it, because he ordered it from a company specializing in that type of thing. So, looking at it, I thought how much Amber would love it, and how nice it would be to have a party for her so that the kids could play on it. I realized that this was a gap in the market. So, why not throw parties there? When I mentioned it to Jack, he said that it was a great idea but that he didn’t have the time or the staff capacity to go into such a venture. So, I asked him if I could give it a shot and do a demonstration as well as come up with a proposal. So, what do you think?”
“You’re right about there being nothing like that in town,” agreed Kristine. “I try to make Amanda’s parties special but we always just end up having it at our house every year and it nearly always turns out to be a family meal with friends or a barbeque. Crazy Tom bought a few jumping castles in Fairbanks a few years back so we often get that too. Everyone in town basically does the same thing.”
Home for Love (An Adult Contemporary Romance) Page 14
