by JA Huss
“Yeah,” I say into the phone.
“So which one of you assholes is spying on me?”
“Aw, fuck.”
“Seriously, Vaughn? You need to spy—”
“It’s not me, it’s Felicity.”
“That kid? Why the fuck is she digging through my shit?”
“Because she thinks you’re a douchebag and she wants to mess with you.”
“Whatever. I’m not the one bringing a girl to meet Mom and Dad with a vibrator up her hole. And you know, it’s real interesting that Felicity is taking all this interest in me while she should be doing damage control for you. Did you forget that Sam invited Elite Lifestyles Magazine to the wedding so they could do a spread on her? Because they saw that whole brunch debacle.”
“What? Sam never told me that. Since when does she do interviews?”
“Since her dickhead husband made her.”
“I gotta go.” I end the call and go back inside to make myself a drink. Holy shit, this day went all to hell. No wonder Sam was so upset the night of her wedding. If Tray wasn’t still back on Saint Thomas having a non-honeymoon for one, I’d kill that asshole.
I pour four fingers of Scotch and sit down at the bar out by the pool. Something is very wrong. Something is very, very wrong. I can just feel it. It’s like a snake, slithering up behind me, just waiting for me to be complacent so it can strike.
I take a long swallow of my drink and then speed-dial Ray, my security coordinator. “I need you to double up on the Denver client and get a team to dig up information about the reporter who attended my sister’s wedding last weekend.”
“On it, boss,” Ray says.
“Check the Denver house for bugs and steal her phone.”
“No problem.”
“Discretely. And then put it back so she thinks she misplaced it.”
I end the call and swallow a long gulp of Scotch just as my phone buzzes in my hand. The number comes up unknown so I ignore it and take a seat on the couch to think things through. The magazine reporter is a wild card I was not anticipating. And fucking Conner knew all along back on the island. That’s why he was talking shit to me about getting discovered and having all my dirty deeds come back to haunt me.
But he’d never turn on me. We might fight a lot, but we’re brothers and that means something. All growing up Conner was the only real friend I had. Sam was too young, Conner was too young too, but when you’re isolated from the world for your own protection, well, you take what you get. And Conner was what I got.
He was secluded from the craziness that my father and I endured for being famous. He went to a real school, he had real girlfriends, he experienced a childhood. I, on the other hand, had celebrity fundraisers for social events. Or wrap parties overflowing with drugs. Or red-carpet events where the sole purpose of the paparazzi was to make me look bad.
This is the kind of shit I’ve been building walls against my entire life. And every time I think I have it all under control, it spirals.
My phone buzzes again, this time to signify a voice mail. I absently grab it off the table, my curiosity getting the best of me, and press the icon for messages.
“Vaughn,” a crying woman says from the small speaker. How did she get my number? “I have to talk to you, it’s an emergency. Call me back at the hotel spa number.”
No. This is not good. Something is very wrong.
I delete the message and pull up email instead. I hate to do it, but I can’t see Grace tonight. I need to think this over, figure out what’s going on, get my bearings, and make a plan of retaliation.
Sweets, please accept my apologies. Leaving town on business, don’t know when I’ll be back.
Damage control. If this magazine reporter is on to me, it’s better to cut that shit off now and lie low. I take another swig of my Scotch and kick my feet up on the table. There’s not much choice. This is my life. No matter how hard I try to be normal, no matter how far away I think I am, it’s never far enough. That traditional family I never had is just a dream. My life, for better or worse, is a string of side-show events that prohibits me from having a real relationship.
So fuck it. Why bother, right? Why bother fighting it. I’m lucky—at least I have Felicity, even if that relationship is about as unconventional as it gets.
I grab my phone and press Felicity’s face so I can fill her in on the reporter and tell her to leave Conner alone. The call rings through to voice mail. I know she’s in school and won’t answer, but it was worth a try.
I stare out at my ten-million-dollar view, lost in thought.
Why can’t I ever get what I want? Just once I’d like to get what I really, truly want. I want to fly back to Denver and sleep over at Grace’s house. But I can’t. Something is cooking and getting sloppy now will have consequences. Once the paparazzi has you on target, they never let go until they get what they want. They’re always around. Waiting in trashcans. Hiding in bushes. Following me three cars back. And they know one of these days I’ll get drunk, or sad, or desperate and I’ll fuck up. Then they’ll get what they’ve been tracking for years. Proof that my private life is nothing but a long string of sexual debauchery.
I down the rest of my drink and pull up my agent. That rings through to voice mail as well—figures—but this time I leave a message. “Larry,” I say with a slight slur from the Scotch. “Set me up with a beautiful date for the IM2 premiere and I’ll go.”
Chapter Thirty-Four - Grace
#PrinceJerk
VAUGHN never calls again. It’s been two weeks of silence after he canceled our last Twitter date. Nothing. And I’m pretty sure the spies are gone too because last night I met my co-worker for a drink thinking I could draw Asher out with jealousy.
But no. He’s gone. And what did I figure? That I’d be the girl to change him? That I’d be the girl he falls in love with? That I’d be the girl who could claim his heart, even though countless others have tried and failed?
I’m an idiot.
For years, my Dirty Heaven was Vaughn Asher. I lived and breathed for those Saturday nights and ever since I met him in person, my fantasy faded away, one disappointment at a time.
He’s a jerk.
He’s a sexual deviant—and even though I did like that date we had, a BDSM relationship was never part of my perfect fantasy. I didn’t exactly dream of wedding bells and diapers, but it was a monogamous partnership kind of dream. I would live in Denver and build my career, flying out to see him in Hollywood every weekend for parties and fun. Then he’d fly back with me on Sunday nights to fuck me in ways that did not involve kneeling at his feet or having bite-sized morsels placed on my tongue. He’d kiss me goodnight on my doorstep like the perfect Prince Charming and fly home for a week of hard work and I’d do the same here in my own little corner of the world.
And although I think he might be on board with the distance that I prefer in a relationship, his unique sexual requests are not part of my long-term plan. That is vacation sex. That is one-night-stand sex. That is not partnership sex.
So it’s better this way. I’m perfectly happy like this. I’m going to find myself a new fantasy prince and give him all my Dirty Heaven attention. Maybe a younger one this time. Someone more my age. Someone who doesn’t need to prove his sexual prowess with games.
“Earth to Grace?”
I’m going to forget all about Vaughn Asher, wipe him right out of my life.
“Hello?”
Which is easier said than done when those stupid fucking Invisible Man 2 posters are all over this fucking airport.
“See something you like up there? Because that’s my soon-to-be husband.”
“What?” I look over at Kristi who is handing me a cup of coffee from the Starbucks while stuffing her face with a blueberry muffin. “No!” I laugh. “No, I was looking at the IM2 poster next to Johnny Blazen’s Broncos.”
“Oh, yeah, that Vaughn Asher is a dream. I’d do him.” She chuckles as we drag our luggage onto
the moving sidewalk that will take us down to the end of the concourse to the gate. The Blazens have hired a jet to shuttle Denver friends and family over to Vegas and they keep all the small airlines on the very edge of the concourse, making the walk a long one.
Hmmm. “He’s OK, I guess. Not quite my idea of a dream though. So speaking of the soon-to-be hubs—why isn’t he flying with you instead of me?”
She paints on her life-is-perfect smile like she’s been doing for the past two weeks and swallows hard. “He’s got football stuff tonight, so he’s going to fly in tomorrow.”
“Right. Football season.” I don’t get it. Their relationship is not what I expected. He’s never around. Always something about football. And she always makes excuses for him. They don’t even live together. And maybe some couples like that before they get married, but she’s pregnant. If I was pregnant—and I won’t be, so this is a total hypothetical—I’d throw a fit if my husband wasn’t there. I’d never put up with this.
Add in the fact that she practically let me make all her wedding choices for her, and I see a pattern emerging.
Kristi soon-to-be-Mrs.-Blazen has no mind of her own.
“You know, Kristi, it’s your wedding, so it would be expected for you to throw a little fit to get him here the night before. I mean, what about the bachelor party? Isn’t he dying to sneak into your room and ravish you inappropriately?”
Holy shit, why did I use that word?
“It’s different when you’re dating a famous person, Grace.” Her voice is pleasant and her smile is still fake as we get to the end of the slidewalk and heft our luggage back onto the tiled floor. We have to walk the rest of the way because we are out of moving sidewalks.
“Oh!” Kristi exclaims, pointing to a bathroom. “I wanna pee again, just in case.”
“You just peed after we came through security.”
“I know, but I hate to pee on the plane. One last time before we board. Here, take my luggage.”
I start to sigh but cut it short. She’s a client, Grace. Be graceful, like your name implies. I lean up against a wall to wait her out, but the buzz of my phone snaps me out of my irritated funk. I pull it out of my purse and stare at the screen.
Unknown number.
My heart rate speeds up immediately, but at the same time, I get a very sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Vaughn. It has to be Vaughn.
I press the accept tab with a nervous smile. “Hello?”
“Miss Kinsella?” an unfamiliar voice asks me from the other end of the line. “Are you Grace Kinsella?”
“Who’s this?”
“Miss Kinsella, my name is Jasinda Gonzales, I’m Vaughn Asher’s girlfriend, and I’ve noted a pattern of calls to this phone and I’d—I’d just like to know if he’s cheating on me?”
My head spins so bad I almost fall down. “Excuse me?”
“Are you near a TV, Miss Kinsella?”
“What?”
“A TV, or the internet. Because Buzz Hollywood is running a story on us right now, and I think you should see it.”
“Who the hell are you?”
“I told you—”
“I know what you said, but I’m sorry, you have the wrong number. I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
My shaky finger presses end and I just stare at the phone in my hand.
“Everything OK?” Kristi asks, taking possession of her luggage.
I look up at her, stunned. And I lie. Because I’m a good liar. I’ve been telling lies since I was a kid and my world fell apart. I’m good at faking OK. “Fine,” I say cheerfully. And suddenly I become Kristi soon-to-be-Mrs.-Blazen. I’m the one with the fake smile and feigned happiness. “Come on, we’re gonna be late if we don’t rush it. Can’t be late for your wedding!”
I let her chat the rest of the way to the gate and then thankfully we are there and the flight attendants take over. Everyone is already on the plane—all of them family and friends of Johnny, minus Johnny, of course. And even though the fact that Kristi has no friends or family of her own on this plane should raise a red flag, or at the very least make me pity her, I can only think of one thing.
Vaughn was cheating on someone when he was with me.
Of course he was, you idiot! He’s a fucking movie star!
The large corporate jet seats twenty, and all seats are filled, but thankfully almost everyone is seated on the long couches that line each side of the aisle. I settle into one of the few chairs near the front and try to calm my racing heart.
I need to see that webpage. I need to know what that woman was taking about. I fish around in my bag for my tablet and quickly do a search for Buzz Hollywood. It feels like an eternity before the page loads, but then—there he is.
My Vaughn is on the front page. A split picture of him and a dark-haired beauty who reminds me a lot of Bebe.
Jasinda Gonzales.
Asher’s pregnant girlfriend accuses him of infidelity and sexual abuse. Mr. Asher could not be reached for comment.
Sexual abuse.
Pregnant?
My stomach turns and I bolt up, looking for the bathroom.
“Ma’am,” a flight attendant calls out to me. “We’re getting ready to take off, please return to your seat.”
I push her out of my way and rush into the bathroom compartment. It’s bigger than a regular plane bathroom, thank God, but it’s still stifling and in that second I know I’m going to throw up. I fall to my knees, flip the head lid open, and puke.
I lose time as everything sinks in. The setup, the lies, the sexual conquest—that I willingly gave in to—and the NDA so I can’t talk about it.
I shake my head and laugh. I fell for him. I fell for my dirty Prince Charming. I swallowed him whole in more ways than one.
“Grace?” Kristi’s concerned voice asks from the other side of the door. “Are you OK? We need to take off but we can’t do that until you’re in your seat.”
Great.
I take a deep breath and pull on my everything-is-fine disguise. “Fine, fine!” I say cheerfully. “I just got a wave of nausea, that’s all. It’s gone now, be right out.”
“OK, come sit with me if you want. There’s room on our couch.”
My answer is the gushing of water from the sink, so hopefully that means Kristi has left to take her seat. I cup my hand under the tap and bring some cool water to my lips. I pat my face and straighten my professional blazer in the mirror, then paint on my smile as I pull the latch back on the door and emerge.
No one even notices, not even Kristi, so thank God for the little things. I scoot past the pissed-off flight attendant and take my seat. “You have to put that on airplane mode, ma’am,” the bitchy attendant snaps. “You’re holding up the departure.”
I grab my tablet from the floor, the web page at Buzz Hollywood still showing the story of Vaughn and his lies, and do as she says so she will leave me alone.
I don’t remember anything about that private corporate jet flight to Vegas. All I know is that I’m walking past a bar on our way out of the airport when I glance up and see Asher’s face on the TV.
It’s IM2 premiere night and he’s walking the red carpet. Not with me. Not with the woman carrying his baby. But with the biggest party slut in Hollywood.
His ex-girlfriend from when he was a teenager.
I want to get sick again, but I can’t afford to do that. I have to deal. I have to pretend life is perfect.
I’m still living the fantasy.
My Prince Charming is out there somewhere, his name just isn’t Vaughn Asher.
Chapter Thirty-Five - Grace
#CalledOutByKristi
THE limo ride from the airport to the Bellagio is agonizing. I sit between Kristi and her future mother-in-law, across from her future brother-in-law, and beam out the fake smile I perfected ten years earlier at her future father-in-law.
I nod my head. I laugh when they laugh. I add in cute little quips when the conversation calls for it.
I start drinking. Heavily.
And when we get to the hotel I go straight to my room. I have one hour to dress and prep for the rehearsal dinner. I need to change into my midnight-blue sheath dress and my discount shoes. It’s professional, not at all flashy. And while the shoes are pretty in a Target sort of way, they do not have red soles.
And that makes me sad all over again, because I really fell for the shoes Vaughn bought for me on the island. I have them with me, but I can’t. Not after the ultimate betrayal I just saw online. And that phone call. That woman, Jasinda, she thinks I’m the other woman.
I hit the minibar, grab a few bottles, fill a glass with ice, and fall back on the bed with my laptop.
Don’t do it, Grace, that little voice in my head says. Don’t look.
But of course, I absolutely am going to look. I pull up the webpage and just stare at the picture of Vaughn. It was taken recently because it’s a promo for IM2. He’s smiling and happy. His female co-star is in the picture with him, but they cut her off so they could do the side-by-side shot of the girlfriend.
I scroll down to read the article.
Ms. Gonzales says her relationship with Vaughn Asher began almost a year ago on the island of Saint Thomas—
I pour the contents of the little bottle into the glass and take a long swallow before I can continue reading. Of course she met him on Saint Thomas. It’s where he gets all his girls.
I wipe my mouth and return to the article.
—where he propositioned her to become his sexual submissive in exchange for money and gifts. “I was required to sign a nondisclosure agreement,” the teary-eyed Gonzales explains. “He told me people won’t understand the type of sexual relationship we have together. He said what we had was special and not something he did with just anyone. But I’ve seen him with other submissives on the island. Many of them. He has a sexual appetite that can’t be quenched and he insisted that he not have to use a condom, so of course, I find myself pregnant.”
